Edit: lest anybody think this guy is a total newbie, we've had our gelding for 7 years and he comes to the barn regularly!!...
So my fiancé looks at this thick draftX type the guys are bringing in at the barn and asks if that's our gelding. "No, dear, he weighs like twice as much as our little guy."
The guys later bring in our gelding with his large pony buddy. I tell him, "See, there's our horse, don't you recognize him?" And he asks if the pony is our mare. "No, dear, she's about 17.1 hh and this guy is a pony."
About 10 minutes later, someone's hand walking a small, adult gelding. My fiancé asks if that's the "weedling." Um, no, the "weedling" filly is taller, and, well, a filly.
The week before I had asked him to fetch one of the lesson horses for me. It took him about 20 minutes to find her because he went into the "weedling's" paddock instead. The "weedling" isnt so easy to catch. Not quite sure how anybody could confuse a 16 year-old, stocky 16.1 mare with an 8-9 month old "weedling." Maybe it was the pink checkered "coat".
My non-horsey husband always refers to the horse blankets as "jackets." The geldings have "winter jackets" (winter waterproof turnout blankets) and "rain coats" (lightweight waterproof turnout blankets).
Looking to find a place for my daughter to take beginner lessons- I found a place online that seemed to be running as a nice riding school, so- although a little far- I thought it might be a reasonable trade off for a really professional tight ship. Drove down there and was sad to discover that this was a saddle seat facility. Whoops, although the website did show some saddle seat I somehow didn't grasp that it was only saddleseat.
I wasn't going to just spin on my heels and walk out- and I don't really know enough about saddleseat to even know for sure that it's not something I was interested in- so we got a little tour, and along with the schoolies, met a string of show horses belonging to some trainer in the barn- and then we sat down in the really nice lounge to watch a lesson.
I had a hard time explaining anything to my husband because I was pretty out of my element too- and because I also felt obliged to bite my tongue and not explain everything I was seeing- but then he asked me if I thought that the trainer had gotten those pretty show horses off the track.
I finally figured out that he had confused Saddlebreds with Standardbreds- which wouldn't be so bad- if we didn't own a standardbred.
DH uses leash and jacket (or clothes), and "thingie". Head thingie, hoof thingie, straps for reins, belt for cinch. I think he does it on purpose to poke fun at the whole specialized naming thing, because he worked in a Western barn for a couple of years as a kid and right now he is trading labor with my trainer. He drives her NUTS giving all the Saddlebred equipment his own names. Tail doily is my favorite.
But he still knows what to grab for her when she needs it and uses the correct name, so . . .
My husband is very amused at the layman's terms in the horse world. We don't think twice about them, but some ARE very funny.
-Cow hocked. Hubby thought I was saying "cow throw up" like a cat hocking up (sp) a hairball. He wondered why I would think a horse was so bad that I called him cow puke.
My grandma came to watch me ride once. I got done, she may or may not have braved petting the massive beast (15.3 chestnut TB), and then walked out with me as I turned him out. He trotted out to his best friend (16.3 sorrel QH) and she asks, "well now how will you know which one is him again?"
I stifled my laughter and finally left it at, "They have different colored halters"
I was at a neighborhood party with mainly horse people plus my then-boyfriend, a non-horse person. We got into a conversation about the best way to clean sheaths - my boyfriend was not thrilled and had to walk away!
My husband 10+ years ago worked in a show (eventers) facility, and gave it up to work at a therapeutic riding barn, which admittedly does nothing more then saddle/bridle. But I asked him to boot my horse one day (normally I ask him to saddle and bridle him) and he stuck the boots, on the hind legs, on the wrong ones. LOL. I walked out of the office and saw my poor gelding standing there with the most confused look on his face!
I did have a completely dumb non-horse moment once though. I come from paints, and after paints I've ALWAYS had chestnuts or sorrels, I've never owned a bay a day in my life. I was taking care of one of the girls bays, and turned him out with other geldings. I then went back, and realized I had no idea which bay he was. He was 1 of 2 bay Arabs, and 1 of 3 his size. I felt completely dumb!