The end is nigh. And I’ve got very mixed feelings about it all.

I just booked overnight accommodations, for both my horses, and myself for our drive home. We’re hitting the road in less than two weeks, which means I’ve got less than two weeks to make as much progress as possible.

I must confess I’m a little down. I had hoped to be so much further towards my goals with both horses. I’d hoped Midge would be approaching his first I-2; instead, I think that showing this year at all might be a stretch. And not because he’s naughty or doing anything wrong, it just takes SO long to get strong to get ready—really ready, the kind of ready that gets big scores, not just executes the movements for a string of acceptable scores—for that level.

I’d also hoped that I would have taken Ella to her first show at Grand Prix, but that didn’t happen either, for pretty much the same reason. For her it comes down just to the piaffe and passage, which she can DO, she just can’t easily CONNECT. And that’s on me, though admittedly she’s not the easiest, as she’s so dang powerful behind. She’s the first horse I’ve ever had who could both piaffe AND passage: Billy had a wonderful, expressive passage but never really piaffed; Cleo was the opposite—pretty talented for piaffe but didn’t get a handle on the passage before her injury.

And since I can count the number of rides I’ve had on finished Grand Prix horses on one hand, I’ve had to learn by doing, and that’s not so easy. I certainly could do a Grand Prix test now, but I don’t want to just get 6s on the transitions and run the risk of 5s if the sun, moon and stars don’t align. I want the 7s, 8s and—maybe someday—9s I think she can get.

I’m thisclose; I just had a “meeting” with Michael to talk about my plans for the year, and we agreed that I’ll be showing her Grand Prix by July. But because I’m still basically an impatient teenager, I wanted to have it done by Florida. Wah wah wah.

Fender, too, is a little short of what I’d dreamed of doing, but with him I’m far less stressed about it.  The 5-year-old tests probably won’t happen for him this year. He’s absolutely the quality of horse, with the quality of gaits that would score brilliantly at that level but he doesn’t yet have the quality of balance and self-carriage. Ever walked in shoes four sizes too big? That’s what Fender still feels like to sit on—he’s beautiful and graceful and powerful, but dang, he is EVERYWHERE. His show schedule will probably look a lot like Ella’s, his debut for the year to be somewhere around July, at first level.

The highlight of my Florida trip has been Tres’ progress. Of course, I would have loved to get him sold—and I cannot understand what the people who passed him up were thinking, because he was just PERFECT for all of them, exactly what they needed, though heaven knows you can’t tell people what they need. But he’s going home with a full line of one-tempis, a much better canter pirouette and a way better developed piaffe and passage. He’s gotten so dang fun that we’re going to pull him off the market for a while so I can show him in the small tour, maybe even some I2s by fall. How fun would that be, three horses at the Grand Prix level?!

So that’s certainly something to look forward to for my return to the North… or at least, more north than my present location. And there’s more to be excited about. I’ve just returned from my last trip home to clinic, and it had been a month since I’d seen my riders. They’ve all made such progress! And it’s been so long since I taught I’d almost forgotten how much I love it. I’m eager to get home and get back to work.

So it’s nine days and counting, and I am counting. Though it was 35* my last morning in Virginia, as opposed to 65* in Florida. I’m not so eager to make that switch just yet!