Interestingly, yesterday on Dave Ramsey's radio show, he had an entire segment on people who decided not to get married because of financial issues. Not as unusual as you might think.
DH & I lived together for 28 years before we got married (his idea).
I felt as committed during those years as if I had the State-sanctioned license, but in the end I was glad we did get legally married.
It gave me the status of wife and allowed me to make the final decision for him.
Ending Life Support is not a choice I hope you ever have to make, but unless your state recognizes Civil Unions, consider how it might affect you.
As for finances: we had separate bank accounts for personal things and one shared for the house expenses.
BUT, as far as the cars/parts go... those could easily be equines sitting around (and costing a lot more $ to do so!!) So keep in mind that plenty of females are on COTH all the time complaining about their spouses pressuring them to unload the nags. ;)
My boyfriend and I have been living together for 7 years now, and were dating before that, and friends well before that!
We discuss marriage now and then. Like the OP, I'm not overly excited about having a proper wedding. I'm shy - I hate crowds, and I hate being the center of attention even more, add in the fact we'd have to pay money for the experience and I'm steering clear :) We'd likely just get married with a couple of friends in attendance in the backyard or on a vacation but honestly, it's really not a priority for either of us.
We're both happy and very committed to each other, we don't have children, we both are financially independent of each other, we both work. I kind of feel like we're happy and marriage wouldn't change anything, so what's the point. The best reason I can come up with is that my last name is difficult for people to spell and that can lead to complications with licenses, doctor visits, etc when it's spelled different on different documents. He has a nice normal last name and think I'd enjoy the simplicity of using it ;) I admit to getting annoyed when people assume there is something wrong with our relationship because we're not married. But not annoyed enough to get married to make them happy ;)
think you are annoyed at how he uses his money now with not paying more than the minimum balance now? just wait till it is "your money" that he is doing that with. does he do the same with credit cards?
its not about the cars, they just represent his attitude about money to you, I bet if he did not rely on you to keep his finances straight, overdraw accounts and if he was doing a better job on paying off the loans you would not mind the cars
Depends who you're trying to please.....think that one over ;)
He supports my horses and I support his cars, but I wish he was less cavalier about spending on cars when he has loans to pay off.
I am happy that others have had long relationships without marriage. Thank you all for the advice and I appreciate everyone's point of view.
since you two live together and own a home together, I would check with an attorney re common law marriage and see if you do break up if you will have any legal obligations regarding his finances