Especially to those who post here about their trials and tribulations! I'm an adult re-rider whose main problem is anxiety - not anxiety about getting hurt, but anxiety about not riding perfectly! Hearing about other people's issues really helps, so thanks to all of you!! And, no, it's not a misery-loves-company sort of thing, but a "see? Everyone has riding struggles! IT'S NOT JUST YOU! Get over it and keep striving!!!" And, yeah, I know riding _perfectly_ is really not possible for anyone, but I seem to be surrounded by exceptional riders (who are all like 20 years younger, of course!!) so it can get a bit overwhelming!!
I've posted before about my anxiety, but I just wanted to say a quick thank you to all of you!
(and if any of you ARE "perfect" riders, thanks for that too - something to aspire to!)
I, too, am an adult re-rider and have been going through the same thing. It's frustrating to not be "snapping back" to where I was as quickly as I had hoped (not that I was ever a *perfect* rider, but I was a CONFIDENT rider). But I'm trying to give myself a break and not put so much pressure on myself. It took a long time to get to where I was before, and although I haven't been away all that long, it'll take a while to get back there. I just have to learn to be ok with that.
I find that a ducks opinion of me is very much influenced over whether or not I have bread. Ducks love bread but they do not have the capability to buy a loaf. Thats the biggest joke on the duck ever.
And to learn that it's ok to be ok w/ that! My trainer is always telling me to relax -obviously it's going to take me, the 2x a week rider, longer to get somewhere than someone riding 5 horses a day. And that's ok - I'm not shooting for the Olympics!
Heck, I'm not even a re-rider and I have noticed that as I get older, so goes my courage. I am not scared to jump, I am scared that I won't do it perfectly.
I am also riding a different horse now. The first horse I have ridden consistently, other than my own horse, in 13 years. So that makes a difference too.
And then there is the schooling show this weekend that I have ALREADY lost sleep over, but I have found that taking beta blockers helps with the performance anxiety... if I can just get into the arena.
Last edited by drmgncolor; Nov. 28, 2012 at 01:40 PM.
My realization that at 43 as a re-rider I'm not what I was as a horse-crazy 15 year-old is that now I fall! PFFFT.
Oh yes, I know all about that! haha.
I have to keep reminding myself to enjoy the journey and not worry so much about the destination....and we have been gradually improving, though not always as quickly as I would like, so I refer back to my original point
Should we form a group? Actually, we have one - the Adult Re-Rider group on COTH. But, I will tell you, my anxieties are numerous and occupy many parts of my brain. Riding in the open: I like my our arena at the barn - it has fences, there is a limited amount of space for bad things to happen. Riding in the jump field - there is no fence, you can ride all over the farm, to the barn, down the drive way, into the woods - you get my drift. Shows: Breathing is good - why can't I do it consistently. Relax my trainer says: which part? my back? my neck? my shoulders? LOL - at our our last show, if my trainer could have figured out a way to get my show clothes there without telling me, I probably would not have found out I was riding until the day of.
In truth, thanks to my trainer, I am learning to ride in the NOW and not think ahead or what bad things can happen. Actually rode both days last weekend in the jump field, my horse loved it, had his big boy gaits on and I just rode. At that last show, I tried to adopt a don't give a darn attitude and just ride my horse. It sort of worked.......
At 57 I keep looking for that 12 year old fearless girl. Sometimes I see her, just catch a glimpse.