The Chronicle of the Horse
MagazineNewsHorse SportsHorse CareCOTH StoreVoicesThe Chronicle UntackedDirectoriesMarketplaceDates & Results
 
Results 1 to 19 of 19
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct. 5, 2008
    Posts
    106

    Default Parents and gratitude?

    So here's the deal-
    To sum it up in a sentence, in case people do not want to read this entire post: I am a junior rider, I have really awesome parents, and I want to find a way to really express my gratitude to them.

    My parents have been extremely supportive of my riding. I show in the big eq and the junior jumpers, and I'm hoping to be competitive at Medal and Maclay finals this year and Young Riders next year. That info is relevant just because it means that I've shown a lot, I've been gone a lot, and my parents have given up a LOT of weekends and free time to take me to shows and to the barn. Horses are expensive (as we all, unfortunately, know), and they have done their best to have me as well-mounted as possible. They made it possible for me to ride with a trainer who is 2.5 hours away. This is my last junior year, and they have given me the opportunity to ride and own some EXTREMELY nice horses for it. They can't always make it to shows because I have 2 other siblings and they have their own lives, but they never miss leaving me a phone call or voice message before a big class, even if they have to get up at 6AM to do it because the class starts at 7. Outside of the horse world, they have been excellent mentors, OUTSTANDING role models in terms of ethics, behavior, work ethic, and kindness/treatment of others, they have been shoulders to cry on during my hardest times and hands to high-five during my best ones. Some of my funniest memories and biggest laughs are with my parents. They are supportive and caring. When things are really difficult, my mom is nearly always the first one I call. When I need life advice about something that feels huge at the time, I usually ask my dad first. I see that some of my friends do not have positive relationships and are not close with their parents, and I am very glad that I am so close to mine. In short, my parents have been extremely supportive of me and I feel so, so, SO lucky to have them in my life. I want to find a way to express that.
    Of course I thank them regularly for what they do for me, and I celebrate birthdays, mother's day, and father's day with gifts and cards. I just want to express how grateful I am to them. It doesn't need to be a huge material gift, although I suppose it could be that- I more want a way to let them know my feelings.

    So, on that note,
    Parents, what would you appreciate from your children? I'm certainly hoping to be creative on my own and I'm not looking for someone to tell me exactly what to do so that I do not have to think for myself- don't get me wrong. I would, however, love some suggestions as to how COTH people (whether you are a parent or not) like gratitude expressed to them.

    Thank you COTH!
    Last edited by pinwheel; Aug. 15, 2011 at 03:38 AM.



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan. 26, 2010
    Posts
    6,230

    Default

    Show them this.

    YOU become a mentor for other kids, and do it in their name. Pay it forward. That is the best gift you can give. You do not realize how many people have no idea what you're talking about in the way of family. Go and teach the world--use your family as the example.



  3. #3
    Join Date
    May. 8, 2004
    Location
    PA
    Posts
    6,819

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by pinwheel View Post
    So, on that note,
    Parents, what would you appreciate from your children? I'm certainly hoping to be creative on my own and I'm not looking for someone to tell me exactly what to do so that I do not have to think for myself- don't get me wrong. I would, however, love some suggestions as to how COTH people (whether you are a parent or not) like gratitude expressed to them.

    Thank you COTH!
    By becoming a responsible, independent adult. Get a job, pay your bills and have a great life. Good luck! Sounds like you have a good start.



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug. 17, 2004
    Location
    Rixeyville, VA
    Posts
    6,685

    Default

    Write them a letter by hand and tell them what you just told us. It will mean more to them than anything else you could give them.
    Where Norwegian Fjords Rule
    http://www.ironwood-farm.com



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul. 31, 2007
    Posts
    15,465

    Default

    Oh, yes, "Pay it forward" and give credit to your parents (and others) as you do that. That's like an on-going and valuable tribute to them. I'm sure they'd be pleased.
    The armchair saddler
    Politically Pro-Cat



  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct. 29, 2003
    Location
    Ocala, FL
    Posts
    1,925

    Default

    I agree - show them this! Kudos to you for realizing that your parents are extrodinary, and kudos to them for raising you to be a thoughtful young person. So many are not these days. My sweet neice has lost all sense of perspective and is throwing her future away. She is a beautiful, smart former honors student who almost failed her junior year of high school and has gotten in trouble with the law now multiple times. So sad to see this girl who has everything get caught up in trasht drama with "friends" and materialistic obsessions...

    Best of luck to you, and, if you can, maybe plan a formal dinner and present them each with a letter expressing your gratitude. If you cook, good chance to show that off!



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr. 22, 2008
    Posts
    804

    Default

    Write them a letter now, be a fantastic human being and role model/mentor throughout your adulthood, and support them in their old age. (Not just financial support, but things like helping them around the house, going with them to doctor's appointments, making sure they live full and happy lives and don't get socially isolated.) I have a feeling you will do very well



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb. 23, 2005
    Location
    Spotsylvania, VA
    Posts
    13,579

    Default A few years ago I recieved this from my younger daughter

    Quote Originally Posted by pinwheel View Post
    So, on that note,
    Parents, what would you appreciate from your children? I'm certainly hoping to be creative on my own and I'm not looking for someone to tell me exactly what to do so that I do not have to think for myself- don't get me wrong. I would, however, love some suggestions as to how COTH people (whether you are a parent or not) like gratitude expressed to them.

    Thank you COTH!
    Today is my first Mother's Day, and several people have asked me how I would like to celebrate it. Honestly the only thing I want today is to know that I'm not messing everything up, so I thought maybe in turn, I would tell you that I'm glad I have a mother like you. I've always had a hard time expressing sentimental emotions, especially to you and dad. I thought you should know, that I know, that you have influenced every aspect of my life. Everything that I am is because of you, and I am thankful for that.

    It meant more to me than any gift
    I wasn't always a Smurf
    Penmerryl's Sophie RIDSH
    "I ain't as good as I once was but I'm as good once as I ever was"
    The ignore list is my friend. It takes 2 to argue.



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec. 4, 2007
    Location
    Ontario
    Posts
    1,953

    Default

    Show them what you've written here
    Riding the winds of change

    Heeling NRG Aussies
    Like us on facebook!



  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul. 4, 2000
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Or if you want something more 'display-able', have a really nice professional portrait done of you and your horse (with or without ribbons / trophies, your choice). Type or write out your letter as suggested above, then have both the photo and the letter mounted and framed together. Present the final framed item on a significant date: their anniversary, your birthday, Christmas, whatever feels appropriate for your family.

    *Star*
    "Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit."
    - Desiderata, (c) Max Ehrman, 1926



  11. #11
    Join Date
    Oct. 26, 2005
    Location
    Deep South
    Posts
    4,601

    Default

    Words from our children whether written or spoken are the most precious gifts we can ever receive. To be told I am appreciated and that my sacreifices are recognized makes every struggle worth it. I have one child who expresses it almost daily, now that she is a mother. My other child is less emotional and more reserved with her feelings. I'm hoping one day she will be able to say what I know she feels.
    SPAY/NEUTER/RESCUE/ADOPT!
    Little Star Chihuahua Rescue
    The Barkalicious Bakery
    On Facebook!!!



  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jul. 7, 2011
    Posts
    147

    Default

    I think if you show them this they will burst out crying....I almost did. I think this is so wondeful and so wonderfully written. I know my daughter feels the same way as you do but to have her write it would mean the world to me. You sound like a great girl and your parents must be so proud of you. Thank you for caring so much about what your parents have done for you.



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Oct. 5, 2008
    Posts
    106

    Default

    Thank you all for the sweet suggestions. I think perhaps I will write each of them a letter telling them how wonderful they are and how lucky I feel to have them. I will add in a nice family photo of all of us (maybe even including horses, if I can get it as well).
    Thanks for the nice words and for giving me the (very helpful) perspectives of adults and parents. I want them to feel appreciated for everything they do.Any other suggestions are still welcome too, of course.



  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jan. 27, 2004
    Location
    Yonder, USA
    Posts
    2,561

    Default

    I love the framed letter and picture idea. That's the sort of thing they can look at decades from now, or show someone when they're bragging on their awesome kid. I suspect that reading your note or something similar on video for them would also be something they'd treasure. You're going to grow up and get 'old', so media that captures the way you look and act 'now' along with your wonderful message is doubley precious.
    ---------------------------



  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar. 10, 2009
    Posts
    5,623

    Default

    Wow. This thread is a shining example of parents who have done a wonderful job of raising their kids.

    OP, show them this thread. And to "pinwheel's" parents: congratulations. You've got a remarkable young lady for a daughter.



  16. #16
    Join Date
    Mar. 1, 2003
    Location
    Happily in Canada
    Posts
    5,000

    Default

    My parents like us to spend time with them. Now that we are in our 20s we don't see each other as often, and there is nothing they like more than one or all of us planning a family day or weekend together.
    Blugal

    You never know what kind of obsessive compulsive crazy person you are until another person imitates your behaviour at a three-day. --Gry2Yng



  17. #17
    Join Date
    Oct. 5, 2008
    Posts
    106

    Default

    Thank you all. Very much appreciated. The video idea is a cool one too- perhaps I'll look into making a vid as well.
    Mara, thank you for your kind words.



  18. #18
    Join Date
    Oct. 5, 2008
    Posts
    106

    Default

    Just wanted to follow up and let you guys know that I used your suggestions/ thank everyone again for your suggestions! My mom's birthday was a few days ago, so I presented everything to my parents then. I wound up taking your suggestions- I made a video with pictures of us through the years and recorded myself talking to them and I wrote them each a letter. I think (hope) they loved it- they told me they were very touched and my mom got a little teary-eyed.
    Thanks again COTH!



  19. #19
    Join Date
    Feb. 4, 2005
    Location
    San Antonio, TX, or thereabouts
    Posts
    691

    Default

    pinwheel, that's pretty much awesome.

    I wrote my dad a letter like that -- we have a great relationship, so was entirely true! -- and it was a very moving thing for him.

    You'll never regret thanking and speaking kind and loving words to special people in your life.
    "And now," cried Max, "let the wild rumpus start!"



Similar Threads

  1. A little gratitude, please!!!
    By shygirl in forum Off Course
    Replies: 66
    Last Post: Apr. 26, 2012, 04:40 PM
  2. New parents that don't get it.
    By Hunter Mom in forum Hunter/Jumper
    Replies: 134
    Last Post: May. 18, 2011, 07:14 PM
  3. The Holiday Gratitude Thread
    By Lori B in forum Off Course
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: Dec. 23, 2010, 11:54 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
randomness