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  1. #21
    Join Date
    May. 2, 2011
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    Texas
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    Quote Originally Posted by Larksmom View Post
    all those are indeed valid, but mom today said she would be in favor if she just pays utilities. I said no. [I am now POA for mom's finances btw, and sister for the medical stuff.] The Kid has been miserably spoiled, long story, her parents woul never be parents of the year. But I was thinking along the lines of helping her to become a grown up. She would NOT be allowed to move in until she had paid a deposit, and taken on utilities. I want her to learn to SAVE a bit of money which is hard to do in my family. Including me.
    Patty is the one who said she freaked about the $100. She was probably thinking I got it free for 2 years and now I have to pay? Still terrible if true. But I would hold her to it, and that is what my sister is afraid of. I am no starry eyed dreamer. But I aske and this is pretty much what i expected.
    The problem is, my sister hasn't worked for 4 years, and her hubby for over 10. So the kid comes by it by way of parents. Mom has been supporting sis since then to the tune of about $400 a month. My mom is a CLASSIC enabler, worse than cothers. So the kid isn't going to learn anything from them. Her boyfriend is working his first job at 20, and it is at said hamburger joint!
    I would like her to GROW UP and I see no other way.

    The reason I would like HER is I want no strangers! The house next door had renters twice, and the house had to be shoveled out. People are pigs. Especially when they rent. We have a vacant house. I insist she pay rent. I have a good friend that is a handy man, and we could pay him to fix stuff. I don't want to rent to a relative, but she is the best of a bad lot.
    OP, face it, your an enabler. DO NOT rent to her. Everyone here has stated that in one way or the other, and they are right. Piss her off now and remain family. Piss off the family when you are given the task of evicting her, and you are forever the bad guy. Forever.
    "How does it feel to be one of the beautiful people?" Julian Lennon


    2 members found this post helpful.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Oct. 20, 2005
    Posts
    2,807

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    Don't do it. I rent from my parents. PRIOR to renting from my parents, I lived on my own and learned how to pay utilities/make rent/budget/etc. Had I not had the opportunity to do so, I would have been a really shitty tenant for my parents to deal with.
    It's a uterus, not a clown car. - Sayyedati


    2 members found this post helpful.

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Dec. 31, 2000
    Location
    El Paso, TX
    Posts
    12,277

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    Don't do it. You will be the bad guy when you have to evict her, and she has no where to go. "Are you really going to put your realtive out in the street, in this weather?"

    It really isn't that hard to get a good renter. If you need help with websites to list on for free, or how you get credit bureaus pulled, or how to get good renters, pm me, and I'll help. i'm a Realtor and currently have 11 rental properties. Only had one late pmt in 12 yrs and that was about 1 1/2 weeks late. Places have always been left in decent shape, and I allow pets, with no breed restrictions.


    4 members found this post helpful.

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Jun. 24, 2005
    Location
    Alabama
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    8,215

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    Carp, Larksmom and Kathy S are so right. If you let this happen you will be very sorry. You will end up with a tenant, and the boyfriend, and heaven knows who else will move in to split the rent (actually pay all of the bills), and nothing will get paid for, and you will eventually have to evict them. Of course, they won't get evicted because everyone in the family will be whining about giving them more chances, and other excuses. And that will include your Mom, who already feels sorry for the girl.

    You'll end up with a trashed house, with more junk than ever and owing huge utility bills. Can someone her age even get utilities in their name without a credit history or a huge deposit, or a co-signer?

    What you should do is get the place cleaned up, and list it with a rental agency. If the girl can afford to rent it (and she can't), then she can become a legal tenant, and if something goes wrong the rental agency will get rid of her. I bet she can't come up with utility deposits anyway.

    This is a horrible idea, and you know that already, or you wouldn't have asked us about it. Jetsmom is so right. And you will end up the bad guy either way. Maybe you should just get the house cleaned up for now, and see how much work it will take to get it ready to rent or sell. Then make a decision.
    You can't fix stupid-Ron White


    3 members found this post helpful.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Feb. 23, 2005
    Location
    Spotsylvania, VA
    Posts
    12,820

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    The BIGGEST BY FAR mistake of my life was allowing Mr P's sister to rent our apartment.
    I wasn't always a Smurf
    Penmerryl's Sophie RIDSH
    "I ain't as good as I once was but I'm as good once as I ever was"
    The ignore list is my friend. It takes 2 to argue.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Dec. 1, 1999
    Location
    flyover country
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    1,935

    Default Ok, OK,

    I guess I knew the answer. But we just don't know what to do with the house. I hear SO MANY stories of crappy renters. The people next door to mom, well the house was rented out, twice, and you literally needed a shovel to throw away the crap.
    Jetsmom, when things settle around here a bit, I may very well take you up on your kind suggestion. We can't sell the house, because of mom's condition. We literally have to wait till she dies. I did speak to a lawyer, and he explained the legal nicieties, so I feel better about the selling, and of course, I don't care what they say on tv, the selling prices are still crap, so I am in no hurry there.
    What would be great would be to find a possible tenant who understands the circumstances, and rent with the POSSIBILITY to own.
    I rarely see this niece, and while she probably won't forget, and may well actually contact me, I will just say no.
    Another killer of threads


    1 members found this post helpful.

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Jan. 16, 2003
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    2,930

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    Jetsmom has been my real estate mentor. She gives good advice, so please contact her later. I think crappy renters are the exception, and we only hear about those. I have two rentals, and am going to look at a possible third today. My renters are great! One thing that helps a lot keeping your rentals in good condition is for the rental to be close to your house. No long-distance rentals! If you live a long way from the house, you may want a property management company to take charge of it. One of my rentals is right next door to my house. The other is a short distance from where I work, and the renter works where I work. Kind of hard for either to avoid me when the rent is due!
    It's 2014. Do you know where your old horse is?


    1 members found this post helpful.

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Aug. 12, 2010
    Location
    Westford, Massachusetts
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    3,485

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    NO! As the parent of kids in their early 20s, NO. Your niece's own mother is asking you not to enable her, DON'T. She is not going to grow up if you all make things easy her and allow her to continue to not take responsiblity for her life. No. No. No. If I were that child's mother and you allowed her to live rent free in that house against my wishes, I would be FURIOUS. I work hard not to enable my semi-grown kids, if someone else enables them, they are undoing all my hard work and painful boundary setting! My husband's ex does that with my stepson and it's made our lives extremely difficult and it's not doing stepson any favors either.

    If you want to help niece out, hire her to clean the house up so it can be rented to someone paying full market rent. Don't pay her by the hour, but a flat rate per "job". She'll make some extra money by actually earning it and you'll get the house ready for a real tenant if that's what you want. If she isn't interested in earning some cash, too bad, she can find another way to afford her $100 a month rent at BF's.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Sep. 18, 2003
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    4,513

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    Three things I have learned about rental property:
    1) The nicer the property, the better renters you'll get. By "nice" I don't mean fancy.

    OP, if you clean up your mom's house, make some minor repairs, paint the inside, rent it complete with appliances, etc., you can be much pickier about to whom to rent. Not all renters are pigs.

    2) On the first of the month, every renter gets a piece of paper -- a receipt for the rent or a written warning about eviction proceedings if they don't pay within 5 days.

    This sounds harsh, but it keeps everything on the up and up, with no misunderstanding about consequences. The bank expects us to pay the mortgage on time. Our renters have to do the same.


    3) Do NOT rent to relatives. If you give them a good deal, they're resentful. If you don't give them a discount, they think you're taking advantage of them. And there is hell to pay on several fronts if you have to tell them to get out.

    We learned this the hard way. Just don't do it.
    __________________________
    "... if you think i'm MAD, today, of all days,
    the best day in ten years,
    you are SORELY MISTAKEN, MY LITTLE ANCHOVY."


    2 members found this post helpful.

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Jun. 24, 2006
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    1,910

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    Only way she will grow up is if she has the motivation to stand on her own two feet. By enabling you are encouraging her not to take care of herself. She doesn't want to pay $100? Get an apartment and pay more then, that is adulthood.

    Anyway... my mom has had rental units for years and we have only had one really bad tenant. They are rarer than you would think.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  11. #31
    Join Date
    Aug. 2, 2004
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    Whidbey Is, Wash.
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    9,655

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    Put your mom's house with a rental agency. They screen renters, deal with evictions, know the ins and outs of landlord/tenant laws, and will handle legal matters.

    Absolutely don't rent to your niece.

    You can be your own landlord, but be prepared to do extensive background and credit checks through the companies that do those things, you can also get public records from the local LE agency, and be prepared to deal with shitty renters.

    Not all renters are shitty renters. I wasn't, and I've rented through the same company twice (pre- and post-divorce). DH wasn't either, in fact IMO DH has been gypped in the last two places he's rented: he rented property with a trailer and ran about 40 cows, improved the fence, dealt with well/water line emergencies on his own dime, etc, and barely got his security deposit back; in the last place, he shoveled out the "barn" to make it useable, repaired the roof, he fenced in and maintained an arena on the property on his own dime, repaired underground burst water lines, and there was a broken down tractor on the place that the landlady said if he was able to fix it, he could have it...he didn't get the tractor and it took her months to get him his deposit, when I was the one who cleaned out the barn (it was SPOTLESS) and we paid for a cleaning lady who does the Navy base housing move-outs to tackle the house. He was about to deploy, and she knew it.

    But if I had a decent house sitting around? I'd clean it out and store the furniture; paint everything (EVERYTHING), do some repairs, make sure appliances are all in working order, update locks and security and rent it out. I'm not shy about calling and giving 24 hour property check notices, whereas some people might be, and I know enough of the law to know what can/can't be done. I certainly would NOT rent to family, or if I did, I'd take the % cut and do it through an agency and let them be the meanies.
    Aisha, my heart from 03/06/1986 to 08/22/2008.

    COTH's official mini-donk enabler.
    Odie, aka the Evil Burrito, is on Facebook.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  12. #32
    Join Date
    Feb. 20, 2010
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    All 'round Canadia
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    I co-own 2 rental properties, and my partner has another 2. We've only had one tenant problem: bounced rent cheques eventually made good but coming later and later - they were given notice and left. It took a bit of time but formal eviction wasn't necessary, nor did they trash the house. On the whole renting has been a positive experience.

    We did make a "rental agency" page and everything is in our business name. I think people tend to be more professional when dealing with a "business" rather than an individual.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  13. #33
    Join Date
    Aug. 17, 2004
    Location
    Rixeyville, VA
    Posts
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    Has the OP checked with her mother's HO insurance company? Leaving a hourse vacant for too long can result in the cancellation of the HO policy. So you need to be doing something with the house -- like trying to rent it out.

    There has been lots of good advice given here. I have rented to two relatives twice and it worked. But we had contracts and dealt with the transaction like a business. It worked because we respected each other.

    There are also IRS rules about Fair Market Value on rentals If you give the niece a sweetheart deal, you may be causing tax consequences for your mother. Frankly the best thing you can do is to rent the house for its FMV rent to a non-family member. If you don't like dealing with tenants, then get an agency to deal with it.

    I have been a landlord for nearly 30 years. Most of my tenants have been terrific. I have also had some losers. But overall the experience has been positive.
    Last edited by IronwoodFarm; Dec. 27, 2012 at 04:39 PM.
    Where Norwegian Fjords Rule
    http://www.ironwood-farm.com


    1 members found this post helpful.

  14. #34
    Join Date
    Jun. 24, 2005
    Location
    Alabama
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    8,215

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    I would clean it up, and use a property management company to rent it out. They will screen the renters, you can set the terms (such as no pets), and any maintenance problems will be handled by the property managers also. No 3 a.m. phone calls about emergencies is a great thing, and worth every penny.

    And if she doesn't want to pay $100 a month to the BF's family, then you think she'll move in and pay utilities? I don't think that would work out at all, and you will very shortly have to spend the time and money to evict her, or else pay the utilities yourself. I bet she would need a co-signer for utilities anyway or else a huge deposit, so that wouldn't work either because she's broke.

    There simply aren't that many bad tenants out there, but I bet the niece would be bad, because since she's broke she'll need someone to pay her expenses, and that sounds like a chance to end up with some rather interesting roommates that won't pay either.
    You can't fix stupid-Ron White


    1 members found this post helpful.

  15. #35
    Join Date
    May. 13, 2008
    Location
    Western MA
    Posts
    595

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    I know you mean well in wanting to help her grow up and learn about the real world, but really, let the world do that itself. Let her try to move out of her BF's - and learn that she'll need firsts, lasts, security, and that she's going to be paying a HECK of a lot more than $100 a month.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  16. #36
    Join Date
    Jan. 11, 2007
    Location
    Central VA
    Posts
    1,399

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    I wouldn't do it either. However, I WOULD rent it out (to a non-family member). Clean it up, advertise it on CL and get two months rent as a deposit. That's what we do with our rental properties and we don't even check credit, we just ask to see proof of employment/income (and get employer's info in case we ever need to file a garnishment). The two months' deposit gives you enough of a cushion to evict them in a timely manner if they fail to pay the rent. Works for us, anyway, and most of our tenants have bad credit. Out of 9 rental properties we own, we've had few problems doing it this way. Most of our tenants have been reasonably clean and pay on time.
    Last edited by KPF; Dec. 27, 2012 at 12:52 PM.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  17. #37
    Join Date
    Jun. 24, 2005
    Location
    Alabama
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    Before renting to anyone, look at your state's rules for evictions, and the tenant-landlord rules to see if you want to do this.
    You can't fix stupid-Ron White


    1 members found this post helpful.

  18. #38
    Join Date
    Dec. 31, 2000
    Location
    El Paso, TX
    Posts
    12,277

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    Quote Originally Posted by pony4me View Post
    Jetsmom has been my real estate mentor. She gives good advice, so please contact her later. I think crappy renters are the exception, and we only hear about those. I have two rentals, and am going to look at a possible third today. My renters are great! One thing that helps a lot keeping your rentals in good condition is for the rental to be close to your house. No long-distance rentals! If you live a long way from the house, you may want a property management company to take charge of it. One of my rentals is right next door to my house. The other is a short distance from where I work, and the renter works where I work. Kind of hard for either to avoid me when the rent is due!
    I'm so happy to hear your rentals are doing well for you!



  19. #39
    Join Date
    Apr. 23, 1999
    Location
    Rosehill, TX
    Posts
    6,997

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    sell the house
    Nothing says "I love you" like a tractor. (Clydejumper)

    The reports states, “Elizabeth reported that she accidently put down this pony, ........, at the show.”



  20. #40
    Join Date
    Jul. 24, 2008
    Posts
    146

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    No...no...hell no!



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