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Boarding situation gone nuts

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  • #21
    OP, lots of barn help these days unfortunately makes poor decisions and lacks the competency to lead horses that better handlers would have zero issues with.

    That said, your decision to evidently be the biggest POSSIBLE a-hole, vent extensively, and then keep coming after her by posting her blog here (apparently to rally all of us into ragging on her as well...?), as well as your complete lack of compassion or even basic human understanding or kindness is astonishing even to me and **believe me** I have seen some assholery.

    For some reason it's not possible for you to just quietly be like, "Terrible that this happened and diasppointing that this barn can't handle an otherwise easy horse" BUT ALSO just help out where you can, send her a get well gift package and find somewhere else gracefully without this ridiculous public performance???

    I'd encourage you to examine your core values but based on experiences with your type I don't think it's even possible for you to comprehend what's the matter with your behavior here. I can just picture you reading this with your eyes wide and jaw agape spluttering to yourself, "But what have **I** done that is **remotely wrong** here??"

    People like you are why I quit training for other people.
    The Noodlehttp://tiny.cc/NGKmT&http://tiny.cc/gioSA
    Boy Wonderhttp://tiny.cc/G9290
    The Hana is nuts! NUTS!!http://tinyurl.com/SOCRAZY


    • #22
      I just returned to this thread, and have read the blog.

      OP, I do not understand why this blog has caused you distress. The blog describes the personal journey of an individual through a traumatic and life altering event. You and your horse are not blamed, identified, or described. Please stop trying to make this a poor me thread, it is not about you.

      I continue to sense that the incident would not have taken place had better handling practices been in place. I continue to believe that the individual is now frightened to handle your horse... I would be! You as well would be frightened had you suffered these injuries!

      Move your horse, send a fruit basket and a nice note wishing a speedy recovery, and most of all..........stop talking.
      Last edited by paintedpony; Jan. 11, 2019, 10:52 AM. Reason: punctuation


      • #23
        I don't really mean to pile on, but this line in the OP, which I missed on initially reading it, astonishes me:

        Immediately after the accident she got up, texted everyone that this other gelding, let's say named S trampled her and asked for help. She went to the hospital yadayada and got out 2 days later.

        Two days in the hospital is NOT 'yada yada'.

        It is abundantly clear that the person who is 'victimizing' themselves is not the woman who spent two days in the hospital.


        • #24
          Originally posted by ebott2015 View Post
          (...) One month later the manager was bringing in 3 horses at once, including two other geldings and my guy, my guy spooks sideways, the other horses spook after him, and then one ran her over and basically trampled her. She came out alive with no lasting damages, but did have some pretty bruised organs, some broken spinal processes(but allowed to use her back), and a cracked jaw. (...)
          And there may be lasting damages. My dad had a broken spinous process which caused pain for YEARS and he eventually needed spinal fusion to relieve the pain.

          Founding Member: Spotted Saddlebred Pals Clique


          • #25
            It’s unfortunate that you had to scramble to move your horse on such short notice. That is stressful. That said, I would much rather have a BO that is willing to admit that she can’t handle your horse, than one who keeps trying while afraid/without the necessary skill set. She also might just plain not want to deal with a younger, spookier horse- and there isn’t anything wrong with that. It’s her barn and she can fill it however she chooses.

            It it sounds like this was a freak accident, but she was seriously injured. It wasn’t your fault, but your horse was the catalyst. It is logical and responsible for her to want to examine the situation, figure out what went wrong, and take measures to mitigate future risk. Inconvenient for you, but vastly more inconvenient for her, all things considered.

            I was once in a similar situation. No injury involved, but BO decided my horse was a liability and wanted him out. I’d never had an issue with him, nor had any previous (or subsequent) BOs. Doesn’t matter- something about him made her uncomfortable and it was her perogative to keep herself safe and comfortable at work. My horse was better off in a situation where no one was afraid of him. (FWIW, I took over his daily care during the interim while I made arrangements to move, while working and going to school full time, and without a cost break).
            Last edited by Equisis; Jan. 12, 2019, 10:58 PM. Reason: Typo


            • #26
              It doesn't really matter if it was your horse who physically ran her over or if it was one of the other two horses. It could easily have been any of the three and it was all sparked by your horse's behavior.

              I think she was unprofessional in how she's handled the aftermath and that she never should have been leading three horses at a time. She was likely leading 3 horses at a time out of complacency. It's easy to forget how dangerous horses can be. But her serious injuries may have made her realize she's not cut out for handling a horse like yours and she wasn't willing to outright tell everyone "I'm not competent enough and/or physically capable of handling a horse who isn't a total deadhead." Sometimes we don't see or are not willing to accept our own limitations and this accident may have been a wake up call for the BM. It sounds like a good thing that's she's asked you to leave for the safety and well being of your horse and the BM. It's unfortunate about the timing and all that but it sounds like it was ultimately necessary.

              If your horse is that spooky you don't want him at a facility like that. It would be an accident waiting to happen but the waiting is over.

              I also strongly agree with the above poster to avoid working off board at all costs. You want to be a customer and nothing more. I've dealt with some crazy BOs in the past only as a boarder. I couldn't imagine how much crazier they would have been had I also been their employee.


              • #27
                OP you've gotten a lot of terrific feedback. By your own account, your fellow was a nervous type and wasn't like the other horses who were older and/or laid back. If your boy is spooky, BO would have been safer leading him alone. I'm sure she will never make that mistake again (leading your horse with two others). And it isn't at all surprising she asked you to leave if your boy isn't fitting in.

                BO was hospitalized and lost time at work. Time will tell, but she may or may not have permanent serious injuries. If you walk away from this situation without financial damage or litigation, it would be a good outcome.


                • #28
                  Just looking forward, there are so many steps that can be taken to desensitize horses, I'd definitely do those with your horse. You may never get the spook totally out of him, but he'll be a lot more relaxed. I purchased a horse that had been obviously whipped during his initial training. He would lunge at men with his teeth bared in the barn as we had lower Dutch doors. One man refused to walk him. Pre-teens in his barn would push on his forehead (surprising him) while he was eating. Eventually my DH earned his trust as he did the feeding. I would take him to the arena when it was empty and let his loose. As he followed me, I would quickly bend over to pick up pine cones and throw them out of the arena. Initially that resulted in bolting, but he came back and we did it again over and over. No idea whether it was true or not, but I just envisioned a man reaching down for a whip and then using it in a vicious manner. Eventually, I walked under him, he would adjust his pace to mine, bow, etc. besides the riding part. He still had a few spooks, but it went drastically down. Every horse has the potential to be dangerous, we just have to do the best we can. Good luck! P.S. He was a favorite among the small kids.