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saitou_amaya
Feb. 21, 2013, 01:53 PM
So I'm currently writing a big paper for my human sexuality class about comprehensive sex ed versus abstinence-based ed. For me, it is obvious that we should be teaching kids comprehensive, but I'm not a parent. For a long time in the U.S. abstinence programs were being pushed for and funded the the government, although in the last couple years that is starting to change.

Are there any parents who think abstinence-based education should be taught? At what age do you think we should be teaching kids sexual education? I hope this isn't too risque a topic for COTH, but hey it actually is a class I'm taking and something still hotly debated by politicians!

Alagirl
Feb. 21, 2013, 01:59 PM
Sadly, there are too many parents who think that abstinence is the way to go, as if the kids would not know what to do with the equipment before mom or dad tells them....
The teen pregnancy numbers point the way: Countries with comprehensive education are far better off than the US.


At what age? They should know the basics pretty much in elementary school.
I know I heard the first mentioning in 5th grade...but by then I was already well educated, thanks to the curious nature of my older sister.

But I think once the prepubescent shyness sets in, it's actually too late. But I am not a child psychologist....
Reason being, because before that, you teach the facts of life, it's just that, facts, later you get the blushing and the giggles...<insert Beavis and Butthead: She said Penis, hehehehehe>


But then again, I grew up in a country where the nudy magazines were pretty much in the shelf above the comic books...and the leading youth magazine had a Q&A sect6ion with pictures, explaining the world. :eek::yes::lol:

purplnurpl
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:02 PM
abstinence is stupid.
I love sex.

I think schools should teach sex ed. Mine did when I was a wee Junior Higher.

actually, being a non Christian, I don't comprehend abstinence at all. It makes no sense to me.
Just don't get preggo and all is good to go.

Alagirl
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:06 PM
abstinence is stupid.
I love sex.

I think schools should teach sex ed. Mine did when I was a wee Junior Higher.

actually, being a non Christian, I don't comprehend abstinence at all. It makes no sense to me.
Just don't get preggo and all is good to go.

heathen! :lol:

but yeah...
the abstinence thing leads to weird things IMHO, people getting married, just so they can canoe...only to find out that they really don't mesh with each other....

KayBee
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:07 PM
I think you can promote abstinence and explain that it's a better choice until you're emotionally ready to have sex and able to distinguish who you trust enough to actually have sex with.

But to NOT teach about sex, sexuality, sexual diseases, and contraception? Calling it "shortsighted" is putting it exceedingly mildly.

Abstract of one of many articles on the subject.

http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1054139X07004260

bugsynskeeter
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:08 PM
Comprehensive sex ed. I am going to scream if I hear one more time that pulling out is an acceptable form of birth control.

When I was in high school (9th grade), we had a very in depth sex ed class. We went over EVERY kind of birth control available, effectiveness, how to use, etc. And yes, that included abstinence.

saitou_amaya
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:11 PM
abstinence is stupid.
I love sex.

I think schools should teach sex ed. Mine did when I was a wee Junior Higher.

actually, being a non Christian, I don't comprehend abstinence at all. It makes no sense to me.
Just don't get preggo and all is good to go.

I think you and I would get along just fine! :D

I went to a big public high school and comprehensive sex ed was taught, but I do have some friends who either went to smaller public schools or Catholic private schools and they got abstinence-only education! My biggest challenge writing this paper is I cannot even wrap my head around why you should teach abstinence-based ed in the first place! I can't write 6 or 7 pages about it because to me it isn't even a debate.

suzier444
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:12 PM
I favor comprehensive. Honestly, I think abstinence-based education is absurd and unrealistic, and to be completely honest I don't necessarily think abstinence/"waiting" is always the best or healthiest choice. But, if parents want to opt out of having comprehensive sex ed taught to their kids, I'd agree that they should have the right to do so.

Looking back on my own childhood, I'd say 5th or 6th grade is the right age.

dudleyc
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:15 PM
Why is it comprehensive education VERSUS abstinence? Couldn't comprehensive sex ed include alternatives to penetration including oral, touching and abstaining? And stress safe ways to engage in sexual alternatives if birth control is not available.

wendy
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:17 PM
why don't you do some real research instead of gathering opinions? there are lots of scientific studies on the topic. Go search on PubMed.

for example, a study of the impact of one kind of education program:






J Adolesc Health. 2004 Dec;35(6):442-52.

The "Safer Choices" intervention: its impact on the sexual behaviors of different subgroups of high school students.

Kirby DB, Baumler E, Coyle KK, Basen-Engquist K, Parcel GS, Harrist R, Banspach SW.


Source

Department of Research, ETR Associates, Scotts Valley, CA 95066-4200, USA. dougk@etr.org


Abstract


PURPOSE:

To measure the relative impact of a school-based human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)-, sexually transmitted disease (STD)-, and pregnancy-prevention intervention on sexual risk-taking behaviors of different subgroups of students.

METHODS:

Twenty schools were randomly assigned to receive Safer Choices or a standard knowledge-based HIV-education program. Safer Choices was designed to reduce unprotected sex by delaying initiation of sex, reducing its frequency, or increasing condom use. Its five components included: school organization, an intensive curriculum with staff development, peer resources and school environment, parent education, and school-community linkages. A total of 3869 9th-grade students were tracked for 31 months. Results are presented for initiation of sex, frequency of unprotected sex, number of unprotected sexual partners, condom use, and contraceptive use. These results are presented separately by gender, race/ethnicity, prior sexual experience, and prior sexual risk-taking. Statistical analyses included multilevel, repeated measures logistic and Poisson regression models.

RESULTS:

Safer Choices had one or more positive behavioral effects on all subgroups. On four outcomes that could be affected by condom use, it had a greater impact on males than on females. It had greater effects on Hispanics, including a delay in sexual activity, than on other racial/ethnic groups. Its greatest overall effect was an increase in condom use among students who had engaged in unprotected sex before the intervention.

CONCLUSIONS:

Safer Choices reduced one or more measures of sexual risk taking over 31 months among all groups of youth, and was especially effective with males, Hispanics, and youth who engaged in unprotected sex and thus were at higher risk for HIV, other STD infections and pregnancy.


PMID: 15581523 [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE]

Alagirl
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:22 PM
Why is it comprehensive education VERSUS abstinence? Couldn't comprehensive sex ed include alternatives to penetration including oral, touching and abstaining? And stress safe ways to engage in sexual alternatives if birth control is not available.

comprehensive includes abstinence, yes.

But the prevailing idea of some people is to tell the kids 'just say no' and to keep the knees together.

IMHO that leads to a couple of problems:
Like under age drinking, it becomes more interesting to go out and do it...after all, everybody does it, why shouldn't I.

Sex becomes that huge deal, at the same time that shameful deed...and the problem is perpetuated down the line, with parents not being able to talk about it...

Interesting conversation between a 15 yo guy and the librarian about the sex ed book in the YA section...He thought it should not be there....where as the librarian told him how many requests she had for books on you-know-what and she then has to guess which what, and point them into the direction...
yeah, buddy, not all kids are blessed with parents you can ask those questions....

saitou_amaya
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:22 PM
I have done a lot of research and gathered many peer-reviews articles and research. I'm actually halfway done with the paper, I was just snowed in and curious about the opinions of others since as a health science major I am kind of biased.

And dudlyc--comprehensive sex ed typically includes abstinence as an opinion. That's why it is COMPREHENSIVE. It includes information on a broad range of sexual option and topics.

wireweiners
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:22 PM
As the parent of a daughter and I suppose this would apply to boys also, I am teaching her that it is better to wait to have sex until she is emotionally mature enough to deal with it and has a partner that she is at least somewhat committed to and is committed to her. I'm trying to teach her to have enough self respect not to just have sex with any male that shows some interest in her and that having sex with a boy isn't a way to get him to like you. But I am a realist enough to talk with her about birth control, diseases, etc. I know she doesn't tell me everything but we do talk about a lot. I wouldn't be pleased if she began a sexual relationship at 16 but I wouldn't freak out either. I'd rather get her on birth control than have a teen with a baby. I've told her that she is too young to raise a child and I'm too old.

We live in the country and have had cows, horses, dogs, etc. so she learned the mechanics of sex and all the parts when she was quite young. When she approached puberty, we had the "your body is changing" talk. I started talking to her about the emotional side to sex when she was around 13. I would not have a problem with a comprehensive approach to sex ed. I think abstinence only isn't realistic.

Frizzle
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:23 PM
My mom gave me "the talk" when I was somehwere around 4 or 5, right when I started asking questions. As someone else said, I think it's actually EASIER for both parents and kids, because there is less embarassment all around. I was still learning about the world and it was just, "OK, that makes sense," and it didn't upset/embarass me in the least. She told me all the proper names, etc., no cutesy stuff or dumbing it down.

In school, I believe we had sex ed in the sixth grade, although I don't recall them talking specifically about each birth control method (that would have been nice/helpful, but I went to a Catholic school :lol:). I do think the 6th grade is a little late, based on the fact that girls are getting their periods earlier and kids are having sex earlier. Can you imagine gtting your period as a 4th or 5th grader and having no idea what it is? That would be terrifying.

So, yes, another vote for comprehensive sex ed! The whole "just don't do it" thing has never worked. Ya can't fight biology--you can try, but you won't win.

Canaqua
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:29 PM
My preference is for comprehensive...which can, and should, include abstinence. Abstinence as an option for birth control, disease avoidance and emotional self-protection. But, also give, in detail, all the other options too!!

My boys have been late bloomers. One is 22 and one is 10. They were both uninterested in sex until they started hearing about it from their friends (usually friends with older siblings)...around age 8. Of course, they got TONS of misinformation, so I had to set them straight. The problem was that they didn't believe me when I told them the truth about how babies are made. They both said, "no way", "that can't be", "OMG!". They just weren't ready, but I couldn't have them going around with what their friends told them.

22 year old came back to me at about age 10 and told me that he now believed me and wanted to hear a bit more ;). 10 year old is still in the denial stage. He does regularly ask me about the veracity of something one of his peers said, but doesn't want DETAILED discussion of the truth yet.

I think they cover it in school here in 6th or 7th grade, but he'll likely have a clue, from our continued, gradual, what he's ready for when he's ready for it, discussion, before that.

Donkerbruin
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:31 PM
The majority of my sex ed was in middle school, and I would say it was a mixture of comprehensive education and abstinence only. We learned about what the different methods of birth control were, but we weren't told how to use them. I knew that a condom was a thing that existed, but if I had been in a position to use one, I almost certainly would have done it wrong.

Abstinence was always touted as the absolute best method of birth control and STD prevention (and, well, I guess it is). That was easy for me to practice because I knew well enough how NOT to have sex.

I remember there always being a "sex is bad" undertone. Nobody explicitly said "You will get pregnant, get AIDS and have no friends if you have sex before marriage" but that was always the feeling that I had. Probably explains why I didn't go on my first canoeing excursion until age 20. :D

Canaqua
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:35 PM
I went to an all girls school and we had "sex ed" as part of our biology curriculum in 7th grade. This was back in the early '70s. The teacher had all kinds of birth control on hand and passed them around so we could see what they looked like. She had us practice putting condoms on bananas!! Most of us were extremely embarrassed. It didn't lead to people having sex...there were only 45 girls in my graduating class, but to the very best of my knowledge (girls bragged about their usually VERY limited sexual exploits), only 2 were not virgins at high school graduation. Of course, the lack of easily available boys probably helped with that ;).

hrford
Feb. 21, 2013, 02:50 PM
As a parent to a 9 and 4 year old, we talk about sex from the first time they ask any questions. Obviously in an age appropriate manner.

I was raised in one of those ultra-religous, sex is horrible unless you are married.

The church I grew up in there were 8 teenage girls together, 7 of us have gotten pregnant before marriage! I was the latest as I didn't get pregnant until I was in my mid 20's everyone else was early 20's or a teenager when they did! Anecdotal yes, but I'm not risking it with my kids!

I will definitely talk to them about being mature, and never sleeping with anyone just so they'll stick around, but the mechanics, and how you don't get a disease and birth control will always be a priority. For my son I will also make clear that he holds just as much responsibility for stopping pregnancy as the girl does!

Peggy
Feb. 21, 2013, 03:07 PM
The one thing that stands out from all the various sex ed classes and sessions is the teacher who had a fellow student (who had gotten pregnant and chose to raise the baby) talk to us and answer questions. This included questions about how it had affected her relationship with the father and what she planned to do after high school, plus the logistics of raising a child while going to school. It was the sort of experience that made you think about things on your own afterwards and come to your own decisions and conclusions.

Petstorejunkie
Feb. 21, 2013, 05:51 PM
I had sex ed in middle and highschool. Nothing like photos of herpes outbreaks to encourage teens to keep their pants on!!! I think it's made me a safer adult too.
Sex education is about reproductive organs, hormones and disease, not sex positions.

dani0303
Feb. 21, 2013, 06:04 PM
I had sex ed in 6th grade. They split the boys and girl up. It was a room full of giggling 12yos but in the end, a lot of it stuck. My parents were also pretty open with discussing sex. Abstinence was taught as an alternative to sex but even our health teachers knew that wasn't really an option with teenagers ;)

North Dakota
Feb. 21, 2013, 06:05 PM
I live in Canada, but we started sex ed at the private school I went to in grade 4, maybe 5? but I'm pretty sure grade 4. Then when my family moved and switched to a public school(in grade 6) we didn't have sex ed again until grade 7. It was much more awkward in grade 7 than in grade 4!

We did some sex ed stuff in gym class in grade 9, but it wasn't a huge amount, I think we talked more about STDs and stuff, and not as much about birth control. I think looking back that my teacher was trying to teach us more, but a good amount of the class wouldn't stop talking and commenting for more than 2 minutes, so she spent more time dealing with them. Ironically, a lot of those girls were pregnant in high school, and now have one if not more kids.....

Hippolyta
Feb. 21, 2013, 09:06 PM
This:

why don't you do some real research instead of gathering opinions? there are lots of scientific studies on the topic. Go search on PubMed.

for example, a study of the impact of one kind of education program:






J Adolesc Health. 2004 Dec;35(6):442-52.

The "Safer Choices" intervention: its impact on the sexual behaviors of different subgroups of high school students.

Kirby DB, Baumler E, Coyle KK, Basen-Engquist K, Parcel GS, Harrist R, Banspach SW.


Source

Department of Research, ETR Associates, Scotts Valley, CA 95066-4200, USA. dougk@etr.org


Abstract


PURPOSE:

To measure the relative impact of a school-based human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)-, sexually transmitted disease (STD)-, and pregnancy-prevention intervention on sexual risk-taking behaviors of different subgroups of students.

METHODS:

Twenty schools were randomly assigned to receive Safer Choices or a standard knowledge-based HIV-education program. Safer Choices was designed to reduce unprotected sex by delaying initiation of sex, reducing its frequency, or increasing condom use. Its five components included: school organization, an intensive curriculum with staff development, peer resources and school environment, parent education, and school-community linkages. A total of 3869 9th-grade students were tracked for 31 months. Results are presented for initiation of sex, frequency of unprotected sex, number of unprotected sexual partners, condom use, and contraceptive use. These results are presented separately by gender, race/ethnicity, prior sexual experience, and prior sexual risk-taking. Statistical analyses included multilevel, repeated measures logistic and Poisson regression models.

RESULTS:

Safer Choices had one or more positive behavioral effects on all subgroups. On four outcomes that could be affected by condom use, it had a greater impact on males than on females. It had greater effects on Hispanics, including a delay in sexual activity, than on other racial/ethnic groups. Its greatest overall effect was an increase in condom use among students who had engaged in unprotected sex before the intervention.

CONCLUSIONS:

Safer Choices reduced one or more measures of sexual risk taking over 31 months among all groups of youth, and was especially effective with males, Hispanics, and youth who engaged in unprotected sex and thus were at higher risk for HIV, other STD infections and pregnancy.


PMID: 15581523 [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE]

I teach college anat/phys.

You would DIE if you could see what some of these students either don't know or misunderstand.
Most of my younger students are from "good" suburban HS, including one rated #1 something something.

I also have many adult students (older than traditional college age) & many of them aren't much better.

STD rates in teens are going thru the roof. They pretty much all have chlamydia. Ok, not all, but...ick.

Frank B
Feb. 21, 2013, 09:17 PM
We had 9th grade sex ed classes back in the '50s, complete with films. I was the projectionist, which got kinda tricky during the girl's classes. They were also incorporated in with the 10th grade biology classes.

Abstinence is fine in theory, but when those raging teen-age hormones kick in, problems abound, especially the way sex is pushed by just about every media hearthrob and Madison Avenue agent.

Frizzle
Feb. 21, 2013, 09:36 PM
I had sex ed in middle and highschool. Nothing like photos of herpes outbreaks to encourage teens to keep their pants on!!! I think it's made me a safer adult too.


The thing that really disturbed my into keeping my knees together was the childbirth video we had to watch in my health class freshman year. It was a side view, but still disturbing on so many levels! I did not have sex in HS, largely due to that video, lol.

loshad
Feb. 21, 2013, 09:45 PM
The thing that really disturbed my into keeping my knees together was the childbirth video we had to watch in my health class freshman year. It was a side view, but still disturbing on so many levels! I did not have sex in HS, largely due to that video, lol.

Oh, dear God, yes. I still remember that and it's been mumblemumble years. We got the full on frontal view.

Chall
Feb. 21, 2013, 11:18 PM
In the dark ages we got a biology class on sex, with classes split up by gender. It went in on ear and out the other.
In tenth grade, mixed gender we got the drugs and sex class, first year it was mandated by the state. I learned a lot (mostly omg the diseases you can get) and a lot about drugs (with comments from the druggie kids in the back of the class.

With aids and herpes I think it should be taught.
Before all this though, my sister slipped dr. Joyce brothers"everything you wanted to know about sex but were afraid to ask". That was a good book for me.

kateh
Feb. 21, 2013, 11:38 PM
I teach college anat/phys.

You would DIE if you could see what some of these students either don't know or misunderstand.
Most of my younger students are from "good" suburban HS, including one rated #1 something something.

I also have many adult students (older than traditional college age) & many of them aren't much better.

STD rates in teens are going thru the roof. They pretty much all have chlamydia. Ok, not all, but...ick.

I TA an intro bio class geared towards bio/health sciences majors. A recent quiz that made me just about keel over and die:

Quiz Question: This virus is spread by mosquito bites (Word bank provided, answer was West Nile)
Student's Answer: HIV

:eek::dead: God help us all.

Levade
Feb. 21, 2013, 11:50 PM
Honestly, we all need to say thank you to Planned Parenthood for being there for teens, at least, and making accurate information and all forms of birth control readily available. Without them, I think there might've been a 90% pregnancy rate through high school. Middle-school sex ed, on the other hand? Absolutely laughable. They put so much time and money into ONLY trying to convince us not to have sex! Plays, teen-parent speakers, movies, surveys, etc. Actual information = zero. I depended on self-education, and Planned Parenthood was also always a great resource. But my first REAL "sex-ed" was Human Sexuality as a freshman in college. One of the best, most informative, and practically useful classes I've ever taken. Now, I'm a pro ;)

Hippolyta
Feb. 21, 2013, 11:57 PM
I have said for years that I would cut teenage pregnancy & STD rates by 99% if I was able to do posters:

"these are your genitals on _____" fill in with syphilis lesions, herpes, genital warts, etc.

Coreene
Feb. 21, 2013, 11:58 PM
Look at Holland's teen pregnancy rate compared to the US. Because BC is readily available, not some dirty secret.

horsehand
Feb. 22, 2013, 12:00 AM
As the parent of a daughter and I suppose this would apply to boys also, I am teaching her that it is better to wait to have sex until she is emotionally mature enough to deal with it and has a partner that she is at least somewhat committed to and is committed to her. I'm trying to teach her to have enough self respect not to just have sex with any male that shows some interest in her and that having sex with a boy isn't a way to get him to like you. But I am a realist enough to talk with her about birth control, diseases, etc. I know she doesn't tell me everything but we do talk about a lot. I wouldn't be pleased if she began a sexual relationship at 16 but I wouldn't freak out either. I'd rather get her on birth control than have a teen with a baby. I've told her that she is too young to raise a child and I'm too old.

We live in the country and have had cows, horses, dogs, etc. so she learned the mechanics of sex and all the parts when she was quite young. When she approached puberty, we had the "your body is changing" talk. I started talking to her about the emotional side to sex when she was around 13. I would not have a problem with a comprehensive approach to sex ed. I think abstinence only isn't realistic.

Imagine that! A parent taking responsibility for educating their own kids. Why is it up to the schools in the first place?

Alagirl
Feb. 22, 2013, 12:22 AM
Imagine that! A parent taking responsibility for educating their own kids. Why is it up to the schools in the first place?

because too many parents prefer the 'pinch your knees together' method.

it is clearly not working and not in society's best interest.
Unless of course it's MTV and their audience...

Schune
Feb. 22, 2013, 09:14 AM
Imagine that! A parent taking responsibility for educating their own kids. Why is it up to the schools in the first place?

Because, sadly, a good percentage of parents (read: morons) are seriously lacking when it comes to their own kids and sex education. They believe "Just don't" is the fool-proof way to go. The statistics say otherwise.

I have a fervent hate against abstinence-only education. It started early when I got in trouble in a middle school sex seminar - the speaker was an abstinence promoter and I got on his nerves when I refuted his statement that the only way to prevent pregnancy was to not have sex. Got me a trip to the office and my mother a little steamed at the administration when they suggested I take the rest of the afternoon off.

I did get ice cream and a proud parent speech, though :lol:

trubandloki
Feb. 22, 2013, 09:26 AM
This:


I teach college anat/phys.

You would DIE if you could see what some of these students either don't know or misunderstand.
Most of my younger students are from "good" suburban HS, including one rated #1 something something.


This might be more the students not learning not as much the school not teaching.
Like so many things taught in schools, you can not make them listen and retain, even more so if they already have in their heads what they think is the correct answer.


Add me to the group that does not see why it has to be either or. Comprehensive sex ed should include a discussion about abstinence and how it is the only truly 100% affective form of birth control.

skykingismybaby1
Feb. 22, 2013, 09:39 AM
I went to an all girls Catholic High School in the early seventies.

My mother supplied me with info all along so I never had an AHA moment regarding sex, but when I was a freshman, due to some scheduleling nightmare, I had sex ed (morality and ethics) in religion class first thing in the morning.

Then I had sex ed in Biology (mechanics and reproduction) and the afternoon capped off with Phys Ed (nasties and diseases).

I was sooo bored with sex and a virgin til 18.

Alagirl
Feb. 22, 2013, 09:45 AM
I went to an all girls Catholic High School in the early seventies.

My mother supplied me with info all along so I never had an AHA moment regarding sex, but when I was a freshman, due to some scheduleling nightmare, I had sex ed (morality and ethics) in religion class first thing in the morning.

Then I had sex ed in Biology (mechanics and reproduction) and the afternoon capped off with Phys Ed (nasties and diseases).

I was sooo bored with sex and a virgin til 18.

apparently comprehensive sex ed works far better than 'uuhh no, don't do it'
:lol:

Chall
Feb. 22, 2013, 10:05 AM
Birth rates are dropping in the US, but especially in the Hispanic community, 6% (which was considered a huge drop).
The factor cited in that article was the economy. So, perhaps it's factors other than just sex education that effect teen and adult pregnancies.

SAcres
Feb. 22, 2013, 10:47 AM
My hs taught comprehensive, and I'm so grateful they did! It actually started back in elementary school, with the boys in one room and the girls in another...very interesting class. ;)

We had to take health every year from grade 6-12, and every year there would be a sex ed. unit, where things got more...comprehensive. In our junior year they had a guest speaker come in who was HIV+, that was an interesting experience as well, it taught me a lot. I can't think of anything that wasn't covered in my health classes, we were able to ask questions, talk about sex in an open manner, and overall just not feel judged, which is crazy considering I went to a public high school.

It of course didn't stop teen pregnancies, but there were maybe one or two girls per year getting pregnant, which I know is a lot lower than some schools. It was NOT the norm to see pregnant girls walking the halls or anything like that.

I can't remember ever having a teacher say sex was bad, or should only happen in a marriage. It was just along the lines of, not until you're ready, never feel pressured stuff.

I'm grateful of my school's chosen sex ed. curriculum.

Alagirl
Feb. 22, 2013, 11:00 AM
Birth rates are dropping in the US, but especially in the Hispanic community, 6% (which was considered a huge drop).
The factor cited in that article was the economy. So, perhaps it's factors other than just sex education that effect teen and adult pregnancies.

Not sure how they measure the community...

but a lot of the illegals have returned to their home countries from what I have been told...bad economy and crazy immigration laws in some states...that cuts into the birth rate as well, plus it has been proven, when education goes up, birth rates drop....

Mosey_2003
Feb. 22, 2013, 11:10 AM
We had it starting in 5th grade, they separated genders and we got the menstruation talk and demonstrations, no clue what the boys got. We were separated each year for a little more 6th and 7th grades, then the full on bio week together in 8th grade. Freshman health was basically diseases and infections, health class was mandatory. We still had pregnancies and a particularly memorable herpes incident. This NEEDS to be taught in the home, I still wish my mother would've plucked up and said more than, "Don't do anything without a ring and don't ever put that dirty thing in your mouth" :lol: I think there should be an *emphasis* on abstinence and the many, many reasons it's the best idea, but only teaching abstinence is certainly dangerous.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 11:27 AM
abstinence is stupid.
I love sex.

I think schools should teach sex ed. Mine did when I was a wee Junior Higher.

actually, being a non Christian, I don't comprehend abstinence at all. It makes no sense to me.
Just don't get preggo and all is good to go.

My boyfriend and I are talking about "sex" and both of us cant drive so we rely on our parents and they are "cool" with it but they have to talk to each other before "we do it". ughhhh!!!

arktos19
Feb. 22, 2013, 11:28 AM
Imagine that! A parent taking responsibility for educating their own kids. Why is it up to the schools in the first place?

Hahaha - sevearal years ago my son was so horrified when I tried to have "the talk" with him I had to abandon my plans and let the school deal with it!!! :eek:

He actually asked me to write a letter to get him excused but I refused. ;)

Lady Eboshi
Feb. 22, 2013, 11:33 AM
We had it starting in 5th grade, they separated genders and we got the menstruation talk and demonstrations, no clue what the boys got. We were separated each year for a little more 6th and 7th grades, then the full on bio week together in 8th grade. Freshman health was basically diseases and infections, health class was mandatory. We still had pregnancies and a particularly memorable herpes incident. This NEEDS to be taught in the home, I still wish my mother would've plucked up and said more than, "Don't do anything without a ring and don't ever put that dirty thing in your mouth" :lol: I think there should be an *emphasis* on abstinence and the many, many reasons it's the best idea, but only teaching abstinence is certainly dangerous.

Like this when I was growing up, plenty on the mechanics and an emphasis on all the hideous, life-destroying things that could happen to you. Looking back, the funny part was they never, ever mentioned all the reasons a teen might be tempted to engage in such stuff to begin with. Nobody EVER mentioned that the activity is, or should be, pleasurable.

Leading most of us "nice" girls (read, no experience) to the conclusion that one would have to want a baby VERY BADLY to do something so dangerous and disgusting! :D

Mosey_2003
Feb. 22, 2013, 11:35 AM
Ours, as far as I can remember (I'm 28 now) was very clinical, I don't remember any shaming or negativity, really. It would have been better in my opinion if there had even been like a handout or something to send our parents about discussing WHY abstinence is a good idea, besides avoiding pregnancy and STD's. I had a very malformed idea of it for many years until the lightbulb came on.

AffirmedHope
Feb. 22, 2013, 01:07 PM
My boyfriend and I are talking about "sex" and both of us cant drive so we rely on our parents and they are "cool" with it but they have to talk to each other before "we do it". ughhhh!!!

:eek:

SAcres
Feb. 22, 2013, 01:09 PM
My boyfriend and I are talking about "sex" and both of us cant drive so we rely on our parents and they are "cool" with it but they have to talk to each other before "we do it". ughhhh!!!

Oh dear...

wireweiners
Feb. 22, 2013, 04:48 PM
The thing that really disturbed my into keeping my knees together was the childbirth video we had to watch in my health class freshman year. It was a side view, but still disturbing on so many levels! I did not have sex in HS, largely due to that video, lol.

When my daughter was quite young, one of her friends' mother was pregnant. So one day while we were in the car, DD asks, "Momma, how is that baby going to get out of X's mom's tummy?" I explained that there was a special hole in the mommy's private area for the baby to come out. DD's eyes got big and she said, "Boy, that thing must really stretch!"

Alagirl
Feb. 22, 2013, 04:49 PM
When my daughter was quite young, one of her friends' mother was pregnant. So one day while we were in the car, DD asks, "Momma, how is that baby going to get out of X's mom's tummy?" I explained that there was a special hole in the mommy's private area for the baby to come out. DD's eyes got big and she said, "Boy, that thing must really stretch!"

:lol:
yep

LexInVA
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:00 PM
:eek:

I think we need to create a drinking game.

bugsynskeeter
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:06 PM
I think we need to create a drinking game.

I'm in!

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:10 PM
Im just stateing a fact that ppl with LD's can have sex also we are just like any of you.

wireweiners
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:14 PM
Im justing a fact that ppl with LD's can have sex also we are just like any of you.

If you are for real, then I certainly hope you are using protection. You don't need to be breeding.

Alagirl
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:15 PM
If you are for real, then I certainly hope you are using protection. You don't need to be breeding.

oooookaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

that was not the nicest thing to say......

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:16 PM
If you are for real, then I certainly hope you are using protection. You don't need to be breeding.

yeah thats for sure. :)

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:17 PM
oooookaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

that was not the nicest thing to say......\

It's alright im used to it. I get made fun of all the time so it's not anything different.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:20 PM
ONE more thing is that we are just "talking" about this whole thing His parents and my mom.

skykingismybaby1
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:22 PM
Hi Tiffany, if you take advice from an old lady I suggest that if you are thinking about it - just think some more.

I also think it is a good idea that both sets of parents are thinking about it too.

Good luck!

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:25 PM
Hi Tiffany, if you take advice from an old lady I suggest that if you are thinking about it - just think some more.

I also think it is a good idea that both sets of parents are thinking about it too.

Good luck!

Thank you :)

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:28 PM
dad wants me to get my tubes cut and tied before so. mom is like BC or tubes. His parents are like Tubes.

but I dunno I mean I want to but I dont. It's weird haveing your parents involved and you have to depend on them to get you around. (sighs).

wireweiners
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:34 PM
oooookaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

that was not the nicest thing to say......
You're right. It wasn't very nice but I've been working for CPS for 19 years this week and I've seen what happens and cleaned up the messes of people who have kids who shouldn't have had them. Makes me a little snarky at times.

skykingismybaby1
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:37 PM
dad wants me to get my tubes cut and tied before so. mom is like BC or tubes. His parents are like Tubes.

but I dunno I mean I want to but I dont. It's weird haveing your parents involved and you have to depend on them to get you around. (sighs).

Sometimes situations are weird........if you are not sure, then don't. Wait until you are sure.

LexInVA
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:37 PM
You're right. It wasn't very nice but I've been working for CPS for 19 years this week and I've seen what happens and cleaned up the messes of people who have kids who shouldn't have had them. Makes me a little snarky at times.

I second it. I too have seen first-hand through my volunteer work what happens when the impaired breed - either with each other or with someone who isn't as a result of sexual abuse - and it's not pretty. There's a care facility in my area where disabled/impaired children are dumped by families after a certain age and the quality of life that they get is not great.

Bristol Bay
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:38 PM
Of the promise ring, abstinence-only faction in my family, there are three generations of unplanned pregnancies. My sister was a great-grandma at 64.

So in my view, there needs to be a better argument against teen pregnancy than you're not supposed to be having sex.

skykingismybaby1
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:41 PM
Tiffany seems to be giving this decision a lot more consideration than most people do.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:41 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbxbS7aEl04
me.

AffirmedHope
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:42 PM
How old are you? No self respecting doctor is going to tie the tubes of a teenager.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:42 PM
Tiffany seems to be giving this decision a lot more consideration than most people do.

I think i have to talk more.... about it. I dunno maybe i'll just wait till later down the road.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:43 PM
How old are you? No self respecting doctor is going to tie the tubes of a teenager.

30 yrs old.

Bristol Bay
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:44 PM
You're right. It wasn't very nice but I've been working for CPS for 19 years this week and I've seen what happens and cleaned up the messes of people who have kids who shouldn't have had them. Makes me a little snarky at times.

With your lack of compassion, you might want to think twice about breeding as well.

Tiffany, it's your body. Take charge of it. If you want a sex life but don't want to worry about pregnancy, join the club. It's great not having to worry about BC or its side effects. Or remembering to take it.:)

AffirmedHope
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:45 PM
30 yrs old.

Ah my bad. Wasn't there someone else with a similar name on this board that I could have sworn was in their teens? But I doubt you can get your tubes tied anyway most doctors only do it after a women already has a baby, since so many people regret it.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:45 PM
I dont WANT to breed.

Tiffany01
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:47 PM
I have alot of thinking to do before hand guys.

wireweiners
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:53 PM
With your lack of compassion, you might want to think twice about breeding as well.

Tiffany, it's your body. Take charge of it. If you want a sex life but don't want to worry about pregnancy, join the club. It's great not having to worry about BC or its side effects. Or remembering to take it.:)

Actually I didn't breed. My daughter was adopted from foster care. Her bio-parents are meth addicts. Try doing what I do for 19 years without getting a little hardened and jaded. I hold the Arkansas state record for number of termination of parental rights from a single parent - 10 and Texas took 8 kids from this mom before she moved to Arkansas. Rumor has it she is pregnant with number 19. The office joke is she needs her own reality show, 19 Crack Babies and Counting. Let's not forget the mothers who are MR and just simply lack the mental capacity to raise a child without harming it. It's really sad to keep taking child after child because they just can't be taught how to take care of a baby. Actually I have lots of compassion, it's just mostly for the kids.

Martha Drum
Feb. 22, 2013, 05:56 PM
From reading all the posts, I believe Tiffany01 is a thirty-year old whose learning/developmental and/or physical differences prevent her from being able to drive. Her boyfriend appears to have similar circumstances. Clearly, from her posts, she is not so mentally challenged as to be unable to consider the pros and cons of a sexual relationship and its ramifications. In fact, one might argue in this department, she is ahead of some prominent, "non-impaired" folks (Strom Thurmond, Eliot Spitzer, Mark Sanford hmm hmm hmm hmm hmm).

Good on you, Tiffany. Sounds like you both have supportive families, and can go forward continuing your discussions. I would think a doctor would be willing to consider tubal ligation, as part of a discussion about many birth control options for you. I think your voice in this discussion is important.

MMacallister
Feb. 22, 2013, 06:02 PM
I feel oddly qualified to reply to this thread. We had a more absitince based type thing although they did cover a few forms of birth control, but I did grow up in a very strict, sex is bad type, keep a dime between your knees type of household. (I wasn't allowed to watch the golden girls because of to much sexual content)

I also had a baby when I was 15. I was curious, believed stupid crap and really did not have enough unbiased information.