I admit it. I’ve got the pony loving affliction-addiction. Gimme all the teeny, typey, dishy heads. 

Luckily, I have five kiddos to fulfill my pony dreams, and we own our own little barn. My vision has always been to bring along green ponies in my backyard. When I shared my dream with horse friends, they looked at me like I sprouted a second head. 

Their emphatic “Hells no!” responses certainly caused some self-doubt, but alas, my desire for a young pony was rooted deep. 

I had brought along youngsters before, and I loved the process. I wanted my family to experience the same joy. That was 10-plus years ago when my bones were still rubbery, and my abs and patience still intact. Did I still have the pony breaking mojo?

“Project Unbroke Pony” presented other benefits though. I could justify my purchase as an “investment” to my no-more-horses husband. Plus, a young pony is relatively affordable to purchase. 

The clincher? I’m 5’1″ in uncomfortable heels. I’m highly motivated by the free childcare offered at the YMCA to stay fit. I’m not a pony-crusher. 

My pony plans seem less crazy already, right?

So I did it! I bought an adorable small mare, a blingy bay half-Welsh we named Wish who will turn 3 in June. Wish wasn’t an impulse buy driven by the cuteness factor. Bringing her along is a meaningful family project.

Though we’re only three months in, I’m teaching my kids valuable things. I’m also remembering valuable things I’ve forgotten, such as…

Patience Is A Virtue 

My hubs and I were recently talking old-school-style about how everything today is immediate. You want toilet paper, Amazon has it on your stoop in time for your next wipe. You want to know where cotton candy was invented, Google it. You need to write a love letter, ChatGPT it.

Bringing home a baby versus a packer pushes back against the “I have to have it now” mentality. There’s no immediate reward. I explain that everything must be done slowly. If we rush bridling for the first time, Wish may develop a forever quirk. If we’re hasty putting on blankets, she might believe crinkly fabric will eat her. Wish is an exercise in taking things step by step, the correct way versus the easy way. 

Learning Is Active

When my oldest started at a lesson barn, one of the first things the instructor said was, “Don’t run up behind a horse.” Often lesson ponies are saints who tolerate kids’ mishaps. If my kids run up behind our 2-year-old, she may break the crossties, spook-scoot and bolt. When I say, “Don’t run in the barn,” for the hundredth time, my children stop. They’ve seen the ramifications.

They’re also learning neat young horse things. They got to see the vet yank Wish’s wolf teeth. 

“Look at those tiny teeth,” my 4-year old marveled when the vet presented them in her palm like little jewels. 

We also observed the vet wrestle the pony for a blood sample. The kids crowded around to learn how to administer meds orally to a squirmy youngster. Bonus! Our awesome vet blew up rectal sleeves balloon-style as souvenirs. Super cool stuff! 

Pride Is A Good Feeling 

Daily, the kids watched me rub Wish all over her body. They watched me jump up and down beside her looking silly, pressing on her back. They watched when I first climbed the mounting block and slithered on bareback with a halter and lead ropes for reins. They giggled as I sat on her back, letting her nibble treats out of my hands and play with the toes of my boots. 

Everyone watched as I graduated to walking bareback, my teenager leading me carefully around the paddock.  “Like that, mom?” she asked, urging the pony to navigate my weight and walk forward. Success!  

We’re all proud of putting in the work and of our victories.

Little Things Matter

What I love most about green ones is that goals can be small and attainable. We waited in anticipation, tightening the girth that first time. We longed Wish under tack for the first time. When she willingly accepted the cold, rubber thing in her mouth and the hunk of leather on her back, the kids did the happy dance. 

Working with Wish isn’t about perfection, it’s about process. If she sits for a few weeks because the fields are mud pits, it’s no biggie. We don’t stress. Our family still enjoys cuddling her in her stall or working on desensitizing her to new things and seeing her come along in other important ways. 

They understand each of these moments are wins. 

Heart And Mind Are Crucial 

A pony with a big heart and good mind is irreplaceable. I’ve made all the mistakes. I’ve picked the fancy mover with the quirks. I’ve fallen for the regal warmblood who’s a dork to ride. 

I hope to save the kids the same heartbreak if they continue riding into adulthood. (And I want them to remember the importance of a big heart and a good mind applies to humans as well, if their father ever allows them to date.)

Wish is a particularly in-your-pocket pony. She’d rather be with humans than her species. When the kids approach the fence, she gallops over, “Pet me! Pet me!” She’s smart in a good way, not the I’ve-got-pony-tricks-up-my-sleeve way. She’s the type that’ll do anything once you earn her trust. The kids witness her disposition firsthand and comprehend the value of a great personality. They love all the fuzzy pony hugs and kisses. 

Quiet Counts 

Every day we’re over stimulated: video games, social media and after-school activities create a constant buzz. The world is whizzing by. Against that, the process of bringing along Wish is a quiet one. When the kids are wound up, the pony feeds off their frenetic energy. We use our “inside voices” around Wish. When she has a baby moment, the kids stay calm and silent rather than panic. 

Even my boisterous son coos sweet nothings in Wish’s ear when he grooms. We’re all learning how to relish the quiet with her.

Memories Matter

I know I’m more present when we’re down at the barn together with Wish. I put the phone-scrolling aside and enjoy all the firsts we’re experiencing. The kids are completely immersed in the process. 

I’m keeping a “Wish Diary” to track our progress with dates and milestones, so we can reflect on this experience.

My hope is that as adults, my children will reflect on our pony project as an act of togetherness and love—not only of our love of horses, but of my love for them. 

So am I crazy? Of course, I am. I’m a horse person! Aren’t we all, in the best possible way? I’m watching my five children grow and learn alongside a young pony. That’s the greatest kind of crazy there is.  

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Jamie Sindell has an MFA in creative writing from the University of Arizona and has ridden and owned hunters on and off throughout her life. She is a mom of five kids, ages 2, 3, 6, 10 and 13. She and her family reside at Wish List Farm, where her horse-crazy girls play with their small pony, Cupcake, and her son and husband play with the tractor.