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View Poll Results: Would this offend you?

Voters
71. You may not vote on this poll
  • Yes?

    59 83.10%
  • No?

    12 16.90%
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 21 to 37 of 37
  1. #21
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 2011
    Posts
    2,966

    Default

    Another vote for "this would only happen once", because said "guest" wouldn't be invited again.

    But then again - no. It wouldn't even happen the first time, because I have the balls to say NO to self-invited guests in the first place.



  2. #22
    Join Date
    Apr. 29, 2005
    Location
    State of Confusion
    Posts
    1,375

    Default

    Just dig in for your inner Southern Diva, smile your most saccharin smile, and reply (every time): "Why, bless your heart, thank you for caring". Then change topic or move on to another activity. Same response every single time she says anything that you don't want to respond to/tired of hearing. Don't be too snide, just nicely firm. She wants a response and if it were me, I'd refuse to give her one.

    Oldenmare
    A Practicing PhD in Southern Bitch
    Quote Originally Posted by SmartAlex View Post

    Give it up. Many of us CoTHers are trapped at a computer all day with no way out, and we hunt in packs. So far it as all been in good fun. You should be thankful for that.



  3. #23
    Join Date
    Jan. 10, 2002
    Location
    Area VIII, Region 2, Zone 5.
    Posts
    6,594

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by hank View Post
    I used to get all worked up about such silly things...now I wouldn't even hear such a comment, age will do that for you. It's your house and your life and your SO, comments from the penny ante section are not worth even a second of your attention. It's THEIR problem if they wish you had a bigger house. Don't take on other people's problems....
    You're right, but it's aggravating and there's every reason to want to put a stop to being aggravated in your own home by someone who has invited his or herself into it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Linny View Post
    Those martingales were so taut, you could play Ode to Joy on them with a comb



  4. #24
    Join Date
    Dec. 19, 2000
    Location
    Heaven - Rappahannock County, Virginia
    Posts
    1,828

    Default

    Has my mother been to visit you?

    Seriously, I've had to just lose it on her a couple of times and that usually works for a while. Some folks just don't get it, and they never will. Hold your ground.
    * trying hard to be the person that my horses think i am



  5. #25
    Join Date
    Aug. 8, 2001
    Location
    up the hill from the little river (that floods alarmingly often)
    Posts
    3,607

    Default

    What oldenmare said. This situation is perfect for the syrupy-sweet "Well, bless your heart!"
    Full-time bargain hunter.



  6. #26
    Join Date
    Mar. 14, 2010
    Location
    Earlysville, Virginia
    Posts
    3,244

    Default

    Um wow. Rude. I wouldn't invite them back.

    I'm huge on hospitality, and I admit that I hate going to my in laws house because they 1. Don't have heat and 2. Only have one bathroom but those are MY problems and I would never say anything out loud. I certainly wouldn't expect them to change their home just because I visit a few times a year!
    Charlie Brown (1994 bay TB X gelding)
    White Star (2004 grey TB gelding)

    Mystical Moment, 1977-2010.



  7. #27
    Join Date
    Jul. 20, 1999
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    3,196

    Default

    How does someone invite themselves over without your permission?



  8. #28
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 2005
    Location
    Mass.
    Posts
    6,608

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by kathy s. View Post
    Yes. And the next time this person wants to visit you could suggest a nearby hotel since your house isn't large enough to accommodate them.
    Yup.

    That is insufferably rude. WWMMS? (What would Miss Manners say?) "I just feel terrible that the size of my home is such an inconvenience for you. Clearly you're very uncomfortable. Let me just call the Holiday Inn right now and tell them you'll be along shortly."
    Last edited by Guin; Mar. 19, 2012 at 09:04 PM. Reason: added snark
    I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care. ~ Dave Barry



  9. #29
    Join Date
    Sep. 5, 2005
    Location
    Mass.
    Posts
    6,608

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by twotrudoc View Post
    Stare directly at the person and say out loud "Why do you keep bringing up the size of my house?".
    You can either accept their answer or keep drilling them until they just apologize for being a donkey
    This is also a good idea.
    I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care. ~ Dave Barry



  10. #30
    Join Date
    Sep. 30, 2007
    Posts
    2,715

    Default

    Additional tactics.

    "I didn't hear you can you please say that again?" "I'm sorry I still didn't hear what you saying, can you please say it again?" Keep repeating over and over and they might shut the f*( up.

    "Yes of course you are right. A great big A hole such as yourself naturally needs more space."

    "I completely agree with you but we are a little short of funds at present. It would be quite helpful if you could provide us with a monthly payment to help speed up the process, $20,000 per month would be a good start. I'll expect you to have your payment to me by the 1st and will charge a $5,000 late fee if I have not received your payment by the 5th."

    "Our religious beliefs do not permit us to reside in anything larger than ----- (provide square feet of your dwelling).

    Good luck!



  11. #31
    Join Date
    Jan. 30, 2007
    Posts
    3,152

    Default

    We must have the same former friend! house was built in 1876, and it does have indoor plumbing and electricity and heat as modernizations - and the commment was that I could sell it and buy something nicer.
    WTF?! This house has personality and character way beyond what my former friend ever will, and I clearly told her I CHOSE this home! Why would I want something made out of chipboard and cut out with a cookie cutter? (which is an unfortunate description of her moder n home).
    Sounds like this person skipped basic manners class.
    Dee
    Founder of the I LOFF my worrywart TB clique!
    Official member of the "I Sing Silly Songs to My Animals!" Clique
    http://wilddiamondintherough.blogspot.ca/



  12. #32
    Join Date
    Feb. 23, 2005
    Location
    Spotsylvania, VA
    Posts
    12,832

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by oldenmare View Post
    Just dig in for your inner Southern Diva, smile your most saccharin smile, and reply (every time): "Why, bless your heart, thank you for caring". Then change topic or move on to another activity. Same response every single time she says anything that you don't want to respond to/tired of hearing. Don't be too snide, just nicely firm. She wants a response and if it were me, I'd refuse to give her one.

    Oldenmare
    A Practicing PhD in Southern Bitch
    Or my favorite "Well bless your heart, why EVER would you ask something like that?"
    I wasn't always a Smurf
    Penmerryl's Sophie RIDSH
    "I ain't as good as I once was but I'm as good once as I ever was"
    The ignore list is my friend. It takes 2 to argue.



  13. #33
    Join Date
    Jan. 25, 2009
    Posts
    254

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SillyHorse View Post
    You're right, but it's aggravating and there's every reason to want to put a stop to being aggravated in your own home by someone who has invited his or herself into it.
    Of course it's aggravating...It's meant
    to be aggravating...and if you pay any attention to it, soon the car will not be new enough, the furniture will be too dingy, the children will be too short/blonde/underdressed/etc. Ask me how I know.....

    The advice to the OP remains the same. If it is SO's family, you are stuck with the problem and the less energy you give it the better for all concerned. Selective hearing is your friend. Or you could just deck the idjit and be done with it

    A rational adult understands that not liking your house is their problem, as AliCat said above....and an adult with manners will keep quiet. As it is, the in law in question is working from an adolescent mindset and believes that their problems are up for the whole world to set right. Would you pay any attention to a 13 year old that sneered "Your house is too smalllllll....."?



  14. #34
    Join Date
    Feb. 20, 2010
    Location
    All 'round Canadia
    Posts
    4,668

    Default

    Are they trying to move into your house or something?



  15. #35
    Join Date
    Aug. 8, 2007
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    1,230

    Default

    "I wish you had a bigger house"....


    "well, I'm taking donations"



  16. #36
    Join Date
    Nov. 2, 2001
    Location
    Packing my bags
    Posts
    31,025

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by PiaffePlease View Post
    "I wish you had a bigger house"....


    "well, I'm taking donations"
    Yep, that's the one!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mozart View Post
    Personally, I think the moderate use of shock collars in training humans should be allowed.



  17. #37
    Join Date
    Jun. 25, 2004
    Location
    Carolinas
    Posts
    4,618

    Default

    CTS, Consider The Source.

    Then ask yourself two questions
    Is this person happy in their own life, if no then they are sharing their unhappiness with you and you can chose to not accept
    If yes, then maybe it is a poor attempt in wishing "better" for you.

    Are you and DH happy in you current home?
    If yes then be very clear with "guest" that your home is perfect for you two and you wish everyone else were as happy.
    If no, then DH may have told "guest" that he wants a different home and "guest" is overstepping bounds by trying to open the conversation.
    "Never do anything that you have to explain twice to the paramedics."
    Courtesy my cousin Tim



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