Probably not the best way to start posting here, but this forum caught my eye.
I have not ridden in 10 months.
I have not been in a terrible horse-related crash, or any kind of horse-related crash. But I'm on meds that have left me couch bound for days and parts of days. I have a horse that needs to be in work when he's in work. He's not the type of horse you can hop on whenever you feel like it and canter around the field on a long rein, unless you like landing in the dirt. He's actually a wonderful horse, but he needs someone who can take charge and be alert and confident. He doesn't need physical strength to be ridden but incentive, which I don't have. He's been hanging out in the field with his buddies during this time and is happy as a clam.
I'm on a couple of medications. They help but they also cause a lot of problems. One causes fatigue, and another hypersensitivity. Without the second I don't even have the energy to get out of bed or off the couch. Tried going off meds gradually last year and had 2 good months before a bad (emotional) crash. Am going to a new doctor this week to try new options.
These meds have given me an idea of what fibromyalgia is like, and those who suffer from it and any chronic pain have my deepest sympathies.
I just wanted to vent and see if anyone was in the same or similar boat.
I was mildly fatigued for quite a while, but didn't really give it much attention because of the meds I am on for bipolar d/o and ADD. Turns out I had high blood calcium and an overactive parathyroid gland. Had surgery 3 weeks ago and feel terrific now. I didn't realize how tired I was. This was picked up during a routine physical. But now I'm thinking I won't be feeling so terrific because I haven't received the bills yet!
I am tired. I have no energy. Hobbies that used to be enoyed are now obligations/chores.
I hope some of it is Winter Blahs. I continue to make myself participate in some hobbies I can physically handle as it too easy for me to be satisfied housebound & hermit-ty. I have even signed up to participate in a very low-impact way in the COTH Spring Hunt, thanks to encouragement from whicker; though just thinking about it makes me tired .
Friday night my sis dragged me to a bar. We left when I said so after a couple hours. Yay me for pacing/setting boundaries so I won't be extra crippled the next day . Back home I announce after looking at the clock: 'Hey I survived 2 hrs!!' She was angered/offended. Oops miscommunication: doing anything for 2hrs is a major accomplishment! Standing around a bar shouldn't take much energy, right? We know different.
It is hard to describe or receive understanding from others. But posters in this forum have similar issues and do understand. Welcome!
I had the hardest time through college, half attempting to get people to understand that just standing hurts, and that I was too tired. So then I would just drink myself out of it (please note sarcasm) so it was just great.
Even my husband who is very supportive & understanding doesn't get that i don't want to go out, I want him to take the kids out & let me sit in a hot bath by myself & then go to bed...
It is amazing how crippling constant fatigue can be, and really difficult to try to get others to try to understand...among any other issues/pains that we all may have...
I am exhausted all the time. I have MS but this is the first time that I truly have to force myself to get out of bed due to being just plain tired.
I feel worn out and drained for no reason. I almost dread morning knowing I have to feed/water and turn out 7 horses. Takes me longer and I come back in wanting to drop onto the sofa and not move again.
Maybe when the sun starts to shine on a regular basis and the temps warm up, so will my energy level improve. I sure hope so, 'cos this sucks.
I totally understand. Every time my meds are increased (and half the time when theyre not increased, and I just take them as prescribed) they make me exhausted. I have no energy to get out of bed/off the couch. Ive gained weight because of it, which I believe makes me have LESS energy.
I've been trying to get my butt out riding at least on weekends, and have personal training tonight. Speaking of which, I believe its about time to chug coffee and water and eat some carbs to give me the energy so I dont pass out at the gym...UGH.
I hope your med levels "even out" and the side effects lessen. Its awful, but hopefully the new doctor can help you a bit! Good luck
It's definitely That Stage of the winter-spring transition when everything feels just a little bit harder if you live somewhere with winter, because you're thinking ENOUGH already.
Add that a lot of conditions with an inflammatory component get grumpier with weather changes, and it does start feeling like it's time to hibernate for a week, even before you add in medication side effects, actual fatigue, etc.
Plus, for me, allergies are starting up (we have snow outside, wth is the pollen coming from?) which makes my arthritis Extra Cranky, so, yup. Just plain tired.
(Which then makes it harder than heck for me to judge if it's a 'stay home and rest' tired or a 'just do it anyway' tired where I'll feel better once I get going. I hate that.)
Fatigue is the name of the game. On the days where I'm building up to a seizure, I will just be WIPED. Makes it hard to get through class consciously (and I am usually having petit mal seizures as well while it's building up). Then it comes and I'm in Faraway Land for a while, and either I'll wake up and be totally fine and alert or just sleep for hours.
That happened the other day. I got out of bed after a good several hour's sleep, and I was just dog tired for no apparent reason. While I was going through my morning routine I had a seizure (which is really odd - very rare that I get them in the morning), recovered for a few minutes, got up and had a super productive day. Go figure.
And as for meds....eu veh. They can really screw things up. The couple SSRIs I've tried really messed with my perception of reality - it was like everything was a movie and I was just one step out of it (anyone read Harry Potter? The Pensieve was exactly what it felt like). And the first anticonvulsant I tried (Keppra, which works wonders for a lot of people) drove me absolutey UP THE WALL. Within 24 hours on the drug I was seizing worse, with new types, and more frequently that without any drugs, I was rashy and itchy, moody and temperamental and mad as HELL. After a week of it I called the neuro and she told me to stop it immediately and within 24 hours off the drug it was like a new day had dawned - life was so much better off it! I'm on Lamictal now, and it does a pretty good job of controlling the seizures and it has a low side effect profile for me, but it definitely makes me a little more tired and wear-out-able than normal.
So yes, I know exactly how you feel. Tired. Tired of being tired. Tired of things I used to enjoy becoming a chore. Like everyone else has said, I hope spring brings some relief. It's sunny today, which is a welcome relief from the PNW raaaiiinn. Hope it will last a few days.
Hang in there, a lot of good people here know exactly how you feel.
"The FEI is often in error, but never in doubt." - Jim Wofford
"You do not find the happy life. You make it." - Camilla Eyring Kimball
And as for meds....eu veh. They can really screw things up. The couple SSRIs I've tried really messed with my perception of reality - it was like everything was a movie and I was just one step out of it (anyone read Harry Potter? The Pensieve was exactly what it felt like).
I had that exact problem with Prozac - sure, I wasn't depressed, but I wasn't much of anything. Like, something would happen and intellectually I'd go 'you know, I should be happy/upset/worried' but emotionally it'd just be very ... blah.
It was a rather weird experience. (I was lucky in that a different SSRI did work for me, though - at the time I was under a huge amount of stress and very depressed, and I really need something to help.)
I'm tired of being tired, that is what I told my doctor and demanded a sleep study. Sure enough I have sleep apnea. I used to be too tired for anything and I planned my day around when I could sleep. It was horrible, if I sat down I fell asleep and when I woke I had no energy. Now I have a CPAP mask and am doing much better.
Worked in the yard yesterday afternoon and am struggling a bit to finish what I started yesterday. Then to grocery store and feed horses. What would normally be a slight strain in my upper back is pain that reverberates from my back down my arms and ribs and even to my legs.
I really really do not want to take MAOIs. Feel free to slap me upside the head. If I was in an unmedicated state of feeling constant overwhelming terror, pain and guilt I wouldn't hesitate. It's just that dang, I really like Chinese food and cheese. It sounds idiotic, I know: pain and fatigue vs certain foods, although I don't know how I will react to a MAOI, either. It's only a big deal because I don't eat much meat and cheese is a good source of protein.
Tell your Dr. how you feel. He may have other meds he can change you over to.
I am constantly tired. I wake up tired and go to bed tired.
I am not on anything that should make me tired out. It has been with me since I was a teenager.
I think if I didn't have to work for a living I would just go to bed and stay there. I would sleep for a week solid, but it will not take away the constantly tired feeling.
You are not alone. There are many of us in the same boat.
I would love to wake up and feel good and fresh and happy in the morning. I tried drinking coffee by the gallon and my stomach said to stop that. My body does not like the caffiene. But it did help for a while.
Hope your Dr. can help.
I am SO relieved to know that I'm not the only one struggling with this long, cold, miserable winter. Yesterday, I spent three hours out in the unheated barn at about 10 degrees F., while the farrier worked on my horses. Choir practice last evening ran late. Today I'm bushed, slept 2 hours after feeding the horses. My fingers are swollen like sausages. I should go out for a walk with the dogs, but slogging through deep snow has no appeal to me today.
Let us hope for spring to come sooner rather than later.
I struggle every winter. March is my WORST month. It isn't even fatique. It's just total lack of interest and motivation. I load up on vitamin D and still go to the gym, and the barn and keep up on my meds and my active routine but sometimes it is a real struggle. I plan interesting things to do and then practically have to force myself to do them.
All the fun stuff I've planned, that during the summer months I would look forward to, starts to pile up on me like a huge burden and triggers anxiety and worry because I'd really rather just lay in bed and stare at the ceiling. I've gotten used to my seasonal mood ebb and flow. I can manage it but it isn't easy by any means. I just have to keep smiling and putting one foot in front of the other until the cobwebs clear and everything starts to look brighter again.
Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and you made a bad decision.
My fingers are swollen like sausages. I should go out for a walk with the dogs, but slogging through deep snow has no appeal to me today.
For hand pain/swelling one thing that I find helps some is a really heavy hand cream (seriously, something greasy) and cotton gloves (can be purchased at most pharmacies fairly inexpensively - I think it's around $2 a pair here, and I have a few pairs and just wash them with my socks.)
Before bed, apply hand cream liberally. Massage. REALLY take your time massaging your hands. (Bonus if you can get someone else to do it.) I normally start by massaging towards my fingers, and end by massaging away and up my arm, but I have no proof for that being an effective method over something else. Just massage all the areas where your hands are or will be getting stiff. (I tend to massage fairly firmly, also, but it depends on what feels best for you.)
Then apply the cotton gloves (because your hands will be greasy, plus it helps keep your hands warmer which seems to help mine) and go to bed.
It doesn't make them completely perfect in the morning, but it does help reduce the amount of stiffness and swelling. (On really bad days I do it in the morning, too, to try to get the fluid build up to disperse.)
I also have a child's sized hot water bottle that I bought, and I made a cover for it that has pockets - sort of like a muff - and sometimes I'll use that also, to stimulate circulation.
I have been talking to my doctor, the assembly line see you once a month for a $90 15 minute appt, whether I need it or not. <sarcasm> I've been seeing him for 8 months. I just don't think he took the problems I'm having with the meds seriously enough. The best I've been in the last 4 years (with meds) is half steam, which beats panic and depression but doesn't really seem acceptable to me. Some of the meds have knocked me down to 0-25%. With those meds, reading and typing on the computer for 15 minutes would make me so tired I'd have to just put the computer down and lay down and close my eyes. If I'd have a job outside of the farm I'd probably have lost it by now, unless it was the kind of job where I could lie flat on my back, preferably with my eyes closed and not doing anything. My husband has had to take over A LOT of work, in addition to his very demanding job. I don't know how he did it. (Currently at 50% again, so I'm able to pull some of my weight now.) I'm seeing someone new tomorrow (better late than never, right?), hopefully someone who can help with managing the meds better. Not seasonally affected; rather wish it was, as I've heard full-spectrum light helps with that.
I'm always glad not to live up north because of the winters, but this year I know the Northeast really got smacked. Seems like that would make horsekeeping a LOT harder than it is in a more moderate climate, where we mostly just deal with mud.
kdow, I gave your massage suggestion a try (without the gloves, and only light hand creme) and my hands were much better the next day. Thanks!
Glad to know it worked for someone else.
I think it's not so much the weight of the hand cream as how quickly it soaks in - you need something that stays on the skin enough to actually get some slip from it for massaging. So while I use heavy stuff because I get horribly dry skin on my hands in the winters also, something lighter would be fine as long as it's not one of those ones that soaks in as soon as you put it on. Does that make sense?