A Gentlemen's Agreement.

[War Admiral]

Actually got the Avemaster out for a little walk down the road today.

The Grand One is SO epically spoiled nowadays that, on occasion, I stop at the end of the driveway and ask him which direction HE would like to drive today, just for a treat. (...And for the record, no, he never EVER says "back to the barn please!" If he did, I wouldn't grant him this privilege.)

Today he decided that, in the interest of getting to visit other horses, he was brave enough to face the Terrifying German Shepherd Attack Dogs (who are of course penned, but Lordy do they kick up a racket), so we proceeded in that direction at his request.

Once you get past those dogs, you go on down the road a piece and there's a cute little redneck farmette with 3 horses and two very, very, VERY old farm dawgs. They are adorable - grey muzzles, arthritis, very slow, a little shaky on their pegs.

Avery and these two elderly dogs have seemingly arrived at a gentlemen's agreement. It goes something like this.

Dogs: "We promise not to chase or hurt you, so long as you will act just a little bit scared of us. We ain't the dawgs we used to be, but we still do our job and protect our property as best we can."

Avery: "Well, boys, that deal there suits this old horse just fine. I'm not as fast as I used to be, either, and I'm kinda creaky too. So you all just go on ahead and make a little bit of noise and I'll skitter and be on my way down the road. Don't scare my human, though, she's chicken."

And so the brave old dogs creak heroically out to the end of their driveway and manfully go "ROWF!" exactly once with their toothless old jaws. Avery sticks his nose in the air and takes exactly ONE sideways step. The dogs then retreat at leisure and Avery continues contentedly down the road, honor having been satisfied by all parties.

The phrase "three one-legged men in an asp-kicking contest" does in fact spring to mind. :D :lol: We've been doing this little Civil War Reenactment *every* time we pass this way, and it never fails to crack me up.

God bless all our old dear ones! :yes:

[Ashemont]

Thanks for sharing that story... I can just see it :) Sometimes our animals are far wiser than we are, huh? ;)

[SLW]

LOL, perfect!! The Toby Keith song "as Good as I once was" was the background music once I got to the sentence where you first mention "gentlemens agreement."

Sounds like a peaceful drive all and all.

[War Admiral]

Thanks guys. ;)

Not familiar with that song, I'll have to check it out!

[Drive NJ]

Here you go WA. And give that grand old guy a carrot from us!

"As Good As I Once Was"

She said, "I'e seen you in here before."
I said, "I've been here a time or two."
She said, "Hello, my name is Bobby Jo
Meet my twin sister Betty Lou
And we're both feeling kinda wild tonight
And you're the only cowboy in this place
And if you're up for a rodeo
We'll put a big Texas smile on your face"

I said, "Girls,"

[Chorus]
I ain't as good as I once was
I got a few years on me now
But there was a time back in my prime
When I could really lay it down
And if you need some love tonight
Then I might have just enough
I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

I still hang out with my best friend dave
Ive known him since we were kids at school
Last night he had a few shots
Got in a tight spot hustlin' a game of pool
With a couple of redneck boys
One great big bad biker man
I heard David yell across the room
"Hey buddy, how 'bout a helping hand."

I said, "Dave,"

[Chorus]
I ain't as good as I once was
My how the years have flown
But there was a time back in my prime
When I could really hold my own
But if you wanna fight tonight
Guess thouse boys dont look all that tough
I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

I used to be hell on wheels
Back when I was younger man
Now my body says, "You can't do this boy"
But my pride says, "Oh, yes you can

I ain't as good as I once was
Thats just the cold hard truth
I still throw a few back, talk a little smack
When I'm feelin bullet proof
So don't double dog dare me now
'Cause I'd have to call your bluff

I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was
Maybe not be good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

[War Admiral]

Awww thanks DNJ!!!

I'm not really a dog person - anyone know what toothless ol' dawgs can eat, if one were of a mind to give them a Christmas pressie?? (Nice way to get to know the owner, I'm thinking, just drop by & tell this story...)

[olehossgal]

What a great story; I had a wonderful chuckle and a superb 'mind picture'--thanks for sharing!

Margo

[War Admiral]

Glad you liked. Welcome to COTH!! Do you drive?

[bdj]

Awww thanks DNJ!!!

I'm not really a dog person - anyone know what toothless ol' dawgs can eat, if one were of a mind to give them a Christmas pressie?? (Nice way to get to know the owner, I'm thinking, just drop by & tell this story...)

WA, I've been in love with Avery ever since I first found this board and read about his MoNeighs! He really is a fantastic horse.

Since I've seen a few dogs through the toothless stages myself - Just about every dog I've ever met LOVES hotdogs - and for the old and tooth deprived, they're pretty gummable.
Of course, if you want to get really fancy about it, I can probably get you a friend's recipe for (brace yourself) chicken liver "brownies" - the pups love those, if you'd want to bake for the oldsters...

[RidesAHaflinger]

And so the brave old dogs creak heroically out to the end of their driveway and manfully go "ROWF!" exactly once with their toothless old jaws. Avery sticks his nose in the air and takes exactly ONE sideways step. The dogs then retreat at leisure and Avery continues contentedly down the road, honor having been satisfied by all parties.

What a sweet story, WA. Thanks for the day-brightener. I'm the owner of young horses (that I expect to grow old with) and a geriatric gentleman Doberman who is trying hard to cling to his glory days when he could run like the wind and no squirrel in his yard was safe...:sadsmile:

[SLW]

Awww thanks DNJ!!!

I'm not really a dog person - anyone know what toothless ol' dawgs can eat, if one were of a mind to give them a Christmas pressie?? (Nice way to get to know the owner, I'm thinking, just drop by & tell this story...)

Canned dog food maybe?? You ought to see if you could get a photo of the hounds coming out to the road to fuss at Avery and give that with the hounds gifts.

[War Admiral]

Canned dog food maybe?? You ought to see if you could get a photo of the hounds coming out to the road to fuss at Avery and give that with the hounds gifts.

SLW, that is GENIUS!!!!!! Thank you for the wonderful idea!!!!! :yes:

And I loff the hot dogs idea too, bdj, thanks for that! These are redneck hounds, remember, so hot dogs are perfect! ;) Glad you like my Avery stories. I'm always afraid I'm going to get on people's nerves with all that braggin'.

RidesAHaffie - be sure to let your Old One know he is appreciated long-distance by the Old TB and me! :) We've decided we LIKE old dogs. :yes:

[bdj]

Don't you DARE stop posting Avery stories, War Admiral! I'll, I'll.... I don't know what I'll do if you stop posting them, but I'll be terribly upset if I don't get my Avery "fixes"...
You're just lucky I don't live nearer to GA, or else you'd have to put up with me wanting to come visit the grand old gent!

[DairyQueen2049]

Actually got the Avemaster out for a little walk down the road today.

The Grand One is SO epically spoiled nowadays that, on occasion, I stop at the end of the driveway and ask him which direction HE would like to drive today, just for a treat. (...And for the record, no, he never EVER says "back to the barn please!" If he did, I wouldn't grant him this privilege.)

God bless all our old dear ones! :yes:

Our dear old ones are the bestestest. :sadsmile: I miss my dear oldster Rita with whom I had much the same relationship: some trail days we would come to the fork and I'd say to her "what's YOUR pleasure today?" and she, much the same as Avery, would NEVER EVER choose home or back to the trailer.

In fact if you were lost and counting on her to take you back - bwa ha ha! Yokes on you!

Some of my mostest fondest memories of the trails she took me on.

Seh's been gone 1 yr and 4 days now. :cry:

I do miss her. The new horse is a silly young thing yet that has not clue one about making her own choices. The mere suggestion of such causes her heart failure. ("But YOU are the herd boss!! YOU must decide!!")

Many thanks for such a delightful story and good memories.

[nickers]

WA, you write so well - I love hearing your Avery stories! Thanks for sharing!

[War Admiral]

WA, you write so well - I love hearing your Avery stories! Thanks for sharing!

Aww thank you so much.

If you wouldn't mind giving a little jingle for him & me at the moment we could sure use it. :sadsmile:

[bdj]

We don't have a curb chain handy (Min's never gone in anything but a snaffle), and I'm at work, but will my slightly larger than necessary key collection suffice?

BIG Jingles (and positive thoughts) from the Eastern Shore!

[War Admiral]

Much obliged, bdj!!

[Drive NJ]

Jingles from NJ - but hoping you no longer need them

[War Admiral]

*sends DNJ a big huge hug* Thank you..... :sadsmile: Avery's in roaring good form but the company I was working for shut its doors and gave us all a grandiose 3 DAYS of severance pay :rolleyes: and I literally can't afford rent and board this month let alone food or utilities... All week long I've been thinking "Do I put him on the Giveaways Forum just to be sure he's safe..." Can't quite bring myself to do it yet, I'm a bitter-ender and would really LITERALLY rather end up in a Homeless Shelter than lose this horse... But I really, really, REALLY need a miracle if anyone has any spare ones about! :cry: My heart is just breaking and I don't know what to do. :cry:

Sorry to whine. I just can't keep my "game face" on any more. :( At least over here in the Driving forum not too many people will notice. :( Thanks for listening.

[olehossgal]

I just came back over here today; saw your latest post, War Admiral, and though I am new and basically a stranger to you all, my heart is with you in your time of trouble...and I send you my supporting thoughts and strong wishes for things to turn around for you....As a newbie, I am not sure what a 'jingle' is, but am thinking it must be something like the sound of carriage bells--as a sign of a wish for good results?
I do drive-minis only--though I've been driving for nearly 22 years, I came to 'real' driving late in life(have always trained my own, which I had done for MANY years with my riding horses, and went the 'breed show' route for quite a while), and do it alone, so have to stick with something 'safer'. Horses have been,and still are, my life and my joy-so I most certainly can relate to how you are feeling now-as I imagine most here also can...
My very best wishes to you,
Margo

[War Admiral]

Thanks so much Margo. Welcome to COTH BTW!

*has stopped crying now*

So here's a link to an explanation about COTH jingles. ;)
http://www.chronicleforums.com/Forum/showthread.php?t=35113&referrerid=103319

Got to run out and tuck the old man in bed now.

[bdj]

Oh, hell, that sucks, War Admiral!
Any hope that you can apply for unemployment? It doesn't cover much (in my experience, and yep, I've been there, twice), but it's better than nothing at all...
Seriously, feel free to whine - it's definitely a whine (and cry)- worthy thing to have happen.

I really wish I could offer something more than just moral support right now - if I had my own place, I'd be BEGGING you to let me put Avery up for a while... Min would probably enjoy having a buddy his own age (I think he sometimes finds 2yo Sully a pain in the youknowwhat...)
I'll be away from the computer for the rest of the evening, but if you want somebody to vent to, feel free to PM me - I'll make sure I get to the library tommorrow to check.

Jingling for good things for you, girl!

[Ashemont]

Sending loads of jingles from the gang in NC. Please check your PM's.

[pcwertb]

I also sent you a PM.

[War Admiral]

Thanks for all the kind words everyone, much appreciated. Blessings to those who PM'd me - you all rock... :yes: My goal is to take today off from worrying about it and just enjoy my beloved best friend the Ave-man and count the blessings of the day... Will PM you all back over the weekend... But didn't want to fail to express my gratitude!! :yes:

[pcwertb]

Hope you have a good weekend. You are in a place most of us dread to be and we wish you the very best. Let me know if we can help.

[Carriage Ponies]

War Admiral,
As most would agree here, ( we all enjoy ) and all believe you a very good writer! . Maybe it is the time to write more of your stories and follow a true talent.
I also have walked in your shoes and have gotten through it ! Write, it might help.....who knows you may find what you were meant to do . Send your stories to horse magazines , they just may publish them and send you a cheque !
If you need an illustrator just PM, maybe I can help !:yes:

Much jingles to you and Avery!!!

Carriage Ponies

[hobbyhorse23]

First of all, your story is wonderful. I too have an old man whom I regularly ask "Which way today, fellow?" and receive the most definitive answers and I admit I enjoy those rides above all others. My young one is quite willing to offer opinions when asked (and even when not asked) but like most kids needs to be reined in as he has NO idea of the consequences of his choices yet! :lol: Time will bring wisdom. :yes:

But then there was this other story- the one about a truly awful thing that has happened to you and how precarious your situation has become. That story made me feel very upset and wish there was something I could do from the opposite end of the country. I have nowhere to stash your horse (and shipping would cost more than either of us are currently making) but I sure wish I did. Instead I will go dig a curb chain out of the storage in which it rusts, clean it off a bit, and jingle it for you. Especially now that I finally know what that means! LOL

On a more helpful note, can you work off his board at the barn for this month? You might have time to now that you don't have a day job. :sadsmile:

[KellyS]

The original story made me smile--I, too, have an old and wise Thoroughbred gelding and he has his one spot (an old wagon with wheels to the side of the trail) on our trails that he always spooks, no matter what. It's his bit of fun and I think he likes to remind me that it is only by his good grace that he's such a dependable and honest mount. :)

If you need an illustrator just PM, maybe

And I'm an editor--always happy to look something over. :yes:

Also, if you need any horse care supplies, is there a local feed store that we can give a call? I'd be happy to help with something on that end (feed, hay, etc). I think you board at a co-op and it can be tough when you have to go out and buy your supplies. PM me if you feel more comfortable doing it that way.

[War Admiral]

Geeze, you guys, MAKE me cry on a Sunday morning!! :lol:

Y'all rock, you really do... Thank you so much. :sadsmile:

HobbyHorse - the thing I loff the most about Avery is his strict sense of quid pro quo. He understands he has to EARN his indulgences, and once he understands what the rules are for any particular huuuuuge favor I'm granting him (e.g. "I'll turn you loose in the big field around the barn provided you don't go out of my sight, don't pester passing horses, and come to me IMMEDIATELY when called"), he follows them impeccably. SUCH a good horse. I've GOT to find a way to keep him. :sadsmile:

I'll have to think about that book proposal... Actually I think the mad adventures of my old War Admiral gelding (he who jumped the judge and steward in their chairs on the outside course, among countless other wild and woolly escapades) make for a MUCH funnier story, which I actually have toyed with writing up from time to time... In any event it'll have to get back-burnered for the moment since the immediate problems have to get solved first! But Kelly and Carriage Ponies, you have definitely given me something to think about, and I am incredibly grateful to to both of you!! :yes:

Co-op unfortunately became full board when the barn management changed. :( (At least it's still cheap though!) The new BM has a full-time employee so not much chance of working off ALL my board but if I help with Special Projects I can get something of a break. I'm also *toying* with giving up my ammy status for a year, can't quite bring myself to do it... I'm about to go post on OC about how to put up electric fence... New BM has all the stuff to make temporary electric fencing for a couple more pastures, but neither she nor I know how to put it up... I'll get paid in board discounts for helping with that.

So right now I'm frantically dividing my time among my 2 part-time jobs (web content provision), trying to get more freelance work, putting stuff on Ebay, and revising resume (special thanks to Melissa for the help on that! COTHers are amazing!! :yes: ).

Avery and I did have a nice lazy day yesterday though. When I got to the barn I was feeling unambitious so I just brought him up and turned him loose to graze in the GOOD grass, parked a chair in the sun, and cleaned and oiled ALL my tack - harness, saddles, bridles, halters, leads and boots!

Many, many thanks to all y'all for the jingles... Keep 'em coming please!

Loff from Liz and Avery :)

[Drive NJ]

Geez WA... you go off-list for a day or so and look what happens. Jingling madly up here in NJ for you and the Ave-man and knowing you can make it work.

Don't know how it works with books, but also consider approaching magazines etc with proposals for a column. Most of the driving mags can't afford much, but perhaps some of the others can be more openhanded. Look into you local newspaper as well. There are several women up here making at least some kind of a living doing horse articles for local papers and magazines. You have a foot in so many horse worlds you'd at least get the facts right :yes: .

{{{{{HUGS}}}}} and many jingles from all of us up in NJ.

[SLW]

Oh War Admiral, what a pickle to deal with and I'm so sorry it happened. I am glad you had a nice lazy day w/ Avery yesterday and hope it helped your soul.

I completely understand your need to hang onto him. I'm in week #2 of rehabbing a pulled back muscle, at least that is Diagnosis A from the Doc. It's bothersome to not be able to ride or even have the strength to linger in the barn at feeding time but I'm fortunate in that I can see all my horses from the house. That does a lot to keep my head cool.

[War Admiral]

Hope you feel better soon, SLW. :yes:

Unfortunately I'm afraid I'm losing hope fast. So before I put him up on the Giveaways Forum, please let me ask if any of you know a KINDLY driving trainer who needs an absolutely bombproof lesson horse?? NOT AN AD, I will give him gratis to the right person, but would ideally loff for him to go to an experienced driver.

My heart is breaking. I never expected this to happen. I'm so scared. :cry:

[kt-rose]

a temporary agency. When my first husband decided he no longer wanted a wife and kids and up and left I was more than a little panicked about keeping house, children and horses. It was a very dark time and I did a lot of jobs I hated -- I cleaned houses, I did data entry, etc. -- but I got to keep all the things that mattered and eventually got a temp assignment that turned into a nice regular job and things turned around. At this time of year, temp agencies are desperate for people with any skills -- can you answer the phone? and it is a good time to get in with one.

Good luck and best wishes for a happy outcome!!!

[MySparrow]

So sorry, War Admiral! If it comes to it, we'll find space for Avery here, but I know things will turn around for you. I second the temp agency idea. Both John and I have had excellent luck there, and have wound up with good permanent jobs out of temporary situations. With your skills I know you'll get some interesting offers.

Have you rummaged around on Monster.com? I don't find it useful in terms of actual jobfinding, but it gives me ideas and a sense of what is wanted in the market place...

Jingles, jingles, jingles...

Dale

[bdj]

Jingling from the Eastern Shore!

(Hell, I bought a curb chain this weekend, just so I can jingle it for you and Avery! - So you can't give up yet! ;) )

[hobbyhorse23]

I third the temp agency idea! I did temp work for two years and loved it, finally got a great steady job out of it last year. It keeps the bills paid! At least the important ones like horse food. :lol: And it pays weekly so you'd get money fast.

Still jingling like a gypsy,
Leia

[War Admiral]

There is only one temp agency in town. I registered with them the last time I was unemployed. In 8 months they called me for a job exactly...

once. :rolleyes:

[citydog]

Many jingles, War Admiral.

I loved your initial story and was so sorry to read the rest and your post in giveaways.

I have to second (third? fourth?) what others have said: Write!!!

As far as being suddenly unemployed (three days notice?! B*****ds!!!), this is a good time of year for it, as there are more seasonal retail jobs available needing to be filled imediately.

All best thoughts and jingles to you from Vermont.

[DairyQueen2049]

WA - I have an idle 5 acre pasture in MI to offer you umm- err - Avery. And I am sure my brother would like another paying house guest. This set up cost me $250 monthly plus horse foods when I was in school.

What do you do, work size? I mean WORK WIZE. duh

Sending jingles.

[Carriage Ponies]

War Admiral,
Have faith, I have been there too.....
I lost my full time job , and had to rethink my life's direction..quickly!
I began to illustrate in earnest , freelancing where I could, until my illustrations were accepted by a national CDN horse magazine. Now I am able to do what I love, and keep my 3 pony cuties!. Had too...for my sanity!
The option of pasture board for Avery might be a good temporary solution, just until you can get your feet on the ground again. After you know he will be OK, you can rethink the situation. If you have horsey stories written , put them together, look what Reynard Ridge did ! Another great horsey writer who has success. You can do it ! Magazines do look for articles , they may not pay big bucks , but enough to get through the tight bits!

Don't give up yet, just grit your teeth , there are other solutions out there besides the giveaway column, it's tough but if you just gather your energy ....!
:yes:
We are all behind you! and Avery too!
Can you hear the jingles from Canada ....eh ???

Carriage Ponies

[DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"]

Oh, but we noticed. And we will never let you and avery slip through the cracks!

[Ashemont]

Liz,

Check your email. By now you should have a message from my friend. She is close and ready to help :)

Good luck!

[Reynard Ridge]

I've always wanted an Avery Moneigh! ;)

And WA, if it makes you feel any better, you and Avery are in my prayers.

[pony4me]

There's an Avery's Place thread over on Off Course. It's for an auction. Please donate and please bid.

Thanks!