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  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jan. 18, 2013
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    125

    Default

    Sort of applicable to this thread, http://captainawkward.com/ is a great site to read if you haven't come across it yet!



  2. #22
    Join Date
    May. 9, 2005
    Location
    Chattanooga, Tennessee
    Posts
    3,572

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    Honestly? I don't think its awkward. I have plenty of male married friends and acquaintances and often I WILL send a message as opposed to posting a comment if a discussion or comment may lead to a longer discourse, whether I know the person well or not. While my relationship with my SO is a more uncommon type, I don't presume that upon anyone else, but I also don't see ANY issue with developing completely platonic relationships with others of the opposite sex and single, married, or other. I don't think that a married man being friendly with an acquaintance is any reason to immediately jump to nefarious inappropriate ideas...he's a person, wanting to speak to another person. Gods help me if I didn't have male friends or speak to men I don't know well of various relationship statuses, I'd never have friends. Same for my SO, who mainly has female friends of various relationship statuses.



  3. #23
    Join Date
    Feb. 28, 2006
    Location
    The rocky part of KY
    Posts
    9,429

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    I blocked a Fb friend mostly because of my reaction to what I saw in the pics she posted, not anything extreme, sex or drugs or lillegal, just stupid a$$ed horse related stuff. Too skinny, equipment issues, like that. Worst of CL showing up on my Fb page, oh joy.


    If it bothers you then ignore it. If you're like me and you get peeved about having it in your face and have a hard time just ignoring it, block or hide him.

    I have unfriended people before and never got a comment about it, but this guy would probably notice, he's probably using the chat feature, just like the one friend might, so block or hide.
    Courageous Weenie Eventer Wannabe
    Incredible Invisible



  4. #24
    Join Date
    Feb. 23, 2009
    Location
    PA
    Posts
    1,234

    Default

    I'd unfriend him. The one message about not wanting to "pubicly" like something you wrote? Why the heck not, if you're above-the-board acquaintances who are members of the same club? That would set off my skeev-o-meter (as it sounds like it has with you) and I'd click unfriend without a second thought. Go with your gut, it's usually spot-on .
    If it were easy, everybody would do it.

    Equi-Sport Services



  5. #25
    Join Date
    Sep. 7, 2009
    Location
    Lexington, KY
    Posts
    17,959

    Default

    I have male friends who private message me on facebook...so what? If a woman sent you the same messages, would it bother you?
    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant


    1 members found this post helpful.

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Dec. 31, 2009
    Location
    Area 51
    Posts
    1,650

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    I don't see anything inappropriate in those example comments. Facebook is all about telling the world your every move...what do you expect?
    I LOVE my Chickens!


    1 members found this post helpful.

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Jan. 10, 2002
    Location
    Area VIII, Region 2, Zone 5.
    Posts
    6,718

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    Quote Originally Posted by mvp View Post
    3b. i. You are not another adult's pants police.
    3b. ii. You ARE the sole keeper of your pants.
    See? Simple!
    I think I have a new signature! With mvp's kind permission, of course.
    Quote Originally Posted by Linny View Post
    Those martingales were so taut, you could play Ode to Joy on them with a comb


    1 members found this post helpful.

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Aug. 25, 2008
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,075

    Default

    I gotta admit I love that, too!



  9. #29
    Join Date
    Aug. 4, 2006
    Location
    Branson, Missouri
    Posts
    380

    Default

    OP....Go with your gut on this. Instincts are usually right on. You can also set your Facebook settings to where he is still your "friend" but does not see anything you post. That way there is no awkward "Why did you un-friend me?" question next time your club meets. It will look like on your end you just quit posting on Facebook. You can also block him from seeing your chat light on.
    "I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way."



  10. #30
    Join Date
    Jun. 24, 2005
    Location
    Alabama
    Posts
    8,616

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    If you are uncomfortable, then go with that. I would do as Jamie said, and hide his posts, and delete his emails. I bet he emails, and comments on so many people's threads on FB that he will never guess he's been eliminated from your page. I suspect that he thinks he's being friendly, but if you don't like it, then get rid of him.
    You can't fix stupid-Ron White



  11. #31
    Join Date
    Dec. 4, 2005
    Location
    washington state
    Posts
    8,030

    Default

    Thanks for all the comments! FYI-this guy is not my friend. I do have many male friends who message me as they are my friends with a reason to message. Big difference!

    Also, I don't use chat so people can't tell if I'm online or not, I have the feature turned off 24/7.

    Jamie, I really like your idea! Thank you
    The Knotted Pony

    Proud and upstanding member of the Snort and Blow Clique.



  12. #32
    Join Date
    Dec. 29, 2012
    Location
    La La Land
    Posts
    486

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    I am to the point in my life where if someone bothers you in any sort of fashion, you delete them from data base. I am also a very superstitious lot, and never ever ignore the little voice in my head. Its really not about what he is saying, or how he is going about saying it, its about how you feel. As far as a later scene about why he was unfriended, blow it off with " I'm really busy and can only keep up with my close friends and family"



  13. #33
    Join Date
    Oct. 2, 2012
    Posts
    1,832

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    I weaned myself off of FB with messages to people that said something like "I am trying to shrink my online presence, but please give me your email so we can stay in touch."

    That was an inoffensive way to unfriend people from high school I didn't want hearing about how great my ride was that day, and also my belly dancer sister whose photos I couldn't show my husband.

    I vote you unfriend.
    A helmet saved my life.

    2014 goal: learn to ride like TheHorseProblem, er, a barn rat!



  14. #34
    Join Date
    Nov. 8, 2005
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    2,236

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    Quote Originally Posted by Superminion View Post
    Maybe he can't quite figure out how to comment? Sounds a lot like my Grandma...

    I don't think that you're off base though. If you have a bad feeling about somebody, it's always better to act on it than ignore it!
    I concur on both counts. I have some aged relatives who took forever to get the hang of replying to posts, posting on a wall and sending PM's. Things were always in the wrong place for the longest time.

    FWIW, while I respect intuition, I don't see anything even slightly amiss with his comments.
    If I knew what I were doing, why would I take lessons?

    "Things should be as simple as possible,
    but no simpler." - Einstein



  15. #35
    Join Date
    Jun. 16, 2007
    Location
    Somewhere Under the Radar
    Posts
    475

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    I think your gut is telling you that it could become inappropriate. Or that he has the capacity to go there. Or wishes he could. Or something.

    Definitely annoying.



  16. #36
    Join Date
    Aug. 15, 2008
    Posts
    4,586

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    I think the main question is, do you think he'd leave a giant stink in your bathroom weekly like the last guy who was crushing you? Cause that guy set the "inappropriate bar" pretty low.

    Totally razzing you.

    Block him and be done.
    "Aye God, Woodrow..."


    1 members found this post helpful.

  17. #37
    Join Date
    Dec. 4, 2005
    Location
    washington state
    Posts
    8,030

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    Ermahgerd I loff you Lololol!!! Ahahaahaaahaaaaaa!!!

    I saw Poop Boy last week at church. I think he has moved on
    The Knotted Pony

    Proud and upstanding member of the Snort and Blow Clique.



  18. #38
    Join Date
    Jul. 17, 2007
    Location
    Landrum, SC
    Posts
    1,763

    Default

    If he sends you messages and then deletes the conversation, his wife isn't able to see he was sending messages in the first place. Right?

    Nothing offensive about what he's written so far, but the idea he may be trying to hide communication with you... hmmm.
    Athletic Horses. Educated Riders.
    www.Ride-With-Confidence.com



  19. #39
    Join Date
    Aug. 12, 2010
    Location
    Westford, Massachusetts
    Posts
    3,809

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    To me, messages 2 and 4 in your examples sound like he's trying to establish some intimacy that really isn't there in your relationship.

    Anyway, all that really matters is that the contact is making you uncomfortable. Doesn't matter what his intentions are, really. I don't use Facebook myself, but if someone were making me feel uncomfortable, I'd probably just "unfriend" them so they couldn't contact me...unless there is a business or social reason why that would be a problem. In that case, I'd let him know you aren't comfortable with the nature contact...if he didn't respect that and persisted, THEN unfriend him.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  20. #40
    Join Date
    Oct. 2, 2012
    Posts
    1,832

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    I demand a link to the Poop Boy thread!
    A helmet saved my life.

    2014 goal: learn to ride like TheHorseProblem, er, a barn rat!



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