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  1. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    Okay. A dog barks because it has a need. Do you let it bark itself out until it falls asleep? What about a puppy? Do you just let it bark? That is it's form of communication. So if your dog barked at 5am and 7am everymoring, would you as the owner just let it?

    I know a baby isn't a dog. I get it. But can't you see the corelation?
    I don't think the correlation is correct.

    Human beings can develop a much more sophisticated ability to self-sooth than can dogs. So there's a skill that can and should be taught to the kid that cannot be taught to the dog. Or if it can be taught to the barking dog, you'd have to do it a different way.

    But untrained dogs and children both suffer for having not been taught the rules. That's the correlation.
    The armchair saddler
    Politically Pro-Cat



  2. #102
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    Dec. 11, 2006
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    I feel your pain, only I share a wall with my neighbors & their baby, not a floor/ceiling. We both rent. I was there first by 2+ years. Mr. Landlord won't replace leaky windows, so soundproofing is a definite "do not ask." That, and I can clearly hear them, as well as other neighbors, through the vent system. I was warned about "canoeing" when I first moved in by the downstairs tenant (formerly a tutoring group, now a couple of crabby, unfriendly financial people who can't stand to have the only window in the shared stairwell that has a screen open. And she rides.)

    Anyway. My bedroom is as far away from the other apartments as possible. If we shared a wall, I'd be unhappy since I cannot sleep with earplugs or any kind of noise-cancelling device. I NEED to hear what's going on around me, should I need to wake from sleep. Turning up the TV didn't work when I wasn't watching TV. I did/do feel better after bitching about it on Facebook

    She wasn't just a fussy, colicky crier. That kid HATED bathtime for months. HATED it. Screamed her bloody head off the entire time the water was running. There was one day though, that I was extremely concerned. Her cries weren't annoyed or angry or fussy, they said pain and/or terror. Never heard the adult comforting her, either. That was the one day I considered calling authorities.

    She's now over a year old. I can finally hear happier babbling instead of crying. I figure they won't be there more than a couple of more years because we have NO yard and our front doors open directly on the street (look both ways before leaving the building--NOT kidding).

    I also don't complain because I know they can hear me as well. My TV used to be on the shared wall until my son moved out & I relocated it in his room. If I can hear her vacuum the stairs or talk in the bathroom, they can hear my TV, my blender and (I assume) the occasional 3 AM giggling game of quarters or Pass the Pigs when my college-age son & his girlfriend/friends come home to visit. I'm quite sure they can hear the cats yell at feeding time, since I once heard their cat get a bath shortly before the kid was born.

    I'm lucky that my sleep isn't disturbed by that kid (have no idea what her name really is but I've given her my own name )

    The third resident in our building is a college student. With a band. There was nowhere I could go to get away from that noise. I was about to call Mr. Landlord (and if it hadn't been freezing, knock on his door in my PJs--none of us share a stairwell) but I think Baby Neighbors complained first.

    I wish I could help you reword that note to make it a bit softer, but my own imagined notes are far, far worse

    However, if my neighbors engaged in Date Night canoeing (such as what a coworker had to endure) I would most certainly respond by banging on the wall or turning up music or yelling, "Hurry up. I can tell she's faking!"
    I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right
    Violence doesn't end violence. It extends it. Break the cycle.



  3. #103
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    Sep. 7, 2009
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    Lexington, KY
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    You want to make sure interior studs being used for sound proofing are isolated from the original studs...no touching. I used to live in a townhouse.
    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant



  4. #104
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    Oct. 8, 2002
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    Maryland
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    Quote Originally Posted by HighFlyinBey++ View Post
    I would most certainly respond by banging on the wall or turning up music or yelling, "Hurry up. I can tell she's faking!"

    bwahahahahahahaaaa!
    "smile a lot can let us ride happy,it is good thing"

    My CANTER blog.


    8 members found this post helpful.

  5. #105
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    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    Quote Originally Posted by mvp View Post
    I don't think the correlation is correct.

    But untrained dogs and children both suffer for having not been taught the rules. That's the correlation.
    Exactly.



  6. #106
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    Nov. 2, 2001
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    Quote Originally Posted by HighFlyinBey++ View Post
    However, if my neighbors engaged in Date Night canoeing (such as what a coworker had to endure) I would most certainly respond by banging on the wall or turning up music or yelling, "Hurry up. I can tell she's faking!"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dS0-lvey5w
    Quote Originally Posted by Mozart View Post
    Personally, I think the moderate use of shock collars in training humans should be allowed.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  7. #107
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    Jan. 9, 2003
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    Quote Originally Posted by KayBee View Post
    But from what I can tell (and I can tell) they are choosing not to make an effort.
    If the crying is only a problem for 15 to 30 minutes twice a day, then it seems that they ARE making an effort to keep the infant as happy as possible. And doing a good job at it too.

    I've always wondered what it's like to be the center of the universe. Could you start a new thread describing your experience with that before OT day is over please?


    10 members found this post helpful.

  8. #108
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    Apr. 1, 2008
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    As I have read through this rather long thread, it kept coming back to me....if this is the worst thing KayBee has to tolerate in the next 12 months, be grateful.

    I know of people dealing with cancer, terminal cancer in a loved one.

    I read this thread earlier today, my heart breaks for her family.

    Earlier this week a 24 year old man lost his life in a fatal car crash from my town. I'm sure there are people in his family that would be happy and grateful to have him back in exchange for putting up with a crying baby.

    OP, quit being so selfish. This too shall pass.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  9. #109
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    Sep. 3, 2006
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    111

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    Quote Originally Posted by LauraKY View Post
    You want to make sure interior studs being used for sound proofing are isolated from the original studs...no touching. I used to live in a townhouse.
    I don't advocate removing the existing drywall (or whatever is currently on the existing wall). So let me amend my comments by suggesting the OP build a second wall that can be tied into the current wall's drywall using drywall screws. The second wall won't be supporting anything other than itself, so no need to bolt it into the current wall studs.

    Really, the difference insulation can make in blocking sound is incredible. The OP won't be part of the baby's yearly noise stages from toddler to terrible twos to temper-tantrum threes to frantic fours...or even any canoeing adventures going on in other units...but she will be getting a great night's sleep every night, and smiling, refreshed and happy, at all her neighbors every morning.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  10. #110
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    Quote Originally Posted by ynl063w View Post
    If the crying is only a problem for 15 to 30 minutes twice a day, then it seems that they ARE making an effort to keep the infant as happy as possible. And doing a good job at it too.

    I've always wondered what it's like to be the center of the universe. Could you start a new thread describing your experience with that before OT day is over please?
    since we are assuming, we can also assume that the OP is out of the house most of the day and missed daytime crying.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mozart View Post
    Personally, I think the moderate use of shock collars in training humans should be allowed.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  11. #111
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    Apr. 10, 2006
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    I had a hugely fussy baby that cried for most of his first 2 years. Up in the middle of the night, screaming in pain, due to medical issues. It was awful for Mr. FG and I, and I'm sure doubly awful for our neighbor-- whose bedroom window is directly across from ours.

    I remember apologizing to him once and he was kind enough to smile and say it was ok, he had kids once, he understood. I am still grateful for his understanding and sympathy, though I have no doubt the crying was annoying, and at times, perhaps unnerving. Because no matter what we did to soothe him, he had the piercing, anxious pain cry going on.

    Before we had kids, we lived in a townhouse when we first got married, it was craziness.... between the people below who were canoeing LOUDLY at all hours, and the people next door who were forever having domestic disputes at 12:30am when they got home from the bar.

    I'd suggest sound proofing if you own the unit and plan on staying there. If you can hear their low-voiced conversations, those are some thin walls.

    Babies cry-- having two young kids is hard. If you think there is really something going on that is truly not right, then by all means report it to the authorities... but sounds more like typical baby crying, parents dealing with two young kids, etc.
    Last edited by FlashGordon; Feb. 21, 2013 at 05:01 PM. Reason: grammar
    We couldn't all be cowboys, so some of us are clowns.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  12. #112
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    Sep. 8, 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by threedogpack View Post
    As I have read through this rather long thread, it kept coming back to me....if this is the worst thing KayBee has to tolerate in the next 12 months, be grateful.

    I know of people dealing with cancer, terminal cancer in a loved one.

    I read this thread earlier today, my heart breaks for her family.

    Earlier this week a 24 year old man lost his life in a fatal car crash from my town. I'm sure there are people in his family that would be happy and grateful to have him back in exchange for putting up with a crying baby.

    OP, quit being so selfish. This too shall pass.
    The OP may indeed be selfish. With that said, I'm not really sure we need to invoke cancer and freak fatal accidents to shame her into silence. Ninety percent of the threads here don't amount to a hill of beans next to terminal cancer, but I don't think that obligates the rest of us never to utter a complaining word unless we or someone close to us is dead or dying.
    Everyone is entitled to my opinion.


    25 members found this post helpful.

  13. #113
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    Jan. 18, 2004
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    Western WA
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    Quote Originally Posted by pdq View Post
    I don't advocate removing the existing drywall (or whatever is currently on the existing wall. So I'll amend my comments by suggesting the OP build a second wall that can be tied into the current wall's drywall using drywall screws. The second wall won't be supporting anything other than itself, so no need to bolt it into the current wall studs.

    Really, the difference in blocking sound is incredible. The OP won't be part of the baby's yearly noise stages from toddler to terrible twos to temper-tantrum threes to frantic fours...but she will be getting a great night's sleep every night, and smiling, refreshed and happy, at her neighbors every morning.
    My neighbors on one side of my townhouse are fairly noisy. I solved it by putting my bookcases along that wall. Instant sound buffering!


    4 members found this post helpful.

  14. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alagirl View Post
    since we are assuming, we can also assume that the OP is out of the house most of the day and missed daytime crying.
    Sure, but the non-daytime crying hours are apparently limited to 15 to 30 minutes at 5 and 7 AM. The reality is that that's pretty impressive for an infant.


    5 members found this post helpful.

  15. #115
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    Quote Originally Posted by ynl063w View Post
    Sure, but the non-daytime crying hours are apparently limited to 15 to 30 minutes at 5 and 7 AM. The reality is that that's pretty impressive for an infant.
    It's nice, yes....
    Quote Originally Posted by Mozart View Post
    Personally, I think the moderate use of shock collars in training humans should be allowed.



  16. #116
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    May. 4, 2003
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    I'm one of the lone voices to sympathise with the OP - living in rental accommodations means you have to learn to get along with all sorts, and that includes people with noisy children showing consideration for other tenants.
    A person cannot be sure who will be moving in next door or upstairs, but it is even harder if you own your suite.

    I think the building manager could mention to them that neighbours are finding the children annoying without saying who. I'd try to move to the top floor when the chance came up.
    Proud member of People Who Hate to Kill Wildlife clique


    3 members found this post helpful.

  17. #117
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    Apr. 1, 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foxtrot's View Post
    I'm one of the lone voices to sympathise with the OP -
    Oh I sympathize, but I don't empathize.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  18. #118
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    Dec. 11, 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alagirl View Post
    Exactly!
    Quote Originally Posted by Windsor1 View Post
    The OP may indeed be selfish. With that said, I'm not really sure we need to invoke cancer and freak fatal accidents to shame her into silence. Ninety percent of the threads here don't amount to a hill of beans next to terminal cancer, but I don't think that obligates the rest of us never to utter a complaining word unless we or someone close to us is dead or dying.
    I don't find suffering in silence to be noble. First world problems are still problems. (Don't let them consume your life, though)
    Quote Originally Posted by Thoroughbred1201 View Post
    My neighbors on one side of my townhouse are fairly noisy. I solved it by putting my bookcases along that wall. Instant sound buffering!
    I did that too! Didn't work

    And she's yelling again. Gonna be fun when she learns to say "NO"
    I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right
    Violence doesn't end violence. It extends it. Break the cycle.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  19. #119
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    Jan. 18, 2013
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    Quote Originally Posted by threedogpack View Post
    As I have read through this rather long thread, it kept coming back to me....if this is the worst thing KayBee has to tolerate in the next 12 months, be grateful.

    I know of people dealing with cancer, terminal cancer in a loved one.

    I read this thread earlier today, my heart breaks for her family.

    Earlier this week a 24 year old man lost his life in a fatal car crash from my town. I'm sure there are people in his family that would be happy and grateful to have him back in exchange for putting up with a crying baby.

    OP, quit being so selfish. This too shall pass.
    As much as I understand where you're coming from, I don't think it's fair to discount how someone feels just because someone else may have it worse than they do.

    Either way, the OP doesn't seem particularly keen to take anyones suggestions (at least from what I've seen) and that's all fine and dandy. No one said moving was the only option here, but it was simply one of. Listening to a crying child is fun for no one, parents included, and I think everyone can sympathize there.

    My main point, whether I failed to make it or not a couple of pages back, is slipping a note worded like the one the OP posted under their door will, more likely than not, put them in a defensive mode. If I got a note like that under my door, I'd chuck it in the trash.

    No one is saying the OP shouldn't take action, but there are ways to go about it that aren't as chiding as a snarky note. FWIW, I can't stand children and plan to never have any. However, not everyone in the world shares my views on procreating and raising kids. I wouldn't want to listen to an infant crying in the wee hours of the morning, but I also understand that a) they cry and b) communal housing does come with some hang ups.

    Ultimately, do whatever you like OP, but there are some options that may come with more negative repercussions than others.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  20. #120
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    Oct. 16, 2008
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    Those of you who say "babies cry", you aren't saying since babies cry, that all neighbors need to suck up and suffer, while the parents assume "it's not my responsibility"?

    I understand a bit of tolerance goes a long way, but tolerance needs to be two way, meaning, the parents had better do everything they can to alleviate the burdens they place on their neighbors. It's the same as shrieking kids at restaurants. If kids misbehave, the parents had better do something about it, instead of, "Kids misbehave, now you diners suck up and take it."


    15 members found this post helpful.

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