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  1. #41
    Join Date
    Jul. 10, 2001
    Posts
    6,706

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    Quote Originally Posted by fordtraktor View Post
    Your problem is lack of exposure. More tophat.

    You should learn to promote yourself more effectively, perhaps through a webpage like this: http://www.heathertonshowhuntersjumpers.com/


    I get plenty of exposure. I have sponsors always asking for pictures and giving me money. If you don't believe me, Here is a picture of my self-trained 3 year-old dutch warmblood at Coconino II in 2010.

    http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=...ed=0CDkQ9QEwBg



  2. #42
    Join Date
    Jan. 14, 2006
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    4,018

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    Quote Originally Posted by RAyers View Post
    I get plenty of exposure. I have sponsors always asking for pictures and giving me money. If you don't believe me, Here is a picture of us at Coconino II in 2010.

    http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=...ed=0CDkQ9QEwBg
    I don't know what you're trying to prove by being full figured, Reed. Sponsors think fluffy girls are hideous and are single handedly trying to destroy the sport of eventing because we had two people on the WEG team who aren't stick figures.

    Don't you know that anyone that is metabolically challenged shouldn't sit on a horse? You might kill it. And that is WAY worse than flipping it over a Rolex fence and breaking all four (or two, as you claim, but I KNOW THE TRUTH) of its legs.



  3. #43
    Join Date
    Sep. 13, 2002
    Location
    Azle, Teh-has
    Posts
    7,738

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    full moon getting to you Reed?
    http://kaboomeventing.com/
    http://kaboomeventing.blogspot.com/
    Horses are amazing athletes and make no mistake -- they are the stars of the show!



  4. #44
    Join Date
    Jul. 10, 2001
    Posts
    6,706

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    Quote Originally Posted by scubed View Post
    Definitely sleeping with the trainer, but also need to make sure that you are insulting sufficient numbers of people and totally demeaning the sport that you are applying to be in charge of while replacing several keyboards, including mine!


    By the way, here is PROOF the sun does shine out of my ass when I am on XC.

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pi...8&id=624807621
    Last edited by RAyers; Feb. 18, 2011 at 03:19 PM.



  5. #45
    Join Date
    Jan. 14, 2006
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    4,018

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    Quote Originally Posted by RAyers View Post
    By the way, here is PROOF the sun does shine out of my ass when I am on XC.

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fb...807621&theater
    Darren Chiacchia won't be happy that you stole his only remaining claim to fame.



  6. #46
    Join Date
    Oct. 13, 2006
    Location
    3rd rock from the sun
    Posts
    830

    Default epic

    note to self..do not read this thread in the office...I cannot stifle the laughter...

    but RAyers..you forgot to ask about the homeopathophsyco miracle drug that doesn't test so its legal...

    I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!



  7. #47
    Join Date
    Apr. 15, 2003
    Location
    Northeast MA
    Posts
    4,047

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    Numping? Finging? Any dancing on the tables?

    I was sooooo missing the COTH that got me started here.

    Reed, don't forget that there is photographic evidence (which you removed from your profile, BTW) of you ramming your horse into a tree. Good thing you had some extra beer to give it after that!
    They don't call me frugal for nothing.
    Proud and achy member of the Eventing Grannies clique.



  8. #48
    Join Date
    Nov. 15, 2006
    Location
    Lexington, Kentucky
    Posts
    3,292

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    Quote Originally Posted by OverandOnward View Post
    All you need is the right horse. If your parents buy you the right horse you'll go from LL to 2* in a couple of years. Just hang on to the mane.

    I know this because a 14 year old told me so. Her parents just bought her the right horse. She's very excited about it, she's done a little up-bank on him, and she should go to her first recognized BN soon. She should be at Rolex before she gets her driver's license. How cool is that?

    You can, too. Anybody can. She told me so.
    I like this. But I think the Right Horse needs to be a proper noun. Does anyone have the Right Horse for a free lease? PM me. Thanks.
    We're spending our money on horses and bourbon. The rest we're just wasting.
    www.dleestudio.com



  9. #49
    Join Date
    Oct. 13, 2006
    Location
    3rd rock from the sun
    Posts
    830

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    Quote Originally Posted by RAyers View Post
    By the way, here is PROOF the sun does shine out of my ass when I am on XC.

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fb...807621&theater
    I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!



  10. #50
    Join Date
    Apr. 2, 2009
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    5,262

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    You know, you will never make it ANYWHERE unless you have worked 37 hour days with no sleep in a dark, moldy barn for David Chiduttgreen. How else could you possibly know what pain or work was? Without this, you will simply be useless and clueless for all time so you might as well just drown your fat ass in the water complex today.



  11. #51
    Join Date
    Nov. 12, 2001
    Location
    Dry Ridge, KY USA
    Posts
    3,106

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    RAyers,

    Thank you, thank you, thank you! It is so nice to find this thread today. This is a great counter to the druggie thread over on the H/J forum.

    BTW, I loff the sun shinning from your buttocks.
    When in Doubt, let your horse do the Thinking!



  12. #52
    Join Date
    Apr. 30, 2002
    Location
    Looking up
    Posts
    6,191

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    What the fruitbat! You can't do that here! You have to be a card carrying member of the troll community before any smurf dissing is allowed. However, the top hat addition is a good one and I truly believe an air vest is going to be required henceforce at Beginner Novice through Preliminary levels, but of course, optional at the international levels. Clothing also will be optional at the international levels, as the Second Wife has decreed eventing is too boring and they will be experimenting with new marketing strategies for this sport on the world level. Oh and she's removing the cross country test as well. Eventing will now have a conformation contest for horses, and a runway modelling contest for riders, in its place. Go Marmaduke.
    "Passion, though a bad regulator, is a powerful spring." -- Emerson
    www.eventhorse.wordpress.com



  13. #53
    Join Date
    Jun. 17, 2010
    Posts
    559

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    It BLAZES off the buttocks! I was once riding a greenie who was running away from me on xcountry because I'm fluffy. I caught up to the horse in front of me and it was RAyers. My horse's pink nose and my face got sunburned from 50 yds away!



  14. #54
    Join Date
    Jan. 21, 2009
    Location
    Virginia zip 20120
    Posts
    490

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    Quote Originally Posted by RAyers View Post
    By the way, here is PROOF the sun does shine out of my ass when I am on XC.

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fb...807621&theater
    need shades for that one!! Love it!

    (and by the way, can anyone PM me the name of the thin young 20-something rider who's been training and showing successful UL Event and H/J horses since she was 12?)
    “Always saddle your own horse. Always know what you’re doing. And go in the direction you are heading.” Connie Reeves
    Jump Start Solutions LLC



  15. #55
    Join Date
    Aug. 14, 2000
    Location
    Clarksdale, MS--the golden buckle on the cotton belt
    Posts
    18,639

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    The most important thing for success is to be sure that your tinfoil helmet is on the outside of your safety helmet and that the Pom Pom covers the antenna. If the Hoys become chef, you will already be in place as an acolyte.
    "I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay."
    Thread killer Extraordinaire



  16. #56
    Join Date
    Jan. 27, 2010
    Posts
    8

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    Ahhhhh, I needed this today!

    Thank you Reed



  17. #57
    Join Date
    Mar. 15, 2002
    Location
    Deep South, y\'all
    Posts
    1,555

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    Quote Originally Posted by vineyridge View Post
    The most important thing for success is to be sure that your tinfoil helmet is on the outside of your safety helmet and that the Pom Pom covers the antenna. If the Hoys become chef, you will already be in place as an acolyte.
    An acolyte Teletubby. That's what the pompom makes a rider look like, so if you're already hindered by excess fluff, you are doomed. The Hoys are slender, so merely look like anorexic TTs, but TTs nonetheless.



  18. #58
    Join Date
    Jan. 18, 2009
    Posts
    342

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    Quote Originally Posted by vineyridge View Post
    The most important thing for success is to be sure that your tinfoil helmet is on the outside of your safety helmet and that the Pom Pom covers the antenna. If the Hoys become chef, you will already be in place as an acolyte.
    The famous pom poms



  19. #59
    Join Date
    Dec. 6, 2000
    Location
    SE Mass
    Posts
    4,177

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    What if I am too fat, too old, or the wrong sex, and the trainer doesn't want to sleep with me? Can I make it up by bringing chocolates? Oh forget it, I will just eat them.

    Thanks Reed, I have missed the numping and finging. I really do not want to hear about the homeopathics, nor the intermediate riders that cannot get along with their trainers nor their boyfriends.



  20. #60
    Join Date
    Jul. 5, 2007
    Location
    Beside Myself ~ Western NY
    Posts
    6,784

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    Ooowwwwww... my sides hurt.

    I think you guys are giving me ulcers.



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