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  1. #1
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default Advice - Barn Problems

    So I'm having some problems at my barn right now. I full lease a very nice gelding but right now he is off until October. I take at least one lesson a week and show at least twice a month in the summer. Right now I am in 2nd place in our local circut and was told I can show another horse but I am never allowed to get on this horse. Everyone else (who does not show) gets to lesson. I'm also completly ignored in every other aspect of the barn since the gelding got hurt. I'm very tempted to leave this barn and find another place but I don't want to leave the horse because I don't know what will happen. We have a great bond and he does not get along very well with other people. I can't afford to buy him though because I am still in college and don't want that financial burden...

    I guess I know what I should do but some advice would be great.

    ETA: I am not complaning about not being able to ride the horse I lease. His health comes first. I am angry at being pushed to the back burner because I am not the richest person in the barn
    Last edited by myALTERnative; Aug. 11, 2009 at 12:27 PM.



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun. 24, 2005
    Posts
    659

    Default

    You are going to have to decide what is most important to you - your points on the circuit, or the horse. They are being generous loaning you their lesson horse, and what makes you think they will not care for the horse if you leave? I do not think they are obligated to give you another horse to ride, or show unless it was in the lease agreement. Many trainers do - but again, they are not obligated.

    What is spelled out in the lease are far as injury? Will you still have to pay the lease if you leave? Horses do get hurt, and if you own a horse - you just have to take the time off along with him, or pay for another way. No one hands you another horse to ride.

    This is a good learning lesson for you. Your other option is to not lease, not buy, and just ride whatever is available for lessons. Unfortunately horses are expensive, and no one is at fault here.



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan. 2, 2006
    Location
    Dallas, NC
    Posts
    2,317

    Default

    How was the horse hurt? I would wonder since you are out of the loop since he was injured?
    I want a signature but I have nothing original to say except: "STHU and RIDE!!!

    Wonderful COTHER's I've met: belleellis, stefffic, snkstacres and janedoe726.



  4. #4
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default

    The lease is on a private horse and I was told I can show a lesson horse but every time I go to schedule a lesson it seems like it's more important that someone else who has been at the barn longer rides him. The show is coming up next week and I don't care if I ride after the show but my entries are already in so I would like to go to the show having at least one lesson on the horse at the height I will be showing. But it's more then just the showing. If you don't have mutiple horses in training and spend your summer traveling (which is somewhat new at are barn) you no longer matter and get ignored.

    I know everything about the injury to the horse I ride because I am out there everyday with him. He had an infection from getting his hocks injected.



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun. 14, 2006
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    11,372

    Default

    I was with ya til the word "bond".

    Anyway. Is it a barn owned horse or is it a privately owned horse?
    A good horseman doesn't have to tell anyone...the horse already knows.

    Might be a reason, never an excuse...



  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct. 16, 2008
    Location
    Central Oklahoma
    Posts
    3,270

    Default

    What you need to do is stop whining, taking on their offer to show another horse, and riding this one when he is fully recovered. Grow up a little bit for god's sake. How can you even complain when the owner did the absolutely the right thing to put this horse' welfare in the first priority? A true horse person never puts her own vanity above a horse' welfare. If you want to leave this barn, LEAVE. You don't deserve this nice gelding.



  7. #7

    Default

    Gloria, I think the problem is that the OP isn't whining about not being able to ride the horse that is currently laid up but that they gave her a school horse to take to the show but whenever she comes to ride him in a lesson before the show as she hasn't ridden him before, they tell her someone else is riding him that day and she can't.



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov. 2, 2006
    Posts
    1,905

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BuddyRoo View Post
    I was with ya til the word "bond".
    Me too, I cringed a little.

    OP- Talk to the owner/trainer of the horse you have entered in the show and express your desire to ride the horse before the show.

    If you still don't feel like you are getting what you want, then perhaps it is time to move to another farm and terminate your lease on the other horse. You will find another horse you connected with.



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar. 12, 2006
    Posts
    4,343

    Default

    A true horse person never puts her own vanity above a horse' welfare. If you want to leave this barn, LEAVE. You don't deserve this nice gelding.
    That's a little harsh- I think she gets that her lease horse out of commission and it sounds like she wants to stay with him and help care for him while she can't ride. She wants to presumably *pay* to take a lesson on a school horse that she is presumably *paying* to show. I think it would be nice, if you have been a *paying* client that they provide you with a lesson time for one lesson prior to a show. It is in the trainers best interest for you to go do well at a show- good advertising. I don't see it as the OP being vain, just wanting to avoid being put in the position of essentially having a catch ride at a show.

    However, in reality, if it was your own horse that was lame, you'd eat your entry fees and not be getting your year end award.



  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct. 16, 2008
    Location
    Central Oklahoma
    Posts
    3,270

    Default

    Analise,

    I posted before she responded with more details. My bad. I apologize. I was reading the initial post and was not too impressed about her complaining about unable to ride this injured horse and wanting to leave the barn despite their offer to ride another horse... Again my apology...



  11. #11
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia73 View Post
    That's a little harsh- I think she gets that her lease horse out of commission and it sounds like she wants to stay with him and help care for him while she can't ride. She wants to presumably *pay* to take a lesson on a school horse that she is presumably *paying* to show. I think it would be nice, if you have been a *paying* client that they provide you with a lesson time for one lesson prior to a show. It is in the trainers best interest for you to go do well at a show- good advertising. I don't see it as the OP being vain, just wanting to avoid being put in the position of essentially having a catch ride at a show.

    However, in reality, if it was your own horse that was lame, you'd eat your entry fees and not be getting your year end award.
    Thank you. The welfare of the horse I lease does come first. I still pay my lease on the horse even though he is off because I love the horse (and the owner is not a horse person but is stuck with the horse because he bought it for his ex-wife) but what I'm angry about is being told I can do something then get pushed to the back burner because I don't have 5 grand to spend every month on horse shows when I work full time, go to school full time, and help the barn out FOR FREE at shows. I think I deserve to be treated just like everyone else does. The barn was not always like this. We used to be one big family



  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jun. 14, 2006
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    11,372

    Default

    Ahhh...I see. They're not saying you CAN'T ride the horse, it's just that the people who normally ride the horse get first dibs on ride times....

    Let's swap the situation around for a moment.

    1) Let's say that YOU offered use of your horse so someone else could continue showing.
    2) But then, the person you offered was all ticked because they couldn't ride when they wanted to--you got first dibs.

    What would you think about that?

    Hmmmm.

    Methinks you need to realize that they are doing you a FAVOR and if you were in a similar situation, wouldn't you expect that the horse YOU pay for or own would make you the priority rider?
    A good horseman doesn't have to tell anyone...the horse already knows.

    Might be a reason, never an excuse...



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Sep. 2, 2005
    Location
    Upstate NY
    Posts
    12,950

    Default

    Sorry to hear your lease horse is lame.

    It is very generous of the barn to offer you a lesson horse to ride to finish off the showing year.

    Have you simply asked your trainer if you can ride this lesson horse at your scheduled lesson time so you can prepare for the show?

    I know the show is coming up quickly now so it may be too late but next time simply say at the beginning of the week that if you are going to be given the wonderful opportunity to show Dobbin can you please ride him during your already scheduled lesson time so you can prepare for the show.

    These other people that are riding this lesson horse might have their own reasons why they want to ride him too. You do have to remember that.



  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jul. 5, 2007
    Location
    Beside Myself ~ Western NY
    Posts
    7,345

    Default

    Jeez, too many people are being hard on her... Not much whining going on. But a fair amount of disappointment and frustration.

    Just curious, OP, what do you feel you should do?

    MHO is that you should suck it up, and if you don't feel safe riding the lesson horse, just call it an early year.
    Why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?
    ~ Dave Barry



  15. #15
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BuddyRoo View Post
    Ahhh...I see. They're not saying you CAN'T ride the horse, it's just that the people who normally ride the horse get first dibs on ride times....

    Let's swap the situation around for a moment.

    1) Let's say that YOU offered use of your horse so someone else could continue showing.
    2) But then, the person you offered was all ticked because they couldn't ride when they wanted to--you got first dibs.

    What would you think about that?

    Hmmmm.

    Methinks you need to realize that they are doing you a FAVOR and if you were in a similar situation, wouldn't you expect that the horse YOU pay for or own would make you the priority rider?
    I was told three times I could have a lesson this day to get ready for the show then get canclled because someone else wants to ride horse. I'm sorry but I think that the week before the show I should get priority because this is a big "A" show. The other person who keeps going out to ride the lesson horse owns their own horse and just decided they didn't want to ride him anymore. I'm not asking for priority all the time I just want one lesson in before the show.

    I don't think ONE lesson is asking to much



  16. #16
    Join Date
    Feb. 19, 2009
    Posts
    4,994

    Default

    have you already spoken to your trainer about this? What the the reason behind not letting you ride the other horse you would be able to show?

    I would think that if you discussed this with your trainer and were able to come at a time when a school horse was available, they would be open to letting you ride. Both of the places I ride at do this, however only when the horses aren't being used by other clients. I also understand the frustration of feeling like you are being excluded because you are probably riding/at the barn less since your horse is injured. However, just go out of your way then to show up, see if others need help, talk to your trainer about other things you might be able to do for her (like hack other horses), or something like that to keep you in the loop!

    ETA: I took too long to post and missed your new information. If you just want one lesson, there has got to be a time that is open before your show. Try to see if you can fit in a less common time. Most people seem to either ride in the morning or evening after work. I bet if you could do a mid afternoon time, the horse would be available.



  17. #17
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by trubandloki View Post
    Sorry to hear your lease horse is lame.

    It is very generous of the barn to offer you a lesson horse to ride to finish off the showing year.

    Have you simply asked your trainer if you can ride this lesson horse at your scheduled lesson time so you can prepare for the show?

    I know the show is coming up quickly now so it may be too late but next time simply say at the beginning of the week that if you are going to be given the wonderful opportunity to show Dobbin can you please ride him during your already scheduled lesson time so you can prepare for the show.

    These other people that are riding this lesson horse might have their own reasons why they want to ride him too. You do have to remember that.
    Other girl rides during my lesson so I have been trying to find a different time and have even offered to take time out of work to go ride and that keeps getting cancelled



  18. #18
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SmartAlex View Post
    Jeez, too many people are being hard on her... Not much whining going on. But a fair amount of disappointment and frustration.

    Just curious, OP, what do you feel you should do?

    MHO is that you should suck it up, and if you don't feel safe riding the lesson horse, just call it an early year.

    I feel like I should be leaving this barn and not just becaue of the show. There is constant fighting at the barn now and the trainer is getting extremely money hungary and pushing most clients away except for the 2 or 3 that have several horses in traning and go to all the away shows



  19. #19
    Join Date
    Jul. 5, 2007
    Location
    Beside Myself ~ Western NY
    Posts
    7,345

    Default

    This "last straw" kind of moment is probably being made worse because of the additional emotion you are adding to it over your disappointment. Maybe not, maybe it's been a long time coming. Just remember... horses can break your heart, and where they leave off, the horse people are often right behind them to finish the job.

    Do you feel they are using this situation as a bit of a payback for your having done well all year? Jealousy rearing it's ugly head?
    Why is it that a woman will forgive homicidal behavior in a horse, yet be highly critical of a man for leaving the toilet seat up?
    ~ Dave Barry



  20. #20
    myALTERnative Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SmartAlex View Post
    This "last straw" kind of moment is probably being made worse because of the additional emotion you are adding to it over your disappointment. Maybe not, maybe it's been a long time coming. Just remember... horses can break your heart, and where they leave off, the horse people are often right behind them to finish the job.

    Do you feel they are using this situation as a bit of a payback for your having done well all year? Jealousy rearing it's ugly head?
    I really don't know. All I know is I can't even stand going out to the barn anymore becase the tension is so thick you could cut it with a knife. I do think problems have been building for a while and I was oblivious to them due to things going on in my own life. It's hard because the training is great when the trainer cares but when she doesn't no one ever gets anywhere. I hope it's not a jealousy thing because I feel there are much better riders at the barn. I'm just very fustrated and how everything is being handled. I have tried to talk to the trainer and I pretty much get brushed off or told I'll call you with what time you can lesson and a week later I still haven't gotten that phone call



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