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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep. 3, 2010
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    Default Do I want a free horse?

    I have a friend who says she wants to get out of horses. Shes selling her trailer and rehoming horses. She has one horse that Ive always liked and she said if I want him I can have him because she knows where he will be and that its a good home.

    Now, problem is........Im worried this is a midlife crisis and a month from now, or next spring when everyone is showing and riding and stuff, shes going to want him back, after Ive put some training into him (hes been a pasture puff), feed him thru the winter, etc. PLUS getting attached to him!

    Anyone ever run into a situation like this??? I could lose a friend if she does say "I made a mistake I want him back and since I GAVE him to you, you should give him back!" Not sure what to do.....
    Thanks



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr. 14, 2007
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    Pen Argyl PA
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    Default

    just ask her if she will sign a contract and that she won't ask for him back. Tell her that is the only way you can take him without getting your heart broken.


    17 members found this post helpful.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul. 18, 2008
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    Ohio, USA
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    Default

    IF she says, "Hey, I want him back!" and doesn't offer any monetary reimbursement?

    That's not much of a friendship. Just my .02.


    5 members found this post helpful.

  4. #4
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    Dec. 21, 2008
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    Missouri
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    Default

    Get a contract / bill of sale and pay $1 for him and just explain to her your feelings/ worries. If she is truly your friend why wouldn't she understand?


    20 members found this post helpful.

  5. #5
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    Jan. 4, 2007
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    TX
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    Quote Originally Posted by candyappy View Post
    Get a contract / bill of sale and pay $1 for him and just explain to her your feelings/ worries. If she is truly your friend why wouldn't she understand?
    That sounds like a good idea.

    Then, you are right to hesitate, as any kind of business deals with friends tends to have an unknown future.
    May be fine, who knows what all may come of that, depending on how changes to both of you happen, plus add a critter to it.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb. 9, 2007
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    72

    Default

    I just went through this exact situation.

    I "bought" the filly in question for $1 with a standard Bill of Sale. Horse is considered sold and mine


    3 members found this post helpful.

  7. #7
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    Aug. 5, 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by candyappy View Post
    Get a contract / bill of sale and pay $1 for him and just explain to her your feelings/ worries. If she is truly your friend why wouldn't she understand?
    This, precisely.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun. 18, 2011
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    Default

    Either ask for a bill of sale and buy him for $1 like others have stated, be prepared to stick with it and possibly lose a friend if she decides she wants him back and goes bonkers when you say no...

    Or take him and make peace with the fact you might have to give him up in the future to save a friendship, and try not to get too attached.

    Of course she could be sincere and it could all go well, you get a nice horse and she sticks to her decision to give him away. The fact you're concerned enough about her reneging on the deal has me wondering if she has a history of being squirrely? Why would she expect to come take the horse back after she gives it away free and clear?


    6 members found this post helpful.

  9. #9
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    Jan. 17, 2008
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    Dutchess County, New York
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    Quote Originally Posted by Copilot View Post
    I just went through this exact situation.

    I "bought" the filly in question for $1 with a standard Bill of Sale. Horse is considered sold and mine
    Me too.



  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep. 3, 2010
    Location
    Northeast
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    Default

    Thanks for the replies...."if" it actually come down to it, will def do the bill of sale $1 thing and say Youre SURE you want this? once hes on the trailer, hes MINE, theres no going back! I could just step back and let her try to sell him and stay out of it, but at the same time, hes a nice horse, known him for years.....hate to have him end up in a bad situation.
    As for being squirrely.....we all think this is some sorta midlife crisis, she insists its not and has a dozen reasons why she suddenly wants to do this.
    Ive just never done the "free" horse thing. Had people try to give me 100 year old, blind, lame, crazy, dangerous horses before.....but never one thats BTDT, flashy, sound, generally quiet decent horse. I could be asking all this prematurely, she may ride him this weekend and decide "I cant give up my baby boy!" but figured I'd get some opinions just in case she shows up with him on the trailer. thanks again everyone


    1 members found this post helpful.

  11. #11
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    Jan. 4, 2007
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    TX
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eastern Promises View Post
    Thanks for the replies...."if" it actually come down to it, will def do the bill of sale $1 thing and say Youre SURE you want this? once hes on the trailer, hes MINE, theres no going back! I could just step back and let her try to sell him and stay out of it, but at the same time, hes a nice horse, known him for years.....hate to have him end up in a bad situation.
    As for being squirrely.....we all think this is some sorta midlife crisis, she insists its not and has a dozen reasons why she suddenly wants to do this.
    Ive just never done the "free" horse thing. Had people try to give me 100 year old, blind, lame, crazy, dangerous horses before.....but never one thats BTDT, flashy, sound, generally quiet decent horse. I could be asking all this prematurely, she may ride him this weekend and decide "I cant give up my baby boy!" but figured I'd get some opinions just in case she shows up with him on the trailer. thanks again everyone
    That friend may be a bit on the "squirrel-y" side after all.



  12. #12
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    Jan. 28, 2013
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    Southeastern US
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    Default

    Blame it on the government. Say you need a bill of sale for a Coggins and health certificate so you can ride him on trails. I'd pay a nominal fee, like $50-$100, just so it feels right. Does he have papers? Add on the cost of the transfer and print out a transfer form for her to sign.
    Is chasing cattle considered playing with your food?.

    War veteran


    6 members found this post helpful.

  13. #13
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    Jun. 18, 2011
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    On the flip-side, you could offer to free lease the horse for a period of time (6 months maybe?) after which she could make a final decision on if she wants to give him up. If she's going through a rough patch, midlife crisis or whatever and ends up wanting him back when she's thinking more clearly, that would be a lovely gesture of friendship.

    I had a guy I barely knew give me an incredible horse, free and clear. Gentle, safe for any rider, well trained, sound, not too old, overall just a really nice horse. To top it off his uncle had bred him and given him the horse as a colt, he owned him his entire life. The horse had even taught his 3 children to ride. Suspicious? You betcha! I felt like a real heel taking the horse too with three teenagers around my trailer crying their good-byes. I told myself no way, no how I'd let myself get too attached because if he called wanting him back I wouldn't have it in me to say no, it was obvious the family loved that horse. They never called wanting him back but I did let them come visit whenever they wanted, which they took advantage of the first couple years until the kids started off to college and moved on with their lives. They all seemed happy knowing their horse had a new, good home with someone (me) that loved him and that was enough for them.

    Sometimes people do indeed just want to see a much-loved horse begin a new chapter in life with someone who will appreciate Dobbin as much as they do and they will give the horse away to make it happen.


    8 members found this post helpful.

  14. #14
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    Sep. 7, 2009
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    Lexington, KY
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    Make sure the $1 is a check and keep the canceled check. Then go for it. The seller of our $1 horse had seller's remorse...I had the signed contract and canceled check.
    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant


    1 members found this post helpful.

  15. #15
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    Jan. 14, 2003
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    Massachusetts
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    Quote Originally Posted by GaitedGloryRider View Post
    On the flip-side, you could offer to free lease the horse for a period of time (6 months maybe?) after which she could make a final decision on if she wants to give him up. If she's going through a rough patch, midlife crisis or whatever and ends up wanting him back when she's thinking more clearly, that would be a lovely gesture of friendship.
    This^^.



  16. #16
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    Mar. 11, 2007
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    Default

    That!^^

    I'd just take him off her hands for a while and enjoy him. Enjoy giving him back if she has a change of heart!


    1 members found this post helpful.

  17. #17
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    Jan. 4, 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by cowboymom View Post
    That!^^

    I'd just take him off her hands for a while and enjoy him. Enjoy giving him back if she has a change of heart!
    I don't think that is what they OP has in mind.
    She already has her own horses to put time in.
    I think if she puts the work in the horse, she wants to be sure it is hers.

    Why would she want to board and train a horse for someone else to come several months later to take it away?


    3 members found this post helpful.

  18. #18
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    Jan. 14, 2003
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    Massachusetts
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluey View Post
    I don't think that is what they OP has in mind.
    She already has her own horses to put time in.
    I think if she puts the work in the horse, she wants to be sure it is hers.

    Why would she want to board and train a horse for someone else to come several months later to take it away?
    What is the deal with "putting in the work"? Or training it? I might imagine the horse is trained already?You take a horse, you ride it and enjoy it. Why does everyone assume you take a horse and "put in work"?

    It sounds like a nice horse and if OP is friends with the horse owner then why not take him and enjoy him and see if the friend is able to make the emotional break? That is what a true friend would do if they are able to afford to do so.

    Perhaps there could be an agreement that the friend pays to feed/shoe and vet the horse for the time OP has it and insist on at least a 90 day period of this before doing the $ bill of sale. That way, both parties are 'protected' and it lessens the possibility of someone getting hurt out of the deal and damaging the friendship. Although, if it were truly one of my good friends I would not imagine a scenario where having my friend pine away for her horse would hurt our friendship if she really wanted him back. Life is too short.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  19. #19
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    Mar. 11, 2007
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    Montana
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    Umm... because she's a nice friend...? I've kept horses at our place for other people before. But I"m not a boarding/showing type of person either....

    If OP isn't going to want to return the horse after some time then definitely OP is going to have to make an airtight transaction and put the friendship secondary.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  20. #20
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    Jan. 4, 2007
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    TX
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eastern Promises View Post
    I have a friend who says she wants to get out of horses. Shes selling her trailer and rehoming horses. She has one horse that Ive always liked and she said if I want him I can have him because she knows where he will be and that its a good home.

    Now, problem is........Im worried this is a midlife crisis and a month from now, or next spring when everyone is showing and riding and stuff, shes going to want him back, after Ive put some training into him (hes been a pasture puff), feed him thru the winter, etc. PLUS getting attached to him!

    Anyone ever run into a situation like this??? I could lose a friend if she does say "I made a mistake I want him back and since I GAVE him to you, you should give him back!" Not sure what to do.....
    Thanks
    Quote Originally Posted by sketcher View Post
    What is the deal with "putting in the work"? Or training it? I might imagine the horse is trained already?You take a horse, you ride it and enjoy it. Why does everyone assume you take a horse and "put in work"?

    It sounds like a nice horse and if OP is friends with the horse owner then why not take him and enjoy him and see if the friend is able to make the emotional break? That is what a true friend would do if they are able to afford to do so.

    Perhaps there could be an agreement that the friend pays to feed/shoe and vet the horse for the time OP has it and insist on at least a 90 day period of this before doing the $ bill of sale. That way, both parties are 'protected' and it lessens the possibility of someone getting hurt out of the deal and damaging the friendship. Although, if it were truly one of my good friends I would not imagine a scenario where having my friend pine away for her horse would hurt our friendship if she really wanted him back. Life is too short.
    That is what the OP stated in her first post, second paragraph.


    2 members found this post helpful.

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