[riderboy]

Oh, and Riderboy, the guy flipping the burgers IS high. That's just being resourceful, what with the munchies and all.

Ha! True confessions, back in the 70's that burger flipper was me. But Acme in our profession this topic is very, very sensitive and important. "Impaired" for us and our patients is damn serious stuff.

[JWB]

I've been on this board for less than 30 days. You have no way of knowing that I am NOT a pimply 12-year-old itching her toes in a double-wide in the boondocks, or an insurance industry spy, someone who can't ride in a boxcar with the door shut, or for that matter an official of the USEA or even the DEA. The only thing I revealed about myself is that I might live in the Northeast USA and I might be a little ignorant on this topic. Or at least that is the persona I chose to show for these purposes.

Hahahaha!! I've got my own set of issues. Fortunately paranoia isn't among them. I am pretty certain that the USEA and DEA are not trolling bulletin boards hoping to dig up dirt on my use of medications, and hey, if they are, they can just look at my medical armband!

My purpose on the other thread (ya know, the one where you decided to label me a drug user) was to let people know that there is no reason to be ashamed of seeking help for a condition that is limiting their enjoyment of life. I said it in the other post and I'll say it again here - I am not ashamed of it. I have nothing to hide.

It's sad that people like you want to put a stigma on treatment or scare people off (how many times have you told people not to take their kids to therapists because therapists just steal their money and will make them unemployable in the future?) My only regret in terms of my mental health is that I didn't address my issues much sooner.

[ACMEeventing]

Wait, wait, wait--I'm moving kinda slow this morning and this just sunk in:


You. Go. To. The. H/J. Forum?

What?!? No! I never. What I mean to say is . . . um . . . I, er . . . Is that my phone?

Oh, okay. When I really get desperate for a giggle I go to H/J. When I want to feel completely inadequate I go to Dressage. When I want to lurk I go to Racing. A little variety never hurt

[ACMEeventing]

Ha! True confessions, back in the 70's that burger flipper was me. But Acme in our profession this topic is very, very sensitive and important. "Impaired" for us and our patients is damn serious stuff.

True that.

[skydy]

ACME,

The DEA is watching.

You'd BETTER have a prescription for that cowbell...

[ACMEeventing]

ACME,

The DEA is watching.

You'd BETTER have a prescription for that cowbell...

It's all good, man. It just smoothes me out. I can quit if I want to.

If you find yourself in need of some cowbell, I know a guy . . .

[skydy]

It's all good, man. It just smoothes me out. I can quit if I want to.

If you find yourself in need of some cowbell, I know a guy . . .

Thanks ACME , but I've always found cowbell a little overwhelming, it just doesn't mellow me out..

I think it could actually be a distraction, especially in the dressage ring..

[deltawave]

I've been on this board for less than 30 days. You have no way of knowing that I am NOT a pimply 12-year-old itching her toes in a double-wide in the boondocks, or an insurance industry spy, someone who can't ride in a boxcar with the door shut, or for that matter an official of the USEA or even the DEA. The only thing I revealed about myself is that I might live in the Northeast USA and I might be a little ignorant on this topic. Or at least that is the persona I chose to show for these purposes.

You'll get over it, and yourself. Stick around. You obviously have both a thick skin and a sense of humor. It's perfectly OK to have opinions, even ones that don't rub everyone the right way. Perfectly OK to defend them. Perfectly OK to go off the deep end every once in a while. But if pot-stirring is ALL you really want to do, it gets old pretty quickly.

Just chill out if everyone doesn't see the world your way. Be helpful, be polite, live and let live, and this is a pretty cool place to hang out.

[quietann]

Just my personal opinion but if you have such anxiety or fear or whatever that you are throwing up or havng severe panic before riding (especially cross country) - I think you've picked the wrong sport. This does not mean that most competitors in any sport don't get an adrenaline rush - it's what gets the athlete to perform at their top levels.

Very disconcerting to read some of the "oh yeah everybody does it" retorts. Actually the vast majority don't do it. I absolutely believe the current trend to medicate anyone who even gets a little panicy about anthing is out of control. If you can't control yourself going into the starting box - how will you control yourself on course over large obstacles?

So... what would you say to Pippa Funnell or any of the other really, really good riders who get bad nerves in the XC start box... and then go out and win?

As many have pointed out, for a lot of people (myself included), "show nerves" are mostly anticipatory and once one is out there actually doing the test or the course or whatever, anxiety is much less of an issue. I don't event, thanks to an accident that ended my jumping, but still do dressage, and have scratched from a few tests because of seriously bad show nerves... and later wished I'd had someone there to push me to just *try* to do a test. But I am kind to myself about it (and the meds I take help me be kind to myself rather than spiraling into terrible self-criticism and doubt about my abilities.)

Oddly enough, I actually agree that the medical community tends to over-medicate, but it's rare for someone to get a Xanax Rx just because of a little nervousness. In fact, I could bore you all endlessly with my thoughts on how *individuals* get medicated because *society* is sick, but I'll spare you all.

[ise@ssl]

Quietann - YOU WORDS ..."bad nerves". I didn't use that term did I? So your entire premise in your post falls apart. I clearly referred to people with severe issues - didn't I?

[quietann]

Quietann - YOU WORDS ..."bad nerves". I didn't use that term did I? So your entire premise in your post falls apart. I clearly referred to people with severe issues - didn't I?

No, you were the one who mentioned throwing up in the starting box as a sign that someone has picked the wrong sport. I countered that PF and others have been observed to throw up in the start box, and which has been ascribed -- by these UL riders themselves-- to nerves. I used the phrase "bad nerves" as a proxy for throwing up in the starting box.

[Duramax]

Someone asked upthread - "How does taking the edge off nerves before a ride affect the horse? "

Seems to me it could well be a GOOD THING for the horse.

So here's Nervous Nancy practicing at home. There's just her, or her and her trainer, and she and Dobbin are one. Each knows their job, it's fun, the communication between them is smooth and seamless. Happy rider, happy horse.

Big Show Day comes along. Nervous Nancy climbs in the saddle with a roiling stomach, is taking quick short breaths because she's feeling suffocated by all those people in the warm up. And the judge is looking at her. And suddenly she feels like she's never sat on a horse before, her motions are jerky, her mind is playing tricks on her and she can't focus on the job at hand.

Dobbin underneath her is understandably confused and worried. His person doesn't feel right, she's not making sense with her aids, it's all so different. She's obviously tense & scared - there must be tigers out there. So he gets spooky, misunderstands the odd cues he's given, stops at a fence because there's a panicky death grip on the reins...


Riding while totally high or bombed is obviously not a good thing. But I think its a stretch to compare a six pack with a swig, and if a doc suggests that a low dose of Xanax wouldn't hurt, then go for it. Yes those thing slow down reactions, THAT's Why They Work! The rider needs to slow down, not be so hyper-reactive. Overthinking and doing too much can be as bad as not doing anything.

Don't forget, riders aren't alone out there, there is the horse and they know their job (or they should, but that's another thread). They shouldn't need to have every step micromanaged out there, it's a partnership, and IMO a well schooled horse with a rider who's head is in the game -chemically managed or not- is far safer than a pair who's got half of it fighting a panic attack.

Saje, AMEN! I love you!! You nailed it!

[Duramax]

In hind sight I think warm-up would have been much safer if I had just taken the Xanax I have been prescribed.

My thoughts exactly!!! (In regards to myself, haha!)

[wookie]

your at a usea sanctioned event. your fire breathing ottb is behaving like a red ottb should...get my drift. a very official person comes to you at your trailer. you have scored a 57.5 in dressage and are hanging on to last place with every fiber of your being. your simply happy you crossed the finish line in one piece...with clean britches ( in more ways than one).

you look puzzled....my xc time was 8 minutes. did it look too fast? i had to make those large gallop circles between every fence...you think to yourself. hmmmmm.

now they ask for a urine cup. you say... hannibal lector just peed between fence 17 and 18. no mam he says... yours!!!
crap...you think.. did i bathe in vetrolin? did i eat turkey with tryptophan...will that night out with adult beverages test today? willl my hormone replacement for menopause cause me to be published in bad boy/girl list in us eventing mag?
you respond sir...i may already have produced a sample..just not in a cup.

you sit on your cooler and then he asks....mam... i need to examine your cooler too. crap...busted. so much for eventing with an edge.

[SwampYankee]

THANK YOU! OMG a sense of humor! Buy you a beer?

[saje]

Saje, AMEN! I love you!! You nailed it!

Thank you It's nice to be appreciated

[Horsegal984]

After spending to many shows on a horse who refused to play outside his own home sandbox, getting repeatedly thrown/excused/or retiring after the 2nd fence, yes I had some MAJOR show anxiety. Started back on a trainers horse, who is beyond solid at the level, and even though we were schooling 2'9" courses at home the thought of a 2' vertical in warmup made me feel like I was going to hurl. There was no way that I was going to get over my nerves without just DOING it, but with the panic attacks I would have I couldn't even remember to steer. So I would drink a bloody mary or two while tacking up, and it was just enough that when I went into that ring and rode like crapola to the first fence for a refusal, my brain was relaxed enough to stop, circle, represent with my leg ON, and finish a beautiful round. After a few positive show experiences I realized that my nerves were less and less, i just needed help getting over the hump to making it enjoyabe again.

And I too would like ot know who can take 250mg of Xanax, 1/4mg is all I need for a panic attack!

[teddygirl]

I think it's impossible to know someone's situation without being in their shoes, so those holier-than-thou types who are so brave and wonderful that they never need to take any meds or a drink, we bow to your superiority. Now go away. We're mixing margaritas here.

And SY, what'cha doin' on the h/j board complaining about us? Really, you're comparing yourself to that person who wants to hire "Mexicans" because they're cheap but isn't sure if they can be trusted? You think people who don't like racists are over sensitive like people who think you shouldn't judge people on meds when you haven't been there to hear what their doctor says?

Yes, COTH people can react very strongly to stuff, sometimes too strongly. But many people don't like to be judged when you don't know their situation. And I wouldn't bond with that h/j person. Not a good place to go.

[Trixie]

Particularly entertaining were the ad-hominem's and demands for an "apology." I'm to "apologize" for having my opinion? Do you regularly apologize for yours? I have opinions on a lot of things and so do you. Do we "apologize" for ALL of 'em? Are you freaking kidding?

I'm afraid I fail to see how someone can start a thread that is specifically referencing another poster, then proceed to accuse them of "abusing" drugs, and then backtrack to state that they TOTALLY meant "general" drug "abuse" and not prescription medication and of course it wasn't specific. This also includes some pretty specific judgments about her condition.

SY, I have to say, to put it politely, I feel this is absolutely inappropriate.

And then, your version of an apology, which is apparently to tell the lot of us that we are the only ones "responsible" for how we feel, when YOU are the one who is acting poorly. You don't need to "apologize for your opinion," but it might be good if you'd apologize for your behavior.

[Mosey_2003]

Aaaaaand this would be why I don't ride at all anymore. And why I waited 8 years to get help and nearly killed myself. And why I can't even tell my own parents why I went to the doctor. Because, you know, if you have anxiety or depression, everyone says you should get help and there's nothing to be ashamed of, but, you know, thank GOD they're not "abnormal" like you poor weak-willed people that can't just suck it up.

You can have my small dosage of Xanax when you literally pry it out of my cold, dead hands, thank you very much.

And bless your heart, SwampYankee.