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  1. #61
    Join Date
    Aug. 26, 2012
    Location
    MO
    Posts
    49

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    Over The Hill, your story sounds completely plausible to me. I've had the sh*t hit the fan a couple of times in my life and had to scramble to cover the basics for my animals.

    You have gotten some excellent advice here, both short and long term solutions. Please accept the help offered here until you get solvent and get your situation straightened out. Then pay it forward when you are in the position to help someone.

    I have lived in FL and know one way to sell stuff fast and get cash in hand. If you can get gas in the truck, load up all your horse stuff for sale and any small household things you want to sell. Go to the nearest highly traveled intersection where horse people are likely to be near. Make a sign for horse tack, cheap, and put some of it out where it is easily seen. They sell everything beside the road in FL, fruit, flowers, shrimp, art, meat, so people are used to stopping for deals. Take a friend along for safety if you feel vulnerable doing it alone. Put reasonable prices on stuff and I guarantee you will sell it. This will be a lot faster than advertising, taking calls, meeting people, etc.

    Good luck. I hope 2013 is kinder to you.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  2. #62
    Join Date
    Aug. 9, 2007
    Posts
    9,024

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LauraKY View Post
    My scam alert isn't going off and it's not often wrong. The best thing to do is if someone could deliver the food, feed, cat food and maybe a can of gas.
    Yes, although I've been had before on coth, viva la france!, and by the rescue which shall not be named, I don't want hungry horses IF it is not a scam. I don't understand how families can ignore their kin, but that's because I come from 2 big southern families where there are enough people that someone can help others, even if a few are selfish.

    So we need to know where OP is. Is she NW of Orlando where there is a lot of rural area? We need a feed store, someone living near there, etc. If she were up here near Savannah, I'd get some of Cloudy and Hattie's peanut hay and go by. Even though our local drunks are already out driving around.

    Punkie, if you go, PM me and I can paypal you some money for you to buy stuff for kitties and horses. I am in and out as friends are here and we've got plans, but I'll check in if I can. Anyway, I will definitely check in early AM before going to barn, so that I can paypal anyone who goes to OP's some cash to help out.

    People who ignore their parents (assuming the parents were good parents) are not nice. And coateen, the coth crayola posse needs to go visit those sons of OP.

    BTW OP, I've been known to call TV reporters and newspaper reporters to get help for people. Stories like yours are what reporters like to air: A struggling woman with animals. So if you want, PM me and I'll get the media to see if they will air your story to try to get someone to give you a job.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  3. #63
    Join Date
    Dec. 12, 2004
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    6,316

    Default

    I will gladly chip in a little bit, either a call to a feed store or a mailed grocery store card or whatever else will help. Punkie, if you end up going anywhere, I'd gladly Paypal you some money.



  4. #64
    Join Date
    Oct. 15, 2011
    Posts
    1,107

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by magicteetango View Post
    OP what about a room mate?
    This is an excellent suggestion if you own your own place that can really help you til you get on your feet. Craiglist has a "room for rent" section, just be really careful of scammers and screening people (meet in public the first few times you meet, and all that).
    *Wendy* 4.17.73 - 12.20.05



  5. #65
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 1999
    Location
    Central FL
    Posts
    4,379

    Default

    Another Floridian who would be happy to help/send help if I knew which area of Florida .



  6. #66
    Join Date
    Feb. 16, 2007
    Location
    My very own sliver of heaven.
    Posts
    1,282

    Default

    Still waiting to hear back. I know that Sparr is open until 5 and TSC is open until 6. I think a few other local places are open regular hours (Seminole and United, maybe). I have kitty food and hay here that I can bring, but no grain. So, OP, if you're seeing this, I want to help. Do get in touch!
    Nine out of ten times, you'll get it wrong...but it's that tenth time that you get it right that makes all the difference.



  7. #67
    Join Date
    Nov. 1, 2007
    Location
    ....in a classroom in Fl, by the ocean
    Posts
    3,688

    Default

    I can do that too. Just need an address.


    Quote Originally Posted by Heinz 57 View Post
    If someone can get the OP to PM an address, I'd be more than happy to go fill a flat-rate USPS box with all the non-perishable food items I can fit in it.



  8. #68
    Join Date
    Nov. 1, 2007
    Location
    ....in a classroom in Fl, by the ocean
    Posts
    3,688

    Default

    If you are in the Tampa Bay area OP. Let me know. I have a fridge full of veggies and I dont mind sharing.



  9. #69
    Join Date
    Apr. 25, 2002
    Posts
    355

    Default

    OP, DEFINITELY consider the roommate idea. If it's remotely possible, I'd even consider that before the reverse mortgage if you could possibly manage with the additional income. (Not that the reverse mortgage is a terrible idea - I realize that there are situations which might force it but a roommate might give you enough breathing room to find another way).



  10. #70
    Join Date
    Jun. 30, 2006
    Location
    SF Bay Area, California
    Posts
    4,297

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by GoForAGallop View Post
    I will gladly chip in a little bit, either a call to a feed store or a mailed grocery store card or whatever else will help. Punkie, if you end up going anywhere, I'd gladly Paypal you some money.
    Me too!
    Proud owner of a Slaughter-Bound TB from a feedlot, and her surprise baby...!
    http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e350/Jen4USC/fave.jpg
    http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e3...SC/running.jpg



  11. #71
    Join Date
    Oct. 25, 2012
    Posts
    3,973

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    OP, there is a longer-term solution here for you, and you're sitting in the middle of it!

    If you own a farm free and clear and have no debts, you have a lot more flexibility than you realize and you most certainly do not need to live on the edge of starvation out of pride.

    Get thee to a banker--preferably, if they still exist, the one who once held the mortgage on your place. Go prepared with a full accounting of your income and expenses and what you feel you would need to stabilize your situation. There are many kinds of financial instruments, not least of which are 2nd mortgages or reverse mortgages, which could put your land to work for you and massively ease your burden. Also, there is not a thing dishonorable about the informed, responsible use of credit cards as needed in the case of unbudgeted expenses--especially in lieu of letting horses, dogs, and you go unfed. Talking with qualified, financially literate people may be the biggest thing you need to do.

    Another is to try and find a way to make money with your farm. Not knowing your physical condition, I don't know how much you can take on, but if there is the possibility of boarders, lessons, or leasing land for growing crops or for someone else to graze stock that might be another avenue to explore.

    I lurk these board a lot more than I post; but one recurrent theme lately, any time there's an OT day on COTH and on all kinds of other chatboards as well, seems to be the "he left me, now I'm helpless and destitute" story. For older women, I can understand how the expectations you were raised with have come crashing down with the New Reality.

    For anyone younger than 60, though, there is NO excuse to believe any man has a reason to "keep" you for life, no matter what you've put into a relationship. Simply put, basing your financial future (whether you can eat!) on a sexual relationship is to build a house on the ultimate pile of sand. Men today in this "hookup" culture can "get some" anywhere and everywhere, and it costs them nothing--no commitment, no effort, no emotional investment, and sure as shootin' no paycheck. We wanted equality, we got it, and we are ON OUR OWN.

    I just cringe when I see parents indulging their little daughters in all that Disney-princess sh*!. There IS no "Prince Charming." He isn't coming. Be your OWN Prince Charming or you are a fool.
    I hate to see that stupid dependent myth foisted off on another generation of trainwrecked victims of "love."

    OP, the new year will bring you better things--but you've gotta go after 'em yourself. You are NOT ruined OR helpless--unless you believe you are!

    Get back on the horse.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  12. #72
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 2011
    Posts
    2,966

    Default

    Guys - she did post back that she was able to get to the feed store & has enough hay & feed for the horses for a week. So while she still needs help, it's not holiday-desperate anymore.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  13. #73
    Join Date
    Nov. 8, 2005
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    2,231

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bacardi1 View Post
    Guys - she did post back that she was able to get to the feed store & has enough hay & feed for the horses for a week. So while she still needs help, it's not holiday-desperate anymore.
    Though there are other non-equine critters.

    We can't save the whole world, we can only when circumstances permit help to rescue those parts most important to us.
    If I knew what I were doing, why would I take lessons?

    "Things should be as simple as possible,
    but no simpler." - Einstein



  14. #74
    Join Date
    Aug. 30, 2007
    Location
    Sunny Florida
    Posts
    744

    Default

    Wow...I will be writing all night, trying to answer all the pms and to continue the update.

    I have just got back from a 2 1/2 hour trip to deliver an item that I had for sale. I got less than 1/2 of what I asked for it, and then had to make that trip, but now have some cash on hand.

    To those of you who think I am less than on the up-and-up, please feel free to go back to review my posting history regarding what has gone on in my life over the past three years.

    I have had so many offers to help that it makes me weep. I really didn't post with the expectation of having my hand out. I think, at times like these, what we all need is to know that somewhere someone knows you are here. And that others know what you are going through and that if they post, then they are still here, so there is hope. I guess that sounds dumb.

    I have had a lot of good suggestions about how to attack my problems. I plan to fully explore every option.

    What I have decided to do is to go ahead with the reverse mortgage, that will help put me right-side-up again. Use a little of the money to make improvements in the cottage, and put the place on the market, quietly at first, but with the end plan of selling within three years. Put the rest away so that I have a ready downpayment for the place I eventually find. I have found that 10 acres is a lot of property to upkeep when you are doing it alone. I don't need 10 acres, and wherever I decide to go , you can bet it will not be as rural as this property is. I will find a job. I thought I could do my transcription from here, but alas, no high speed internet, no DSL which is really a prerequisite. When I asked my telephone repairman about DSL, he just laughed. You need population for DSL. We have cows. But there is something somewhere for me, and I will find it.

    As to the children, I have often said "it is what it is" but now I have to convince myself of that and just move on.

    I sincerely thank each and every one of you for your posts on this thread. I will answer pms tonight if it kills me . . . and I will let you know as things get better.
    "I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you..."


    4 members found this post helpful.

  15. #75
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 2011
    Posts
    2,966

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adamantane View Post
    Though there are other non-equine critters.
    That's true, but I can't help but believe that if she made it to the feed store, that they also had something for dogs & cats. I've yet to find a hay/feed store that didn't also carry pet food.



  16. #76
    Join Date
    Oct. 3, 2002
    Location
    Boogerville, USA
    Posts
    858

    Default I haven't read all of this, but ...

    I understand completely. I am in a dire situation as well; if anything, perhaps worse off. The stress of no money (trying to sell good horse things on eBay for cheap ~ watchers, no buyers), is making me crazy. I always fear where the $$ for the next bag of horse feed or round bale will come from. I am literally living on peanut butter and ramen noodles.

    I wish I would just drop dead. I am just so tired of worrying and crying. I pray for the money to get my old horse's front shoes pulled - it's been 12 weeks!!
    I am ready just to have the vet come out, do the deed and be done with it all.
    Then I can finally go and be at peace.
    LOTS more bad stuff, but that is the jist of it: One step forward, three steps sliding back.

    I truly, TRULY feel your pain and hopelessness.


    I hope your situation will improve. I no longer hope or care that mine will; I just want the pain and worrying to end.
    Last edited by nasalberry; Dec. 31, 2012 at 07:15 PM.



  17. #77
    Join Date
    Jul. 15, 2006
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    815

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nasalberry View Post
    I understand completely. I am in a dire situation as well; if anything worse off. The stress of no money (trying to sell good horse things on eBay for cheap ~ watchers, no buyers), is making me crazy. I always fear where to $$ for the next bag of horse feed or round bale will come from. I am literally living on peanut butter and ramen noodles.

    I wish I would just drop dead. I am just so tired of worrying and crying. I pray for the money to get my old horse's front shoes pulled - it's been 12 weeks!!
    I am ready just to have the vet come out, do the deed and be done with it all.
    Then I can finally go and be at peace.
    LOTS more bad stuff, but that is the jist of it: One step forward, three steps sliding back.

    I truly, TRULY feel your pain and hopelessness.


    I hope your situation will improve. I no longer hope or care that mine will; I just want the pain and worrying to end.

    The advise given to the other posters in dire need also apply to you. I don't know where you are, or what your situation is but I will help in any way I can.
    Where are you?How many horses? Cats/Dogs/Fish? Biggest problems right now? Feel free to PM me the specifics and I will do what I can to help out.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  18. #78
    Join Date
    Mar. 6, 2002
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    5,674

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nasalberry View Post
    . I am literally living on peanut butter and ramen noodles.
    I can help with this. Please, ferchrissake, PM me your address.
    What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what
    lies with in us. - Emerson


    1 members found this post helpful.

  19. #79
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 2011
    Posts
    2,966

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nasalberry View Post
    I understand completely. I am in a dire situation as well; if anything, perhaps worse off. The stress of no money (trying to sell good horse things on eBay for cheap ~ watchers, no buyers), is making me crazy. I always fear where the $$ for the next bag of horse feed or round bale will come from. I am literally living on peanut butter and ramen noodles.

    I wish I would just drop dead. I am just so tired of worrying and crying. I pray for the money to get my old horse's front shoes pulled - it's been 12 weeks!!
    I am ready just to have the vet come out, do the deed and be done with it all.
    Then I can finally go and be at peace.
    LOTS more bad stuff, but that is the jist of it: One step forward, three steps sliding back.

    I truly, TRULY feel your pain and hopelessness.


    I hope your situation will improve. I no longer hope or care that mine will; I just want the pain and worrying to end.
    Are you the same "Nasalberry" that had her own rather sarcastic/& sometimes somewhat nasty forum over on the old "Manure Pile" website? So sorry to hear that things have changed so much for you.

    Please don't wish that you'll drop dead. That is NOT the answer. Not for you, & not for your critter(s), friends, & loved ones. I know that it's an old song-&-dance, but do call an anonymous hotline if you really feel that way. You may not feel it now, but life is precious, regardless of how difficult it may appear at the moment.
    Last edited by Bacardi1; Dec. 31, 2012 at 07:54 PM.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  20. #80
    Join Date
    Sep. 7, 2009
    Location
    Lexington, KY
    Posts
    16,949

    Default

    Nasalberry, can you post your approximate location? I'm guessing there's a kind COTHER near you who can at least get your horse's shoes pulled.

    Plenty of us are willing to help. What do you need.

    BTW, I know she has some items for sale on Ebay. Maybe the mods will allow her to post the link.
    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant



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