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  1. #41
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    I think some Eagles songs are prime candidates for rewrites. Maybe 'Desperado' and 'Lyin' Eyes'. Any takers?
    'Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.'
    - Pablo Picasso



  2. #42
    DMK is offline remain.com Premium Member
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    offcourse - I'll stick to songwriting - my talents are extremely offensive to the ears even in the shower [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
    Definition of "Horse": a 4 legged mammal looking for an inconvenient place and expensive way to die. Any day they choose not to execute the Master Plan is just more time to perfect it. Be Very Afraid.



  3. #43
    Join Date
    Jul. 21, 1999
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    Houston, Texas
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    Sung to the tune of the Beach Boys' I Get Around

    I Jump Around

    Round round jump around
    I jump around
    Yeah
    Jump around round round I jump around
    I jump around
    Jump around round round I jump around
    From town to town
    Jump around round round I jump around
    I'm a real hot head
    Jump around round round I jump around
    'Cause I'm a Thoroughbred

    I'm gettin' bugged trotting up and down the same old ring
    I gotta finda new show where I can do my thing

    My rider and me are getting real well known
    Yeah, the warmbloods know us and they leave us alone

    I jump around
    Jump around round round I jump around
    From town to town
    Jump around round round I jump around
    I always get my spot
    Jump around round round I jump around
    I do what I been taught

    Jump around round round I jump around
    I jump around
    Round
    Jump around round round oooo
    Wah wa ooo
    Wah wa ooo
    Wah wa ooo

    We always take the blue cause I've never been beat
    And I've never missed yet when I get my treats

    All of the rounds are steady cause it wouldn't be right
    To leave a stride out when in the judge's sight

    I jump around
    Jump around round round I jump around
    From town to town
    Jump around round round I jump around
    I do a perfect eight
    Jump around round round I jump around
    'Cause I have learned to wait

    Jump around round round I jump around
    I jump around
    Round
    Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah
    Round round jump around
    I jump around
    Yeah
    Jump around round round I jump around
    Jump around round round I jump around
    Wah wa ooo....
    "I don't want to sound like a broken record here, but why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?" Dave Barry



  4. #44
    Join Date
    Dec. 14, 1999
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    I am very impressed....and inspired too:

    Here's one for all of the Horse Show Mom's (to Carole King's "Tapestry")

    ( Hope it's not too corny for ya'll! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif[/img] )

    My life has been a tapestry of driving to and from
    The barn, the shows, the tack shop
    It's a never changing view
    A wondrous world I've learned of
    With bits and boots and gloves
    A tapestry where girls reign free
    Their horses are their love

    Once amid the dark, dusty aisles of the barn
    There came another new horse, and this one, it was for sale
    She had no ribbons to her name
    And she needed work to start
    But her face was sweet, her soul was good,
    And she won my daughter's heart

    I moved with some uncertainty as if I didn't know
    Whether we should buy her
    Or should we let her go
    Finally, the answer came, the horse we had to buy
    And my child was so happy

    Soon within my tapestry along the horse show trail
    I sat and watched my "girls" go round
    Trying even if they fail
    A missed lead change, a spooky trip,
    Make it hard to be top gun
    But they are a team, they work real hard
    And they have a lot of fun

    As I watch them at the barn, it's suddenly all clear
    The ribbons never mattered, it's the bond that is so dear
    A love between a girl and horse, it's the greatest gift I know
    So I'll cheer them on, driving near and far, and I'll never let them go... I'll never let them go....



  5. #45
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    Nov. 9, 2000
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    If we have a horse show mom convention sometime, that will definitely be the themesong....boy, could i relate!



  6. #46
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    Mar. 14, 2000
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    WA. The Evergreen State Where The Horses Are Forever Green
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    You have really have to get the COTH to publish these!
    I can see it now, just like the Cooky McClung books! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif[/img]



  7. #47
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    That was great. Not too corny at all! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
    "I don't want to sound like a broken record here, but why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?" Dave Barry



  8. #48
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    Jun. 30, 2000
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    I am currently working on a horsey version of "Satisfaction" - Bare with me - should be done by 4:30 [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img]



  9. #49
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    "Bare with me" - i like it, very appropriate for the song in question.....are you talking eastern time BTW!



  10. #50
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    The creative juices were flowing pretty naturally today...so here is "8 Per Fect Jumps" - sung to the toon of the Rolling Stone's "Satisfaction" - enjoy!

    I can't get no 8 per fect jumps
    I can't get no 8 per fect jumps
    'Cause I look, and I pull, and I push, and I kick
    I can't get no, I can't get no

    When I'm ridin' on my horse
    And that man comes on the loud speak er
    And he's tellin' me I'm on the deck
    Be at the ingate...ready to go in
    The pressure mounts and I get psyched
    I can't get no, oh no no no
    Chip Chip Chip, that's what I do

    I can't get no 8 per fect jumps
    I can't get no 8 per fect jumps
    'Cause I look, and I pull, and I push, and I kick
    I can't get no, I can't get no

    When I'm comin out the ring
    And the trainer comes up to tell me
    How my horse needs some zing
    Well I just want to tell him to give me Rox Dene
    Instead he goes off flirting
    I can't get no, oh no no no
    Chip Chip Chip, that's what I do

    I can't get no 8 per fect jumps,
    I can't get no courses without lumps.
    'Cause I look, and I push, and I pull, and I kick
    I can't get no, I can't get no

    When I'm ridin' round the course
    And I'm chippin' this and I'm long to that
    And I'm tryin' to make my trainer proud
    Who tells me baby better come back later next week
    'Cause I see you're on losing streak
    I can't get no, oh no no no
    Chip Chip Chip, that's what I do

    I can't get no, I can't get no
    I can't get no 8 per fect jumps
    No 8 per fect jumps, no 8 per fect jumps, no 8 per fect jumps



  11. #51
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    Thanks guys - this is fun, isn't it? [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img]

    offcourse: a Horse Show Mom convention - what an awesome idea! At the very least, we ought to have our own clique here on the bb, don't you think? [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]



  12. #52
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    Definitely a clique - no doubt one that no one else wants to belong to, lol! The funny thing is, all these young kids of the BB, someday they'll be horse show moms too...!

    I've come to enjoy horse shows a lot more once i got to know a few of the moms from the "other" barns...otherwise, there can be this competitive curtain of silence...! At one show a few years ago, I was watching one of my daughter's "rivals" - at the time, they tended to finish 1,2 in their equi classes. Anyway, the other girl had a really nice round in a jr hunter class, definitely was the winning round and no question better than my daughter's on that particular day...I had been second guessing the scores and sent up a cheer when her daughter won...the mom (who had never spoken to me before) looked at me and came over to ask why i had cheered - i explained and from then on she was friendly...so the more moms get together the better, i think!



  13. #53
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    Jan. 7, 2001
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    Horseheads,NY
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    You guys!!!! Too funny!!!! As I sit here wiping the tears of laughter from my eyes..I'm in awe of your prose-prowess..Especially after my less-than-stellar performance in my lesson today.Thanks, I needed it! I printed the "per fect 8" for my trainer, she's always telling me "it's only 8 little fences, what is so hard?"



  14. #54
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    Sorry to hear about that skysmom!

    You guys are too funny!!!!!



  15. #55
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    Sorry, so close, but yet so far.

    Seriously, I wish I had the talent of recreating a song like you guys!!!!! (can't sing for the life of me, but)



  16. #56
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    VTRider, another great one! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
    "I don't want to sound like a broken record here, but why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?" Dave Barry



  17. #57
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    Nov. 23, 1999
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    I followed Sleepy's suggestions and rewrote the Eagles' "Desperado"

    Jumper Rider
    Why don't you come to your senses
    You've been crashing through fences
    For so long now
    Oh you're a brave one
    But I know that you've been a lawn dart
    Those courses that please you can trick you somehow

    Don't you gallop to the combination
    He'll refuse it if he's able
    You know the inside turn is always the best bet
    And it seems to me some fine mounts
    Have been walkin' through your barn aisle
    But you only buy the ones that you can't ride

    Jumper Rider
    Oh you ain't gettin' no faster
    Your spurs and your big crop
    Are making him nuts
    And time faults? Oh time faults
    That's just some trainers talkin'
    Your horse he would rather jump this course all alone

    Don't your feet get stuck on your stirrup pads
    Your horse won't go and you have to add
    Should you do the seven or the eight?
    You're dropping all the rails and poles
    Ain't it funny how the ribbons go away

    Jumper Rider
    Why don't you come to your senses
    Stop jumping those fences
    Trot through the gate
    You may be off course
    But there's a trainer to school you
    You better let that poor judge buzz you
    Let that poor judge buzz you
    You better let that poor judge buzz you
    Before it's too late



  18. #58
    DMK is offline remain.com Premium Member
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    I am in awe... these are all great!
    Definition of "Horse": a 4 legged mammal looking for an inconvenient place and expensive way to die. Any day they choose not to execute the Master Plan is just more time to perfect it. Be Very Afraid.



  19. #59
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    Jan. 3, 2000
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    PA and CA
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    Aren't you all glad you chose to ride---can you imagine making song parodies about, oh, say, fishing? LOL, perhaps golf? [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]

    I am highly impressed by everyone's ability, you are all talented, I bow! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif[/img]

    Forgot to mention, I believe that someone should remake "Hotel California" perhaps into "HITS Show California" [?] I challenge someone to try, I refuse to do it myself! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]



  20. #60
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    Nov. 23, 1999
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    In the dark desert Sandland
    Sandy wind in my hair
    One smell of manure dust
    Rising up through the air
    Up ahead in the distance
    I couldn't see any light
    The sand grew heavy and my sight grew dim
    I had to scratch for the night

    There we stood at the ingate
    I heard the judge's bell
    And I was thinking to myself
    This could be heaven or this could be hell
    The she picked up her left lead
    And she towed me away
    There were voices on the loudspeaker
    Thought I heard them say

    Welcome to the HITS Show Calfornia
    Such a muddy place
    Sand blows in your face
    No extra stalls at the HITS Show California
    In the early year
    You can find it here

    Her bit is definitely twisted
    She follows all the new trends
    She has a lot of pretty pretty grooms
    That she calls friends
    How they dance in the barn aisles
    Sweet horse show sweat
    Some course to remember
    Some course to forget

    So I called to my trainer
    Please bring me my crop
    And she said
    "You only need that when your horse wants to stop"
    And still those announcers are calling from far away
    Call you out of the schooling ring
    Just to hear them say

    Welcome to the HITS Show California
    Such a muddy place
    Sand blows in your face
    Bring a lot of loot
    And your rubber boots

    Oxers down the long side
    Combinations aren't nice
    And she said "We're all exhibitors here
    Paying an outrageous price"
    And in their jumper classic
    They galloped in the two
    The stab them with their steely spurs
    But they just can't win the blue

    Last thing I remember
    I was jumping through the four
    I had to make a rollback turn
    To the jump I jumped before
    Relax, said my trainer
    You're the last once to be seen
    You can gallop any time you like
    But you can't ever lean



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