Skyking I'm sorry I know my post was way too long, but I had to get that all off my chest you know?
Otherwise you are right, I have been compromising too much and for too long a time, it's been kinda like a bad/abusive marriage where one person has all the control and the other is afraid to leave because they can't afford to be on their own. I know now kinda how those women feel.
DressageGeek I don't think I have any liability in this situation, beyond the moral kind.
Yes, good barns do exist but they are few and far between. I am at one now. I had my 2 at one 7 yrs ago, and moved after a little over a year, which was dumb, because since I have had to pay full board and clean stalls and buy feed and hay and shavings and feed other boarders' horses because the other BOs were like yours. All with me not only paying full board but also giving the BOs extra money since they claimed they were broke and sick. (Don't fall for the sick thing, as they will lie about illness. But longest I lasted was almost 2 1/2 years with me feeding every night and doing all the work for my 2 while other boarders did not know their horses stayed out 24/7 and were fed on the ground in their paddocks, surrounded by about 35 raccoons.
And yes if you clue in other boarders you get into trouble, so you either help out free or the horses go untended. And of course when you quit doing all the work around the barn, the BO gets furious cause you are the "help", meaning dummy to worry about the welfare of horses.
You wouldn't believe how many BOs in my area are drunks and/or mentally ill, one was actually certified fetal alcohol syndrome. And they are smart enough to cheap on lots of things like feed and hay and supplements. Aand they know that owners who do not go out daily to see their horses do not see what they are getting cheated on.
I now pay $425 at a good place with an honest owner. It is far out of town but worth it for my horse.
My advice: Find a self-care barn and quietly move your horse. Do not argue with BO, just move quietly, give notice the day you move and pay for the month you won't be there. BOs can be dangerous when they are mad.
And I know that some BOs, like the one I now have, are wonderful, and I know that some boarders are too demanding. But I've seen the bad BO side too many tines,m and haven't seen the bad boarders as the ones I've boarded with were clueless about what was going on at the barns.
Yikes. First of all, please contact that horse's owner, even if you have to leave an anonymous letter in their mailbox.
Yes, there are great barn owners/trainers out there. Mine is one of the few, she is also our trainer. She manages 200 acres, including a cross country course, 2 dressage arenas, jumping arena and 9 paddocks all on her own. She takes care of the 6 retired school horses, 2 remaining school horses and 8boarder horses. She helped me when my horse, on month 3 of stall rest, became too much for me to handwalk. She came out Christmas eve when I found him trying to jump out of his stall, told me to go home after he settled and sat for a few more hours in the damp cold watching him and finally bringing in a "buddy" into the stall across from his. She goes above and beyond, sometimes giving people financial breaks only to see them leave and suddenly have cash to buy trailers, go to shows, etc. She started and trained the youngest person to ever do a 4-star event (Michael Pollard). She's wise, compassionate, tough, knowledgeable and always puts her horses first.
She's dirt poor and in debt now and always will be. She's given up everything for what she loves and I will never find the like of her again. She doesn't push showing and makes a pittance when she coaches us at shows. She doesn't have a greedy bone in her body and I guess that's why she's constantly worried about money and will never get ahead, much less break even.
My post doesn't give you concrete help (a place to move to unless you're in SC), but I hope I answered your question asking if there is honest, non-greedy horse people. They are out there, although it looks like they are not as numerous as we need them to be.
I wish you luck getting out of your current situation and finding something good for both you and your horse.
One thing you might consider is trying to find a small piece of land to rent. I leased land and a barn for about 200/mo for several years (just left last fall when my friends bought their farm). I did my own chores and the maintenance, etc...and it was a lot of work but I at least knew my horses were safe and healthy.
The bitten horse without treatment could set up a situation for permanent debilitation if not death without intervention.
Can you find something even temporary for your horse so you can get out of there and tell the owner?
Do you have a contract? Is the BO in breach?
I'm sorry....sometimes, you have to kiss a lot of frogs...but yes there ARE nice enough places with good care in most areas within your price range. You just have to hunt for them. Or work off some board, etc etc.
A good horseman doesn't have to tell anyone...the horse already knows.
I'd call the owner of the bitten horse, tell her what happened, and tell her that the BO threatened to kick you out if you said anything. The BO doesn't have to know ANYONE called the owner. The owner, for all the BO knows, could have just "dropped by" the barn and found her horse that way.
By the way, if I ever found my horse injured like that and found out others knew and didn't say anything? You would not want to be on the receiving end of what I'd have to say.
Your BO sounds like a pretty pitiful person. Please do whatever you have to do to find a new place.