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  1. #41
    Join Date
    Oct. 29, 2007
    Location
    TN
    Posts
    1,870

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    Lol I had forgotten my first date with current Boy. We decided on dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant (public place!), in a pretty bustling part of town. Well I get there and it's on an empty back street, and the restaurant is literally him, me, the waiter, and one other couple who left before we were done, and who apparently were also on a first internet date judging by the conversation. So now we joke "yeahhh I don't know if that counted as public..."
    "Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out." ~John Wooden

    Phoenix Animal Rescue



  2. #42
    Join Date
    Oct. 14, 2004
    Location
    Lexington, KY
    Posts
    952

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    Quote Originally Posted by rothmpp View Post
    Public, public, public, crowded location. No matter how comfortable you feel, do not compromise on that point. And I would do that for a couple of dates.

    Make your emergency contact person the first number on your phone so that if you need to make contact without being obvious it's just a couple of buttons. Don't have to dial or scroll for pages to get to the number you want in an emergency.

    The sister of a co-worker was murdered by a person she met online. On their first in-person date. And she did not abide by all of the rules that others have given you here. It may seem super paranoid, but don't be my friend's sister.
    While your story is extremely sad and scary, that could have happened with a guy she met a bar. I think the moral of the story is be careful when going out with a stranger regardless of how you met.
    ************************
    "I can't help but wonder,what would Jimmy Buffett do?"



  3. #43
    Join Date
    Oct. 14, 2004
    Location
    Lexington, KY
    Posts
    952

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    After the last a-hole exBF cheated on me and I swore off men, my mom pestered me relentlessly to go on match.com. So I finally did and made an obnoxious profile and got some really entertaining responses.

    My friend and I wanted to start a blog based on our emails and dates with guys from there that ranged from Mr. T-rex arms to Mr. I just drank 6 rum and cokes on a first date. Oh and the guy who argued with me when I said I didnt want to date someone with kids (truthfully, he was extremely unattractive and I didnt want to be mean).

    I'm with everyone else here that says meet in a public place and let someone know where you are going and what your dates name is. I always told a friend what their car looked like too. And I always sent an "I didnt get kidnapped" text at the end of the night.

    For the first date with my current BF, we met at my favorite bar where I knew the bartender and where my friends frequented. Second date was to play disc golf in the local park (which is a super fun date idea).

    I was against online dating and thought all I would meet were nuts and my parents called me one day and my dad yelled "You dont think you'll meet crazies at a bar?? YOu have just as good of chance there to!" into speakerphone. And i realized he was right!
    ************************
    "I can't help but wonder,what would Jimmy Buffett do?"



  4. #44
    elf'o'MeghanDACVA Guest

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    I am encouraged by so many success stories
    It wasn't easy, but I found a few online listings for his farrier services. That and one of his pictures of him trimming a horse leads me to believe that much about him. Thanks for all the advice! I need all the help I can get.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  5. #45
    Join Date
    Oct. 28, 2007
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    4,524

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    Farrier? Just thinking of some of some of the posts I've seen on Coth by some farriers, be prepared to bring your dictionary and be ready to defend any statements you make.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  6. #46
    elf'o'MeghanDACVA Guest

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    Haha



  7. #47
    Join Date
    Apr. 15, 2010
    Posts
    696

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    intelis.com helped me find out a guy I was going to date was married.

    If it doesn't make sense, it's probably not true. Judge Judy says this all the time, and she's right. Don't fall for it if it sounds funny.

    People are different online than they are in person. You don't get to 'know' someone by chatting with them online. Maybe on Skype where you can see them is a little better. But not emails or chats.



  8. #48
    Join Date
    Jun. 7, 2004
    Location
    Pittsburgh,Pennsylvaina
    Posts
    4,029

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    mom met her boyfriend of 5 months online and they have been spending every other weekend together.



  9. #49
    Join Date
    Mar. 9, 2005
    Location
    In my own little world
    Posts
    480

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    I met my husband online, we skyped and also had the mutual friend vetting, my best friend talked to him and his friends talked to me before we met in person. I was quite reassured that I got the if you hurt him lecture from two of his friends, I guess I figured that if he was a creep then he probably wouldn't have friends that would do that but maybe I'm just naive...
    Freedom is the ability not to care what the other person thinks...

    Got air?! Member of the Asthmatic Riders Clique


    1 members found this post helpful.

  10. #50
    Join Date
    Apr. 15, 2010
    Posts
    696

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    Hmmm... kinda interesting that a farrier, who is around women all day long, is on an online service. Would think women would be throwing themselves at a single guy who shoes horses.



  11. #51
    Join Date
    Nov. 20, 2010
    Location
    Upstate New York
    Posts
    4,342

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    Agree on the coffee thing. Again because you can have one or ten cups. But don't let your guard down necessarily right away.

    Broke my own rule this summer. Very nice guy apparently, hit it off and seemed to have much in common. Soon as I got home, the phone was ringing that he had to see me again, that night, and at his place. He wore me down, and I relented only if I could bring the dog. The grounds were manicured and immaculate (to an obsessive extent, which frankly made me a bit uneasy), so I literally brought her with me from room to room. The house ok, but when we hit the basement "rec area", it was unbelievably tacky - reminded me of the movie Foul Play with Goldie Hawn - in Dudley Moore's apartment! LOL. Good thing Doggie had to go outside, right next to my car!

    Would also suggest googling much as possible. I made one last try at Match later this past summer, sending some e-mails to others that seemed good matches, even at a distance. One possible candidate had a lot of what i like - occupation I'm very familiar with, and a love of, and involvement with, horses. Nice correspondences but he put me off - something about the kids. Googling him, found he was about to go off to Federal prison!

    But good luck to you! From others' experiences, it apparently isn't all this way. I did have one fairly long relationship from Match - but the logistics, and eventually our priorities weren't the same. But we did have some very nice times together.
    Being right half the time beats being half-right all the time. Malcolm Forbes



  12. #52
    Join Date
    Jan. 26, 2006
    Location
    Fort Worth, Texas
    Posts
    4,729

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    Quote Originally Posted by MunchingonHay View Post

    9)charge your cell phone up until the last minute so you have a full battery

    :
    10) Take his picture when you get there an email it a safe place... since we are expecting doomsday



  13. #53
    Join Date
    Jan. 26, 2006
    Location
    Fort Worth, Texas
    Posts
    4,729

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    Quote Originally Posted by LexInVA View Post
    I always go with mini-golf if possible. You can talk, it's casual, it's fun. Other people are usually around. It's a win-win.
    a golf club is a very good weapon


    1 members found this post helpful.

  14. #54
    elf'o'MeghanDACVA Guest

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    Well, we haven't met yet, with the holidays in the way, so no update to share. Maybe next weekend... . Still taking notes from all the good advice!



  15. #55
    Join Date
    Mar. 30, 2007
    Location
    Hollowed out volcano in the South Pacific.
    Posts
    11,878

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    I'm gonna make a guess here and say your name is Stephanie. You sound like a Stephanie.
    Thus do we growl that our big toes have, at this moment, been thrown up from below!



  16. #56
    elf'o'MeghanDACVA Guest

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    uh.... no



  17. #57
    Join Date
    Mar. 30, 2007
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    Hollowed out volcano in the South Pacific.
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    11,878

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    Eleanor? Am I getting warm?
    Thus do we growl that our big toes have, at this moment, been thrown up from below!



  18. #58
    Join Date
    Aug. 3, 2004
    Location
    San Francisco
    Posts
    3,825

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    I met my wife of 10 years online. Since we needed our dogs to meet, I went to her house with my dog. I let friends know where I was going.

    the next day I took my dog home before I went to work.....
    A man must love a thing very much if he not only practices it without any hope of fame or money, but even practices it without any hope of doing it well.--G. K. Chesterton



  19. #59
    Join Date
    Jul. 1, 2000
    Location
    Goochland, VA
    Posts
    1,442

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    Friend him on Facebook. You can find out a lot about a person from his Facebook profile. If he won't friend you, there's something fishy.



  20. #60
    Join Date
    Mar. 30, 2007
    Location
    Hollowed out volcano in the South Pacific.
    Posts
    11,878

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    You don't have to "friend" someone. Just looking at their Facebook profile tells you what you need to know. Most people don't have theirs locked-down and aren't hiding anything.
    Thus do we growl that our big toes have, at this moment, been thrown up from below!



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