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  1. #21
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    Jul. 7, 2013
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    I had a sibling do this. As a very comfortable atheist it was very frustrating. Especially the bibles on my birthday. I kept in mind though that the reason sibling was sharing was because they had found comfort for easing past pain and trauma. They just wanted to share that. It made it easier to bite my tongue.

    Fast forward several years and sibling has calmed down and mostly gone back to normal. Hopefully your patience will pay off and you will get your friend back soon.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  2. #22
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    Jan. 4, 2007
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    TX
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    What seems puzzling is that we grow out of believing in the tooth fairy, Santa Claus coming down chimneys, but not out of believing equally wild figments of someone's imagination as gods of all kinds and their mythologies.

    You would think that, once we learn to differentiate between what is real and what is fantasy, we would be able to apply that reasoning to all around us.


    27 members found this post helpful.

  3. #23
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    Jan. 16, 2003
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    Tennessee
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    I have one, and over the years she has not gotten any better. When she referred to herself as "Woman of God" I realized she was happy and fulfilled, and I just moved on.
    It's 2015. Do you know where your old horse is?



  4. #24
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    Oct. 7, 2006
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    on and off the bit
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jhein12 View Post
    A friend of a friend. She suddenly started posting all of this bible stuff on Facebook and thanking God for every little thing that happened good in her day. When her grandmother died she said "Well at least heaven has another angel now!". I met her a few times before she was this way. She was a drinking, smoking, bad girl. Now she is a different person altogether!
    It's odd that a born again Christian would believe people become angels when they die!

    Wish more of my friends were born again ...
    Founder of the People Who Prefer COTH Over FB Clique
    People Who Hate to Rush to Kill Wildlife Clique!
    "I Sing Silly Songs to My Animals!" Clique


    2 members found this post helpful.

  5. #25
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    Jun. 24, 2005
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    Alabama
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    10,727

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    Remember the Darryl Hannah character in Steel Magnolias? She was one of the fanatics, and it was amazing to see the other characters react to her.
    You can't fix stupid-Ron White


    1 members found this post helpful.

  6. #26
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    Sep. 2, 2008
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    Greeley, Colorado
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    I have no issue with the devoutly religious so long as they don't try to force it upon others. As an atheist, from an atheist family, living in the south I was subject to a constant barrage of this from friends families, teachers (at public school!), and later from "friends".

    I tried to keep my distance without telling them flat out. But then again I'm painfully non confrontational.
    **Friend of bar.ka**

    Fils Du Reverdy (Revy)- 1993 Selle Francais Gelding
    My equine soulmate


    4 members found this post helpful.

  7. #27
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    Jul. 14, 2011
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    Warren County, NJ
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    I think it's their mission to convert others. I dated someone who was very religious and our dates consisted of going to church mostly. Being preached to, tested and quoted at was just too much for me, as much as I liked the guy.

    Apparently being a good, caring and considerate person isn't good enough; you have to be opinionated, closed-minded and lose all common sense in order to be loved by G*d.


    11 members found this post helpful.

  8. #28
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    Jan. 20, 2008
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    647

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    I had this a lot when I lived in AL and was around a huge number of southern baptists. At first I tried to ignore it. Then I started to get sick of it so I'd spin it right back on them by saying it wasn't very Christian like to push beliefs or to tell me my religion was wrong. (Catholic.) They'd try to argue but I'd tell them that they way they are approaching the topic and talking about their beliefs was coming off as judgmental of those who were different. It usually ended in us not being friends because they didn't like that. There were a few who understood my point and left the religion topic off the table and we remained friends.

    I am glad that those who are born again are happy and believe they have reached a wonderful place in life. However, I don't need anyone telling me how to live my life and spouting the bible at me in a way that makes me look like I live in sin all the time. Just my opinion.


    5 members found this post helpful.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Dec. 4, 2005
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    washington state
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    10,142

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    I'm recently "born again" (5 years ago now) and have never felt the need to go around trying to get my pals all churched up. The change has been a big one for me personally so of course my closest pals asked and I answered. The decision to be a Christian tends to be between that person and God so while it is always good to be able to answer questions, etc., if they come up pushing ideas generally won't get a good response.

    The one thing that has changed is one of my best buddies now has another subject for his lame-o old school jokes. He now says to me frequently, "Ya know, Twotru, I know Jesus saves... but where does He shop??"

    Ba dum dum. It was funny the first few times pphhhlllt. He also enjoys making fun things out of the word "Hebrews". Whaddaya do
    The Knotted Pony

    Proud and upstanding member of the Snort and Blow Clique.


    5 members found this post helpful.

  10. #30
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    Feb. 4, 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by JBD View Post
    It's not uncommon for someone who has been very much into drinking, drugs, promiscuity or their vice of choice to be equally "all in" when they find Jesus. Their basic nature is to be extreme.
    "Is your brother on a church kick
    Seems like just a different kind of dope sick
    Better off to teach a dog a card trick
    Than try to have a point and make it clear"

    Jason Isbell


    5 members found this post helpful.

  11. #31
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    Mar. 13, 2013
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    The Pacific NW
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    My sister about 8 years ago, it took about 3 years for her to ease back from being a zealot. She still a believer now, but much more tolerant than after she was first "turned"... We had to agree that certain things were just off limits (such as Harry Potter-WTF?!?!?). Anyhow, she's pretty much back to mellow now, but you'll need to sign up for some patience classes and have a few martinis to get through the first year! Good luck


    3 members found this post helpful.

  12. #32
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    Feb. 5, 2010
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    The people I've known who were "born again" all had something in common--not so great childhoods/families. It made me wonder if a lot of the church/religious stuff filled some sort of a hole in them. Like they finally had a guide, a community, a sense of belonging.

    Makes me appreciate my family. I don't have any need for organized religion because I already have everything I need, both inside myself from my upbringing, and externally from my family members.

    Just an observation and opinion.
    Topline Leather -- Bespoke, handwoven browbands & accessories customized with Swarovski crystals, gemstones, & glass seed beads. The original crystal braid & crystal spike browbands!


    6 members found this post helpful.

  13. #33
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    Feb. 5, 2010
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    Quote Originally Posted by BITSA View Post
    We had to agree that certain things were just off limits (such as Harry Potter-WTF?!?!?).
    I am always amused (and confused!) when religious people are anti-Harry Potter, especially since he is SUCH a Christ figure.
    Topline Leather -- Bespoke, handwoven browbands & accessories customized with Swarovski crystals, gemstones, & glass seed beads. The original crystal braid & crystal spike browbands!


    4 members found this post helpful.

  14. #34
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    Jan. 28, 2003
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    Hollywood, but not the one where they have the Oscars!
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    8,331

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    Addictive personalities often replace one obsession with another.
    "You can't really debate with someone who has a prescient invisible friend"
    carolprudm


    6 members found this post helpful.

  15. #35
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    Jan. 4, 2007
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    TX
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    Quote Originally Posted by mroades View Post
    Addictive personalities often replace one obsession with another.
    That the same brain structures are active in religious thoughts and during the effects of some drugs is supported by brain imaging studies showing that the same areas of the brain light up when the very religious think about their religion than when someone is under certain mind altering drugs.

    Lets remember that in societies with access to mind altering drugs, some of those have been used to achieve communal bliss and/or "visions" ceremonially, that is well documented.

    Both, certain drugs and religious raptures hit the same area of the brain in similar ways, to give intense pleasure over what we normally get with most other we may be passionate about, for many of us here horses.

    That as of now are ongoing studies, don't really know enough to say more than that does happen, will have to wait to see if there is more to it, any significance other than happenstance.

    My guess, if someone's brain is wired for that, it is understandable that they at one time or another find religion thru those, to them, so easily available same pleasure paths and become so, lets say, "intense" about the rightness of their faith, because it is indeed that real to them, while not to others not wired thru those circuits.

    Now, we know there is way more than just that, but such could be a reinforcing mechanism why some seem to go off the deep end with their faith, since as you say, they are working on already well established obsessive mental processes.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  16. #36
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    Jan. 23, 2006
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    Constant State of Delusion
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    Quote Originally Posted by pony baloney View Post
    I think it's their mission to convert others. I dated someone who was very religious and our dates consisted of going to church mostly. Being preached to, tested and quoted at was just too much for me, as much as I liked the guy.

    This was certainly true in the case of my mom. She met a woman at work years ago who witnessed to her and invited her to church. Eventually, my mother accepted Christ as her Lord and Savior; got saved, baptized, the whole 9.

    Then my sister and I started having to go to Sunday school. From day one, it was drilled into all of our heads that our jobs as Christians, especially BORN AGAIN Christians; was to witness to anyone and everyone we came in contact with, and try to get them "saved" so that they would be allowed to go to heaven (we were with a non-denominational church, if that matters)...

    My mom started sending out these weird 'tracts' with the yearly Christmas cards... the tracts being these tiny booklets that were written like comic books, and told short, theoretical stories about people who did "un-Christianlike things" and the punishments God handed down to them. The tract that sticks out in my mind the most is the one about an adolescent girl who was talked into having sex with an older man, and ended up contracting AIDS from him because she had sex before she was married.

    Our relatives started mailing the tracts AND the Christmas cards back to my mom! This, of course, made me laugh my ass off; but she would get so angry and so offended that they wouldn't convert/become born again/get saved/whatever, it was like she was brainwashed.

    Quote Originally Posted by pony baloney View Post
    Apparently being a good, caring and considerate person isn't good enough; you have to be opinionated, closed-minded and lose all common sense in order to be loved by G*d.
    And this, too, was true; at least according to the church... "good deeds won't get you into heaven- only being saved will allow you eternal life beyond the pearly gates...."

    You hit the nail on the head about having to be an opinionated (but only the opinions the church tells you to have), close-minded, common sense-less droid, in order for God to love you. He hates everyone else. It's true, you can ask anyone from that church, they'll all tell you the same thing.

    At any rate, she's calmed down with the "witnessing" and thank heavens- she doesn't send those damned tracts out anymore... to be honest it was totally humiliating. Every year around Christmastime, my sister and I would sit there watching her stuff the card envelopes like *facepalm*... there was no stopping her!
    Quote Originally Posted by Martha Drum View Post
    ...But I don't want to sit helmetless on my horse while he lies on the ground kicking a ball around without a bridle while Leatherface does an interpretive dance with his chainsaw around us.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  17. #37
    Join Date
    Jan. 4, 2007
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    TX
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReeseTheBeast View Post
    This was certainly true in the case of my mom. She met a woman at work years ago who witnessed to her and invited her to church. Eventually, my mother accepted Christ as her Lord and Savior; got saved, baptized, the whole 9.

    Then my sister and I started having to go to Sunday school. From day one, it was drilled into all of our heads that our jobs as Christians, especially BORN AGAIN Christians; was to witness to anyone and everyone we came in contact with, and try to get them "saved" so that they would be allowed to go to heaven (we were with a non-denominational church, if that matters)...

    My mom started sending out these weird 'tracts' with the yearly Christmas cards... the tracts being these tiny booklets that were written like comic books, and told short, theoretical stories about people who did "un-Christianlike things" and the punishments God handed down to them. The tract that sticks out in my mind the most is the one about an adolescent girl who was talked into having sex with an older man, and ended up contracting AIDS from him because she had sex before she was married.

    Our relatives started mailing the tracts AND the Christmas cards back to my mom! This, of course, made me laugh my ass off; but she would get so angry and so offended that they wouldn't convert/become born again/get saved/whatever, it was like she was brainwashed.



    And this, too, was true; at least according to the church... "good deeds won't get you into heaven- only being saved will allow you eternal life beyond the pearly gates...."

    You hit the nail on the head about having to be an opinionated (but only the opinions the church tells you to have), close-minded, common sense-less droid, in order for God to love you. He hates everyone else. It's true, you can ask anyone from that church, they'll all tell you the same thing.

    At any rate, she's calmed down with the "witnessing" and thank heavens- she doesn't send those damned tracts out anymore... to be honest it was totally humiliating. Every year around Christmastime, my sister and I would sit there watching her stuff the card envelopes like *facepalm*... there was no stopping her!
    My impression of very religious people, they are working mentally in very narrow paths, the only way they can keep focused on believing all that stuff.

    If they open their mind and look around they surely will see that the world is about so much more than that their narrow path permits them to work thru.

    That is why they can make second citizens of any one not a believer of the faith as they think it ought to be, or deny individual rights to others.
    That is the sad part, how inclusive those people think they are and how so narrow and exclusive they are looking at it from the outside.


    8 members found this post helpful.

  18. #38
    Join Date
    Aug. 2, 2004
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    Whidbey Is, Wash.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frizzle View Post
    The people I've known who were "born again" all had something in common--not so great childhoods/families. It made me wonder if a lot of the church/religious stuff filled some sort of a hole in them. Like they finally had a guide, a community, a sense of belonging.
    Studies show that's the same reason folks join street gangs also...

    Thankfully no one born again in my life. My mother went through religious kicks about every six years; church, swearing off swearing , the Lord this-n-that, blaaaaaaahhhhhh... Would last a month or so, then she'd be off again. Towards the end of our relationship, she would post on FB about finding god on a trail ride, or "handing the reins" to god on a horse coming into the rescue, etc etc, . It bothered me only because I knew how fakey-fake it was, plus she was the most unethical person I had ever met. I couldn't help but poke the bear once. She had a very nice horse that was ruined by leasers, whole 'nother story, turned into a spooking bucking mess. Her h/j trainer was bucked off and hurt, and refused to get back on him. DH and I visited, prior to DH being DH, and he got on the horse every day for about seven or eight days, culminating in a three hour long trail ride we all went on. He was clearly a horse who had been frightened at some point, needed confidence from his rider, and never got it. We leave, horse gets put back a program.

    A few months later she posts about taking him on a trail ride and how great he was, and how it was proof of all the wonders of handing the reins to god. I responded and said "look DH, you were right, you are god!"
    COTH's official mini-donk enabler

    "I am all for reaching out, but in some situations it needs to be done with a rolled up news paper." Alagirl


    4 members found this post helpful.

  19. #39
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    Apr. 20, 2011
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    816

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    my BIL found Jesus in jail. while I am what I consider a fallen down Catholic (meaning I don't go to church) some of the stuff he writes to my husband and some of the hi lited pages he sends makes me wonder just what Bible he's reading/quoting.

    He actually "earned" a new bible somehow, and had it personalized and sent to my husband so that he (hubs) would see the light.

    which would all be fine, except he has never acknowledged full responsibility for what he is in jail for, and some of the letters he writes are threatening physically and financially to both hubs and me, mostly me, because he believes (now that he's saved) that I should submit more to my husband's "rule" and if my husband doesn't enforce it then he's a sinner . ugh.

    the last letter we got, he insists that when he's out of jail and allowed, he's going to come here and "instruct" until we see the light and accept Jesus as he has. good luck to him.



  20. #40
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    Oct. 30, 2013
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    My sister and brother in law went through this years ago. It didn't really affect me much until after my husband left. They offered me a free "40 Days of Purpose" book through their church's program then said I had to go to the kick-off service but didn't have to participate after that. I figured "what the hell" and went. I had been to their church a few times before for Christmas functions and found it pretty hard-core. When I went that time, she started introducing me to people, showing me the nursery, etc., as if I was about to become a new member. A few days later she sent an email with "well, what did you think?"

    I didn't want to offend her but wanted to make it clear it wasn't for me. I wrote something like:

    Thank you for sharing something that's such an important part of your life with me, however, I don't think it's the right situation for my son and I at this time".

    She backed right off and everything has been fine since (it's been about 10 years).



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