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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug. 28, 2004
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    1,806

    Default How do you say... (spin off)

    "Darling, honey, I love you to death and you're one of my best friends... but, you are a complete and utter slut"?

    The HIV thread got me thinking. I have a friend who has been with a total of 21 men since August, and I'm worried about him.



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul. 1, 2006
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    Aether
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    46

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    What point is there in saying anything? Is anything you say going to matter in terms of behavior down the road, or will it just undercut your friendship. If your friend brings it up, then you at least have leave to talk about it, but the two questions still remain.



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec. 7, 2010
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    598

    Default

    You don't. Unless you are one of his partners, and he is being safe, it isn't really your business. One person's slut is another person's prude... so I prefer just not to label anyone by their sexual choices.



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar. 30, 2007
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    Hollowed out volcano in the South Pacific.
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    10,818

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by alg0181 View Post
    You don't. Unless you are one of his partners, and he is being safe, it isn't really your business. One person's slut is another person's prude... so I prefer just not to label anyone by their sexual choices.
    He obviously isn't being safe. With a gay man who has that many non-monogamous sexual partners who are also gay or bisexual, safe sex is likely not on the table, so it's not a matter of "if', but "when", as far as getting HIV or another STD is concerned.
    SPACE FOR RENT



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov. 13, 2007
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    NW Louisiana
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    Default

    Next time he brings it up, you take the opportunity to tell him how great a friend he is, and that you're worried by his behavior, and that you would hate for anything to happen to him because you would miss him very much.



  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep. 20, 2005
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    You must never go there, Simba.
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    3,328

    Default

    I had a roommate like this once. My other roommates and I used to sit on the porch in the mornings and score the one night stands as they tried in vain to creep out unnoticed.

    Might not be the way to go for you though, OP.



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct. 3, 2007
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    PA
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    4,978

    Default

    Well, if you want to have a conversation about it you could always start with a joke. The next time he regals you with the story of one of his triumphs you could kid about the danger of it falling off from overuse or the perils of so many adventures in dark and dangerous places. Or just say you hope he is keeping it clean and covered when it is out and about. Hopefully from there you can start a serious conversation.



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov. 9, 2005
    Location
    uk
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    15,265

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Coppers mom View Post
    "Darling, honey, I love you to death and you're one of my best friends... but, you are a complete and utter slut"?

    The HIV thread got me thinking. I have a friend who has been with a total of 21 men since August, and I'm worried about him.
    you cant live his life for him and those choices he makes are his own
    all you can do as a mate is be there to pick the peices up brush him down slap him on the bum and send him back out in the real world



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec. 4, 2007
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    Ontario
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Coppers mom View Post
    "Darling, honey, I love you to death and you're one of my best friends... but, you are a complete and utter slut"?

    The HIV thread got me thinking. I have a friend who has been with a total of 21 men since August, and I'm worried about him.
    You just do.

    You say "I'm really worried, and I need to talk to you about this."

    Best friends don't let things like this go unsaid. They talk about everything, even the things that hurt like hell to get off your chest.
    Riding the winds of change

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