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Update pg 100-Erin sends the thread over the Rainbow Bridge. It had a good life...

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  • Update pg 100-Erin sends the thread over the Rainbow Bridge. It had a good life...

    I am WritINg This undeR an AlTeR So This isN't ReallY Me.

    I am HaViNg ProBleMs WitH My 3 Yr Old AnD NeeD HeLP. I Bought HIm From a BiG NAme TrainEr For Only 35000.00. My TraiNer Is So Nice thAt He Let Me MakE thE ChecK Out To Him So I wOUldn't be BoTherED By The SellER. He Is AN 18 HanD Sabino GypSy VannER ColT. I wNt To Keep HIm A Colt So I Can Breed HIm, Becuz, He IS SABINO, After all.

    He Is A LittlE thin, But my Friend MJ says That He doesn't need MUch to Eat, Because ThAT woulD mAke Him HOt.

    I Took HIm To A ShoW anD When SchooLing Over JumPS He WOUld GEt So Fast My BasebAll Cap Would Fly Off MY HEAD. The TraNqs We Gave HIM dIDN't sEEm To DO AnyThing, and I kNow I had The twistEd Wire Snaffle anD draw reins AdjustEd cOrrEctly. I wOrked On RiDinG Him Deep To Get HiS AtteNtioN. TheN hE would Run OUT When my TrainEr Was PolinG him. In The CLAss, I DiDN'T eVEN plAce, EveN thouGH MY BNT Was rIght AT the GAte IN Plane view Of The JUdge That I slepT with THe Day BEFOre. He cOuLdN'T HaVe BeeN MAd BeCauSe I Made thEm Hold thE GatE opEn FoR One HouR WhIlE I WaItEd For My TrAInEr To FiNiSh ScHollIng OnE Of The HoRseS FoR AnOthEr AMmIe BefOre Her ClAss, CoulD He?

    My FriEnD tHat Is a lAwYer AnD LiVes on a LeAKy HouSeBoAt IN FLa, SaYs thAt BecAusE My 2nD Toe IS BiGgEr ThAn My BiG Toe,I ShoUlD HavE ReCeIved SpEcIal TreAtmENt AccOrdIng to The ADA, And BeeN AllOwed to Try thE cOurSE AgaIN. I ThInk I DiDn'T PlAce becaUse The NerVe BloCk On My HoRses tAil Was WeaRinG oFf And He SwiSHed IT ONce. I EveN Was aBlE To Get 4 StriDes IN A 6 Stride LIne, But My Horse WAs BAlAnCed WheN hE dId IT. My TraInEr SaYs I DiDn'T PlaCe BecAuSe It WAS an EQ ClAss And I ForGot To Purge The Day BEfOre tO KeeP My WeighT Down. Being HEaVy SHoulDn'T hAve MadE My Horse looK lAMe, ESpEcIallY AftEr GiviNg Him 5 GramS Of BUTE, So I DoN'T ThiNk That Is It.

    Can AnYonE HelP? But Don"t Tell Me WhaT tO Do BecAuse yOu DoN't KNoW My HorsE, AnD I DO.
    THAnkS!

    PS- I ThiNk I NeeD A NeW HoRse So If AnYonE Has a fRee 6 Yr Old WB THaT JumPs 3'6" ThaT MovEs A 10, AnD iS SounD and boMBpRoof, PleaSe Let me knOw. I AlSo Need New TS BreeChes Size 28,, AnD A Blue GraNd PriX JacKet Size 12. If Anyone coulD send Me sOme MonEy To Buy Hay For The 250 Horses I RESCued, That Would BE GReAT TOo! Thanks!

    PPS- EriN iS MeaN AnD pIckS On Me BecaUSe I Am From TexAS.

    PPPS- I am thinkIng Of MovIng To ATlAnta, So If AnyonE cAn GivE me A list Of TrainErs WitHin a 300 Mile Radius, And their Names, Social Security Numbers, Birthdates, riding ResUmes, Turnout Schedules, directioNs to their barns, and Cost OF boarding It Would Be Appreciated.
  • Original Poster

    #2
    I am WritINg This undeR an AlTeR So This isN't ReallY Me.

    I am HaViNg ProBleMs WitH My 3 Yr Old AnD NeeD HeLP. I Bought HIm From a BiG NAme TrainEr For Only 35000.00. My TraiNer Is So Nice thAt He Let Me MakE thE ChecK Out To Him So I wOUldn't be BoTherED By The SellER. He Is AN 18 HanD Sabino GypSy VannER ColT. I wNt To Keep HIm A Colt So I Can Breed HIm, Becuz, He IS SABINO, After all.

    He Is A LittlE thin, But my Friend MJ says That He doesn't need MUch to Eat, Because ThAT woulD mAke Him HOt.

    I Took HIm To A ShoW anD When SchooLing Over JumPS He WOUld GEt So Fast My BasebAll Cap Would Fly Off MY HEAD. The TraNqs We Gave HIM dIDN't sEEm To DO AnyThing, and I kNow I had The twistEd Wire Snaffle anD draw reins AdjustEd cOrrEctly. I wOrked On RiDinG Him Deep To Get HiS AtteNtioN. TheN hE would Run OUT When my TrainEr Was PolinG him. In The CLAss, I DiDN'T eVEN plAce, EveN thouGH MY BNT Was rIght AT the GAte IN Plane view Of The JUdge That I slepT with THe Day BEFOre. He cOuLdN'T HaVe BeeN MAd BeCauSe I Made thEm Hold thE GatE opEn FoR One HouR WhIlE I WaItEd For My TrAInEr To FiNiSh ScHollIng OnE Of The HoRseS FoR AnOthEr AMmIe BefOre Her ClAss, CoulD He?

    My FriEnD tHat Is a lAwYer AnD LiVes on a LeAKy HouSeBoAt IN FLa, SaYs thAt BecAusE My 2nD Toe IS BiGgEr ThAn My BiG Toe,I ShoUlD HavE ReCeIved SpEcIal TreAtmENt AccOrdIng to The ADA, And BeeN AllOwed to Try thE cOurSE AgaIN. I ThInk I DiDn'T PlAce becaUse The NerVe BloCk On My HoRses tAil Was WeaRinG oFf And He SwiSHed IT ONce. I EveN Was aBlE To Get 4 StriDes IN A 6 Stride LIne, But My Horse WAs BAlAnCed WheN hE dId IT. My TraInEr SaYs I DiDn'T PlaCe BecAuSe It WAS an EQ ClAss And I ForGot To Purge The Day BEfOre tO KeeP My WeighT Down. Being HEaVy SHoulDn'T hAve MadE My Horse looK lAMe, ESpEcIallY AftEr GiviNg Him 5 GramS Of BUTE, So I DoN'T ThiNk That Is It.

    Can AnYonE HelP? But Don"t Tell Me WhaT tO Do BecAuse yOu DoN't KNoW My HorsE, AnD I DO.
    THAnkS!

    PS- I ThiNk I NeeD A NeW HoRse So If AnYonE Has a fRee 6 Yr Old WB THaT JumPs 3'6" ThaT MovEs A 10, AnD iS SounD and boMBpRoof, PleaSe Let me knOw. I AlSo Need New TS BreeChes Size 28,, AnD A Blue GraNd PriX JacKet Size 12. If Anyone coulD send Me sOme MonEy To Buy Hay For The 250 Horses I RESCued, That Would BE GReAT TOo! Thanks!

    PPS- EriN iS MeaN AnD pIckS On Me BecaUSe I Am From TexAS.

    PPPS- I am thinkIng Of MovIng To ATlAnta, So If AnyonE cAn GivE me A list Of TrainErs WitHin a 300 Mile Radius, And their Names, Social Security Numbers, Birthdates, riding ResUmes, Turnout Schedules, directioNs to their barns, and Cost OF boarding It Would Be Appreciated.

    Comment


    • #3
      Jetsmom,
      You aren't getting jaded are you?

      We have both been here long enough to know that this BB runs in cycles and it is just going through a bad one right now!

      Please tell me we weren't like that back at Fox Hollow!

      Kristen

      Comment

      • Original Poster

        #4
        Hi Kristen! How Are you? PM Me and we'll chat.

        Comment


        • #5
          As a newbie, and a suck-up (redundancy is my middle name... and my last), let me just say that you damn well better warn me next time you're planning to do this, so I can be prepared with the Depends! Laughed so hard I nearly squirted like one of my ever-in-season mares! (Hope this latter reference doesn't offend...)

          Note to self: Kegels...
          "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give." - Churchill

          Comment


          • #6
            A warning would be great. I just spewed coffee all over my desk!!

            The sad thing is, I've read a lot of these on here lately. Must be the full moon.
            One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well. - Virginia Woolf

            Comment


            • #7
              *blink* I don't get it...
              Hell on Hooves

              Proud owner of the $300 pony!

              Comment


              • #8
                Jetsmom.....I think the problem was the saddle cause everything else you did was right on! Had to have been the saddle. Perhaps you need to have it reflocked or get a new one altogether. OR, it could have been the shoe job you had done prior to the show...you remember, where you put 00 on size 2 feet and forgot to add the trailers? I'm sure it was the saddle or lack of trailers!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  You need an animal communicator immediately!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I dont get it either, I must haev missed something....but ITS FUNNY!!! Thanks for making me laugh!!
                    Never Ride Faster Than Your Guardian Angel Can Fly
                    Way Back Texas~04/20/90-09/17/08
                    Green Alligator "Captain"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      It's just a spoof on the many threads here that are posted under alters. Nothing really to get, just funny.
                      One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well. - Virginia Woolf

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        egontoast....you owe me a jean washing!! Lordy, that was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too funny!


                        Be sure to add plenty of "bling" tack too!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          There is NOTHING wrong with your 3 year old. Just switch disciplines to dressage, train him in the rollkur method and try your forst GP test this weekend!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Well, when you get that new horse we'll all be more than happy to help you pick out a show name. And a barn name.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Sounds to me like the judge was just mad at you.
                              I would dye the horse chestnut next time you show under that judge. I'm sure your trainer can show you how.

                              ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!
                              Nina's Story
                              Epona Comm on FB

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                Lordy--that must have been PAINFUL to type. I hope it was worth it...

                                (ed. note--I think to be technically correct, you should NOT confess in the title that your post is long. After all, you're entitled. Entitlement includes verbosity. Even mangled, illegible verbosity.

                                Just a suggestion...)
                                "One person's cowboy is another person's blooming idiot" -- katarine

                                Spay and neuter. Please.

                                Comment


                                • #17


                                  Perhaps your horse was being chased by unsupervised drunk geese with foul breath.
                                  "There's something about the outside of a horse that is good for the inside of a man" ~ Sir Winston Churchill

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    You should have added BOSS, Vinegar and Paprika to his feed too!

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      Oh and dear lord, don't forget to put the panty hose on your head. Make sure they are the proper color of nude to match your horse!

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        You need to commit a public lewd act whilst riding DEEP.
                                        Seriously...do I have to be the only one who isn't afraid to type that out loud?????
                                        You jump in the saddle,
                                        Hold onto the bridle!
                                        Jump in the line!
                                        ...Belefonte

                                        Comment

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