only wish I had one to add, but wanted you guys to know: daughter is home sick....and I've been reading these and calling them out across the hall while we both squirt tears laughing. Its been a fun pick me up. THANKS!
(I think for me the funniest was the gorilla gelding...already deformed)
"Indecision may or may not be my problem"
Need to save this one for posterity! Just in case someone has a spectacularly trained rhino...
In need of a boring riding horse - $300 (Las Vegas)
I have just unloaded a "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" of a horse, but need a calm, gentle horse to ride through my neighborhood when I pony my colt.
Calm/Gentle/Boring does NOT mean:
30 years old, dead, swaybacked, untrained, 3 legs, has navicular, blind, deaf, or it's really a burro.
It DOES mean:
Prefer a gelding, between 10 and 15. Safe. Has been ridden through residential neighborhoods and not tossed you, bolted, reared, bucked, left you at a stop sign, left you stranded, took you 3 neighborhoods over, or has to be ridden in a full Pelham because "whoa" is not in its vocabulary.
Price negotiable--I put $300 but for the right horse it's all negotiable.
Please send pictures of the ACTUAL horse (not a "looks just like this!"), his or her age to the best of your knowledge (13 should not mean "actually 20"), and I'd love a pic of someone ON the horse.
I'm 5'5, so larger than a pony. Mules OK. Spectacularly trained, rideable camel/llama/rhino possibly accepted. Gelding or mare, don't care about color or how ugly it is. Don't care about breed.
"Rare Buckskin Amer. Saddlebred Stallion (Gretna)
Absolutely beautiful buckskin Purebred American Saddlebred Stallion, age 10. Top Champion Sultan's Sultana/Champagne Fizz bloodlines, but does not sell with registration papers, as he is too line bred to breed safely to an ASB. His rare champagne ivory/isabella palomino sire is on premises.
This amazingly photogenic, stunning stallion has had 8 months of professional ground work training done by a local, now retired Arabian breeder. He has unbelievable, fluid action and ballerina-like athleticism. Comes when he is called like a dog. He is an EZ keeper, has good feet and never needed to be shod
This stallion does NOT relate well to men, as he was severely abused by the psychotic drunken husband of his breeder, who beat him. He responds well to an experienced female stallion handler, and is easy to work around and handle. Does not kick, bite, strike, or rear, is a big baby and not mean in any way. He responds with affection to a caring, knowing handler, but he does not trust men.
The American Saddlebred is a very high-strung breed, due to so much inbreeding from a small gene pool. This stallion is no exception, and if handled with care and love and he will be the greatest horse, for the right buyer, anyone could hope to find.
Only those with knowledge of the American Saddlebred's unique sensitivity and temperament need respond, as this rare and unique breed is not for anyone who is not Saddlebred savvy, if breaking him to saddle is the plan.
You do not "cowboy" this breed.
This stallion has strictly been a beautiful pasture ornament, for the 7 years seller has owned him.
100% sound with no vices. UTD on worming and vaccinations.
The right home for this phenomenally beautiful stallion is of paramount importance. Seller is very particular where this horse goes, and prefers him to have the freedom to run free in a good-sized pasture, with good grass, in a run-in situation, in a forever home, owned by a special owner who is looking for more than just a beautiful buckskin to call her own, but is looking for a serious, meaningful relationship with a truly unique and sensitive horse, so beautiful it takes your breath away. .
Photos will be taken and posted soon. "
"In the beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people angry and has widely been considered as a bad move." -Douglas Adams
I have a feeling I know who that seller is, and if it's her, she does really need to sell him. And from speaking to her about it last weekend, it seems the horse does need a certain person. This is me speaking from a "rescue the PITA horses who other people have screwed the F*** up" POV.
~ Shannon ~
"My doctrine is this, that if we see cruelty or wrong that we have the power to stop, and do nothing, we make ourselves sharers in the guilt.” ― Anna Sewell, Black Beauty
I have an 11 year old quarter horse for sale she is to big and my fast for my 10 year old daughter . She needs an experenced rider she is current on her cloggings have vet papers... she loads and ties she will makr a good trail horse has been used to work cattle... i will concider trade on an older or child safe horse you can e-mail me your number
Hmmm, wonder where I can sign my mare up for Clogging lessons?
I'd rather sell the poster of the ad some spelling lessons... Might even take the mare in on a trade.