Blogger Alex Ambelang’s look back on her 2015—her first year as a professional groom for four-star eventer Colleen Rutledge—continues here. You can read Trial By Fire: Part 1 here. 

Welcome to England… just kidding—Germany. You will be mostly unprepared for your first international equine travel experience and your first team experience. Don’t let the fear and anxiety take hold.

Breathe. Take in all that is around you. Relish in the fact that you are here.

Take the brutal lesson in humility in stride and accept that the best-laid plans fall down in mid flight. Aachen was a week of lessons learned. Lessons in international lorry and ferry travel. Lessons in extreme jet lag for horse and human. At the end of the day, C.R. was not on his “A” game from his first international travel outing to Aachen.

But we learned. We learned how to manage him in those conditions for future scenarios and we learned how to better prepare for something like it again. It is easy to get stuck on the negative in this situation because there was a lot of it but I look back on it and think what an absolutely incredible experience it was from start to finish—good, bad and all the rest in between.

It all ended with a flat lorry tire, crashing (and ending) a village party and some high quality car camping. What more can one ask for from one trip?

In the lorry with C.R., killing time with some selfies.

Welcome (back) to England. It’s tough to return in defeat. We had already felt the need to go back to square one after Millbrook but we had been vanquished to square zero.

It would be easy to panic with the big dance (Burghley CCI****) coming up in a few short weeks. In between shopping trips and shenanigans to keep ourselves occupied, time was spent hand gluing each piece back together—inspecting each one thoroughly and building horse and rider (and groom) back up.

Like Aiken (in a way), these were the moment where the resolve to keep going was tested. It would be easy to call it quits and try again another year, but we were there to finish the job.

Welcome to Burghley. Your caravan will be cold. Close your eyes and breathe (or not) as the center line gate closes and the start box is left and know that horse and rider have deserve to be here.

Let the tears fall after show jumping and let the overwhelming grief and joy from months and months overcome you in that moment. Absorb the wonder in all that has happened and all that is to come. Burghley was probably the most incredible experience thus far.

How could it not be? It’s Burghley.

It’s a feeling I have a hard time describing. We were there to get shit done. We had a lot to prove. There will always be the should haves, would haves and could haves at every event—a better dressage score, less time on cross country, blah, blah. But the weekend encompassed everything the sport is. I watched Michael Jung lay down another beautiful test but also saw him get tossed into the water—how does that even happen? I saw incredible saves and broken hearts that came back from cross-country.

I saw my boy go out on course a wide-eyed, unsure toddler and watched him come back a more well educated man. And I stood ringside to see him jump double clear in his second four-star and prove the hard work we had done paid off. It’s all of life’s tough lessons wrapped up in five days in September in England. How crazy and amazing is that?

Walking with Colleen and C.R. to the Burghley start-box.

Welcome to Plantation. Your greatest fears will come to light. Face the despair and gratitude that things could have been worse. Erase the board and start back at square one—what went wrong? A million possibilities and a million questions unanswered.

That weekend can also be entitled “How not to start your fall season stateside.” Falls happen. Two falls in one weekend just hours apart? Not as often.

I have been blessed in not seeing many serious falls in my time in the sport. While Colleen’s departures from the tack were not what most would call serious, it still shook me up. It was a very stark reminder of the risk we all take getting in the tack each day. These falls also remind us of how much worse it could have been. Both horses were fine as was Colleen. There are many more that cannot say the same. It was a big serving of reality.

Welcome to Morven. Is is possible that the weather is worse than eventing in Montana? Holding your breath will not produce a better dressage test, but mud and sludge will. (Good boy, Monkey). Hope for good footing to run. Be thankful for waterproof coats and boots and heated truck seats.

Morven was probably the biggest mess I have encountered thus far. The weather was much less than ideal and so much was up in the air at any one time. It served as a confidence builder for our two boys that were at Plantation and as a reboot before Fair Hill. I hope to return to Morven on a more pleasant weekend.

Welcome to Fair Hill. The culmination of the fall season. It seems that the entire event is remembered for me in snapshots rather than complete memories. Busy Wednesday with two-star and three-star horses to jog and horses to exercise. Throw a Young Event horse into the mix as well.

Disappointing dressage scores. Playing the waiting game on a long Saturday. Being thankful for horses home safe and sound. Brief but meaningful catch-up sessions with old friends. A long, long Sunday from jogs to pulling in the driveway home.

I tend to enjoy the events with fewer divisions more as it means fewer horses for me (generally speaking) which means I can watch more and take more in. I never get bored of watching how others run their programs inside and outside the barn and seeing all of these top notch professionals at work right along side the first timers.

I lucked out in having a rare FHI weekend with good weather. While not many ribbons came home, all three of the boys came home with a plethora of experience.

Welcome back to Virginia. Virginia has become one of my more well-liked events, mostly for its beautiful setting. It too reminds me of home. Though cold this time of year, the changing leaves and the warm, low fall sun make for beautiful days.

The final show of the season found us with five horses from beginner novice through the one-star level. Again—not a weekend full of ribbons or accolades but a weekend where each horse showed great improvement in their performances and brought in hope and excitement for 2016. I love seeing the babies succeed just as much as I do the big horses. It reminds me how important the process is and how different it can be for each horse.

And now we find ourselves in the week of Thanksgiving. Plans for 2016 are already setting into motion and I know the next six weeks will fly by before the great migration south.

How busy, stressful, joyful, disappointing and amazing this year has been. The situation does not look quite like I imagined when I began to pursue this dream but I don’t think I would take it any other way. The person I see in the mirror is not quite who I remember but I think I am learning to like her just the same. Quieter, calmer, more educated and lighter (in body).

Many a philosopher have wondered what a soul might weigh. The answer? Forty pounds—to be precise. But more on that later. Wishing you all happiness health and light in this holiday season. Cheers to a few quiet weeks before the madness starts all over again.

Alex Ambelang works as a groom for four-star eventer Colleen Rutledge and spent 2015 traveling with Rutledge’s three- and four-star horses. Alex grew up in Montana and achieved her HA rating with the U.S. Pony Clubs as well as eventing to the preliminary level. She graduated in 2014 with a Bachelor of Arts in Cultural and Medical Anthropology from the University of Montana. Then, in early 2015, she took the job with Rutledge. 

You can read Alex’s introductory blog here and all of her blogs here.