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  1. #41
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    Jun. 24, 2004
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    South Park
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    ?????
    Quote Originally Posted by ponyrider212 View Post
    At this point, I wish I could do this. But her boarding contract is with the barn, not me, and the barn manager is insisting on the 30 days notice. They can take the horse whenever they want, but the barn manager will insist they pay for the while month. None of the board money goes to me, and I will lose nothing more from the arrangement at this point. I have other horses for my students to ride. I was trying to help out the family by using her for my lessons, which actually meant that my lesson fees were halved to cover them not paying for their lessons.
    A friend told me I was delusional. I almost fell off my unicorn.



  2. #42
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    May. 5, 2009
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    Location: Indiana, but my heart is in Zone II
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    Quote Originally Posted by ponyrider212 View Post
    At this point, I wish I could do this. But her boarding contract is with the barn, not me, and the barn manager is insisting on the 30 days notice. They can take the horse whenever they want, but the barn manager will insist they pay for the while month. None of the board money goes to me, and I will lose nothing more from the arrangement at this point. I have other horses for my students to ride. I was trying to help out the family by using her for my lessons, which actually meant that my lesson fees were halved to cover them not paying for their lessons.
    I'm confused. You are not the OP, AwP is. Or do you have 2 screen names? Am I missing something?
    Come to the dark side, we have cookies



  3. #43
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    Sep. 7, 2009
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    Lexington, KY
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    Been there, done that. She won't care if you did things for her gratis. Just give her notice to be out and be happy that it didn't go on longer than it did.
    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant


    1 members found this post helpful.

  4. #44
    Join Date
    Jun. 14, 2006
    Location
    VA
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    11,372

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    If the board contract is with a 3rd party and you have no financial "dog in the fight" for the next 30 days, let it go. I love that AFGO phrase! I had one of those this week too. Sucks to feel taken advantage of, but really, it's no skin off your nose financially now.

    Turn this around for a moment: If the mother had notified you that they were giving 30 days notice and stopping lessons because child was no longer interested or they could not longer afford horse ownership but had thanked you for all you've done thus far, would you feel differently?

    My guess is that you would because it seems that this is more about not feeling appreciated.

    As far as email, I prefer using email for business/horse related correspondence because then everything is in writing and cannot be twisted around. Phone conversations have a way of being misremembered. Even unintentionally.
    A good horseman doesn't have to tell anyone...the horse already knows.

    Might be a reason, never an excuse...


    1 members found this post helpful.

  5. #45
    Join Date
    Sep. 2, 2005
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    Upstate NY
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pennywell Bay View Post
    I'm confused. You are not the OP, AwP is. Or do you have 2 screen names? Am I missing something?
    Same question applies to this post too. Do you have two screen names?

    Quote Originally Posted by ponyrider212 View Post
    What JanM said above is right on the mark. They didn't want to pay anything for a lease or to buy an appropriate horse and expected to find the perfect situation without paying a dime. The mother even asked me at one point if the barn would buy another horse so that her daughter could take lessons on it.

    I'm sure the mother may be wondering what hit her. I know I am to blame here for letting this happen. The problem is that I hit a wall with them--this camel's back has been broken!--and I can't just blithely continue on with how things were. I am supposed to see them for a lesson tomorrow, and told the mother that to keep everything as clear as possible in the last month, she will need to pay for her lessons and any other services I provide since I won't be using the horse for other lessons. They can do what they want with that.
    I do not really find it strange that a mother might ask if the barn plans on getting any new horses that might be more appropriate for their kid.
    It is not so much a mother saying 'accommodate my kid at your expense' but a mother wondering if there is now a need for them to either find their own pony or maybe a different program with a pony that might work better.
    Last edited by trubandloki; Jan. 31, 2013 at 01:18 PM. Reason: Removed the quote


    1 members found this post helpful.

  6. #46
    Join Date
    Jul. 14, 2000
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    NM
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    1,549

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    trubandloki - just an FYI - Several posters have noticed that the old quote feature doesn't work the same way it used to. When and if the OP changes the original post, the quote also changes. You have to copy and paste and use a different font to call it out and to make sure it stays the same...


    2 members found this post helpful.

  7. #47
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    Aug. 14, 2004
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    7,539

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    i am not sure i understand the need of some folks to copy and paste "just in case" ....

    to the OP: you have been given some good advice... you cant retro charge for stuff in the past - that is bad business .. but you can and should print up a price sheet and charge a fair fee for everything going forward.

    i have learned the hard way that people respect you to teh degree you respect yourself.... so if you think you are worth zero - so will your clients if you think you are worth paying then so will they.

    good luck.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  8. #48
    Join Date
    Mar. 4, 2007
    Location
    Western Washington
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    2,976

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    Quote Originally Posted by aWp View Post
    Okay, just got another email from the mom; she agrees training rides are pointless moving forward. I replied that if the horse isn't going to be doing anything between lessons, then it's not safe for me to use her for the other 2 lessons (the daughter rides on the two days I have my 2 other lessons, which means the green horse will do nothing for 5 days out of the cold, winter week), and that she will therefore need to pay me for lessons/training rides/lunges moving forward as of February 1st. I explained that I can't put the safety of my other students at risk if the horse is sitting for 5 days a week. If she wants me to get on the horse to make sure she's safe during her daughter's allotted lesson times, I told her I would be happy to. Then I sent her the link with the barn's rate sheet on it, so she can see what the fees are, so that way there is no confusion for the month moving forward.
    I am a little confused by this. You want the mother to pay you for training rides so you can use the horse for your other students? And if you don't do the training rides, the horse isn't safe for your other students? If that's the case, why wouldn't you do them?



  9. #49
    Join Date
    Jan. 18, 2010
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    163

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    Sorry, I'm using a shared computer at the barn, and didn't realize I need to log out and back in under my screen name. I'm not ponyrider212, but I accidentally posted under that name. Sorry for any confusion!

    As for the working arrangement, I teach and help manage the barn where I now. I am not the barn manager and receive no part of the board from anyone.



  10. #50
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    Feb. 5, 2002
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    2,067

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    I decided a long time ago that "volunteering has to be voluntary." I take that to mean, for my use, that anything I do for anyone else comes with no strings attached = no expectation of thanks, gratitude, payback, karma, returned favors, or anything else. If I'm unwilling to do it "for free" then I either need to not do it, or discuss my "price" in advance. For me, this works -- yesterday I changed blankets on another boarder's horse because she asked, and I knew it wasn't someone I'd ask for a return favor, but I did it anyway. In another recent situation, someone asked me to do a favor for them and I said no, because it would have involved more time/effort than I was willing to extend "for free." I've been in similar situations to the OP, and had to learn to set some boundaries up front as well as letting go of the small stuff as it came along. And I always hope that maybe I'm setting a sort of silent example for a kid who might not think about it now, but later on in life they'll say "I remember when my instructor did all kinds of extra stuff for me when I couldn't do it for myself, and now I'm going to do that for another kid."


    2 members found this post helpful.

  11. #51
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    Aug. 15, 2008
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    4,589

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    So you share a barn computer with someone who thinks a trainer screwed them because their horse grew too big, got mad and deleted all of their posts, eh?
    "Aye God, Woodrow..."


    5 members found this post helpful.

  12. #52
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    Aug. 15, 2008
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    For the record gang, before anyone thinks I'm being mean, here is a screen shot of the contact email for ponyrider212, who she "shares" a computer with at the barn.

    http://i45.tinypic.com/17d1cn.png

    Weirdly familiar.
    "Aye God, Woodrow..."


    1 members found this post helpful.

  13. #53
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    Jun. 7, 2006
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    Hahaha!

    When will people learn?
    Nothing gets past COTH.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  14. #54
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    Jan. 18, 2010
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    163

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    Hi, yes, we have a shared computer here at the barn where I work. There are several boarders and clients who use the computer and lots of kids too while their siblings take lessons etc.

    Long Spot, that is kind of weird about the email address!

    I'm not sure, though, how this is relevant to the thread at hand? I know COTH can be mean, and if you'd like to flame me for what I've written about my situation, feel free. Otherwise, I don't understand how what some else at my barn wrote pertains to my situation.

    Hasn't anyone else forgotten to log off a shared computer before ?



  15. #55
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    Sep. 18, 2003
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    4,582

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    Quote Originally Posted by aWp View Post
    Long Spot, that's kind of weird about the email address!
    Up next ... the drunken houseguest.
    __________________________
    "... if you think i'm MAD, today, of all days,
    the best day in ten years,
    you are SORELY MISTAKEN, MY LITTLE ANCHOVY."


    7 members found this post helpful.

  16. #56
    Join Date
    Sep. 2, 2005
    Location
    Upstate NY
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    12,751

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bells View Post
    trubandloki - just an FYI - Several posters have noticed that the old quote feature doesn't work the same way it used to. When and if the OP changes the original post, the quote also changes. You have to copy and paste and use a different font to call it out and to make sure it stays the same...
    Thank you, Bells. I had not noticed that change. I appreciate the heads up.

    I wonder if it works if you manually quote, which does not have the posters name and post associated with it?

    i am not sure i understand the need of some folks to copy and paste "just in case" ....
    Because some posters have a habit of going back and removing every post they made in a thread when they get angry. Quote used to keep a record of what was posted so the people commenting do not look totally silly when the OP either deletes or edits their posts.



    Am I the only one who does not have a barn computer? Seems weird to have a common barn computer.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  17. #57
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    Jun. 7, 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by aWp View Post
    Hi, yes, we have a shared computer here at the barn where I work. There are several boarders and clients who use the computer and lots of kids too while they're siblings take lessons etc.
    Double down!


    This is a very unique feature for a barn to have.

    And one of these individuals is ranting online about getting screwed by their trainer because their horse grew too tall?


    2 members found this post helpful.

  18. #58
    Join Date
    Dec. 28, 2001
    Location
    over yonder
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    2,967

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    Quote Originally Posted by meupatdoes View Post
    Double down!


    This is a very unique feature for a barn to have.

    And one of these individuals is ranting online about getting screwed by their trainer because their horse grew too tall?
    And another individual is ranting about her client and the clueless mother
    Auventera Two:Some women would eat their own offspring if they had some dipping sauce.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  19. #59
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    Aug. 15, 2008
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    If I'm remembering correctly, the person with the horse that got too big also taught a few lessons.

    So, given the email address, I'm going with one and the same.

    OP, for the record, you might want to hide the email address for the aWp screen name. That one is your real name.
    "Aye God, Woodrow..."


    1 members found this post helpful.

  20. #60
    Join Date
    May. 5, 2009
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    Location: Indiana, but my heart is in Zone II
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    So are you the trainer Ponyrider 212 posted about or are there just crazies at your barn? If I was PR212, I'd never have let it be known I posted on COTH when I am writing things about trainers................Interesting.

    http://www.chronofhorse.com/forum/sh...w-what-do-I-do

    LongSpot, I was typing as you posted. =)
    Come to the dark side, we have cookies



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