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  1. #21
    Join Date
    May. 8, 2004
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    Vienna, Austria
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    6,776

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    I offered to do one when I got married. My husband had been divorced and his first wife took everything in a very not nice way. I went into the marriage with solid assets, but wanted him to know that his assets were protected in case things didn't work out. He declined, but did think about it.

    12 years, a couple of children later, we're still marching along. At the end of the day, though, if we did divorce, no matter the reason, I still wouldn't try to destroy him (yes, even if he cheated). He would be fair and I would be fair. That's just the kind of people we are.



  2. #22
    Join Date
    Jan. 5, 2012
    Location
    South Carolina
    Posts
    304

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    Remember the recent thread where someone is divorcing after being married for a short time and her husband has sold off some of her horses? If that horse owner had had a prenup, she'd have been able to go right into court and take care of business.

    While it's wonderful to be in love, it's also good to be prepared for disaster. People change.

    Of course some prenups have been challenged and beaten. Just recently in NY, a woman claimed she was coerced into signing a prenup. Years and several children later, her husband is divorcing her. And a judge ruled that the prenup is invalid due to coercion. So she is going to be able to get more assets from the marriage than she would have if the prenup had been upheld.

    Love can sometimes leave a marriage. So make sure you buy your horses in your name.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Apr. 2, 2003
    Posts
    4,385

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    I have one. It's not really about planning for divorce-- I have some financial resources that aren't currently accessible to me (become available when I'm 35) and it was a condition of the inheritance that any marriages I enter either present or future must have a prenuptual agreement protecting that value from the other person.

    So we have one, neither of us care-- it pretty much says split everything, but the trust is off limits. He's got one as well (properties) that I also can't touch in the event of divorce.

    It essentially just says that neither of us can claim the other's inheritance in a divorce proceeding-- it doesn't drill down into things like alimony, child support, etc.



  4. #24
    Join Date
    Apr. 28, 2008
    Posts
    6,856

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    Also, know your state laws. In many (most?) states inherited property does not count as marital property, with some caveats about commingling it.

    Prenups are fine but I found one would not have done much for us. We came in fairly even and will come to any inheritances afterward. For trust fund babies, late in life marriages and pre-existing children they are eminently sensible. Investigate whether you need to protect inheritances too. Post nups are possible in many such circumstances.



  5. #25
    Join Date
    Mar. 19, 2004
    Location
    Earlysville, VA
    Posts
    2,127

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    They make a lot of sense for people coming into later/second marriages with assets and children.

    I can't tell you how many times I have heard a client say "it's a good thing [attorney] recommended one" or "I wish I had listened to [attorney] and gotten one."

    \"Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it.\" Anne of Green Gables



  6. #26
    Join Date
    Aug. 12, 2010
    Location
    Westford, Massachusetts
    Posts
    3,181

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    Quote Originally Posted by mvp View Post
    Interesting the way people with children think of the need to protect their assets... while those without (and getting married for the first time) think that the implication of the need to protect themselves ain't cool or in play.

    Why? It would suck almost equally badly to be a 50-year-old divorcee asked to get back into the work force, kids or no.
    All the examples here involving children are stepfamily situations, where protecting assets in case of death, in particular, is important. In a traditional estate setup, the surviving spouse would get everything...they could then remarry or die and leave everything (including the original spouse's assets) to a second family or other relatives, shutting their stepchildren out. It doesn't even have to be malicious, just a lack of planning issue. I think it's less important in a first marriage with only biological or adopted children, where the usual inheritance routine would cover the kids. The second spouse also is not liable for child support for someone else's kids, so if they divorced, and the parent got screwed out of assets they brought into the marriage, they might have trouble supporting those children.

    And, yeah, any spouse who gives up career aspirations, specifically to support the career of the other should be worried, kids or no.



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