He came home from overseas, we talked, we fought, we hashed and rehashed. (And I did follow all a$$-covering advice as well.)
Affair has apparently been over for about a year or so, had gone on 1.5-2 years. I'll spare the details...but he 'fessed up to everything. I had not given him all the information I have, so that I would have an idea if he was truthful.
He went to a counselor a few days later, then I went, now we've gone together twice. I decided to work on it for now, for a couple reasons:
1) I don't want to regret later that I didn't try to save my marriage (esp. since young son in picture)
2) Our counseling sessions have opened us both up so that right now we're actually getting along better than ever.
3) I truly believe he is repentant.
4) I told him he had to write an email to his entire family confessing the affair, and that it all had to be out in the open (and he immediately did).
Yes, I know this could all wind up STILL biting me in the a$$. I am not naive. But so far, so good. Could I end up single down the road? Absolutely. But my conscience will be clear, which is important to me.
Merry Christmas to all, and thanks for the past words of advice and encouragement.
Windward Farm, Washougal, WA- our work in progress, our money pit, our home!
Well done! Marriage is hard, hard work. Too many people forget that they take constant maintenance to survive. You have a huge issue in yours, but it sounds like you're on the right track. I admire you for trying to save yours. Good luck and Merry Christmas.
Proud member of the "Don't rush to kill wildlife" clique!