The Chronicle of the Horse
MagazineNewsHorse SportsHorse CareCOTH StoreVoicesThe Chronicle UntackedDirectoriesMarketplaceDates & Results
 
Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 104
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun. 15, 2010
    Posts
    2,558

    Default "Not having children is selfish"

    Yes. No. Maybe?


    If you opt to not have children are you being selfish about your resources or responsible for not bringing another life into the world?



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan. 6, 2003
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    3,704

    Default

    O sure. Bring a kid into the world one is not prepared to raise to be a contributing member of society. Forget the dysfunction the prospective parent was raised with, financial limitations, mental illness, genetic predispositions toward ill health. Just keep cranking out that offspring because a childless person is 'selfish'.

    Ugh.



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug. 12, 2001
    Location
    Trailer Trash Ammy!
    Posts
    19,520

    Default

    Responsible.

    I was an unwanted kid and there is really NO worse feeling. Don't do it if you're not willing to commit to it.



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan. 3, 2003
    Location
    St. Louis, MO USA
    Posts
    993

    Default

    I think it is more selfish to have a child because someone tells you you should. There are too many children in crisis in this country, it is selfish to bring one into the world if you are not fully committed to being a parent.
    My new mantra - \"Life is too short not to eat ice cream.\"
    ReRiders Clique



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov. 2, 2001
    Location
    Out for Lent
    Posts
    34,227

    Default

    well, much of societies programs rely on new (young) people paying up for the old ones, in a sense, yes it is.

    On the other hand, with less people contributing more to the pot and at how many billions total now, no.

    Not to mention some people are just not made to be parents, reproductive organs be damned.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bristol Bay View Post
    Try setting your broomstick to fly at a lower altitude.



  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2009
    Posts
    276

    Default

    No, having children because you think you're supposed to is selfish, and badgering people about having children is selfish.

    It is ENTIRELY up to you and your SO if you want to have children. It boggles my mind that anyone else thinks it's their business.

    I have 2 children because ... I really, really wanted them. Only good reason, I think.



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct. 7, 2006
    Location
    on and off the bit
    Posts
    4,441

    Default

    How can NOT having a child be selfish? How can not having ANYTHING be selfish?

    Some of the parents I see these days seem to be the most selfish people on earth. Everything is about them and their kids. Actually I put that in the wrong order. Everything is about their kids, and then themselves.

    I think that having kids can be a lot more selfish than not having them, unless one is seriously prepared to take on the responsibility of making those kids responsible members of society. Like helping kids who are already here. I know humans like other creatures are supposed to "be fruitful and multiply" but I wish they wouldn't be so selfish once they've added to the population.

    My parents had two children because they did not want to add any more to the world. Two of them, two offspring. Replacement, I guess, not multiplication!

    P.S. What a wonderful name you have given yourself, GraceLikeRain! I really like it.
    Founder of the People Who Prefer COTH Over FB Clique
    People Who Hate to Rush to Kill Wildlife Clique!
    "I Sing Silly Songs to My Animals!" Clique



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul. 30, 2005
    Location
    England
    Posts
    10,824

    Default

    I don't want offspring. If I did fall pregnant, I'd do right by the child, make sure it grew up wanted and loved, but it's not something I want to happen.
    Horse Show Names Free name website with over 6200 names. Want to add? PM me!



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep. 8, 2006
    Location
    Fredericksburg, VA
    Posts
    3,036

    Default

    That is without a doubt one of the dumbest, not to mention offensive, statements one human being can make to another.

    Right, because all those couples having kids out there are doing it out of some highly evolved sense of altruism. Please.



  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan. 25, 2009
    Posts
    1,571

    Default

    I think it is much worse to have a child that you aren't willing to raise. It is not as if the world is underpopulated.
    I do think that it can get a bit sticky with extended families. A lot of people really want grandkids, and it can get sticky.



  11. #11
    Join Date
    Apr. 17, 2012
    Posts
    1,961

    Default Are you KIDDING?

    This world is heading for 9 billion people--the vast majority of whom have zero prospect for a decent life. Virtually ALL of the problems facing us in 2012--the job market, availability and affordability of health services, energy, edible food, potable water, traffic, housing, pollution and even the probability of total war--are all directly linked and secondary to THIS. It's just like what happens when you have too many deer on a woodlot. And it's coming true, here and now, exactly as we were told it would back in the 70's before it somehow became taboo to talk about it.

    The SINGLE BEST THING I've done for this planet is declining to add any more human beings to its overloaded ecosphere!

    Where people get the notion that they have a RIGHT, let alone an OBLIGATION, to continue overpopulating the planet is beyond me. Are they so irreplaceably awesome that they must replicate themselves at any price? Even when they can't afford to give that kid one-half the advantages they themselves might have enjoyed? When breeding dogs or livestock you breed the BEST to the BEST and hope for the BEST. By that standard, the human population might actually achieve sustainability . . . and what I'm talking about is if you are in lousy health, are un-or under employed, have genetic diseases in your genes or can't afford prenatal care, FER CHRISSAKES please don't create a burden for the rest of us! "Love" is the worst criterion for life decision-making that's ever been; and sex out of turn has toppled empires. THINK FIRST!

    Hey, in the Olden Daze they barely knew how babies were made--gift or curse from God and all that jazz. Today we have CHOICES. Think long and hard about the world they will live in and ask yourself if this is the "contribution" you should really make.



  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jun. 15, 2010
    Posts
    2,558

    Default

    Glad to know I'm not crazy for being offended by that statement (even though considering reproducing is 5-10 years away for me). Right now I am firmly on no children ground and I don't foresee that changing.

    I had a "friend" recently tell me her reasoning behind getting pregnant was "I hate children and never wanted one but when I saw my sister's baby I decided I was done with the selfish childless part of my life."

    My SO quickly redirected the conversation as I scraped my jaw off the floor. I think good parents are selfless (to a degree) but I certainly do not think utilizing your uterus magically makes you selfless.



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec. 25, 2008
    Posts
    265

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SwampYankee View Post
    This world is heading for 9 billion people--the vast majority of whom have zero prospect for a decent life. Virtually ALL of the problems facing us in 2012--the job market, availability and affordability of health services, energy, edible food, potable water, traffic, housing, pollution and even the probability of total war--are all directly linked and secondary to THIS. It's just like what happens when you have too many deer on a woodlot. And it's coming true, here and now, exactly as we were told it would back in the 70's before it somehow became taboo to talk about it.

    The SINGLE BEST THING I've done for this planet is declining to add any more human beings to its overloaded ecosphere!

    Where people get the notion that they have a RIGHT, let alone an OBLIGATION, to continue overpopulating the planet is beyond me. Are they so irreplaceably awesome that they must replicate themselves at any price? Even when they can't afford to give that kid one-half the advantages they themselves might have enjoyed? When breeding dogs or livestock you breed the BEST to the BEST and hope for the BEST. By that standard, the human population might actually achieve sustainability . . . and what I'm talking about is if you are in lousy health, are un-or under employed, have genetic diseases in your genes or can't afford prenatal care, FER CHRISSAKES please don't create a burden for the rest of us! "Love" is the worst criterion for life decision-making that's ever been; and sex out of turn has toppled empires. THINK FIRST!

    Hey, in the Olden Daze they barely knew how babies were made--gift or curse from God and all that jazz. Today we have CHOICES. Think long and hard about the world they will live in and ask yourself if this is the "contribution" you should really make.
    I second everything in this post. I have not ever wanted to have a child, but if the urge suddenly hit me, I would be adopting one of the countless children who are born with almost no hope of a decent life. The original question could easily be reversed: is it selfish to have children with the world the way it is....



  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jan. 28, 2003
    Location
    Hollywood, but not the one where they have the Oscars!
    Posts
    7,873

    Default

    My mom said I was defective because I didnt want kids....see moms thread....sigh
    "You can't really debate with someone who has a prescient invisible friend"
    carolprudm



  15. #15
    Join Date
    Apr. 28, 2008
    Posts
    7,634

    Default

    Neither one. Selfishness is not determined by the number of offspring you produce. Plenty of selfish people, and unselfish ones, in both situations.

    SwampYankee, I don't think the world's that bad, really. I'd certainly rather live in it than not. Having a child was not the most selfish thing I've done. Having a farm full of horses likely is.



  16. #16
    Join Date
    Jul. 3, 2012
    Posts
    2,466

    Default

    You don't want to know!



  17. #17
    Join Date
    Mar. 9, 2006
    Location
    South-Central PA
    Posts
    2,321

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by iloverocky View Post
    I second everything in this post. I have not ever wanted to have a child, but if the urge suddenly hit me, I would be adopting one of the countless children who are born with almost no hope of a decent life. The original question could easily be reversed: is it selfish to have children with the world the way it is....
    My sentiments exactly!
    Cindy



  18. #18
    Join Date
    Jul. 23, 2007
    Posts
    749

    Default

    I never wanted any, never had any. No one's responsibility but mine to raise it, no thanks. Didn't care what anyone thought. No regrets.



  19. #19
    Join Date
    Oct. 22, 2003
    Posts
    1,895

    Default

    I can't really think of anything more selfish and arrogant then declaring "I am good enough to have a baby and contribute my genes to the continuation of the human race"

    Frankly, I don't think many of us could pass the SPT or get into the Premium Mare Book. :P
    "The nice thing about memories is the good ones are stronger and linger longer than the bad and we sure have some incredibly good memories." - EverythingButWings



  20. #20
    Join Date
    Apr. 17, 2012
    Posts
    1,961

    Default

    Yeah, you said it. I see joggers on the road wingin' and paddlin' with their thighs rubbing and say, "Mother o' the Dawn, fer gawdsakes don't breed to THAT!" And don't get me started on the STUPID ones . . .



Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 110
    Last Post: Sep. 17, 2013, 07:44 PM
  2. Replies: 14
    Last Post: Sep. 16, 2013, 06:46 PM
  3. "Listen Close" - Horses and Special Needs Children
    By Mike Matson in forum Off Course
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: Nov. 2, 2011, 07:31 PM
  4. Replies: 131
    Last Post: Jul. 5, 2010, 10:28 AM
  5. Replies: 59
    Last Post: Oct. 17, 2008, 07:52 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
randomness