I have a really nice saddle that I'm in the "process" of selling.
By "process" I mean I need you guys' advice! lol. So I have a friend that really needs a new saddle. And I suggested she try mine out. She loved it and said she would love to buy it; just let her know the price. Me, being nice, gave her a price that is on the low end of what it's worth. She said to me, "Ok, I can have this much on this day and the rest on this day." All righty, sounds good.
Then she said she needed to try it on her horse and possibly have her trainer come look at it. Again, sounds like a plan. I want her to get a saddle that fits her horse. Saddle fits horse well and trainer agrees. Trainer thinks that the saddle will help my friend ride a lot better.
Well, I'm kind of short on money for competitions and lessons (my mom only gives me so much lol. She pays for everything else, so this is fine.) It is now a couple wks past the first day that she said she would have the money. So I sent asked her if she still wanted the saddle. She said that she has to sell her saddle first.. ok? I wasn't aware of this. But ok, that's ok. I can wait.
I've been talking to her recently and she's not even Trying to market her saddle. She isn't trying to sell it at all, but still expects me to let her ride in my saddle at lessons.
So, now I'm kind of in an odd spot. She is my friend, I did give her a discount. She told me she could have the money by a certain date. But now she wont and I don't know When she will. If she had of told me that she had to sell her saddle first, then that would of been a better position for me. But she never told me that she had to sell it first. She is also leaving in about 3 months, so I think her brain might be a little scattered. I REALLY need to sell this saddle so that I can continue taking lessons and such (I have a young horse, need lessons lol). I just don't know what to say. Because I KNOW if I put the saddle on eBay I can get more than the price I offered to her... I want to keep her as a friend, as I really do like her, but I really need to sell this stupid saddle. And if she's not even making an effort to sell her saddle, then I feel that I should be able to tell her that I've decided to sell it on eBay or something. If she was making an effort to sell her saddle, that would be a different story.
So. To sum it up. I'm confused. And annoyed. I need the
money. I need to sell the saddle. blah
Last edited by crazyhorses; Jul. 22, 2010 at 10:39 PM.
Reason: can't write =)
You can just tell her you really need the money, so you have to take the saddle back and try to sell it somewhere else, unless she can give you the money right away. No money, no saddle. If she whines, tell her sorry, you need the money soooo badly you can't wait. Too bad.
Thanks! Would it be a bad idea to say that I have someone else interested in it but since she was the one who wanted it first, then she can have a week to come up with the money? Or better not to say that?
I don't think you need to make up any kind of story. If she is any sort of friend she "should" understand your position.
Explain to her why you need to sell the saddle ASAP and extend her a reasonable time frame to come up with the entire price. If she cannot do that, you need to tell her that due to YOUR circumstances, you will need another outlet to sell your saddle. Sorry for her bad luck, but you are being put in a bad position. Honesty is the best way to go here and if she values your friendship, she "should" understand.
You could tell her that someone else is interested and wants the saddle on trial on x date. That way it gives a firm date that she has to either pay up or physically give up the saddle without you being the "meanie", since the deadline is being drawn by the made-up potential buyer.
I had a similar experience, except mine wound up being returned with a broken tree, less than half the purchase price paid, and a friendship ended. Lesson learned the hard way, friendship and money don't mix - GET YOUR SADDLE BACK!
West of insanity, east of apathy, deep in the heart of Texas.
I agree that the truthful approach is always the best. Just tell her that the agreed-upon deadline for her to have the money to you has passed, and you need your saddle back. No drama, no accusations, just, "Hey, when can I come pick up my saddle?".
Don't give her an option, or an extension, or anything else. Your friend isn't stupid; she just wants to hold onto something nice as long as she can, without paying for it. You can decide later whether a person like that merits your friendship, but for now, just get your saddle back and list it on eBay.
Making up stories, however well-inclined the reason, usually end up backfiring on you in the long run.
You: "Hey, I've got someone else interested in the saddle. Can I either get the cash from you or the saddle back?"
Her: "Sure - let me know if the other person doesn't end up taking it, okay?"
One week later:
Her: "Did that other person end up taking your saddle?"
You: "Well...." and then you either make up another story or tell her that you made up the first one in the first place. Or, she browses through Ebay and recognizes your saddle and realizes that you made the initial story up...
Be honest. Say to her that you really need the money to buy x,y,z and that she has first dibs, but you need to put it up on Ebay and can cancel the auction if she comes up with the cash.
I HATE selling things to friends. Owed money and friendship make for uncomfortable situations. Just be honest, and if she's really a good friend, she'll understand.
"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison
So, the Zen Buddhist says to the hotdog vendor, "Make me one with everything."
"Hey Friend, I am running a bit short on cash to pay for lessons and shows. I am going to put up the saddle for sale, but you have first dibs and I will take down the ads if I get the money by date x. Thanks!"
I wouldn't make up any stories about having someone else interested in it - as was pointed out, that will likely just backfire on you. Just tell her truth and don't let her weasel out of paying any longer - she might try and ask for one more week or something, but I would be firm with her at this point as she is already long overdue when she was supposed to have paid for it!