The Chronicle of the Horse
MagazineNewsHorse SportsHorse CareCOTH StoreVoicesThe Chronicle UntackedDirectoriesMarketplaceDates & Results
 
Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 87
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun. 20, 2009
    Location
    Hunterdon County NJ
    Posts
    3,006

    Cool Single, ChildFree and Loving it!!

    Ok, I've done some ignorant things in my life, but staying single and 'kidless' was just pure genius!!

    Unless a horse gets sick my life is basically my own 24/7.

    Kids cost a bloody fortune, and they're so, permanent...

    Getting divorced is expensive. (I've know people who were marred 5 times!!)

    And an SO expects to be a 'part' of one's life. Even when one is just not in the mood to be a part of anything.

    And how many people do we have on the planet right now? I should get a tax credit for not adding to the country's carbon footprint by popping out more consumers of fossil fuels.

    I know there are plenty of other folks out there who are 'flying solo' and laughing all the way to their beloved remote control without fear of having to fight over it!


    29 members found this post helpful.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul. 19, 2003
    Location
    Middleburg, VA
    Posts
    13,016

    Default

    Me.

    I have zero intention of EVER passing on my genes.

    I am very indifferent to dating and relationships. Of course, there are certain "things" that come along with a relationship that I miss, but there are ways around that. My stance on dating, etc, is that if it happens, it happens. If not, meh.


    2 members found this post helpful.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2007
    Location
    Down on the Farm
    Posts
    3,055

    Default

    Good thing for you that your parents thought otherwise!


    4 members found this post helpful.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan. 28, 2003
    Location
    Hollywood, but not the one where they have the Oscars!
    Posts
    7,243

    Default

    I am an only child, and single and childless. I wouldnt have it any other way.
    "You can't really debate with someone who has a prescient invisible friend"
    carolprudm


    5 members found this post helpful.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar. 12, 2006
    Posts
    2,123

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Isabeau Z Solace View Post
    Ok, I've done some ignorant things in my life, but staying single and 'kidless' was just pure genius!!
    I wish I had stayed single, I'm divorced and still feel weird when I speak of my "ex". Never wanted to do the kid thing. That's best left for people with patience.
    "All top hat and no canter". *Graureiter*


    2 members found this post helpful.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb. 14, 2008
    Posts
    925

    Default

    I gave up on the whole dating thing a while ago. I do miss some of the things that go along with having a SO/husband but my days are mine to do with what I want. There are no expectations therefore no disappointments.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul. 19, 2003
    Location
    Middleburg, VA
    Posts
    13,016

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Acertainsmile View Post
    Good thing for you that your parents thought otherwise!
    Honestly, I don't understand comments like that. My parents chose to have kids. I choose not to (as have both my siblings). Our mom is ok with that.

    Seriously, what is the point of a comment like that?


    30 members found this post helpful.

  8. #8
    SweetMutt's Elf Guest

    Default

    My parent supported my choice to remain kidless and agreed it was the right one for me.

    Single I am thus far. Not averse to the possibility, but he will have to fall straight into my path, because I'm happy as am, and I'm not wasting time looking. And he will have to pass certain compatibility standards if he does thus fall.


    3 members found this post helpful.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2007
    Location
    Down on the Farm
    Posts
    3,055

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by yellowbritches View Post
    Honestly, I don't understand comments like that. My parents chose to have kids. I choose not to (as have both my siblings). Our mom is ok with that.

    Seriously, what is the point of a comment like that?
    Good grief, just pointing something out, but it's true right?


    5 members found this post helpful.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul. 19, 2003
    Location
    Middleburg, VA
    Posts
    13,016

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Acertainsmile View Post
    Good grief, just pointing something out, but it's true right?
    Depends on who you ask!


    3 members found this post helpful.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jul. 22, 2012
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    816

    Default

    Currently single, and forever childfree by choice. I'm certainly open to a long term relationship, but I'm not actively looking. And as far as I'm concerned, my dogs, cats, and horses are my kids. And they are far less irritating than real kids.


    5 members found this post helpful.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Dec. 15, 2003
    Posts
    1,376

    Default

    I'm happier in the moment when I'm single but for some reason decided that long-term it would be better to have a partner. Still not sure it was the right choice, although I do truly care for my SO life was so much less complicated when we were friends and I was free!


    3 members found this post helpful.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Jul. 31, 2007
    Posts
    15,345

    Default

    It's great.... until I'm way old and look down the barrel of paying market rate for elder care.
    The armchair saddler
    Politically Pro-Cat


    2 members found this post helpful.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2007
    Location
    Down on the Farm
    Posts
    3,055

    Default

    To the OP, your post is a wee bit concending to those of us who are happily married, and love our children. It's would be kind of like me starting a post off by saying, look at me, I have a wonderful husband (who came with a big farm) and now we have beautiful children, my life is sooo perfect.

    See, I feel the opposite, I'm grateful to have found a wonderful partner and someone who deeply loves me. While I know this isn't the norm for a lot of people, there are some good ones to be found.

    Your post reminds me of what my sister used to say, untill she found "the one", she wouldnt trade her life now for all those lonely single nights.

    While I'm aware of personal choices, I just find it odd the way you go about announcing them, I'm not sure if it's the Holidays, but to me it sounds as if you're trying to convince youself that you're okay.

    P.S. If you have more than one T.V. there is no fighting over the remote.


    14 members found this post helpful.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jan. 31, 2003
    Posts
    18,472

    Default

    I would be happy either way.

    Marriage/kids, great!

    Single/no kids, great!

    Happiness is not dependent on your marital status or your status as a parent. I remember being lonely once.. Then I opened a book and read it. I LOVE being alone. Trade LMEqT for anything? Heck, no.
    "Kindness is free" ~ Eurofoal
    ---
    The CoTH CYA - please consult w/your veterinarian under any and all circumstances.


    11 members found this post helpful.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Mar. 24, 2012
    Posts
    1,755

    Default

    There is some relief in knowing one got through certain relationships without dragging children through those messes or at least that is how I see it.

    I would have liked to have had children but only with the right partner who was committed to the same thing.


    6 members found this post helpful.

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Jun. 20, 2009
    Location
    Hunterdon County NJ
    Posts
    3,006

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Acertainsmile View Post
    P.S. If you have more than one T.V. there is no fighting over the remote.
    And what exactly is the freakin' point of having a spouse and kids if they all hide in their rooms on their own TV/computer. Or sitting at the kitchen table on the iphones, ignoring the people who are actually, physically, in the room? Cuz that's what it's come to, in reality.

    That's why the Amish espouse anything that takes away from the family bond. Anything that's going to damage family ties, they ain't interested in. And that's pretty smart, really.

    But, I still reserve the right to gloat about all my free time, uninterrupted sleep, etc.

    Sure, some folks have happy marriages and healthy, hard working kids. But how many wind up with that good deal? Personally, I know more divorces, problematic kids (the most terrifying being the permanently disabled kids) etc than I know happy ending scenarios.

    And really, with our issues of global warming, limited water and energy resources, etc we REALLY should be encouraging people who choose NOT to have kids. How many self centered, greedy homo sapiens do you think we can squeeze onto this rock, anyway?

    Should we, instead, keep breeding like rabbits until our civilization collapses catastrophically?

    Nah.


    17 members found this post helpful.

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Aug. 27, 2008
    Posts
    392

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Acertainsmile View Post
    To the OP, your post is a wee bit concending to those of us who are happily married, and love our children. It's would be kind of like me starting a post off by saying, look at me, I have a wonderful husband (who came with a big farm) and now we have beautiful children, my life is sooo perfect.

    See, I feel the opposite, I'm grateful to have found a wonderful partner and someone who deeply loves me. While I know this isn't the norm for a lot of people, there are some good ones to be found.

    Your post reminds me of what my sister used to say, untill she found "the one", she wouldnt trade her life now for all those lonely single nights.

    While I'm aware of personal choices, I just find it odd the way you go about announcing them, I'm not sure if it's the Holidays, but to me it sounds as if you're trying to convince youself that you're okay.

    P.S. If you have more than one T.V. there is no fighting over the remote.
    I can understand the view that this is condescending but I think it's really that the single and childless are often looked upon as being lonely or there is something wrong with those choices. I think OP was just stating that she doesn't fall into the societal norm but she's happy anyway. That's how I took it anyway. And I think it's more condescending that you refer to single nights as lonely. I'm single but I'm sure as heck not lonely. I'm not any happier in relationships when they are good then when I'm single. I think that's what OP means. I do have a lot of friends this year getting divorced and I feel so terrible for them so I am very glad to hear you do have someone that truly loves you.


    14 members found this post helpful.

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Mar. 1, 2003
    Location
    Happily in Canada
    Posts
    4,882

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mvp View Post
    It's great.... until I'm way old and look down the barrel of paying market rate for elder care.
    Having a spouse and/or kids is NO guarantee this won't happen to you anyway. (I see it every day at my job...)
    Blugal

    You never know what kind of obsessive compulsive crazy person you are until another person imitates your behaviour at a three-day. --Gry2Yng


    11 members found this post helpful.

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Nov. 1, 2007
    Location
    ....in a classroom in Fl, by the ocean
    Posts
    3,777

    Default

    WOOP WOOP!!

    Add me to the single, childless and LOVING IT ! Group.

    I have made the decisions to not have children and I am happy in my station in life.

    I am glad that there are people out there that have kids. I personally choose not to because of genetic reasons.

    Every other Off Topic day a thread similar to this will pop up and people chime in why they choose to be childless, how they never felt gooey about babies etc.

    Its great that we all have the ability to choose....don't you agree?


    12 members found this post helpful.

Similar Threads

  1. Loving Le Rouge!
    By stolensilver in forum Sport Horse Breeding
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: Oct. 8, 2012, 04:05 PM
  2. I am loving dressage now more than ever...
    By PaulaM in forum Dressage
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: Aug. 18, 2012, 02:01 PM
  3. Now This Little Baby is Getting Some Serious Loving!
    By Mike Matson in forum Off Course
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: Feb. 21, 2012, 08:04 AM
  4. NC: Loving Senior Shephard Mix Seeks Loving Home
    By graceridgefarms in forum Giveaways
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: May. 28, 2009, 01:24 PM
  5. Loving dog needs loving home!
    By JKBD in forum Giveaways
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: Oct. 23, 2008, 12:10 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
randomness