well today was really hard. and I say that only matter of fact(ly) in retrospect...while in it, there was more of a feeling that I was not in the right place or that time moved differently for me than it did the others around the table or in the house at the same time....as if some drug had slowed down my perceptions of where I was.It was nice to be with friends and family of course,but this film kept me from being with them completely.As if another world waited and beckoned just.right.there. but I could not touch it.
((HUGS)) to you, and Bacardi, the way you worded this is absolutely perfect! My dad died in June 2006, which was sadder than sad, but after mom passed April 2004, this is EXACTLY how I felt and could never really put it into words. Now, with the hubs having cancer and worrying about his outcome, every day I just feel like I'm existing on a parallel road from everyone else.........
My dear mother passed away last night. Yes, just last night. I'm still numb, even though it was fully expected. Going thru the motions & trying to appear normal. In fact, our friggin 20-pound turkey just went into the oven 90 minutes ago. We'll probably be eating at midnight. But who cares.
It's just my husband & me, but I still can't imagine Thanksgiving being the same again. It was bad enough when a much-loved cousin was shot in the head & killed by his own nephew in a deer-hunting accident the day before Thanksgiving back in 1995. That in itself made Thanksgiving a sad holiday for us. Now this.
The Thanksgiving cocktails made an earlier-than-usual appearance today. I'm surprised my posts don't read "Zfrtsaa exnlko gjhoioso hajdje".
Oh, I just read this. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. You must be devastated.
There are no wise words from me, but I know when my mother died, I appreciated hearing comments about her, as opposed to hearing nothing, as if she never existed. I still feel the same way about talking about her, about things she said or thought, about recipes she made, funny stuff, annoying things, whatever.
A very very close friend of our family was brought home last night and not thought to make it through the night. I haven't heard yet today if he passed or not... it's my dad's best friend, the most kind intelligent person I know. Very difficult.
My first alone. and recovering from surgery a week ago. Recently out of a long term relationship I thought would last forever. Nice to know I am not all that alone.
Ah kimball, right there with you. I'm not alone, but just me and my parents, not quite how I would have pictured it a year ago. But ditto on the surgery (no riding, and awful, gloomy weather) and the recent end of a very long relationship I didn't imagine would end.
The good news is, things must be looking up from here, this crap month will be over soon!
P.S. Thanks Alagirl, it is nice to have a place to remind you that you aren't really alone.