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  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jan. 6, 2013
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    301

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    I posted this in another thread, but my partner calls girth "horse belts". We were at the tack shop yesterday and he pointed out that there were a lot of nice horse belts. He does not ride, but he would like to name any future horse of mine Leon Extended Trotsky.


    16 members found this post helpful.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Nov. 29, 2011
    Posts
    128

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    Quote Originally Posted by meupatdoes View Post
    I was teaching someone their tenth riding lesson the other day and said, "Keep your hands as quiet as you can" a couple of times.

    Finally he asked, "...What sounds are they making?"

    I switched to, "Keep your hands as still as possible."


    Hahaha! I love this kid!

    I call blankets jackets, and rain coats, or snow suits, that's what they are.



  3. #23
    Join Date
    Jan. 4, 2011
    Location
    On a horse.
    Posts
    395

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    Last night I was dealing with a very sick horse (bad reaction to vaccine), and my non-horsey friend tagged along for moral support. As I grabbed a thermometer to take the horse's temp, NHF says in all innocence, "How do you get him to keep the thermometer under his tongue?" lol. I explained which end it went in and he was horrified

    Same friend recently bragged about how much one of my horses liked him since whenever he came near the stall the horse "wagged his tail, and licked at him". I explained that pinned ears, swishing tail, and snapping weren't signs of affection.


    7 members found this post helpful.

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Jan. 4, 2011
    Location
    On a horse.
    Posts
    395

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    Quote Originally Posted by inne View Post
    I posted this in another thread, but my partner calls girth "horse belts". We were at the tack shop yesterday and he pointed out that there were a lot of nice horse belts. He does not ride, but he would like to name any future horse of mine Leon Extended Trotsky.
    lol! Mine does a similar thing Someone "borrowed" my girth recently, and I couldn't find it, so my NHF takes off his belt, hands it to me, and says "You can use my belt to keep his saddle on."


    3 members found this post helpful.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Dec. 8, 2003
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    900

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    I was at an Arizona resort and joined a trail ride. I ride English, so that big Western saddle was not so comfy for me, and the length/angle of the stirrups just felt awkward. So toward the end of the ride, I asked the guide, "Is it ok if I drop my stirrups?"

    He looked confused, then was like, "well, ma'am, these here stirrups are attached to the saddle, and dropping them to the ground would make them hard to find later..."

    Really? Was I using such special vernacular?


    7 members found this post helpful.

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Jan. 6, 2013
    Posts
    301

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    Exactly! He suggested buying a nice, reasonably priced belt from Nordstrom instead of spending $200 on a Passier girth.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Feb. 18, 2011
    Location
    Phillipsburg Ohio
    Posts
    502

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    My little stepdaughter:
    Can I clean Bonnie's cage? (stall)

    My dad after we bought Kitty the pony-
    We got a Heffalump! (she was sold to us as a hafflinger cross)
    He also calls her a doppleganger. (we think she is actually an icelandic)
    ~Former Pet Store Manager (10yrs)
    ~Vintage Toy Dealer (rememberswhen.us)
    Mom to : 1 Horse, 4 Dogs, 4 Cats, 1 Macaw, 6 (Former) Stepkids


    4 members found this post helpful.

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Feb. 7, 2005
    Location
    Eventing Heaven, VA
    Posts
    1,803

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    I remember helping a little boy tack up for his first English lesson. He'd ridden Western before, and could pretty much tack up himself. But he was bewildered by the English rig, and when I asked him why, he replied that there "were too many latches".
    Failure is always an option*
    -Mythbusters

    *As long as you figure out what you f'ed up and fix it! -Me


    2 members found this post helpful.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Nov. 18, 2004
    Location
    Catonsville, MD
    Posts
    6,883

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    Totally love this thread, particularly the 'vernicular'.

    I have explained to my partner that horses spook because they are prey animals, and they don't understand that there are no cougars in Maryland anymore. So when mare spooks at something, he will characterize it as "arena cougars" or "blanket cougars", etc. :-)
    I tolerate all kinds of animal idiosyncrasies.
    I've found that I don't tolerate people idiosyncrasies as well. - Casey09



    8 members found this post helpful.

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Mar. 13, 2007
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    887

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    I've posted this before, but was approached once by very hesitant, apologetic neighbors who were curious to know why I had "blindfolded" my horses, and what they were being punished for! (Fly masks!!! )
    "Dogs give and give and give. Cats are the gift that keeps on grifting." –Bradley Trevor Greive


    5 members found this post helpful.

  11. #31
    Join Date
    Nov. 18, 2004
    Location
    Catonsville, MD
    Posts
    6,883

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    When people ask me about fly masks, I explain that it's a screen door for my horse's face. :-)
    I tolerate all kinds of animal idiosyncrasies.
    I've found that I don't tolerate people idiosyncrasies as well. - Casey09



    7 members found this post helpful.

  12. #32
    Join Date
    Apr. 10, 2012
    Location
    South of Mars
    Posts
    77

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    Long time female work associate of my husband's came one day to visit us at our home...we keep our horses at home and have a small pipe stall barn (warm climate here).

    She did express interest to step outside of the house to 'see the horses', so I took her outside and began to go up to the stalls. However, she REFUSED to go any closer than about 75 ft near the barn area...nothing I could say or do would coax her. Finally I asked why...she replied, "When they jump that metal fence I want a running head start back to your house"...!!! Say what?

    Seems that she was CONVINCED that my vicious horses would suddenly spring up over 5ft fences in a vertical take off jump, fly over the stall bars and immediately run at her and attack and try to kill her! "Horses are killers!" she said. I asked again, HOW did you figure this out, how would you know this? "From the movies, of course", she said seriously.

    This woman is a well travelled PhD professor at a huge university! That she would seriously expect this information to be truth really boggled my mind. Anyway, eventually I was able to explain that they would not and could not do what she pictured and explained the silliness seen in most movies about horses...eventually, after two more visits, she would come within 20 ft of the stalls!

    I still cannot get over this one, LOL!


    6 members found this post helpful.

  13. #33
    Join Date
    Nov. 20, 2011
    Posts
    115

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    My Fiance calls bell boots "plungers"


    4 members found this post helpful.

  14. #34
    Join Date
    Oct. 15, 2010
    Posts
    199

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    I once had a non-horsey person ask me if polo wraps were used to "prevent venomous snake bites."


    3 members found this post helpful.

  15. #35
    Join Date
    Oct. 17, 2012
    Location
    Ontario
    Posts
    157

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    These are amazing! Usually when a non-horse person finds out I ride, they usually either tell me a story of someone going on a trail ride and falling off/getting bitten, etc. or they ask me if I race or jump :S


    5 members found this post helpful.

  16. #36
    Join Date
    Nov. 15, 2010
    Location
    On a horse! (near Chicago)
    Posts
    76

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    Quote Originally Posted by rhinestone_cowgirl View Post
    These are amazing! Usually when a non-horse person finds out I ride, they usually either tell me a story of someone going on a trail ride and falling off/getting bitten, etc. or they ask me if I race or jump :S
    Same here! I WISH I would get something more creative like these...



  17. #37
    Join Date
    Jan. 15, 2013
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    299

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    When I told my fiancé (then boyfriend) I was going to start taking lessons again, he said "why do you need lessons? You already know how to ride."

    Also, I am apparently never allowed to be grossed out by anything ever again because "you had your hand up a horse's sheath!!"


    3 members found this post helpful.

  18. #38
    Join Date
    Oct. 20, 2006
    Posts
    865

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    My nonhorsey husband is pretty good now! He can even now pick apart my two year old from the other two year old she lives with (pretty impressive, they are the same color, age and breed).

    The horses do wear "jackets" and "raincoats" though.

    I have had plenty of people ask why I blind fold my horses (flymask).

    I spent a great deal of time trying to explain floating a horse's teeth to both coworkers and my family.

    One of my supervisors is terrified of horses! Apparently anything with eyes on the side of its head isn't to be trusted. Who knew?

    Husband's friend came out to see the horses and my Arabs were feeling good and spunky and snorting and blowing. Friend was very, very concerned that my horse was sizing him up because it was "growling" at him.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  19. #39
    Join Date
    Jan. 24, 2000
    Location
    Out of the loop
    Posts
    2,842

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    My favorite non-horsey-person saying is my sweet grandmother calling fly sheets and masks "bug jackets" and "bug bonnets." Especially bug bonnets, how freakin' adorable is that?!

    My least favorite is the psycho 20-somethings that whipped over to the side of the road, leapt out of the car and started shrieking at me for "abusing that beautiful animal" by riding her "blindfolded." Scared my poor mare to death and the citiots were damn lucky she didn't really take offense to their shrieking and trying to grab at her head and "free her" from the horrible blindfold. Which was a fly mask. Because we have horrific gnats. Poor abused mare.

    It's OK; I can laugh about it now. But the one with my grandmother is sweet. She always asks about what the horses are wearing.
    Equinox Equine Massage

    In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was in me invincible summer.
    -Albert Camus


    3 members found this post helpful.

  20. #40
    Join Date
    Mar. 14, 2004
    Location
    Left coast, left wing, left field
    Posts
    6,019

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    Quote Originally Posted by ReSomething View Post
    Vernicular = navicular?
    Yes. In the equine vernacular.
    Arrange whatever pieces come your way. - Virginia Woolf

    Did you know that if you say the word "GULLIBLE" really softly, it sounds like "ORANGES"?



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