I had just gotten done doing my internship riding for a tough trainer at Saratoga, and I was back at college trotting around on a 25 year old mare who is maaaaybe 15 hands during a lesson, and she jumped sideways at the train going by and I tumbled right off her shoulder. Forget crazy racehorses, beware the ancient quarter horse mares!
I took of my stirrup leathers on New Year's Day and hung them in the tack room. I spent all of January and February either riding with no stirrups or bareback. The first week of March, it was time to back outside, so I got my leathers, and hung them back on my saddle. Well, apparently I forgot how they worked. Somehow, in reinstalling them, I must have knocked the buckle tongue of the left leather out of the hole.
So, I lead my horse to the mounting block, put my weight in the left stirrup,
As my 40 year old brain struggled to make sense of what was happening, my stirrup leather sloooooowly released my stirrup, dumping me, unceremoniously, in a confused pile, between the mounting block and my horse, who stood over me, snorting, eyes rolling, as if to say "My goodness, it is awfully early in the day for you to be drunk isn't it?"
Why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?
~ Dave Barry
He had come over to my friend's farm (this was well before liability releases, etc.) Me, trying to be all cool and suave, decided I was going to ride my friend's 20 year old Walking Horse mare. It was Summer and too hot for a saddle (so I told myself.)
The mare, standing a nice 16.1 hands tall, was difficult for short me to mount so I walked her over to a pick up truck. She stood patiently beside the dropped tailgate. I climbed up, went to slide my leg over, and as soon as she felt someone mounting (as most gaited horses are trained to do I later found out) she moved off....................quickly.
I held on for a good four seconds, trying to pull myself over, but she was sweaty. I was sweaty. She was moving too fast, and I pushed off from her (knowing I was going to fall, and slowly sliding under hard-hitting hooves was not an option.) Luckily, I was good at falling (hey! I still am! I'm "graceful" like that) and only broke my pride.
Even better falling off story.
I had ridden as a kid (A LOT! by not lessons or anything - we couldn't afford them) when I could. Then we moved, and I hadn't been on a horse in ten years. I had been given the "okay" to return to activities, and getting on a horse was first.
As my friend gave me a leg up, I don't know what the heck happened, but I went up............and over...........and down the other side.
My favorite riding "incident" though doesn't involve falling off. It involves the dangers of a large-cupped bra and a western saddle.
I had removed my foot from both stirrups, swung over, leaned too far forward, and the underwire of my bra got stuck on the horn. Talk.about.embarrassing. I was praying no one saw me as I stayed VERY close to the horse, pretending like I was just really grateful for a good ride, and worked my bra off the saddle horn. Of course...........someone DID see me.
The dangers of Western saddles, indeed.
If wishes were horses then beggars would ride...
DLA: Draft Lovers Anonymous
Originally Posted by talkofthetown
As in, the majikal butterfly-fahting gypsy vanners.
Hydrophile... I had this happen... I about peed myself... was up on an old retired police horse for (my) first time...Said horse was already bouncing with antsiness...I went to dismount... bra caught on the horn OVER my shirt so I was completely wrapped in the horn... What's worse... my two best friend's: male and female.. were coming up from the house to see how things were going...The horrors of trying to get me undone without flashing anyone...
So my epic fail...::cough:: I mean FALL wasn't even ON horseback.
First nice day we had, I had taken my heart horse out for a spin, a long trail ride, had come back to the barn, untacked, cleaned stall.. and was taking him back out to his field. Well.. Long story short... my heart horse is pretty awesome.. and most of the time we do everything together.. without halter or lead rope. That and the gate to his pasture is like 100 feet from the barn.
So we're walking out.. I have a lead thrown over his back but I wasn't attached to it in any form.. and we're walking along and I'm talking and the next thing I know I am face first COMPLETELY horizontally on the ground.. and I look up... and poor heart horse has turned into a fire breathing/snorting dragon and is standing there with both front feet splayed out...nostrils flared... looking at me like "WTF just happened, I SWEAR I didn't do it Mom"...
Well.. as I was walking... on LEVEL ground I SWEAR....my ankle rolled. Now. For the record: My ankle rolls all the time. I've become a pro at recovery from an ankle roll. Apparently... this one snuck up on me.... No warning, No Preparation, not even a chance to bend at the knee and lessen the blow......
Did I mention that the ground was still FREEZING? So... not only was this ankle roll a doozy..I also body planted with nothing to break my fall onto cold hard dirt...I had bruises 2 feet long from my thighs over my knees down my shins.
And poor heart horse could not wrap his head around what happened to me... and wasn't convinced he wasn't in the dog house.
While I just wanted to lay there (and I did,), I had to get up and comfort the poor frightened beast. And when I rolled over to get up, and started cracking up laughing at what the hell had just taken place...
It did not convince poor fire breathing dragon/heart of gold heart horse, that the situation was anymore safer lol.
I got up, loved him (he did not run, just splayed and snorted lol) and calmed him down and assured him I was just fine. I put him in his field, gave him a mint (and usually he's barreling off before I even close the gate) but this time... he just sat there and gave me this look like "Mom...are you suuuuureeee you are Ok?"
"Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."
My senior year of college, I begged and begged to be allowed to "borrow" my favorite horse from the beginner program to show at our hunter trials.
We were warming up, and my trainer directed us to hop over a *teeny* jump constructed from two stacked cavalletti. We proceeded to jump from a somewhat deep spot in an uncoordinated fashion... and this particular horse had learned that if his rider buried him, it was much less effort to just plow through the jump than to make the effort to pick his feet up.
Stacked cavelletti do not fall down quite as well as rails in cups.
Out little chip turned into an awkward stumble-and-almost-wipe out. I landed hard in my left stirrup, my horse stumbled on landing, and I sort of... half-stepped, half-vaulted off of him. And landed not-so-gracefully on my hind end.
My friend, who was at the other end of the gigantic indoor, proceeded to shout, "THAT WAS PATHETIC!"
I'm not sure it's my most embarrassing ever, but it's definitely the most recently embarrassing...
I got a new paint last spring that was green as grass. Everything was new and everything new required at least one spook. We were at the arena for our weekly lesson and since it was the first time in the outside arena, I headed out to warm up before my lesson started since I knew he'd need to blow off some nervous energy before he could focus.
So yeah, we're trotting around and my trainer's dad and husband are working on the little viewing platform. We've been by them about 6 times and they haven't been scary at all until, well, they were. He spooks, I wrap my legs around him, he does a bit of crowhopping, I stay on, we get stopped. And just as I'm breathing in relief and self-congratulation he gives one more tiny little itty bitty hop, and I tumble off over his neck, landing flat on my back with him looking at me in shock.
I jump up, quickly dust the sand off, and jump back on so that my trainer won't know that I came off. Her dad asks if I'm okay and I say, yep, don't tell K.
I might have gotten away with it if not for all the sand on my baseball cap... She still laughs at me for thinking I could hide my little tumble.
Reviving this old thread because I'm new at this barn.
My most embarrassing time(s) was when I first got my first horse. I went out early on a Sunday morning to ride around the block. My husband stayed home with the kids. I told him where I was going and that if I wasn't back in 2 hours to come looking for me. And not in the middle of the road...I'll be in a ditch.
I was a complete newbie to riding and horses otherwise I'd been bright enough to not go out by myself like that. At one point in our ride, I came to "the sod field" which had a log across the entrance; to keep vehicles out. We ALWAYS (the group I rode with) would have our horses walk over that log and again back out. So I had Cherokee walk over it...good girl...and then coming back I gave her LOTS of rein so she could look. I leaned over her shoulder so I could look and what do I see? Two knees coming up together. Uh-oh...jumping in a English saddle when you don't know how to ride. I landed flat on my back...tuck and roll...knocking the wind out of me. She waited patiently while I decided I hadn't died. I stood on the log to get back on and we went back out on the road. About 200 feet further along, a mouse rustled in the leaves and she spooked sideways, dumping me on my dupa in the middle of the road. I was NOT going to be seen leading my horse with black dirt from the sod field all over my back and brown dirt from the road covering my butt so I led her back to the log, got on and rode home on a VERY TIGHT REIN with hunks on mane in my fist. Hubby was just coming out to go look for me. After he saw the dirt, he said "You weren't kidding were you".
It was at the very first stables that I rode. My absolute favorite pony was a welsh/arabian cross who loved to spook at just about anything he could think of. As long as he was kept busy jumping he was great but on the flat, well lets just say I learned very quickly how to fall/emergency dismount without an issue.
This particular moment occurred after a heavy rainstorm that left him in his stall for a few days. All he wanted to do was canter. All I wanted to do was trot the line so we could canter in the corner.
All of a sudden he throws in about four bucks along the fence line, something he never did before! I shouted the whole time "Get your head up!" Each word going with a buck! I manage to stay on with the bucking but as soon as he settles and we pick up a walk he tossed his head (yanking on me) and I went sliding off like jelly!
So here I am sitting in wet sand glaring at this (now saintly horse) with everyone trying not to laugh and him looking at me going "Why are you there?" XD I laughed about it and got back on but still... was beat red as it was in front of half the barn!
I had the nickname "velcro" as a teenager because I stuck everything. A nasty bucker or stopper was nothing for my sticky behind. I'm at my second lesson with a new trainer, I'm out of shape and exhausted by this point. I'm trotting down a hill in two point just catching my breath and trainers dog runs out from under a jump. My mare spooks a little bit, nothing bad, and right over her shoulder I go. She was terrified, took off. Poor baby that was with us was probably scarred for life. I felt like a complete idiot. No injuries, horse stood totally still until I walked all the way to the other end of the field to catch her. I got back on and jumped a few more jumps and called it a day.
I've come off so many times I had a hard time picking the MOST embarassing. I remember one time we were riding in the field next door. Someone had cut a meandering path thru it with a sycle bar...we were riding on that path. I look up just in time to see our patio door slide open and our beagle mix come running out. "Oh sh*t, who let the dam dog out?"
We stopped and stood still as she came running thru the field, popping up here and there to see where we were. Her final pop was right next to me. Remember I was standing still. It was like slow motion...my mare left me. The saddle horn went out of reach, then the cantle slid out from under me leaving me sitting on her butt; which was also leaving. I kicked of my remaining stirrup and went splat on the mowed stubble behind her.
I mean really: we were standing still and I STILL got dumped.
January 1st one year, a friend and I were bundled up & gung ho to go for a New Years bareback trail ride in the lovely fresh snow, despite it having been an, erm, long night the night before.
I overshot my hop to mount up by more than a little and rolled gracefully right off the other side, around the belly and slow-moed my way underneath my poor gelding. That sainted horse put his nose between his front legs and gave me a long "Just stay down there, you idjit." glare. Dear friend got laughing so hard that she about rolled off as well. I am eternally grateful that this was in the pre-smartphone days or I would be a youtube sensation.
I love all these stories - in the vein of "it takes 3 falls to make a rider" we are all GP here.
My most embarassing is also my most recent, the day I went out to test ride a horse I was looking to purchase. The horse was a former steeplechaser, but he's 13 now, and had been owned by a kid who hadn't really done much with him for the past few years but hack out around their farm.
He handles "fairly well" on the flat, which means we was not nearly as nuts as some of the ridiculous greenies I was dealing with at the lesson barn. Lovely smooth canter, so I decide to try a few jumps. Being responsible, I start low to warm him up, maybe an 18" crossrail. Being incredibly lazy and stupid, I am paying no mind to my own form or balance. Sweet thing trots right up to the X.... and takes it like a 4' oxer.
I go flying, likely terrifying the current owner, and the horse (incredibly herd sour at the time) goes running off towards the barn. I stood up, dusted myself off, watched the horse canter slowly and with good extension back towards the barn. I bought him the next day.
At a show of course. It was hot, like 97 degrees and 80% humidity. Just horrible. My mare decided enough was enough and did a nasty spin, dip, buck and dumped me unceremoniously in the dirt. I rolled onto my face and tried to dig myself a deeper hole to hide my shame. Meanwhile, my mare did a victory gallop around the ring with her tail flagged out like The Black Stallion.
My personal best - well, there are too many to count. Probably my messiest was mare stuttered over a cavelleti and dumped me. In ankle deep mud. At a show. At our barn.
My personal favorite, however, was a friend riding a green pony in the hack at a schooling show. Class as over. When they pinned it and Pony won the class, he spooked at teh ribbon, jumped sideways and dumped her. She got dumped in the lineup of a flat. Hehehe.
Around my 2nd year as an adult re-rider I went through a phase for a few months where I'd fall TWICE in every weekly group lesson! A few might have been the horse's fault - but most of them were just 'what the hell happened there' falls. It got to the point where trainer would help me up off the ground and say "Ok, that's the first one out of the way"
I remember one incident where I was riding a freight train of a horse through a course who was just flat out running away with me. Trainer was in the middle of the ring and I thought we were going to run her down... so started to steer horse to the right - right where the 4' gate was sitting. (I was barely jumping 2'9" at the time). Trainer yell, I look up, see gate, crank horse harder to the right - horse goes over sideways there I was, lying at the foot of the jump standard, and telling my trainer "I can't believe I'm paying you for this." She just shrugs and says "You know, I was perfectly capable of getting out of the way'.
15 years later, I still haven't lived that one down.