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How to get rid of a stalker

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  • How to get rid of a stalker

    Some of you saw my recent thread about an issue similar to this. Well the situation with the fired employee has escalated. For those of you who don't know, about 2 months ago I had to fire an employee for doing things with a boarders horses against his wishes. I was polite about it, after 2-3 warnings, I (and the boarder) had had enough.

    So she went on the typical rampage trying to shut me down, badmouthing me on Craigslist, giving me bad reviews, calling the sheriff on me, and the fire department...

    Well she has been keeping me from selling horses, leasing horses and everything, still. She uses fake email address and names (she must have hundreds for the) so we can't prove it, but she will email to make sure it's me and then tell everyone NOT to buy the horse and make up crap about it. I have lost several sales this way, but again, Can't prove it to sue her.
    I have tried disguising my ads so she doesn't know it's me and that doesn't work either, but I shouldn't have to tiptoe around just to sell a horse. Everyone on Craigslist is very wary now and I don't get emails about anything, not even saddles! Luckily my barn is full and I don't need to place boarding ads.
    Thank goodness she hasn't found me here yet, this is my only safe sanctuary. I really don't want to counter post either, seems like that will just turn into a back and forth Craigslist war.
    WWYD, this can't go on, I NEED to sell theses horses, and get rid of the psychopath.

    P.S. I have tried posting locally and on equine.com, dreamhorse.com, exc.

  • #2
    Time to contact a lawyer.
    Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
    Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
    -Rudyard Kipling


    • #3
      Originally posted by JSwan View Post
      Time to contact a lawyer.
      Ditto. Hope you kept copies of and saved everything. Keep us posted.
      <>< Sorrow Looks Back. Worry Looks Around. Faith Looks Up! -- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.


      • #4
        Contact a lawyer. I would think emails would be able to be traced back to her computer/phone. What did the police/fire dept say? Write down everything, time, date. Keep records!!! Good luck with this one.


        • #5
          Yes, get a lawyer. Keep copies and screen shots of everything. Even if it's resolved, keep them forever.


          • Original Poster

            I went to my lawyer when this first started and he said there isn't much we can do unless we take her to small claims court ourselves. in which case I don't think they would trace the emails to her computer, that seems like something they would do for a much bigger case. He also said freedom of speech goes along way, so we may not even get anything.
            Should I consider getting a different lawyer maybe?

            I've printed everything though, and the stack is no joke, 6 inches high!


            • #7
              Yes, you should consider getting a different lawyer.
              Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
              Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
              -Rudyard Kipling


              • #8
                Usually people who use multiple emails and screen names screw up at some point. PM me for some search tips.


                • #9
                  Originally posted by JSwan View Post
                  Yes, you should consider getting a different lawyer.
                  This is hurting your business and reputation. I know my commercial farm policy has something about coverage for websites and also advertising injury. Maybe check your insurance policy.


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by LauraKY View Post
                    Usually people who use multiple emails and screen names screw up at some point. PM me for some search tips.
                    Yep. Even if the person is using different email addresses and screen names, it's still easy to track him/her through the IP address that shows which computer sent the emails. Even if the person thinks of this and uses multiple computers, there's often a pattern of use (which helps track the person down). So, keep printing off everything...make multiple copies...and find a lawyer willing to do the investigating to pin down this person.


                    • #11
                      My X?H has done skip tracing for a bail bondman in the past and has done a few searching for various things (including finding a "lost" horse for someone on UDBB a couple years ago). PM me if you want some help. I can't speak for him directly, but he may be interested in helping.
                      "Of course it's hard. It's supposed to be hard. It's the Hard that makes it great."

                      "Get up... Get out... Get Drunk. Repeat as needed." -- Spike


                      • #12
                        Does this gal have any history of mental illness or drug use? Mental health services or adult protective services might be able to help you. My mother had a stalker for a while. The woman was bipolar or schiz, I can't remember which, basically hard core nuts. It got to the point of involuntary committal as the calls and harassment escalated. Unfortunately, the doc wimped out at the last minute. I think she ended up in some out patient program. Eventually she got her meds straight, & she hasn't bothered anyone for a while.
                        Visit my Spoonflower shop


                        • #13
                          So sorry you are going through such awful stress from what, based on your postings, may be an irrational, vengeful person with too much time on their hands.

                          From your description, I would assume this person has problems that extend way beyond you, and needs some intervention and perhaps some help. Is there a parent or relative you can contact? If so, contact them not as a "victim", but as someone who is concerned about her well-being?

                          Best of luck and I hope the stressful situation ends soon and ends well.


                          • #14
                            Don't advertise on craigslist. Advertise only on dreamhorse, or other similar boards. Put in your add serious inquiries by phone only(due to spam). People understand that there are crazies online, and will call if they are interested. Chances are the crazy stalker chick will not call you.


                            • #15
                              Use all the venues the stalker is after you.

                              Good idea to consult with your insurance, they may have some ideas, may recommend an attorney in your area, may even help you directly if it is in their contract.

                              Maybe look into getting a bulldog, personal injury attorney.
                              Get sheriff/police reports on file.
                              Let Craiglist know there is an attorney and police report, so they take you seriously, even if they tell you they can't do much.

                              I would let your attorney be the one to make any connection with the stalker, don't you call or email or say anything to or about her to anyone not involved with the case.
                              You attorney can send a desist letter if appropriate.

                              I have a garden variety stalker on forums, nothing compared with your situation, because I don't have anything to sell to the public, so the stalker could not interfere with that.
                              My neighbor is our sheriff and his advice worked.
                              Stalker is still around, but not with direct confrontation, just laying low for now.

                              Stalkers are a bit off, tend to think they are right, the world doesn't understand them, everyone is after them, they obsess on someone for whatever reasons and you can't really do much about that, but minimize any damage they do.

                              In your case, I would be afraid that lady is off enough to do real, physical damage to your property, horses or yourself if you let this escalate, so thread carefully, please.


                              • #16
                                I had a stalker. I went to the police and filed an emergancy protective order. At least where I live, you can get on for 30 days until the court date. my stalker was an exboyfriend who also was an attorney. while most of my evidence was "circumstantial" as he knew how to keep things clean. the court date was enough to have a judge read him the riot act. It was obvious this guy was harrassing me, but I couldn't prove it as I wasn't savy enough. The judge did tell the guy if I felt like he was near me or tried to contact me in any way, that I should call the police and the judge would make sure he went to jail. Liked that judge..he always gets my vote as the stalker finally left me alone (after 3 years!).

                                So I suggest saving some money, but find out how to file an emergancy protective order (I had to go to the county courthouse). It may be enough to get her to stop.
                                I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!


                                • #17
                                  It's not Chanter, is it???? Does she have an unneutered Shih Tsu as a service dog?


                                  • Original Poster

                                    Nope not Chanter. This lady has a criminal record, we saw on the cops computer when he filed a report for my boarder. We don't know from where though so it's hard to find.


                                    • #19
                                      Can you report the person to Craigslist? Most forums can check IPs and can ban that person.

                                      I agree that if you try to make this formal it may finally shut this person up - at least to s significant degree. It's possible that even a ceast and desist type of letter from a lawyer could help, or even an investigative firm.

                                      If this person is hurting your business, you have every right to make them stop.


                                      • #20
                                        Having been through quite a bit myself...first off, let me tell you, the get a lawyer, have the police do this or that is really all and well on tv shows.
                                        real life, the good people lose, and the jerks win.

                                        Ok, that said.
                                        Do consult with a lawyer about filing an injunction for her to stop this behavior. Only problem is, then she breaks the restraining order, and you go back to court, and the cycle continues. But, for reasonable people, that might be enough to get them to stop. But it is not a guarrantee.

                                        Check your state's stalking laws. In my state, its if someone bothers you after you request they cease. The police may be able to do something about that.

                                        I agree to go to websites other than craig's list or is there a way to let craigslist people know about this situation.
                                        Also, don't use your address, have it go thru them to you which I always do anyhow. How does she find out who your inquiries are coming from anyhow?

                                        When I advertize on craigslist, inquiries come to me...and they don't know my email until I send an email back to them. so that part I am a bit confused about.
                                        save lives...spay/neuter/geld