I'm kind of astounded that people think that distant (aka not siblings/parents) relatives are EXPECTED to remember every birthday, holiday, etc. and cough up gifts for every kid in the extended family. Seems rather unreasonable expectations. If they want to do that, fine, but EXPECTING it?
That is my thought, I am the youngest in a family of 8. All my sisters and brother have 3-4 kids and then some of them have kids. I would be in the poor house if I had to send gifts and cards to all of them.
It was never expected in my family, only one aunt sent me cards when I was a kid. My one grandma only sent me a Christmas gift and it was slippers with a $5. bill in them each year. I would never think that she didn't love me enough, because she didn't send me things.
My mom is 85 yrs old and she has 23 grand kids, 22 great grand kids. She lives on a pension and I don't know how she still sends cards to everyone.
My life motto now is "You can't fix stupid!"
Are you going to cowboy up, or lie there and bleed