[magicteetango]

So on Christmas Eve, DH and I headed over to MIL's big holiday gathering with DS1 and DS2. The roads were quite bad and we considered turning around half way there anyway. And I will be honest... I didn't want to go anyway and it may be making me more irritated than I should be.

One of my step BIL's kids was very sick. No one so much as gave a heads up and I didn't know until after my son ran over and gave him hugs and kisses. He wasn't snotty but looked very ill and they later gave him tylenol. MIL mentions just in passing halfway through that he was sick.

The last play date we had my son had a snotty nose so I texted MIL and asked if she could make sure everyone still wanted to come since my son could get their kids sick. She acted like I was nuts and said they wouldn't care because their kids go to daycare and it is the same. My sons do not currently go to daycare if that makes a difference.

Well two days later DS1 just puked all over me (and him) and had the chills. He was very fussy this AM and now I guess I know why. I am supposed to go see my side of the family on Sunday (including my dad who has not yet met my younger son) but who knows if DS1 will feel up for it and if he seems contagious I will stay home.

IS IT SO MUCH TO ASK THAT YOU EITHER DO NOT TAKE YOUR SICK KIDS PLACES OR YOU AT LEAST GIVE A HEADS UP/NOT PLUCK HIM DOWN WITH ALL THE OTHER KIDS?? Sorry... it is 11pm, I just cleaned us both up... he now shows no signs of sleeping and I am super cranky (and seriously wondering if I am the weird one).

[Come Shine]

People seriously do not understand about keeping their sick kids home. We had dinner at a Swiss Chalet recently and asked to be moved to a different table because a kid was coughing up a lung. Felt terrible for the little tyke.

Hope your kidlets feel better soon.

[carp]

I get really PO'ed when people bring their sick kids to gatherings. Jeepers folks, never mind getting the other kids sick. Grandma doesn't have the immune system she once did; she doesn't need pneumonia and a hospital visit as her Xmas present from your family. And I sure as hell don't need to be starting my busy season at work with your kid's infection.

[rustbreeches]

Hate it! Hate it when people go to anything sick. And I will mention how much I appreciate them thinking their skating lesson or whatever is more important than not being Typhoid Mary. It is rude and inconsiderate and senselessly jeopardizes people

Worse was when DH, DD and I went to his brother's house for nephew's b-day. They all had the flu, but didn't want to cancel the party. Guess what we were doing 2 days later?

[Miss J]

I think you should have had a heads up. I am sicker than a dog right now, and went to moms for dinner Christmas eve stating I was sick, I could come later, but she insisted I come, so I did. No hugs or hand shakes from me, I stayed far away as possible.

Especially if you have to work with other people, it's not fair to show up sick and give everyone else cooties.

[GraceLikeRain]

I totally understand that sometimes it is not feasible to reschedule or hire a nanny. However, a quick "kid isn't feeling terribly well today so don't mind if we maintain a mini bubble" is always appreciated. I'm always one to scoop up toddlers or go run around and play with friends kid's so they can socialize. I love doing it but I always feel a twinge of irritation when it isn't until after I've bottled and burped the baby that they mention she was up all night throwing up. Ugh.

[Come Shine]

My Mother used to be the worst. She would brag about how she would go into work even when she was 'on her deathbed'. I would always tell her that no one appreciated her going into work sick but she was convinced that everyone thought she was ultra-amazing to be there, despite being so obviously ill. Thank goodness she is retired now. I always felt so bad for her co-workers.

[Wayside]

Ugh, I loathe that. My SIL is always bringing her snot-nosed brats to family gatherings even when they're sick. And they always seem to get us sick. Yuck, yuck, yuck.

And DH's family was mad when I insisted that we not go to a family gathering a few years ago because my son was sick. DH's dad had just had a bone marrow transplant, and as much as the guy irks me sometimes, I didn't want to be responsible for him catching pneumonia and dying!

[S1969]

However, a quick "kid isn't feeling terribly well today so don't mind if we maintain a mini bubble" is always appreciated.

This is how I feel, but aside from the poor kids feeling miserable, I don't necessarily think they should stay at home. The chances of you or your kids picking up these same viruses from the school bus or grocery store are pretty darn great already.

Granted, me and my kids are rarely sick, so perhaps I'd feel differently if we were. But I do feel bad that people drag their sick kids out of the house. I can recall a few times of being pretty sick with the flu or strep throat and I just wanted to be in bed.

[lilitiger2]

I totally,completely agree!! Or they bring them HERE! A nightmare - they carry in "little Mark" still in his PJs ("oh he's been really sick, throwing up all night but he can just sleep on the couch and watch TV while we sweat!"...) aaaaah, thanks! Or, a related note, if a toddler is just learning to use the potty, why don't you HELP?? As in, it is not fun to go in to my bathroom, or have a guest tell me that there is poop all over the side of the toilet or piss all over the floor...a little supervision would be awesome!

[gabby.gator]

this is my ex DIL to the "t"......... she's the mother of three of our grands, one of whom is ALWAYS sick. she just trucks them here there and everywhere :-(. the kids just pass what ever it is from one to another and back again, ugh.

this year we sent out word that we could not have any sick company for the holidays as my husband is immuno (sp) compromised, and HAD to be protected from any germs. accomplished two things-- no drama filled visit and no worries about what they might spread to him!

[CVPeg]

Not kids, although totally agree with you. But my elderly mother gets semi-frequent visits to the ER for UTIs. And I'm the nearest child. Can't tell you how many times I've been really sick a few days after being around to keep her calm in the ER. Only benefit to that is, I'm not allowed then, to be in the home to visit.

[magicteetango]

I don't necessarily think every snotty nose requires a child be kept home but as someone else said, a heads up and try to keep the child in it's own "bubble" if possible. I have taken the boys places if someone had a cold or something very minor, I am not a germaphobe, but it should be IMO my choice. But this little man looked very sick and seemed pretty miserable.

I finally got DS down around 12 and he woke up every hour at first so I am pretty tired but he seems to be doing okay this morning so hopefully it is nothing too serious. I have felt a bit under the weather since we went and I never get sick, DH does as well but he has the immune system of a flea so I can't use him to gauge how bad it is lol.

Now granted if DS2 gets sick (3mo old) I will be livid but so far so good on that end. Glad I am not the only one who feels this way!

[SkipHiLad4me]

This is one of my biggest pet peeves and it isn't just children, it's adults! I've only worked at my current place of employment for a few years and I don't accrue a lot of leave time yet. It drives me crazy when people will insist on coming to work with all kinds of crud and disease when I know that they have WEEKS of sick leave and annual leave on the books. Their excuses range from "I'd rather save my vacation time for when I'm healthy/the weather is nice/etc" to "I can't get any rest at home with my kids there anyway". REALLY??? Well thanks for being selfish by not taking leave, thus exposing all of your fellow coworkers to your diseases.

[Canaqua]

Ugh. I can't stand that either. I've always used the general daycare/school rules to decide whether a sick child should even leave the house and be in public (they have a list including no fever for 24 hours WITHOUT fever reducing medication, etc...). Now, a cold won't necessarily prevent a child from going about their business, it's not something you miss school over, but, if I'm visiting someone's home, I always tell them first, even with just a cold, since you never know what is going on in their house at the time...someone could be immune compromised, very elderly, have a tiny baby, etc... I let the host make the call on what they are willing to expose their family to.

Coworkers sometimes make me angry on illness too. Everyone in my immediate area is allowed to work from home if they are sick, so we don't even need to take a sick day if we are well enough to work, but potentially contagious...so STAY HOME. One woman used to come in quite sick (fever, coughing, vomiting in the ladies room), I think she thought she'd get brownie points or something...until we shamed her about it..."You are NOT a hero because you come in sick, you are selfish, STOP IT".

[Superminion]

My MIL/SIL are AWFUL about this. She chose not to vaccinate her son, and he's always freakin' sick. They are usually always there when we make the trip down, but nobody will tell me when he's sick, because they don't want us to cancel our trip. But then, if DD has the sniffles, I get read the riot act because it's not nice to bring my sick kid around their unvaccinated kid. Even though I've TOLD them that she sick, and they always say "Oh no, it's fine, come on down!"

Drives me batshit crazy. The last gathering we went to, he had hand/foot/mouth and gave it to DD. That is not a fun sickness with a (then) 6 month old.

Jesus... at least let me know what we're walking into or something.

*headdesk*

[tle]

I used to work in a small office and shared an actual office with 1 other person. She was very nice but I still remember (and rant about) the one time one of her kids was too sick to go to school. Instead of staying home with him, SHE BROUGHT HIM TO WORK! Yes he was quiet... he slept most of the day, but he was doing so 5 feet from me! Not happy.

[EqTrainer]

It is amazing how people have different standards and ideas about this. My neighbors kids are *always* sick and seemingly always contagious and apparently it gives her no pause for concern, at all. Constant congestion, snot, sneezing, vomiting.. And yes, she will randomly mentioned that one of them vomited right after he or she gives you a hug and a kiss. It is so bad that my kids ask me to ask her if the kids are sick before they come over but you cannot always plan...

Like the day I picked them up from school, one told me he has vomited the night before (what about the 24 hour rule, hmmm?) and the other was running a low grade fever and lethargic... We were all UH OH OH SHIT and sure enough, sick in 48 hours.

I seriously think she should lock them in the house for a month and let it all burn itself out LOL

[S1969]

My MIL/SIL are AWFUL about this. She chose not to vaccinate her son, and he's always freakin' sick. They are usually always there when we make the trip down, but nobody will tell me when he's sick, because they don't want us to cancel our trip. But then, if DD has the sniffles, I get read the riot act because it's not nice to bring my sick kid around their unvaccinated kid. Even though I've TOLD them that she sick, and they always say "Oh no, it's fine, come on down!"

What sort of illness are they not vaccinating for? Generally people who don't vaccinate for things like chicken pox are not trying to avoid getting it either?

Or do you mean like a flu shot? Hand/foot/mouth does not have a vaccine...

Just curious; because most of the crap kids get can't be vaccinated against...

[spacytracy]

Hate it. We kept DD home from a party because she was hacking. She is still getting over it. Parents insisted we bring her on Christmas, but no kissing/ close contact.

Now I seem to be getting it. Which will mean probably no parties for us this weekend. But I don't think a present from Typhoid Mary is that nice.