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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar. 7, 2003
    Posts
    4,057

    Default So until Animal Planet comes out with the spin off of "Jockeys", entitled...

    ..."Rehabilitators", a reality show focused on the dramatic lives of those dedicated to the transition of off track thoroughbreds, you'll just have to settle for this little vignette:

    A Day in the Life of Salty's Actress

    7:30 am Eat delicious breakfast.

    7:45 am Get turned out to pasture. Thrust head into halter to expedite the turnout process.

    7:46 am Perform systems check.

    7:47 – 8:00 am Eat delicious hay. Claim ownership of all delicious hay piles. Eventually concede to allowing Pea to eat some of the delicious hay as well.

    8:01 am Migrate down to water hole for a drink.

    8:02 – 9:00 am Resume eating delicious hay.

    9:01 am Come down to barn and ask W for second helpings of delicious hay while she’s still puttering about in the barn and before she goes off to do whatever else it is that she does.

    11:00 am Nap in sun.

    11:30 am Contemplate unusual feelings towards boys in neighboring pasture.

    11:31 am Flirt over fence with boys in neighboring pasture.

    11:42 am Break fence while attempting to get into boys’ pasture. Feign alarm and run away to opposite end of own pasture.

    11:45 am Engage Pea in spontaneous running of Filly and Mare Turf.

    11:47:22.75 am Gloat about utter domination over competition. Rebut that twenty year age difference is nothing but a pitiful excuse.

    12:30 pm Dig through the remaining snow to see what’s under it.

    12:45 pm Dig through the grass beneath the snow to see what’s under it.

    1:00 pm Eat delicious hay. When called, come down to barn to eat delicious lunch! Make nasty faces at Pea when she comes down and asks to share delicious lunch.

    1:20 pm Look innocent while W repairs fence for umpty millionth time.

    1:30 pm Continue to look innocent while W tamps divots.

    1:31 pm Mug W for treats while she tamps divots. Upon realization that no treats will be produced, run to pile of delicious hay at opposite end of pasture, creating more divots.

    3:30 pm Get brought in to barn to get ready for ride.

    3:31 pm Look adorable while standing in aisle on crossties.

    3:35 pm Nod head up and down in vehement protest of stiff brush usage.

    3:40 pm Resume looking adorable while getting tacked up.

    3:45 pm Take opportunity to snuggle with W when she unsnaps crossties to put on bridle.

    3:50 pm Make genuine effort to attempt what is asked under saddle.

    3:53 pm Struggle to maintain focus.

    4:05 pm Strike out violently at dead oak leaf fluttering across path, in practice for real threats like an errant wild turkey or those pesky dogs that come wandering over from the neighbors’, inadvertently giving W heart palpitations.

    4:06 pm Resume struggle to maintain focus.

    4:30 pm Look adorable while getting untacked. Mug for treats.

    4:35 pm Eat delicious treats.

    4:40 pm Get turned back out.

    4:41 pm Look good.

    4:43 pm Roll.

    4:44 pm Roll on other side. Resume eating delicious hay.

    5:45 pm Come down to barn in anticipation of delicious dinner.

    6:00 pm Get brought in to stall. Thrust head into halter to expedite the process.

    6:10 pm Eat delicious dinner!

    6:20 pm Suddenly feel urge to walk about stall while night rug is being put on.

    6:21 pm Resume eating delicious hay.

    10:00 pm Eat more delicious hay. Allow human to pick stall and run out paddock.

    11:30 pm – 7:30 am Stand in run out paddock and keep watchful eye for predators. At some point rearrange bedding in stall. Remove shavings from bank against wall and pile them in front of door. When satisfied with bed lie down to sleep. Wake up and wait for delicious breakfast.
    Action packed, isn't it? I don't know how any producer could resist.

    Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, Yes!, this is the same Salty's Actress who was cover filly for Equipolitan this time last year.

    Happy spring everyone. Don't mind me while I go off my nut.



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct. 16, 2000
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    2,539

    Default



    Thanks for the giggle.
    Seb
    Aca-Believe it!!



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug. 6, 2002
    Location
    NJ, USA
    Posts
    2,287

    Default

    I love it!!!! That is gorgeous, I would definitely tune in if that could possibly be replicated decently on film.

    Just precious,
    Thanks for multiple grins & chuckles,
    Arcadien



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec. 4, 2002
    Location
    Dungeon of the Ivory Tower
    Posts
    20,394

    Default

    Ted would watch this BIG TIME.

    Well, so would I!!!!
    www.specialhorses.org
    a 501(c)3 organization helping 501(c)3 equine rescues




  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct. 18, 2000
    Posts
    22,442

    Default

    Brilliant! Bravo!



  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan. 17, 2008
    Location
    Middle Tn
    Posts
    528

    Default

    Bravo! Sounds just like an OTTB Mare I know....
    "Farriers are the hairdressers of the horse world. They know everything about everybody..."-Lildunhorse



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct. 31, 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    1,997

    Default

    Reminds me of a certain redheaded TB mare....but she'd be Pea in this situation. She's the submissive in the two mares relationship.



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec. 13, 2001
    Location
    SE Virginia
    Posts
    1,243

    Default

    Very cute! I'd watch for sure! Sounds like a very special girl
    see my ribbon quilts at: www.ribbonquilts.com



  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov. 29, 2005
    Posts
    2,625

    Default

    That would be a barn favorite



  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb. 24, 2009
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    357

    Default

    I'm installing cable in my center aisle right now. You give me a call when you're on-air.

    Also, I've been asked by one pony and one OTTB to inquire politely as to how they might get a subscription to your magazine? I suspect they are after the content in "7 signs you're for sale." I heard them talking when they were pretending to play halter tag and I think they could only come up with 3.




  11. #11
    Join Date
    May. 16, 2001
    Location
    Alaska. Not in an Igloo.
    Posts
    8,993

    Default

    HA!

    I wish I had that life



  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jul. 23, 2001
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    1,963

    Default

    Thank you! I thoroughly enjoyed this!

    On a more serious note, I won't watch the Jockey series, which seems to be primarily about how dangerous being a jockey is, complete with scary (sometimes tragic) falls. Yuck.

    I think a reality show on OTTBs being rehabbed would be a hit!!



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Mar. 8, 2006
    Location
    Southeast Pennsylvania
    Posts
    2,666

    Default

    Love it! I can picture one very happy mare!



  14. #14
    Join Date
    Mar. 7, 2003
    Posts
    4,057

    Default

    Well I'm glad you guys find Miss Salty girl as amusing as I do.

    Quote Originally Posted by jengersnap
    Reminds me of a certain redheaded TB mare....but she'd be Pea in this situation.
    Being a little like Pea is not a bad thing...she's an amazing girl in her own right, and while she's always been a follower in herd situations, under saddle she has literally saved my a$$ on more than one occasion.

    On the subject of redheads, my Salty has a full sister out there somewhere (well, I hope she's still out there), one year younger and in chestnut, named Salty Kisses (how cute is that?) She's on my virtual stable; the last I was notified she was at Mountaineer in September 08 with trainer Duane Knipe.

    Quote Originally Posted by sch1star
    I'm installing cable in my center aisle right now. You give me a call when you're on-air.

    Also, I've been asked by one pony and one OTTB to inquire politely as to how they might get a subscription to your magazine? I suspect they are after the content in "7 signs you're for sale." I heard them talking when they were pretending to play halter tag and I think they could only come up with 3.
    No one has officially picked up the show yet (can you believe it?!) but I'll keep you posted. Maybe I should set up a webcam?

    Sadly, like many periodicals Equipolitan could not survive the online era. However, pony and OTTB may find it worth noting that of the seven signs, the two dead giveaways are having to submit to rides from strangers and visits from unfamiliar vets.

    Should pony and OTTB believe that they are indeed at risk of sale, they may find helpful this advice from the article within that same issue of Equipolitan entitled "Unreasonable Rider? When to Dump Him, and How!"

    As revealed in the article, the most effective de-ridering methods include the stop-and-drop shoulder, the spin-and-bolt, and as a last resort, the rear-and-flip. Of course, pony and OTTB would be wise to only use these techniques on strange riders, and never, ever on their current owner!



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