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  1. #41
    Join Date
    Jan. 6, 2013
    Posts
    304

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    Quote Originally Posted by mvp View Post
    And put a foster cat in my jail cell and life would be complete. I know some places have these programs (as well as horse training programs).

    Would I have to pose as Anti-Cat and Anti-Horse to get in on this gig?
    The dog training programmes sound like a nice way to spend time, but you have to give the dog up eventually. I could not bear it and would have to keep the dog hidden in my cell until my release, at which time I would have to convince the guards that the dog had in fact been part of my personal belongings upon admittance.



  2. #42
    Join Date
    Jun. 1, 2001
    Location
    Rosco, GA
    Posts
    1,908

    Default Raman Noodles

    You take the raman noodles and put them in a trash bag with some water. Then you pee on the trash bag to warm them up. That is how you prepare rMan noodles in jail.



  3. #43
    Join Date
    Aug. 6, 2002
    Location
    NJ, USA
    Posts
    2,266

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    LOL there was a point in my life when I considered jail might be more pleasant than my life was at the moment. I felt trapped in hell, working a** off for people I despised, no guarantee I was going to see the reward - a virtual slave really, all hellish work & no pleasure in life.

    Being locked up seemed like it would be a vacation in comparison. At least I wouldn't have to pretend I adored my tormentors.

    But the difference is, I had a choice - I could have chosen to quit & lose my house & go live under a bridge - or on the track as a groom, that was my fall back plan which didn't seem too bad at the time, except it meant putting a lot of kitties to sleep

    I chose to hang in there, and finally worked my way to a life that is obviously better than prison :-D Back then, I found there are several books written for how to survive in prison - google them!



  4. #44
    Join Date
    Sep. 19, 2003
    Location
    Brentwood, NH
    Posts
    1,069

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    Quote Originally Posted by inne View Post
    This is my favourite thread.



    When my horse is acting up I often think "at least if I have to go to the hospital I can catch up on my sleep" and I suspect jail might provide me with the same opportunity.
    Have you ever been in the hospital? As someone who has spent way too much time in hospitals, I can tell you right off the bat - there is no sleeping in hospitals. Even if you can get past the noise (which would also be a problem in prison) they wake you up every two hours to take your vitals. Seems to me that a stretch of uninterrupted sleep would be more beneficial than knowing whether or not your temperature has changed in the past two hours.

    I hate hospitals.



  5. #45

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    Quote Originally Posted by 4cornersfarm View Post
    Have you ever been in the hospital? As someone who has spent way too much time in hospitals, I can tell you right off the bat - there is no sleeping in hospitals. Even if you can get past the noise (which would also be a problem in prison) they wake you up every two hours to take your vitals. Seems to me that a stretch of uninterrupted sleep would be more beneficial than knowing whether or not your temperature has changed in the past two hours.

    I hate hospitals.
    As well, if you are on an IV, they pump enough fluids through you that you end up visiting the restroom every 45 mins. When I had to stay overnight in the hospital for a surgery, I was happy to go home and sleep.



  6. #46
    Join Date
    Dec. 16, 2008
    Posts
    356

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    Or just as you get to sleep someone comes in to wake you up, take your blood pressure or temperature, or do something else to you. Hospitals are not restful places!
    Rack on!



  7. #47
    Join Date
    Dec. 26, 2011
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    191

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    I know very little about jail other then on your way there you do NOT pass go and you do NOT collect $200.
    Please support S. 1406 to amend the Horse Protection Act and Prevent all Soring Tactics to the Tennessee Walking horse!
    https://www.popvox.com/bills/us/113/s1406


    1 members found this post helpful.

  8. #48
    Join Date
    Jul. 20, 2010
    Location
    Texarkana, AR
    Posts
    1,606

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    About 3 years ago, we removed several children from the members of a local cult. The cult leader, aka the prophet, was into plural marriage of children as young as 10 and severe beatings for those who strayed from his teachings.

    The removal was somewhat screwed up because the US attorney inadvertently leaked the date and time the raid was planned, so some of the parents were able to hide some of their children from law enforcement and DHS staff. So the judge ordered this one mother to jail for contempt since she wouldn't reveal the whereabouts of her kids. Apparently jail food sucks because she lost weight like crazy. She went from being mildly obese to looking really good. We joked about going to jail as a weight loss program and about how long our sentence would have to be to achieve the desired results.

    FWIW, FBI agents do not look like Sandra Bullock and Benjamin Bratt or like the guys on criminal minds. I loved the agents we worked with but he was a little short guy with a crew cut and she was kind of butch. Oh, an SWAT teams are really scary and have no sense of humor. Plus its really scary how much control a religious nut job can wield over their followers.



  9. #49
    Join Date
    Aug. 9, 2007
    Posts
    9,066

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    Our prison system grows its own vegetables but it also grows its own pork. The muslim prisoners file lots of habeas corpus petitions over that. And I've eaten at the Fulton County Prison camp. Food was bland, and we were told by trustees that it was not what they got. When my prisoners came over for court from the Fulton County jail, they were accompanied by cheese sandwiches for lunch at the courthouse.

    Most prisoners get fat in Georgia prisons. Gary Steven Krist, google that name to find a stone cold baddie, used to come to federal court all the time, complaining about prison food being cold and fattening, when I was a federal law clerk. The idiot had buried Barbara Jean Mackle underground to extort money from her wealthy father. He told me I was "nothing but a law clerk" and couldn't judge him!

    As for FBI agents, I found them all to be mostly dull white males who were not smart, and had no sense of humor. The feds wanted our dual jurisdiction over bank robberies and my boss said OK, but when the cases were not a lock, the feds sent them to us. Nothing like having a bunch of dumb white males who did not find the one witness to a bank robbery/murder of the head teller miss the one witness who was working at a nearby store who saw the defendants before they put on their ski masks. LOL, which I found by just going out there and asking if anyone saw anything. Elliot Ness the feds aren't.

    If you want to see cops, both swat and otherwise, with great senses of humor, you should have been around Atlanta PD when we had some wild and crazy times over my 20 yrs. It was like Hill Street Blues, southern style. Some pathos, lots of wild and crazy fun.

    I once got locked up in the Fulton County jail with a defendant and his lawyer, when a shirt change occurred and no one was notified that we were in some out of the way room on a cell block. I actually was worried that we'd be found by prisoners instead of by guards.



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