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  1. #81
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    Dec. 4, 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by MyGiantPony View Post
    Have you ever tried to stop an infant from crying when it needs to?
    In fact, yes. I have. Watch your assumptions.

    But from what I can tell (and I can tell) they are choosing not to make an effort.

    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    Maybe they can't do much about all if it, but maybe they won't be screaming at the top of their voice to 'Jeffrey' anymore.
    Fortunately, the screaming at Jeffrey has ended. I felt bad for the kid -- very unhappy/jealous of his new sibling (sibling crying meant Jeffrey needed to make a simultaneous bid for attention). But, at that point, the infant's crying was not quite so loud/white noise. The kid has now developed some set of lungs.


    5 members found this post helpful.

  2. #82
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    Nov. 2, 2001
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    Packing my bags
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    Quote Originally Posted by MyGiantPony View Post
    Even if the parents aren't aware that the crying is affecting their neighbors, what do you propose they do to fix it? Have you ever tried to stop an infant from crying when it needs to? And yes, an infant crying is a NEED - it's their form of communication as they can't speak.

    Parents figure out the different cries - hungry, dirty diaper, just plain pissed for no good reason. This particular case does sound like the parents are trying to teach the baby to self soothe, as it is on such a regular schedule.

    If you choose to live in a community environment, you are choosing to live with some circumstances that are out of your control. A crying infant is often out of even the parents' control.
    well, I think it is clear that the OP hears more than just the crying baby...including the parental communication or rather lack there of.

    And I think she would be half as annoyed if she would hear any reasonable efforts on the side of the parents to quelch the screaming....you know, a sign of caring....

    But unless the parents are blissfully ignorant of the fact that there is no sound proofing reeks of a big FU in the general direction of the neighbors....
    Quote Originally Posted by Mozart View Post
    Personally, I think the moderate use of shock collars in training humans should be allowed.


    11 members found this post helpful.

  3. #83
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    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    853

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    Okay. A dog barks because it has a need. Do you let it bark itself out until it falls asleep? What about a puppy? Do you just let it bark? That is it's form of communication. So if your dog barked at 5am and 7am everymoring, would you as the owner just let it?

    I know a baby isn't a dog. I get it. But can't you see the corelation?


    9 members found this post helpful.

  4. #84
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    Jun. 25, 2004
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    Carolinas
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    Quote Originally Posted by candyappy View Post
    I am sure they are trying to get the baby to the point of sleeping through the night. They have been getting up every few hours for the last 7 months and enough is enough. They are suffering right along with you, believe me I know from experience.

    This is one of the inconveniences of apartment living-- noisy neighbors. If you just bear with them it won't last too long. You could always move.
    Several have suggested moving. Why?
    Does the OP not have any rights?
    If anyone else's actions disturb or interfere or offend the OP, he/she has to deal with it or move?

    I doubt all of you have moved repeatedly when noisy neighbors moved next to you. Instead you figured out a solution. Solutions that included speaking with managers, the neighbor or police. The OP has the same rights.
    "Never do anything that you have to explain twice to the paramedics."
    Courtesy my cousin Tim


    28 members found this post helpful.

  5. #85
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    Sep. 19, 2008
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    160

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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    I am on the verge of putting a note under their door that says something like:


    Hi --

    I'm sympathetic to the travails of new parents, but please be aware that when your youngest cries, it sounds like s/he's in the room with me. I'm glad that your son is more accepting of his new sibling -- I suffered through his temper tantrums with you -- but your youngest's increased lung power makes itself apparent at about 5am and 7am every morning.

    Please be courteous to your neighbors, and recognize that being woken this way each morning -- generally twice -- is negatively impacting their lives. Sadly, the acoustics of this building is entirely out of my control.

    Thank you.

    Thoughts?
    Let's hope that they simply aren't aware how the noise their kids make carries. The note is polite and gets the point across, send it. You could also ask the condo association about better insulation or noise reduction methods for all units. If you ever want to sell your unit, having noisy neighbors may be an issue.

    If these people aren't willing to be considerate of their neighbors, the noise these kids make will be an issue for your condo building (or anywhere this family lives) for as long as those people live there or until the kids grow up and move out.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  6. #86
    Join Date
    Dec. 21, 2008
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    Longing to be where I once was.....
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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    This was uncalled for. I have been dealing with excess noise at nightime hours since NOVEMBER. It is now February. Shall I assist you with counting?



    The number of people recommending moving is a little incredible to me. Is it really that easy for people to pick up and move? Find new affordable housing? Incur the costs of moving?


    You knew they had children didn't you? You still chose to move there knowing that. Kids make noise and lots of it. Some adult neighbors w/o kids make more noise than kids do.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  7. #87
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    Sep. 24, 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by fooler View Post
    Several have suggested moving. Why?
    Does the OP not have any rights?
    If anyone else's actions disturb or interfere or offend the OP, he/she has to deal with it or move?

    I doubt all of you have moved repeatedly when noisy neighbors moved next to you. Instead you figured out a solution. Solutions that included speaking with managers, the neighbor or police. The OP has the same rights.
    Exactly !

    Sure, kids cry and make noise, some more than others. But that doesn't mean that it's okay if it goes on and on that early in the monring.


    13 members found this post helpful.

  8. #88
    Join Date
    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    853

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    Quote Originally Posted by candyappy View Post
    You knew they had children didn't you? You still chose to move there knowing that. Kids make noise and lots of it. Some adult neighbors w/o kids make more noise than kids do.
    The OP was there first. The family is the newcomers.


    20 members found this post helpful.

  9. #89
    Join Date
    Oct. 8, 2002
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    Maryland
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    9,543

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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    This was uncalled for. I have been dealing with excess noise at nightime hours since NOVEMBER. It is now February. Shall I assist you with counting?



    The number of people recommending moving is a little incredible to me. Is it really that easy for people to pick up and move? Find new affordable housing? Incur the costs of moving?

    I think most people are suggesting that as an option, if noise is that much of a problem for you. Yes, it is hard, but if you hate hearing noise THAT much that your quality of life is seriously affected (and if it wasn't the baby, then what? When you share walls, it's always something), then it's one of the options to consider.

    Look, this situation is temporary. Kiddo will grow out of it. And I feel your pain - I've been dealing with frequent loud crying waking me up (and often keeping me up) since november of 2011, so I know how awful it is. I don't wish that pain on anyone! But there's a middle ground to be had and sending P-A notes doesn't help.

    There have been good suggestions on here - taking soundproofing measures, getting a white noise machine, and nicely starting a conversation with the parents to let them know that baby is heard all over the building, without making them feel shitty about it.

    At the same time, stuff happens that's beyond our control. We have a fire station down the street, and train tracks nearby. That frequently wakes me up, but it's the price of living where we live. My neighbors play their tv really loud, which frequently wakes kiddo from hard-won naps or makes it hard for me to fall asleep. It makes me want to scream, but that's the deal when you share walls. And your neighbor has a baby who cries a lot in the morning. You waited out the tantrums with jeffrey, this will end too. But if you do want to say something, there's a nice way to do it and a way that will create bad feelings/neighbor wars.
    "smile a lot can let us ride happy,it is good thing"

    My CANTER blog.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  10. #90

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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    In fact, yes. I have. Watch your assumptions. But from what I can tell (and I can tell) they are choosing not to make an effort.
    Well, I wasn't quoting you, so don't be so touchy. But I have my doubts that you've had any long term exposure to a crying infant. Like straight days of colic screaming. Or teething. Or a baby that just cries a lot. You can't reason with an infant, no matter what parenting techniques you choose. So your note isn't going to solve anything. Because the parents can't say "oh, Baby, stop crying because it's a bother to the neighbors".

    And yes, I'm quite aware of your self stated omniscience WRT this family.
    http://www.tbhsa.com/index.html

    Originally Posted by JSwan
    I love feral children. They taste like chicken.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  11. #91
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    Oct. 8, 2002
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    Maryland
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    The OP was there first. The family is the newcomers.
    That's not what she said:

    When I moved in (mid-November) it was clear that neighbors above had a new infant.
    "smile a lot can let us ride happy,it is good thing"

    My CANTER blog.



  12. #92
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    Dec. 21, 2008
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    Longing to be where I once was.....
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    Okay. A dog barks because it has a need. Do you let it bark itself out until it falls asleep? What about a puppy? Do you just let it bark? That is it's form of communication. So if your dog barked at 5am and 7am everymoring, would you as the owner just let it?

    I know a baby isn't a dog. I get it. But can't you see the corelation?
    Babies wake up to eat every couple of hours through the night from day 1. After about 6 months most babies can make it through the night without needing to eat, but continue to wake up anyways and cry for mom. If this pattern isn't broken poor parents will be getting up to rock baby back to sleep. Baby NEEDS TO LEARN that they can get to sleep all on their own. Unfortunately this means a period of adjustment that can have a lot of crying involved and usually not at the most convenient times. I think the OP needs to just hang in there because it won't last forever.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  13. #93
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    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    853

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    You know, it sounds like if this family would just reach out to the neighbors and say, "I know this is a lot of noise, and I'm so sorry", that would go a long way. Just that they acknowledge that this is a problem, most people would be pretty lienient.

    But from what the OP says, it soulds like the Parents are the ones wearing earplugs in the morning.


    12 members found this post helpful.

  14. #94
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    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    853

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    Quote Originally Posted by caffeinated View Post
    That's not what she said:
    My apolgies. I thought I read that they were the newcomers.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  15. #95
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    Aug. 1, 2007
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    West Palm Beach, FL
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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    This was uncalled for. I have been dealing with excess noise at nightime hours since NOVEMBER. It is now February. Shall I assist you with counting?
    Ok, well I'm not exactly sure what your counting comment is in reference to, and the quoted piece from my original post was pure hyperbole, but get this: I've been dealing with excess noise at nighttime hours since AUGUST 2011 (that's 18 months, right? Double check my counting for me). I have extremely loud upstairs neighbors with wood floors who work odd hours. But I knew getting into it that I was moving into a condo with neighbors and that was something I'd have to deal with. So I deal with it, even though for the past EIGHTEEN MONTHS, they're still thunking around upstairs until 1:30/2:00 AM.
    Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  16. #96
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    Sep. 7, 2009
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    Lexington, KY
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    Okay. A dog barks because it has a need. Do you let it bark itself out until it falls asleep? What about a puppy? Do you just let it bark? That is it's form of communication. So if your dog barked at 5am and 7am everymoring, would you as the owner just let it?

    I know a baby isn't a dog. I get it. But can't you see the corelation?
    What do you suggest as a solution? I suspect a shock collar might get the parents in a bit of trouble. Someone did suggest duct tape though <sarcasm>.
    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant


    1 members found this post helpful.

  17. #97

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    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    Okay. A dog barks because it has a need. Do you let it bark itself out until it falls asleep? What about a puppy? Do you just let it bark? That is it&#39;s form of communication. So if your dog barked at 5am and 7am everymoring, would you as the owner just let it? I know a baby isn&#39;t a dog. I get it. But can&#39;t you see the corelation?
    If all of the dog&#39;s/puppy&#39;s needs have been addressed (potty, food, water, no injuries, etc.) then yes, I would let it bark for up to 15 minutes. Otherwise, what do they learn? I make noise, I get attention.

    But we aren&#39;t talking about a dog. We are talking about an infant. How often do dogs bark to say I FEEL CRAPPY AND JUST WANT TO TELL THE WORLD. Babies do that.
    http://www.tbhsa.com/index.html

    Originally Posted by JSwan
    I love feral children. They taste like chicken.



  18. #98
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    Sep. 3, 2006
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    111

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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    This was uncalled for. I have been dealing with excess noise at nightime hours since NOVEMBER. It is now February. Shall I assist you with counting?... The number of people recommending moving is a little incredible to me. Is it really that easy for people to pick up and move? Find new affordable housing? Incur the costs of moving?
    KayBee - I really, really feel for you. I'm the lightest of sleepers, and any little noise will wake me up. So I can fully understand your angst. A baby's cry (any baby, any species) has been found to be the top of the "immediate alert" list for the female ear. Of all noises it catches the quickest attention, and sets the heart racing. Feel free to blame all that on biology.

    A prior poster suggested you soundproof your unit. I'm here to double suggest you look into that. The difference that a roll of soundproofing on your common walls, or acoustic tiles on your ceiling, can make to your zone of peace and quiet, even if it is only in your bedroom, is AMAZING. You will feel like you're in a tomb. It can create a silence that can be a bit unnerving.

    If you own your place, talk to a contractor about putting up some interior 2x4s studding that will allow you to add another level of THICK insulation (beyond what is preexisting in the current walls). Buy the rolled insulation. It is the best for soundproofing. Once the insulation is in (takes a few minutes) nail some lovely wood paneling over the studs. Install the acoustic tiles on your roof. Get the best acoustics you can buy.

    Making these changes will reduce your interior wall space by about 4-6", but the SILENCE you will get will make you cry for joy. And this blessed peace and quiet will be yours from now until doomsday.

    Good luck, big cyber <<hugs>>, and get your fingers walking through the yellow pages for a contractor. Sadly, not much you can do about the crying baby...except block the noise in your own domain, and feel sorry for the parents. They can't block it out, or Social Services will be knocking on their door.


    10 members found this post helpful.

  19. #99
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    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    Quote Originally Posted by LauraKY View Post
    What do you suggest as a solution? I suspect a shock collar might get the parents in a bit of trouble. Someone did suggest duct tape though <sarcasm>.
    LOL. Yes, a shock collar and duct tape would get them into trouble.

    My point is that its an attiude thing. Most people with a barking dog, find it irritating, and apologize to their neighbors. So why, do people just assume that everybody else should put up with their child? Again, a little consideration or just plain acknowledgement of the problem goes a long, long way. Most people would sympathize in that case if the parent comes down and acknowledges that they might be an annoyance. Most people would respond incredibly kindly in that case.

    This is the difference. Parents who believe that they have all the rights because THEY HAVE CHILDREN as opposed to parents who believe that people around them have rights as well.

    Having pets is a responsibility, and part of that responsibility is to the others around you. So why does having children suddenly make it everybody else's responsibility to 'deal with it' to an awful lot of parents? (Yes, yes, I know - not all.)
    Last edited by Thoroughbred1201; Feb. 21, 2013 at 04:20 PM. Reason: Addition


    15 members found this post helpful.

  20. #100
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    Aug. 12, 2010
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    Westford, Massachusetts
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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    In fact, yes. I have. Watch your assumptions.

    But from what I can tell (and I can tell) they are choosing not to make an effort.
    You don't know what's going on up there. Babies cry for no discernible reason at all...they can be dry, fed, warm, healthy, being held and sometimes they still scream their heads off. I'm not a fan of "cry it out" for sleep training and attended to my boys when they cried. But, both of them had periods (usually in the evening) when they'd cry and cry and cry, even while being held, rocked, sung to, walked around, etc... There was absolutely nothing to do about it. Putting them in the car and driving around would sometimes stop it, but that isn't always an option. Sometimes running the vacuum cleaner helped, but that would wake the neighbors too!

    Fortunately, that phase did not last all that long and they outgrew it, but it sure seemed like much longer period than it was.


    1 members found this post helpful.

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