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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb. 14, 2012
    Location
    Fern Creek, KY
    Posts
    3,010

    Default I just want to say...

    A big fat THANK YOU to all you COTHers.

    I feel as though my life is out of control.

    My marriage is on the rocks (I'm WhoaBaby0123 from the last OT day...coming clean here!). My husband still doesn't get it.

    My sister just got admitted into rehab today, and we've decided not to have Christmas this year, my DD's 1st Christmas. My father blames me for not being 'supportive' enough to her in her younger years, which has caused her to have attention seeking problems that make her self-destruct.

    Willow is becoming increasingly more stressful with her testyness, and assholeyness. I leave the barn in tears every time I go.

    DD is not sleeping. Just screaming. All. Day. Long.

    Dixie is having all her stranger danger problems.

    I HATE being stuck at home. Hate. Hate. Hate. I was recently offered a position managing a barn, heading my own lesson program, and able to bring Willow there. I had to turn it down because we're moving. I've been working towards an offer like that for over 10 years.

    DH has been working 16-18 hour days for the past month, so I'm dealing with all this crap on my own.

    COTH, and all y'all are such a bright spot for me everyday. Thank you all so much!! I know it's silly, but I honestly don't know what I'd do with out all of you!
    Quote Originally Posted by MistyBlue View Post
    I prefer them outside playing as opposed to standing in the barn aisle playing "I can crap more than you"
    New Year, New Blog... follow Willow and I here.


    16 members found this post helpful.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul. 13, 2008
    Location
    Northern CA
    Posts
    509

    Default

    Hugs and more hugs. I don't really have anything helpful to say, but I know you'll get through this!


    1 members found this post helpful.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep. 19, 2008
    Location
    Half past the point of oblivion
    Posts
    925

    Default

    Hugs from me too. Hang in there!
    Holy crap, how does Darwin keep missing you? ~Lauruffian


    1 members found this post helpful.

  4. #4

    Default

    So sorry you have so much stress going on. Only suggestion is to try to eliminate one thing for an hour, a day, a week. It may come back after that, but at least for that period, it's one less thing to deal with.
    http://www.tbhsa.com/index.html

    Originally Posted by JSwan
    I love feral children. They taste like chicken.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar. 30, 2012
    Location
    Crestview, Fl
    Posts
    464

    Default

    Hugs to you, I didn't see your last thread. But I realize the stress the military can put on life and your marriage. There is help out there, the FRG might just be the place for you. Console in the rest of us and be assured that you can make it through the tough times. My husband and I hit a rough patch when DS was about a year old and he had actually called his FSG to be moved to the dorms, we made it through and he never left our home even after the call.
    If you ever need someone to vent to, I'll be here! Please, yell, scream anything, if you need to do it with your voice, I am willing to give you my cell number! Reach out (:


    4 members found this post helpful.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul. 31, 2007
    Posts
    15,450

    Default

    So glad COTH provides a bright spot in your day!

    It's really nice to have a broad life, and parts that aren't dictated entirely by your immediate situation and the people in it.

    With respect to your two mares-- Willow and DD. Can you have a heart-to-heart with them? Seriously, in your own (adult human) words. "Really? You need to act out so strongly? What is your problem, exactly and what do I need to change to fix that? And by the way, you are making this harder than it has to be." IME, if I have that actual conversation, I get some insight out of it. It's kind of mysterious, but telling the truth even to the non-speaking types helps me get clear.

    With respect to the family who wants to now talk about sh!te you did wrong in 1974. Your answer needs to be "Meh. Yeah, I'll own my part in that, but what do you want to do from here?"
    The armchair saddler
    Politically Pro-Cat


    3 members found this post helpful.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct. 9, 2012
    Location
    Washington State
    Posts
    506

    Default

    Super, I am so sorry things are so cruddy right now. I remember when hubby and I were first married and had a baby less than a year later and moved away from my hometown. I felt like I was all alone because his job took him away so often. (He is inthe Coast Guard). I know the weather where you are is probably cold but bundle that baby up and get out of the house. The housework can wait. Find your local YMCA and see what kind of programs they offer. Join a playgroup or hire a babysitter for an hour a few days a week and go be by yourself. Give Willow some time off and just hang out. Things will get better, repeat that to yourself every day. HUGS!
    Sorry if there are typos, I'm trying to type on a tablet and my fingers are too fat.


    6 members found this post helpful.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul. 13, 2011
    Location
    East Longmeadow, MA
    Posts
    3,548

    Default

    SM, didn't see your other post. SO sorry things are rocky right now. I don't know you IRL, but I SURE the heck wish I did! You seem like a fantastic person! Hang in there, we'll all be here for you.
    What's wrong with you?? Your cheese done slid off its cracker?!?!


    2 members found this post helpful.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul. 13, 2011
    Location
    East Longmeadow, MA
    Posts
    3,548

    Default

    Oy!!! Just searched out your other post. Man o man. Sounds like it's time for some couples counseling, stat. If he doesn't "get it" he needs a neutral third party to help him "get it." Will be rooting for you.
    What's wrong with you?? Your cheese done slid off its cracker?!?!


    1 members found this post helpful.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan. 10, 2008
    Location
    Western NY
    Posts
    5,913

    Default

    I'm sorry things are so universally rotten... hoping for some positive changes for you soon!



  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jun. 25, 2004
    Location
    Carolinas
    Posts
    4,970

    Default

    Sorry you are going thru this. Take some time off of the horses, do some grooming and ground work. One less stress until your DD is older and you can get some more rest.
    As to dad's comments, well that is his problem, not yours. You are the sister, not the parent - that is his job.
    This too will pass. Take care of yourself!
    "Never do anything that you have to explain twice to the paramedics."
    Courtesy my cousin Tim


    1 members found this post helpful.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Nov. 8, 2005
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    2,236

    Default

    Your fortitude and grace under fire are impressive.

    The COTH community can be wonderful at times. I feel that I owe it a lot in so many ways.
    If I knew what I were doing, why would I take lessons?

    "Things should be as simple as possible,
    but no simpler." - Einstein



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec. 31, 2009
    Location
    Area 51
    Posts
    1,708

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fooler View Post
    As to dad's comments, well that is his problem, not yours. You are the sister, not the parent - that is his job.
    I agree with this. What a crappy thing for your dad to say actually...
    I LOVE my Chickens!


    2 members found this post helpful.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Apr. 28, 2008
    Posts
    7,455

    Default

    So sorry you are going through a rough time. BTDT with a colicky baby -- that just makes everything so much more bleak.

    Have you tried reflux meds? if you are BFing, elimination diets seem to help some people. What helped mine was Nutramigen. It turns out he is lactose-intolerant and breastmilk has lactose so I could eliminate everything in the world and still have a colicky baby.

    Hang in there. My son was a terror his first 8 months but he turned into the sweetest, easiest child around age 1 and has been ever since. I am sure yours will do the same since you are building up a huge supply of good karma.

    Ignore your dad, his comment about your sister was idiotic.


    1 members found this post helpful.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar. 27, 2008
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    1,785

    Default

    I'm sorry you are going through all this. Big Ol' Internet Hugs from me.
    You are what you dare.



  16. #16
    Join Date
    May. 15, 2005
    Location
    Australasia
    Posts
    1,187

    Default

    That's a big serving of poo sammich Super. I don't have any advice or suggestions, just lots of hugs for ya! And a wine or two if you were closer.
    where am I, what day is it, am I still having a good time?



  17. #17
    Join Date
    Dec. 2, 2009
    Posts
    3,639

    Default

    I'll just give you a *hug*

    I also had one on Nutramigen. Smells like yuck, but it's the only thing that worked for my eldest!



  18. #18
    Join Date
    Sep. 11, 2008
    Location
    Snohomish, WA
    Posts
    4,225

    Default

    ((Hugs)) from me too. Sorry you're going through this.
    Agree with others that said this isn't your deal - it's your sister not your daughter.



  19. #19
    Join Date
    Nov. 13, 2006
    Posts
    1,407

    Default

    Huge hugs and I second the reflux. My daughter had zero reflux symptoms and it took her having one of her screaming episodes at the Dr. To get him to listen to me (first Time mom who didn't believe it was just colic). Three days after going on Zantac she went from the baby from he!! To a normal infant, it's worth looking into.

    I hope things look up soon, you've got a lot on your plate


    1 members found this post helpful.

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Nov. 8, 2005
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    2,236

    Default

    Intriguing about the proton-pump inhibitors. Too bad they weren't available back in the day as the saying goes. (Hell, President Millard Fillmore was actually out of office and even happily retired before I was born...)

    I'm told I had GI sensitivities as a baby, and I do know that when my paternal grandmother chose to ignore my Mom's warnings and bounce me around after a sub-one year old feeding, I promptly threw up all over her back, apparently something that neither my father, nor my uncle, nor my older cousin ever did.
    If I knew what I were doing, why would I take lessons?

    "Things should be as simple as possible,
    but no simpler." - Einstein



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