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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr. 12, 2002
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    Texas
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    4,341

    Default Have you ever? (please add your own)

    Have you ever woken up in the morning, headed to the restroom for the requisite early morning tinkle, and sat down to quickly feel 2 furry paws on your arse?

    Have you ever, after yelling for said furry paws to be removed from your arse (I don't need help Harley!!), found a kitteh head inserted between your underwear and, well, you, looking up at you all innocently?

    Have you ever, after removing said kitteh from you underwear, had a JRT jump into your lap, while you are still trying to get that tinkle taken care of?

    Was not a good morning at the RTR household.
    Rhode Islands are red;
    North Hollands are blue.
    Sorry my thoroughbreds
    Stomped on your roo. Originally Posted by pAin't_Misbehavin' :



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan. 4, 2007
    Location
    TX
    Posts
    47,037

    Default

    My story, I trained my cat to use the human toilet, all but flushing, thank goodness.
    We didn't need the toilet flushed a million times a day.

    So, said cat decided it was the neatest game to wait until the first human woke up and hurried to use the toilet, then race you to it and jump up and use it first.
    You had to wait there, legs crossed, telling said cat to hurry, please.
    We learned to not wait to the last minute.

    http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a2...o/Missy2-1.jpg



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb. 1, 2008
    Location
    Nowhere, Maryland
    Posts
    4,323

    Default

    Leaned over to hit the snooze button on your alarm clock, then when you went to lie back, realized the cat had taken advantage of your moving for a tenth of second to move into your spot on the bed. Bonus points if you panic at the feeling of something warm and furry suddenly being under your back and fall off the edge of the bed.



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug. 2, 2000
    Location
    Chesterland, OH USA
    Posts
    2,814

    Default

    My Socks kitty has learned to run and launch herself at you while you are sitting on the toilet. She figures you are a captive audience. If you try to block her from jumping up, she will try to hold on with her claws so it is best just to let her hop up and pet her.



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct. 22, 2009
    Posts
    2,998

    Default

    Have you ever scrunched yourself into a teeny-tiny ball on one corner of your queen sized bed,because your cat has strategically curled up just so that you can't move without disturbing them?
    .



  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug. 18, 2011
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    298

    Default

    Have you ever stumbled down the stairs to use the toilet, tripped over a cat, fell down the last few stairs and brutally sprained your ankle? Bonus points if said cat tries to make up for it by licking your hair while you belly-crawl to the bathroom because you really, really need to pee!
    Horsey romances written by a horsey person
    www.JesseHayworth.com



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec. 20, 2011
    Posts
    1,192

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Big_Grey_hunter View Post
    Have you ever scrunched yourself into a teeny-tiny ball on one corner of your queen sized bed,because your cat has strategically curled up just so that you can't move without disturbing them?
    Similar: have you ever woken up in the middle of the night with the need to fulfill nature's call only to realize you're trapped beneath the blanket with arms wedged to your side by 10 lbs of cat along both your sides?

    Or...

    Have you ever had to catch a cat in mid leap so he wouldn't take a very sudden toilet bowl bath since he just came careening around the corner and didn't see you lift the lid?

    (last one, promise)

    Have you ever been woken up at ungodly hour thirty by a cat using your left boob as a landing pad for a leap up into bed?



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug. 15, 2008
    Posts
    4,668

    Default

    Have you ever greatly upset your JRT (who loves to sleep burrowed under the covers with you) by farting? JRT comes crawling out, looks you in the face, walks to the end of the bed, sighs and flops down on top of the covers, angry that their owner would give them a dutch oven.
    "Aye God, Woodrow..."



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar. 10, 2009
    Posts
    5,736

    Default

    Have you ever purchased a king-sized bed, even though it's really too big for the room, in the hopes that there would finally be room enough for 2 humans and 2 medium-sized dogs? (There's not. Canines quickly figured out how to maximize all of the new extra space for themselves).

    Have you ever flung treats at your dogs so you could win the race to the bed and get comfortable before the dogs got up there?

    And have you ever not wanted to get up in the morning because both dogs are being extra-snuggly and cuddly and it's just too perfect to want to move?
    Last edited by Mara; Oct. 2, 2012 at 02:24 PM.



  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec. 20, 2011
    Posts
    1,192

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Spot View Post
    Have you ever greatly upset your JRT (who loves to sleep burrowed under the covers with you) by farting? JRT comes crawling out, looks you in the face, walks to the end of the bed, sighs and flops down on top of the covers, angry that their owner would give them a dutch oven.
    You big meanie!

    With the cat yes -- it's even more amusing if after coming out under the blanket she gives me the flehmen response before slinking off.



  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jan. 12, 2007
    Posts
    34

    Default

    Have you ever been woken up in the middle of of a cool night having your blankets unceremoniously wrenched off of you because you tried to teach your dog to get under the covers by herself but all she figured out was to put her head under and then just bulldoze to the foot of the bed so then you have to wake up anyway to put the covers back on yourself AND the dog. Repeat one hour later after dog gets too warm, leaves the covers, and then gets chilly and wants back under them.



  12. #12
    Join Date
    Apr. 6, 2006
    Location
    Northern Virginia
    Posts
    2,585

    Default

    Have you ever had a dream where you are being kissed by Adam Levine (or whoever floats your boat) and then woken up to realize that it's actually your cat licking your face?

    Not that..um.....it has happened to me....
    I'm just posing a hypothetical situation!

    My cat is a total jerk!!!
    Last edited by PaintPony; Oct. 2, 2012 at 03:27 PM.



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Mar. 8, 2004
    Location
    Baltimore, MD
    Posts
    21,439

    Default

    I have never sat on my cat in the bathroom but my animals all see my going into the bathroom as a invitation to get petted. I guess they think I am just sitting there and I might as well do something with my hands! The cats literally run when they see me head that direction. The dogs hope their presence alone is enough to get me to pet them but if that is not successful they run through their litany of tricks to earn their pets. Both dogs sit. Uh nothing, ok lie down. Still nothing, stand up, sit, lie down quickly. They end up looking like yo-yos if I don't give in soon enough.



  14. #14
    Join Date
    Nov. 1, 2007
    Location
    Tampa Fl.
    Posts
    4,223

    Default

    Yes, to most of the above.

    And most defiantly the, "getting pinned down by 2 10lb cats" except mine is 15lbs and the other is a 65lb dog.


    Why is it that once they are in bed they increase by 100 lbs. ??



  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar. 3, 2007
    Location
    North-Central IL
    Posts
    6,330

    Default

    Have you ever stayed at *someone else's house* and had their cat maul you at 2am when you're trying to tinkle? Especially when you don't have housecats any more at your own home, so are totally unprepared for the 12 pound ball of purr launching for your lap as soon as your skivvies are down... Ahhh, memories!
    Quote Originally Posted by enjoytheride View Post
    That's got to be expensive, how much oil can you press out of a chipmunk?



  16. #16
    Join Date
    Sep. 18, 2003
    Posts
    4,736

    Default

    Has your husband ever rolled over to give you a goodnight or good morning kiss and gotten a mouth full of fur and an indignant look from the cat who thinks her beloved person's chest is her rightful place to sleep and what the hell is that big lug doing in our bed anyway?
    __________________________
    "... if you think i'm MAD, today, of all days,
    the best day in ten years,
    you are SORELY MISTAKEN, MY LITTLE ANCHOVY."



  17. #17
    Join Date
    Apr. 12, 2002
    Location
    Texas
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    Default

    Just to be clear, I did not sit on the cat. He was waiting in ambush behind the toilet bowl and grabbed me when I sat.

    Oh yes, the putout JRT. I tend to have rather fitful sleeping spells and when I move too much, I get the JRT crawling out from the covers, giving me THE LOOK, stomping into a new spot, then the big sigh and flop down. I don't know how he puts up with me.

    I have on one occassion woke up to see JRT butthole not far enough away from my face. This is why he is no longer allowed to sleep on top of the pillow. Actually, I removed that pillow altogether so that it is no longer an option.
    Rhode Islands are red;
    North Hollands are blue.
    Sorry my thoroughbreds
    Stomped on your roo. Originally Posted by pAin't_Misbehavin' :



  18. #18
    Join Date
    Aug. 22, 2000
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    2,699

    Default

    Have you ever been awake early in the morning and tried to lie very still so the dogs dont know you are awake and demand that you get up?

    Have you ever decided to wait on that morning tinkle since the dogs will, again, decide that it is time to get up. BTW, "time to get up" means they go out, get fed, get petted, then hope to sleep in my lap!

    My boy dog has become my "Peepee Pal". Every time I am relieving myself he comes in and demands to be petted, If I let him he will put his paws on my legs and press his head against the side of mine. Good thing I live alone...



  19. #19
    Join Date
    Nov. 4, 2003
    Location
    Dallas, Georgia
    Posts
    17,126

    Default

    Have you ever sat there and had to acquiesce to the kitteh's insistant pawing of/at the drain stopper in the sink which is, afterall, YOUR cue to pleez to turn on da fawset at da slow drip so she can drink da fresh water?

    Yup, I thought so
    <>< Sorrow Looks Back. Worry Looks Around. Faith Looks Up! -- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.



  20. #20
    Join Date
    May. 28, 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    3,883

    Default

    Similar to others, but have you ever gone to pee, and have your kitten race you to the bathroom, always on the same side (left) so when you turn the corner, you ALWAYS trip over her? Every single morning. She never remembers to turn the corner with you

    Yell at the cat (quietly, so as not to wake the hubs) make it to the toilet, and sit down. Right as Katie the Kitty leaps on your lap. Sigh. Throw her down. Ward her off with your feet. Next thing you know, she has jumped up on the toilet seat behind you, and is squatting down with her head in the toilet watching you pee. Weirdest cat, I swear...

    Or how about when "the boys" are outside doing man things (DH and his dog) and DH has to go. His dog will run up, midstream, and try to cover up daddy's scent. Standing there, peeing together. Male bonding I guess? Occasionally, the poor dog gets peed on.



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