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  1. #1
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    Jan. 17, 2008
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    Default Instincts-Do you listen to yours?

    Did you ever have one of those "instinctive" feelings about something or someone, only to disregard it and find out you were right?

    As someone with pretty bad (medicated) anixiety, it's often hard to differentiate between my gut and panic. As of late, it seems that when something "ain't right" I shelf it and wait.

    Turns out I was right (for those following my boarding saga...).
    Anyone else have strong instincts? People radars? My people radar is ridiculously aggressive. It takes me about 30 seconds to read someone.

    Do share!
    mykidshavefourlegs.blogspot.com



  2. #2
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    Nov. 4, 2003
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    Dallas, Georgia
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    Yup. I have good radar and heed its warnings when it goes off. I'm very rarely wrong.
    <>< Sorrow Looks Back. Worry Looks Around. Faith Looks Up! -- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.



  3. #3
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    Mar. 5, 2007
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    Pontiac, MI
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    Default

    I try to listen to mine, but I also form very strong, very snap judgments about people based on limited interaction, so I also try to keep that in check and take it with a grain of salt. I will say that I've very rarely been wrong about people who REALLY rub me the wrong way - although I often learn the hard way



  4. #4
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    Dec. 4, 2007
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    Ontario
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    I usually regret it if I don't pay close attention and hede the warning.
    Riding the winds of change

    Heeling NRG Aussies
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  5. #5
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    Aug. 17, 2010
    Location
    East of the Sun, West of the Moon
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    155

    Default

    I hear mine, but don't think I listen enough. I try to keep an open mind and reprimand myself for being judgmental. The best I can do is keep my mouth shut and just come off aloof.
    Tu deviens responsable pour toujours de ce que tu as apprivoisé.
    You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed
    Le Petit Prince



  6. #6
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    Jan. 17, 2008
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    New England
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    Word around the way is that my new BO, where I am moving TOMORROW, is nuts. Not psychopathic, just loopy. Horses are fat and healthy.
    I've known the BO for a couple years, casually. Never ever had my bells go off. She's eccentric for sure. But I liked her right off the get go.
    Someone at old barn made a weird comment the other day and I asked old BO, who told me that the boarder thought new BO was "batshit crazy".

    My bells are quietly sleeping. I'm not concerned in the slightest.
    mykidshavefourlegs.blogspot.com



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul. 21, 2006
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    South Carolina
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LittleblackMorgan View Post
    Did you ever have one of those "instinctive" feelings about something or someone, only to disregard it and find out you were right?

    As someone with pretty bad (medicated) anixiety, it's often hard to differentiate between my gut and panic. As of late, it seems that when something "ain't right" I shelf it and wait.
    I think you are wise to do that. Often anxiety can cause us to limit our contacts and experiences to a crippling extent.

    Sure, if it's a matter of crossing the street or taking another elevator to avoid contact with a stranger who doesn't seem quite right - why not? If you're wrong, you've done no harm. But if we're talking about decisions like where to board a horse; whether or not to enroll in that clinic; whether to go on that ride or stay in the house and watch TV - then often that "little voice" needs to be stilled so we can get on with life.



  8. #8
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    Jun. 24, 2005
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    Alabama
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    In Gavin DeBecker's The Gift of Fear he discusses this, and says we should listen to the little voice warning us of danger, and I try to remember that about physical security at least. I try not to be ridiculous about listening to the instincts that tell me there is danger, but I also try not to take them for granted either. I think someone can go so far overboard that they make themselves terrified to do anything. But when someone takes reasonable precautions, but still lives their life it can be fine.

    LBM-If your own instincts say the eccentric BO is OK, then you are listening to your own opinion and not the opinions of others that could very well dislike this woman without knowing her at all. I've met people over the years that were actual targets of bullies or other people that had no reason to dislike the other person, and that's just wrong.
    You can't fix stupid-Ron White



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep. 1, 2007
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Foxtrot View Post
    I hear mine, but don't think I listen enough. I try to keep an open mind and reprimand myself for being judgmental. The best I can do is keep my mouth shut and just come off aloof.
    Me exactly.



  10. #10
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    Oct. 15, 2011
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    I try to follow my instincts but sometimes I don't. More often than not if I don't follow my instincts, I later regret it.
    *Wendy* 4.17.73 - 12.20.05



  11. #11
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    Mar. 1, 2003
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    Happily in Canada
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    Most of the times that I have not heeded my instincts, I have come to regret it later. Now I try to mingle being rational with listening to my gut - it works for me.
    Blugal

    You never know what kind of obsessive compulsive crazy person you are until another person imitates your behaviour at a three-day. --Gry2Yng



  12. #12
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    Oct. 1, 2002
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    Cow County, MD
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    I've learned to obey mine. I don't think it's any paranormal ability or sixth sense, but that some corner of my consciousness is picking up on signals that aren't screamingly apparent.

    The little hairs on the back of your neck will never lie to you. I had a new colleague at work a couple years ago who set my neck hairs completely on end. They were right. Within weeks, he had made the rounds of all the women of color in the office trying to hit on them. Then he started with me. He'd come in my office and stand over me, sit next to me in meetings and casually drape himself so that he was in my space, call/visit/email me several times a day. I filed an EEO complaint against him after my boss failed to rein him in.

    He left for a different job once he saw the handwriting on the wall and within five month at the new job (on a college campus) he'd been fired and placed on the persona non grata list.

    I later found out that he had written a book--it's on the 99 cent list for downloadable books at Amazon. The main character is a reporter by day and mercenary by night who murders people that are molesters. The character makes statements about how he does whatever is necessary to punish those who deserve it. Scary, scary stuff.

    I google him every few months to make sure I know where he is.
    Life would be infinitely better if pinatas suddenly appeared throughout the day.



  13. #13
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    Sep. 1, 2007
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    NJ
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    I listen to them now! I have always learned to regret it if I don't.

    It's hard because sometimes I think I'm just overreacting so I try to balance that out. If the feeling is super strong...I listen to it 100%



  14. #14
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    Nov. 26, 2010
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    175

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    I'm another one with rather intense "people radar". It doesn't take me long to figure someone out - and 99% of the time I'm right.

    I'm also of the "I can tell when you're lying" camp.

    Other than that I don't really pay much attention. I lean towards low anxiety, too.



  15. #15
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    Nov. 8, 2005
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    NC
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    I'm pretty intuitive (Myers-Briggs INTJ with the I and T maxxed out) and was told not so long ago that I'm the most intuitive person another ever had met in the sense that I have a pretty accurate sense of what will happen down the road. That's probably a mixture of intuition and trying to extract predictive information from a limited data set, and definitely not to my mind mystical 'precognition' which is the way some people use the term.

    For me as far as 'warnings' or 'bad feelings', it depends upon my state of mind, but in general when everything is going along evenly, if something happens that suddenly feels 'wrong' involving a person or a situation, I pay heed to the warning at least to the extent that I examine the situation more closely. I don't change plans or make major decisions based on an unexamined intuition, though.

    'Hunches' about things or situations for which there's no real information (rather than partial or new information) or that are decided randomly aren't so much intuition as random noise. (E.g., the winning lottery number picks.) Those I typically ignore to no bad effect.

    If you have neither partial information nor anything new, then all you have left to use is purely emotional and the result will be garbage, like thinking you see an image on a snowy TV screen when you know there is no signal because the antenna is disconnected.

    I think paying attention to your intuition works more reliably the more life experience you gain. I know it was useless until I was into my 20's probably because I didn't have enough life experience to process much of anything reliably. At about 40 it became pretty trustworthy and after seeing that, I began to weight it more because of that.

    In retrospect looking back to my late 20's, most of the times I brushed off something involving people or situations that didn't seem to fit or flashed a warning, proved later on to have been a bad mistake, kind of like turning a blind eye to unwelcome news or being in denial.

    One bit of advice I learned from a psychiatrist friend, however, is not to allow an intuition by itself to paralyze you from taking action.

    Of course if the information you have to work with is misleading or bad information, whatever you make or don't make of it will follow the garbage-in garbage-out rule.
    If I knew what I were doing, why would I take lessons?

    "Things should be as simple as possible,
    but no simpler." - Einstein



  16. #16
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    Nov. 8, 2005
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Alter-ed View Post
    I'm also of the "I can tell when you're lying" camp.
    I think that works fine when the person telling the lie has a conscience because they have subtle reactions to what they're saying when they know it not to be true. Picking up on those, even if you can't quite describe what you're picking up on, will work.

    If you're dealing with a psychopath who pretty much by definition has no conscience, that person won't react the same way, so no tell-tales. With that kind of person your only hope is to detect some inconsistency that can't be plausibly explained.

    The one clinker in all this is that some people who are in fact being truthful may feel uneasy about whatever they are saying and 'act guilty' even when they are not. I raise that point because when I was a little kind I would sometimes act guilty just based on being accused of something, even when in fact I was not.

    My habit of being unable to out-and-out lie about anything, and knowing that if I did I would be easily detected because I have no experience lying, has created some of the thorniest problems in my life. I also am distinctly uneasy about misdirection and 'half-truths' (i.e., true statements that omit something important and therefore are deceptive) -- which fall short of outright lies -- more and more the older I get.
    If I knew what I were doing, why would I take lessons?

    "Things should be as simple as possible,
    but no simpler." - Einstein



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