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  1. #121
    Join Date
    May. 1, 2000
    Location
    Groton, MA
    Posts
    582

    Default

    Jair, I'm one of the lurkers you referred to in a previous post. I've been enjoying this thread for the last week. Not to leave anyone out (EVERYONE'S posts have been really great and thought-provoking), but I've especially enjoyed the exchanges between Pacificsolo and Jair.



  2. #122
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2000
    Location
    VA, but visitor to Garrison & Toronto
    Posts
    13,792

    Default

    OK, Jair. . .Since the "marry" thread was deleted, I'll just have to post here to find out more about your brother-in-law and his uncle! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] 35 yrs old is pretty close to my ex, but 65, hmmmmm....still a possibility.......Need more info! LOL

    Oh, Nancey -- I can definitely sympathize with the cat issue w/ the toilet paper. One of mine used to not like it when I was away!!

    [This message has been edited by Duffy (edited 07-21-2000).]
    \"Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion. It seizes a person whole and, once it has done so, he will have to accept that his life will be radically changed.\" -- Ralph Waldo E



  3. #123
    Join Date
    Jun. 20, 2000
    Location
    Whistler, BC
    Posts
    2,974

    Default

    Thank you very much Horsenut! Glad you have been reading. Its been quite the thread. BTW I was a chronic lurker for awhile myself - till I came out of the closet (pun intended) ! LOL

    As for you Duffy - what happened to the "marry" thread? That was getting pretty funny. Oh well, I have know doubt that we'll all find another silly topic one day... but that was pretty good for a friday!

    [This message has been edited by Jair (edited 07-21-2000).]
    You Strike Me Still



  4. #124
    Join Date
    May. 31, 2000
    Location
    Citra, FL
    Posts
    532

    Default

    Why did the marry thread go away? I've actually been working today rather then lurking and next thing I know - >poof< gone.

    Speaking of marriage, how many places allow gay marriages (whether they are rich or poor)?? I have a hard time seeing what the difference is between "normal" marriages and same sex. Why is this such a hard policy decision?

    The place I work just instituted a policy that allows health care plan to cover same sex, gay couples. Pretty risque for the conservative company that Im with. The lawyers were going crazy with all the implications. For example if you are not married and are living with a hetero partner, cant claim them, but if you are living with the same sex and say you are gay, no problem.

    I can see both sides, but it should be interesting to see what develops.



  5. #125
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2000
    Location
    VA, but visitor to Garrison & Toronto
    Posts
    13,792

    Default

    I'd printed out the "marry rich" thread for my sister's amusement/entertainment last night -- glad I did, except for the additions today before it was deleted!!
    \"Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion. It seizes a person whole and, once it has done so, he will have to accept that his life will be radically changed.\" -- Ralph Waldo E



  6. #126
    Join Date
    May. 1, 2000
    Location
    Groton, MA
    Posts
    582

    Default

    Duffy, me too! I just found the "Marry Rich" thread today and printed it out a couple of hours ago. Thank goodness! I would have been p***ed off if I decided to wait until after work and came back to find it gone!



  7. #127
    Join Date
    Jun. 20, 2000
    Location
    Whistler, BC
    Posts
    2,974

    Default

    Hi Retrophish!

    Funny, was just talking about gay marriages with another friend. The province I live in has just declared that they are going to fight the Canadian government to allow gay marriages here - they feel that it goes against the charter of human rights by denying "freedom of choice". Good for them! I actually believe quite strongly in gay marriages - I think that if two people love eachother and feel that they would like to have their relationship sealed with a special ceremony that also has legal benefits, then they should be allowed too. It would certianly help in legal terms for those gay couples who have been together for years and when one dies - the vulture of a family swoops in a takes everything without a dime going to the partner of x number of years!

    I think the problem with it being recognized comes back to the issue that "marriage should bear fruit", and that as most gay couples aren't going to produce offspring, then there is no validity in the marriage.

    Funny, because in general I see lots of hetero couples not bothering to get married anymore at all because of the expense/hassle. But after so many years the common-law benefits kick in so there is still some legality to it. I believe some states/provinces (including mine) have common-law benefits for gay couples in place at the moment. A step in the right direction I think!

    Glad to hear your company gives same-sex benefits Retro!

    Hey Duffy - glad you saved the thread!

    [This message has been edited by Jair (edited 07-21-2000).]
    You Strike Me Still



  8. #128
    Join Date
    May. 31, 2000
    Location
    Citra, FL
    Posts
    532

    Default

    What about marriages between man and women that dont result in children? My boss and I were actually talking about this the other day after he read a super interesting article in one of his professional journals. The article was very scientific in discussing what really is a male and a female in terms of same sex marriages. All that xy, xx, xxy,xxyy......

    Anyway, for each argument he posed for why same sex marriages shouldnt be allowed - I was able to illustrate the same example in "legal" marriages.

    For example, he said, All sorts of folks could just pair up for different financial benefits. Oh yeah, never see that in hetero marriages - wasnt that the basis of the "marriage" thread.

    Then he went for the kid thing - not only are there straights that cant, wont have kids, but then there are the Melissa Etheridge, Jodi Fosters that seem to be doing ok.

    I have to agree, Jair, if two people want to be together, no matter the perceived advantages, I think it should be an equitable right. I frankly cant see how anyone can believe different. Each person is free to make thier marriage as sacred or business like as they want, like religion. I think the marriage laws are an example of their not being a separation of church and state. I think.



  9. #129
    Join Date
    Feb. 24, 1999
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    16,625

    Default

    The "marry rich" thread must have been deleted by the person who started it, because neither Weatherford or I did. We'll always tell you if we delete something, so if you don't see an explanation from us, just assume the person who started the thread deleted their initial post.



  10. #130
    Join Date
    Jul. 21, 1999
    Location
    Houston, Texas
    Posts
    11,621

    Default

    Oops. I fear the person who started the "marry rich" thread was serious, and we didn't take it quite that way. None of us really meant we would marry for money, but it was all in good fun. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img] I hope she wasn't offended.
    "I don't want to sound like a broken record here, but why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?" Dave Barry



  11. #131
    Join Date
    Jun. 20, 2000
    Location
    Full time in Delhi, NY!
    Posts
    6,398

    Default

    What do you mean, None of us would marry for money????? Heaven knows I wouldn't marry without it! Pardon moi, but to paraphrase someone's mother, "You can fall in love with someone rich even faster than someone poor." At least I can, I'm pretty sure Duffy could, I know Colin's not checking out homeless men before moving back to M'burg. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
    ~Kryswyn~ Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo
    Check out my Kryswyn JRTs on Facebook

    "Life is merrier with a terrier!"



  12. #132
    Join Date
    Jan. 21, 2000
    Posts
    4,991

    Default

    I work in a large well known international orgainization in Washington. Our medical, travel, educational,and financial benefits have always included domestic partners whether gay or straight. In fact the benefits can extend to whomever you choose One of the main reasons, I love the City and even though I love riding am leary about living too far out for the farm is the loss of that diversity. I know it is not far and completely prejudiced to think of people in rural areas as rednecks and bigots. The only problem is look at poor Mathew Shepard, and now most recently the Gay African American in West Virginia, who was beaten to death.
    "All life is precious"
    Sophie Scholl



  13. #133
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2000
    Location
    VA, but visitor to Garrison & Toronto
    Posts
    13,792

    Default

    Hey PacificSolo - Where's that millionaire you passed on? LOL -- Just kidding. . .My ex and I didn't have much of anything when we got married. . .Well, except for quite a bit of credit card debt! (seemed quite fashionable at the time) [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif[/img] He has moved on to someone else. It's been painful, but it's getting better. But, no, I too would not marry for just money. However, I would not determine not to fall in love with someone just because they did either! LOL [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] But, I will also say that my criteria are not quite as naive as they were the first time around either. I will be much pickier all the way around with my next significant other, if I should be so lucky as to find one. On the other hand, (yet again LOL), deep down, I have to admit, I'm still a hopeless romantic, I'm afraid. . .
    \"Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion. It seizes a person whole and, once it has done so, he will have to accept that his life will be radically changed.\" -- Ralph Waldo E



  14. #134
    Join Date
    May. 6, 1999
    Location
    Ocala, FL
    Posts
    10,437

    Default

    I'm glad someone brought up the WV incident. Right now it is under discussion as a hate crime and the national media is jumping on that bandwagon. But I'm here in WV, only about 20 miles from that town, and the LOCAL media has had more details that the national media don't want to be bothered with, details that do NOT make it sound like a hate crime, but rather an association that went really, really sour.

    I think we have to take care that we don't automatically label something the worst it can be just because it shares a trait with that category. A gay guy who gets murdered isn't necessarily the victim of a (prejudicially motivated) hate crime. The WV incident--given the background of the victim and the town, his family and the accused's families--sure sounds more like hate from rage, not race or sexuality.
    Sportponies Unlimited
    Athletic Thoroughbred crosses for the highly motivated, smaller rider.



  15. #135
    Join Date
    Jun. 20, 2000
    Location
    Whistler, BC
    Posts
    2,974

    Default

    Oh Moesha! You have brought up the saddest topic of all time - Matthew Shephard. Hearing about him was probably the only time something on the news made me cry - still feel like it whenever I see a picture of him. He was so young and just because of someone's bigotry and fear, he never got to experience life - let alone love.

    Pwynn - I never hear about anything in WV which isn't surprising since when was the last time you heard anything about my city on the news down there? But you brought up a good point - it is too easy to assume that just because a murder/crime victim is gay that the death/incident was a result of that person's sexuality. Although there have been many many hate crimes against us (including one here a few months ago) terrible things can happen to anyone, regardless of race, religioun, sexuality, ethnicity etc. Lets face it, some people don't deserve to be considered "human".

    and gay men can be evil too - just look at the Talented Mr. Ripley! (why you would ever want to knock of Jude Law is beyond me! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] ) Apparently some factions in the gay community wanted the film seriously edited as they didn't wasnt a gay character to be a sociopath as well. Felt it "fuel the fires" against them so to speak.

    Duffy - am still working on my uncle for you. Will keep you posted. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img]

    Hi PacificSolo! Thanks for the new computer offer - might take you up on that one day!! LOL. I am at the library again (its raining and my partner wanted to look for a book - so I had a good excuse to come on line!).
    You Strike Me Still



  16. #136
    Join Date
    Jul. 9, 2000
    Location
    Tel Aviv, Israel
    Posts
    286

    Default

    The "should I marry for money" thread had it
    all wrong. If you've ever read bumper stickers in Los Angeles you've seen: "I didn't marry for money--I DIVORCED for it!".
    Under carefully controlled conditions of breeding, training, and care, a horse will do whatever it damn well pleases.



  17. #137
    Join Date
    Feb. 13, 2000
    Location
    VA, but visitor to Garrison & Toronto
    Posts
    13,792

    Default

    Who has seen the new Ellen DeGeneres comedy special on HBO? I thought is was GREAT
    \"Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion. It seizes a person whole and, once it has done so, he will have to accept that his life will be radically changed.\" -- Ralph Waldo E



  18. #138
    Join Date
    Feb. 4, 2000
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    395

    Default

    I REALLY REALLY REALLY wanted to see it, but I don't have HBO! Grrrrr! Anyway, I am glad it was funny. Ellen can make me laugh, anytime, anyday!



  19. #139
    Join Date
    May. 15, 1999
    Location
    The top of Schooley's Mountain, NJ
    Posts
    12,539

    Default

    Any time anyone is injured in any way, just because of a "difference" that is equally evil. I hope you will all remember that when you attack someone personally for having an idea with which you disagree.

    It's fine to debate the issue, to explore the ideas that built the opinions, but never to seek to humiliate or intimidate someone for being different.

    We have on this thread discussed our differences, we have discussed many of the taboo subjects like religion, politics and honesty. We can discuss and learn from each other about why or how these things came to be, if they are valid. Some may even change their minds.

    [This message has been edited by Snowbird (edited 07-29-2000).]



  20. #140
    Guest

    Default

    WOW-what a thread!!
    It has been a pleasant surprise to read through EVERY post. Imagine - all this on the COTH BB- whooda thunk it?



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