View Full Version : I ran over the Easter Bunny!!!! (not for the squeamish)

Apr. 11, 2001, 07:15 AM
Oh my God, I have never killed anything. Not so much as a bug. On purpose, anyway. So I was driving to the barn last night, blissfully dreaming of whether the mare was going to toss me or not, when a little bunny ran right in front of me. With oncoming traffic, I couldn't swerve, I braked a little, but it was instantly apparent bunny wouldn't make it.

I heard a Bang! then saw fur fly over the hood. I screamed, managed to keep the car on the road, and burst into tears (ok, I love bunnies). So I look in the rear view mirror to see what damage I had done, and nothing. I continued driving to the barn, upset, knowing I was a bunny murderer. So I get to the barn and figure I should check the front of my car for damage when lo and behold the ENTIRE bunny is plastered against my left headlight. If it hadn't been real, it would have been funny. It was hanging on to the headlight with it's front paws. I screamed, literally, and went into the barn.

It took me 20 minutes to find someone willing to go remove it. My ride was ruined, how can one concentrate when one has just murdered an innocent bunny??? My headlight is smashed to pieces. I called my husband (a hunter) who says "yah?...Can you bring it home?"


I feel terrible. And four days before Easter. I tell ya, the drive to the barn is getting more and more dangerous.....

Apr. 11, 2001, 07:15 AM
Oh my God, I have never killed anything. Not so much as a bug. On purpose, anyway. So I was driving to the barn last night, blissfully dreaming of whether the mare was going to toss me or not, when a little bunny ran right in front of me. With oncoming traffic, I couldn't swerve, I braked a little, but it was instantly apparent bunny wouldn't make it.

I heard a Bang! then saw fur fly over the hood. I screamed, managed to keep the car on the road, and burst into tears (ok, I love bunnies). So I look in the rear view mirror to see what damage I had done, and nothing. I continued driving to the barn, upset, knowing I was a bunny murderer. So I get to the barn and figure I should check the front of my car for damage when lo and behold the ENTIRE bunny is plastered against my left headlight. If it hadn't been real, it would have been funny. It was hanging on to the headlight with it's front paws. I screamed, literally, and went into the barn.

It took me 20 minutes to find someone willing to go remove it. My ride was ruined, how can one concentrate when one has just murdered an innocent bunny??? My headlight is smashed to pieces. I called my husband (a hunter) who says "yah?...Can you bring it home?"


I feel terrible. And four days before Easter. I tell ya, the drive to the barn is getting more and more dangerous.....

Apr. 11, 2001, 07:20 AM
Just be thankful it wasn't a deer. You would have had more than a smashed headlight and probably wouldn't have been able to drive home. Hubby would have been thrilled tho.

PS. This response is NOT meant to be funny or sarcastic.


lil orphan annie
Apr. 11, 2001, 07:27 AM
never swerve for small animals. Rather a dead bunny than a dead person.

But still, it is soooo upsetting, I know.

Worthy, we know you did not intentionally commit bunnycide. If it makes you feel better, maybe the bunny wanted to die, I mean, maybe his wife left him for a younger bunny, he was in debt up to his eyeballs, he was stealing from other bunnies to support his carrot habit etc. It may have been for the best....

Apr. 11, 2001, 07:38 AM
...I know I should feel sorry for the bunny....but thanks for the laugh!

Were you able to strip the bunny and get some good Easter candy off of him? We could all get on a virtual sugar high if you'd like to share some jelly beans!

Apr. 11, 2001, 07:42 AM
Oh, Worthy, so sorry to hear about your bunny incident. Like VTrider, don't mean to giggle, but it is amusing.

Apr. 11, 2001, 07:59 AM
Thank you all for your well wishes.

Msj, yes, you are absolutely right that I am lucky it was not a deer.
Or worse yet, a moose...my Dad lives in Northern Ontario and trust me, if you hit one, you will die, your vehicle will be totalled, and the moose will get up and walk away.

I do believe bunny had some sort of suicidal thoughts. He ran out into 4 lanes of traffic, all going well over 80, (kilometres, that is), and his position (spread-eagled, face first) could only mean a death wish.

Hubby has my car today. He has promised to remove the fur, and order me a new headlight.

While I was extremely distraught, I will be more than willing to share my virtual stash of Easter Eggs/Chocolate Bunnies/Jelly beans. He had no will, you know. I am the sole beneficiary.

Does this mean I have to wear bunny ears and deliver chocolate to all the good girls and boys this Sunday? Have any of you seen the Santa Clause?

Apr. 11, 2001, 08:25 AM
Worthy that awful!! Here's a story, but you have to have a hardened heart to read it. This is a true story.

2 Easters ago we were driving up our county road on Easter morning. There at the side of the road was a little white body. As we have 2 white cats that have the run of our property, we stopped the car to make sure one of "our guys" hadn't been hit by a car. Low and behold it was a bunny. But not any old bunny - it was the Easter Bunny. I guess the person who hit said bunny decided to play a joke-the little dead bunny was clutching a small wicker basket with a few chocolate eggs in it.

L Scott
Apr. 11, 2001, 08:29 AM
Worthy, that is so awful and so..... awful. I am laughing mostly because I can relate.

Years ago on a drive home from Collingwood at night, we hit something huge. It was a blond colour and ran out in front of us across a two lane road. We didn't see eyes or have even a chance to break. We stopped and tried to find it but it was nowhere to be seen. Never even thought to look at the car.

Got home and hubs went around to the front of the car to access damage. I hear some good trading floor language and go to see what's up. The fender is hanging by a thread. We just pulled it off without trying.

I think it was a dog or Coyote(are there wolves in Ontario?), but who knows. In the dark it looked like a sheep. I was afraid of that highway for a long time afterwards.

Apr. 11, 2001, 09:28 AM
It's OK Worthy - I am hear to absorb your bunnyguilt...

I have been thinking VERY evil thoughts about bunnies, who have been nibbling my pansies, my little tender newborn hostas, not to mention my (should be) blooming and beautiful clematis vine (a mere nub of it's former self). I am sure it was the sheer evilness and ill will that I feel towards bunnies that caused that bunny to make the suicide dash, so it isn't your fault...

And yes, I sorta giggled too, but unlike VT (evil, callous person that she is /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif ), I have some well placed bunnyanger to deal with /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 09:34 AM
I have a conference room just behind my office and I laughed so hard when I read your 'Easter Bunny with a basket' that I heard the meeting get very hush for a second! Oops! Their going to take my internet access away or fire me yet!


Apr. 11, 2001, 09:38 AM
I ran over a cat over ten years ago on my way home from a "date" (I was 16 and it wasn't much of a date, more dinner and watching tv), but, nonetheless, I was on cloud nine--until...

Kitty runs out onto the El Camino (four lane road) and right in front of me /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif No time to stop and can't swerve because of oncoming traffic.

Cat was very dead and I cried all the way home where I then threw up. Way to end a great date!!

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:00 AM
Poor Worthy, that stinks! I almost committed bunny murder myself at Pin Oak. Almost squashed bunny between tire and speed bump. Yuck. Luckily, it scampered away, avoiding the huge truck coming the other way, too. Some bunnies are luckier, I guess.

My husband always wants to throttle me when I swerve for animals. I will risk our lives (if I see the darn things) to avoid hitting them. Forget oncoming traffic...it's all about the animal! /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:05 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> but unlike VT (evil, callous person that she is /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif ), <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You'll think 'evil' when I leave the ring with an armful of ribbons next week and you'll be listed as an "also ran."

Just kidding - you will EASILY kick my tail!

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:09 AM
Yuck - it really does ruin your day, doesn't it?
I once accidentally ran over a snake, thinking it was just a stick in the road, and had nightmares about it later.

Ahem, then there was the time a bat flew in front of the truck. I could have sworn I hit it, but never felt a bump.

A week or two later, I happened to walk around the front of the truck, and there, plastered across the grill, was...

I think I made someone else pry it off.

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:12 AM
I missed a deer once and hit a bridge!!! Hit a german shepard on a back road pulling a trailer, and had no place to pull off. There was a state trooper behind me that took care of it, and when he caught up to me, I was shakeing and crying on the side of the road. I felt so badly--it was someone's beloved friend. I guess the biggest problem that I had, was the fact that I felt every tire (2 truck, 2 trailer) go over it...

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:15 AM
My trainer was trailering us to a show, and as we were going down the hill by the barn, she said, "Oh, look at the cute bunnies". So, we looked at the cute little bunnies hopping in the road...and hopping in the road...and then we hit one of them. Not that there was anything that could have been done, towing two horses down the hill...but it was still kind of funny.

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:18 AM
I feel for you. I have only killed a few birds that committed suicide by flying into my windshield and a turtle that darted into the road before I could stop. One of the birds smashed all over said windshield and I drove home trying not to throw up while I looked through the mashed bird and tried to decide if it would be better to leave it or turn on the wipers and smear around all the feathers, blood and feet.

My favorite was the person in Virginia I knew who hit a small deer, thought it was dead and put it in the backseat of her Honda. Unfortunately it was only stunned and woke up, panicked and kicked all the windows out of her car before she got the door open and it escaped.

And re: the dead Easter Bunny - here in Texas people have strange sense of humor. For some reason many armadillos (Texas speed bumps) that get hit by cars wind up lying on their backs with their little legs in the air. And someone (some good ol' boy gettin' rid of the empties no doubt) is constantly placing empty beer cans between their little claws so they wind up lying around on the shoulder of the road with a can of Lone Star clutched in their paws...It is truly a Texas phenomenon.

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:22 AM
Well, of course I will VT, but that is because I come equipped with authentic cajun voodoo charms.
You think SU's magic is powerful stuff? Heh heh heh heh...

Muhahahahahaaha /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:27 AM
*tut tut* No Easter PEEPs in your basket THIS year, missy.


Apr. 11, 2001, 10:31 AM
Yeah, those little turtles are speedy rascals aren't they? /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:32 AM
Well, thank GOD someone thought to get rid of that pesky little twitchy-nosed menace! Little obnoxious hopping fluffy tailed brat, bringing chocolate and appealing coloured candy around just in time to break any remaining resolve of sugarless NewYears!!! What is he, really, satan of the sweets?? C'mon, everybody knows a bunny is the universal symbol of temptation!!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif
And the Armadillos..LOLOL too funny, but whoever did that (obvioulsy purposely) to the bunny on easter was one major sicko, I don't see the humour in that one...

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:40 AM
Please...I take it all back...Please....play nice.

You are the better rider
You have the nicer horse
You have the cuter coach (well, that's subjective)

My bad...you are the bomb.

No curses please. I am really looking forward to showing next week!

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:57 AM
Yes, I will admit it; I was the @s* that rated your thread. I'm glad there are other people who feel guilt after they accidently kill something.

I guess I feel guilt to the extreme. In the spring the bull frogs come out in droves. A person cannot drive out of my road without running over hordes of them. I creep and try to swerve around them and most of the time get out of my car to pick them up and move them off the road. The other night I picked up 6 of them so I could get through. Fortunately it was late and my neighbors weren't up! They think I'm a nut as it is.

One morning I went into my barn and opened a stall door (to bring my horse in; the black smith was scheduled to come out). I have sliding doors with bars on the top half of the door and bars on the front of the stall. I heard a chirping sound and thought the mudders (wasp looking creatures that build mud nests all over the place, which I constantly war with) had started building another nest in the slides for the door. So I rolled the door back and forth a couple times (thinking all this time how I'd fix those damn mudders); all the time looking up at the slide to see the mud nest fall out. The chirping and sqawking gets louder. I suddenly look at the bars in the door, and here is the barn bat stuck between the bars of the door and the bars in the front of the stall. I suddenly realize here I am cheese grating this poor bat between the door and the front of the stall. It's sqawking as loud as it can. I scream and in hysterics run out to my SO, who is puttering in the yard, "You've got to kill it! You won't believe what I did! I'm soo stupid! I killed the bat." I manage to untangle the bat from between the bars and he goes and gets a rifle and shoots it. The only thing that is left from the bat is the greasy mark on the bottom of the stall door. /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif

To make matters worse, my black smith arrives and I'm still babbling about crippling the bat. And he makes fun of me! Till this day, he still asks me how my bat population is thriving. /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif

~the bat killer

Apr. 11, 2001, 11:20 AM
RedHotHorse; I know about teased. Everyone at the barn last night had a good hoot at my mental state, making jokes, laughing, it was awful. One girl even lamented she didn't have her digital camera with her. What, like she's gonna put it in the barn newsletter?!? Strange tho' how none of them would go remove it from my headlight.

I had nightmares last night about bunnies; they were a hop-hop-hopping around and then WHAMMO there goes my evil Ford station wagon. It was like a game of Frogger.

My boss almost had a seizure laughing at me this morning - he's Italian, they eat bunnies. My Husband has spent this morning trying to locate a replacement headlight for my quite ancient wagon. He's been trying to be sympathetic...but I see a hint of a smile everytime he says "...I'm sure it died quickly. No pain at all".

The worst was when I opened my office mail this morning and the first thing was an easter card from my MIL with a big, grinning, cute-as-a-button bunny on it.

Oh the shame.

Worthy, aka The Bunny Butcher

Apr. 11, 2001, 11:36 AM
Well, golly, we are all animal murderers. I can relate to the bird on the windshield thing. Been there, done that. Ick!

RedHotHorse, when you started your story, I thought it was going to be a frog that got caught in the door track. When I first moved to my farm, there were frogs everywhere. Indeed, that is how I came up with the name for it. But you couldn't walk anywhere without them being under foot. You have not lived until you have stepped on a frog. Squish! /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 11:50 AM
i was comming home from the barn late. 10pm. i got off the highway and a bunny darted right under my wheels. i ran him over! i felt so bad. but it was dangerous to stop the car. so i called my friends but no one was home. so i turned the car around and went back. he was smashed. i was crying. the bunny was dead. i did scape him off the road with a stick, so no one would run him over again. now i see him on my ride to work. i feel so bad that i am thinking of burying him. i can't believe someone else did this too.

Apr. 11, 2001, 11:52 AM
OMG I did the stall door thing on a mouse one time. I was sick for a week.

Apr. 11, 2001, 12:04 PM
Oh, Sleepy you are right! I have a another frog experience! I bought "RedHot" off the track as a stud horse (a five year old stud at that!). I brought him home and had the vet geld him. It ended up being a very unroutine gelding experience, and recovery took twice as long as it usually does. Well, part of the recovery he had to be extensively hand walked. So walking around the indoor arena, we passed by a bull frog. (Like I mentioned before my farm is over run with frogs in the spring.) I made a note of where he was at so we wouldn't run him over, but I must have forgotten about him because a couple days later I noticed that frog was now a squished dried place in the sand. ick. Someone stepped on the frog and I am wondering who did it!!

Apr. 11, 2001, 12:29 PM
I once nailed TWO raccoons at the same time. I was taking a curve very fast in the middle of the night. A whole herd of 'em were in the middle of the road. Some went this way; some went that way. Some went under the wheels. Ugh. Horrible!

Sweet Pea
Apr. 11, 2001, 12:40 PM
Once I threw a bale of hay down from the hay loft, and it landed on top of a kitten!! It was terrible! I was only about 12 or so, which made it even worse. The kitten flopped around on the floor for a while, but eventually recovered. It was promptly named 'Miracle'.

Apr. 11, 2001, 01:18 PM
I'd forgotten about the darn frogs - up in NH they were all over the road one rainy night and I was swerving to avoid them, going about 10 miles an hour. Next thing I know I've got a cop giving me a drunk test (stand on one foot, tilt your head back and touch your nose etc). I tried to explain about the frogs...

I also got stopped by the police on the Beltway in DC trying to rescue a snapping turtle. I was in full corporate war attire - business suit, 3 inch heels etc. trying to sprint out and grab the thing, which kept trying to grab me back- so I'd run back off the road and look for weapons and then run back. By the time the cop got there I had a run in my pantyhose, was barefoot, the turtle had broken my finger and I was crying and my mascara was running. Made the cop put on his lights, stop traffic and rescue turtle. He was a good sport about it. I was atoning for the turtle life I had taken previously...

I drive very slowly on country roads at night, scanning the roadside for the gleam of little animals eyes. Needless to say, I have mistakenly slowed down for the gleam of empty beercans...

L Scott
Apr. 11, 2001, 01:21 PM
I am having such a bad day. This thread is really disgusting and I can't stop laughing at it. Reading it to a friend, I was mortified and laughing hysterically while being mortified. It has brought back every poor ant I ever stepped on, every mouse present Owen has brought home, every bird present Owen has brought home, the thing that totalled our car, the squirrel that fell from a tree on my hood and nearly gave me a coronary, and the deer we managed to miss.

I am so shamed and full of guilt.

On a "lighter" note, anyone ever been to Bermuda? They have these huge toads that only come out at night and there are thousands of them flattened on the roadways. It took me a week to get over it. Never saw a living one. I wonder if Bermudians suffer so?

/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 01:32 PM
I once hit a cat & thought he was still alive, so I wrapped him in my jacket & put him in the front seat of my car. I arrivd at my boyfriend's house sobbing like an idiot. He took one look at the cat and told me he was dead, but I was convinced that he was still breathing. It was 11:00 p.m., I don't know where I thought I was going to take the darn thing!!

But I made my boyfriend (now husband) get in the back seat and off we drove down the road with this dead? alive? cat in the passenger seat! It wasn't until I smelled something . . . and my boyfriend denied farting!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif . . . that I began to suspect the cat really was dead after all . . . /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

I pulled over and dumped that dead, farting cat into the ditch as fast as I could!!

Apr. 11, 2001, 02:11 PM
You definitely have my sympathies. Something akin to that happened to me years ago, involving a cat.

I went down to my car to go to work. I was living in an apartment then, and my car was in an open carport. I started up the car, and there was a big thunk and fur flying. /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif I absolutely freaked, wondering what to do, but had to get to work for an early morning meeting. So I started driving, with the car running very sluggishly. After about a mile, I heard a sound like something was dropping out of the car, and looked behind me, but saw nothing.

When I got to work, still shaking and rather hysterical, I had a guy I worked with open the hood. All he saw was a lot of gray fur; he surmised that a cat had crawled up into the engine of my car early in the morning for warmth, and that a fan blade had struck the cat when I turned on the engine, probably killing it virtually instantly. He thought the noise I had heard while driving was the cat (or what was left of it at that point) falling out of the engine compartment - and I recalled that after that, the car was running much more smoothly and easily.

There wasn't anything I could have done to have prevented it, but I felt soooo bad about it for such a long time..... And was very nervous starting the car for quite some time afterwards.... /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 02:22 PM
Sorry for the bunny.

What area is it that bull frogs come out in droves-yuck.

Apr. 11, 2001, 02:42 PM
anyone remember that song, 'Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road'???

Here's what Arizona Highway personnel did when they came across roadkill..... /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 03:24 PM
on the bunny slattered across the headlights is gross thank you !!!!!
BUt i sympathize with you about having hysterics after!!
I ran over a dog a long time ago he just ran out in front of me .I was weeping etc took him to nearest vet . jeez that was awful!1

Apr. 11, 2001, 04:12 PM
LOL @ dublin!!

Ph gosh, the poor thing got hit then painted. I wonder who the heck did that!! *tut tut* /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif


Apr. 11, 2001, 04:30 PM
Oh I'm so glad there are other people who slow down for wildlife--I can't drive so I make my family slow down /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif --We hit a deer once, driving up to the mountains, the day after Christmas, to try out our new snowboards~~completely smahed the front end of our car--replaced the hood, fenders, etc....about $3000 worth or damamge, and all I could do was stare back at the poor deer gasping by the highway /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif My dad couldn't stop shaking afterwards for about 2 hours. Skiing wasn't a whole lot of fun the rest of that day.

I rescue animals injured on the sides of the road when I can; many squirrels, many calls about larger things like deer and dogs--I feel so guilty if I don't at least try to help.

Saddest thing I ever witnessed was driving to a lesson one winter night with my dad. We were turning a corner to head up a hill to the barn, and see this deer moving on the side of the road, thrashing and struggling, its leg was caught in a fence or wire or something--not a trap, this was a main road. Obviously, neither of us could just leave it there--guilt from the ski trip/deer maiming--so we turned around and headed to the local police station, about 50 yards back. We tell someone in the parking lot about it, and he says, "Yeah, someone alerted us, we're sending out some of our guys to deal with it."
OK whew. So we head back off to barn, passing the same spot, just to see what they're doing. Well, this deer appeared to be all right, aside from being entangled, and we thought they'd tranq him and undo the damage or at least check him out first, then haul him off into the woods and release him or soemthing. But no, they pull up in their big ole trunk, drag a couple rifles out of the bed and load them--at this point I started yelling for my dad to keep driving, I did NOT want to watch this--and aim at the deer. He of course saw the guns and hit the gas.

Every time I see that curve of the road at night I think about that poor deer. /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif

OK, next happy thread!

Apr. 11, 2001, 05:14 PM
I had a deer get back at drivers for all of its dead friends. /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

I was driving very slowly on a road near my house where there are always tons of deer. This one guy came out of nowhere and ran...get this...not in front of me, but into the SIDE of my car! I was so freaked out, crying, etc. Until I realized that the deer just dented my car, laughed at me, and jumped nimbly (and unhurt!) away!! Weird...

As to frogs/toads, we have some in our yard. They like to play in the driveway, so of course I ended up squashing one while parking once. I have done everything, but I still have frog gut stains welcoming my friends... /infopop/emoticons/icon_mad.gif

Apr. 11, 2001, 05:31 PM
This thread is awful..ly funny.

Black humour is our way of dealing with the guilt/sorrow.

I once was driving on the highway behind a guy who ran OVER a seagull (nasty creatures) If you've ever seen a feather pillow explode, you'll have some idea of what happened when the seagull bounced off the bottom of his car.

Apr. 11, 2001, 05:58 PM
A friend sent us a video clip of pro baseball pitcher Randy Johnson hitting a seagull recently with a 95 mph pitch! (He wasn't intending to do it, the bird just happened to fly in front of the batter at the exact wrong time).

Well, it also looked exactly like a down pillow exploding!!! Pretty amazing to see.... /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

"Of course, that's only my opinion. I could be wrong." - Dennis Miller

Apr. 11, 2001, 06:05 PM
just reminded me of when I lived on the eastern shore of md.I was driving back from judging I think on the western shore it was like 2 am and I was in Gawds country fog etc outta no where a deer canters into my car glances off .I am shaking heart throbbing the whole bit . Pull off the road get out look at my car , nothing look around a bit no deer. I literally had to pull in ot the nearest parking lot in a tiny town and sit there for 30 minutes shaking.

Apr. 11, 2001, 08:38 PM
Okay, please keep in mind while reading this that I've had my drivers license since Oct. 14, 2000. Anywho, apparently animals see my Explorer as a way to quickly end their sad little lives.

First incident was driving home from the Secretary of the State's office ON my birthday...I kill a little bird. Now, I heard the little *thump* sound it made...I thought that that was bad enough....but NOOO. I get out of my car when I get to my friend's house and its head is stuck in the grill of my car, neck well...not bending in a good looking way, and feet twitching. This sends me to instant tears and I run into my friends house and make him go remove the...remains.

Then, the next day, I'm driving my friend home at night and I see a possum crossing the road. Normally I wouldn't feel bad about hitting any old possum, but this was a baby lookin one and I would feel bad for it. So, Im going like 20 miles an hour and this thing seriously makes a mad dash for my front left tire. Knowing what was eventually going to happen, my friend and I start screaming (it was my girliest moment ever) and we pick our feet up. Why I do not know, maybe we wouldn't feel the bumps?? lol...so anywho, I turn around to see if maybe it survived. The poor thing was smashed from the middle of its back so its tail and pulling itself with its front legs the rest of the way across the road... I went my other friends house (yes, the one that pulled the bird outta my car) and had him go finish it off. I couldn't bring myself to do it. You should've seen the look it gave me!

Since then I've hit 4 more possums...yes, that's 5 possums in 6 months folks. I've also killed one or two squirrels. I'm still not desensitized.

OH! And tonight on my way home from work, I almost hit a deer. It was running out of the woods and in the process of jumping over the ditch when I saw it. I slammed on my brakes and swerved....my trusty car went sideways as the deer stopped, looked at me, and trotted back into the woods. I just sat there for a minute and continued on my way.

Maybe I should look into public transportation??

~*~Erin B~*~

[This message was edited by JumperEq on Apr. 11, 2001 at 11:58 PM.]

Apr. 11, 2001, 10:09 PM
Friend's daughter gets her license, BEGS Mom to let her drive the new car to her friend's house for a homework session. Mom says NO but daughter pleads, cajoles, etc and eventually goes skipping out to the new Caddy. Driving down a country road going a *little* too fast WHUMP

a BLACK BEAR rolls up the hood, smashes thru the windshield and lands in passenger seat! Girl completely PANICS AND DRIVES 3 MILES INTO TOWN with the bear IN THE CAR and literally INTO the sheriffs office through the glass doors!!!! Cops come running; fearing an explosion they're yelling "KID GET OUT OF THE CAR!!!!!" She screams back, "NO WAY, this is my mother's new car! You get the BEAR out of the car!!!"

"Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo"

Apr. 12, 2001, 05:31 AM
I saw the aftermath of a horse/Corvette accident one night on the way home from the barn. Happened at a stoplight and I'm not sure who had the right of way. The horse was dead in the road and the Corvette was definitely close to death.

This is an unfortunate thing about the areas outside of Houston - people keep these "house horses" and they keep getting out of the yard and onto the roads. I've stopped twice to catch loose horses grazing on the side of the highway (I always have spare lead ropes, halters and horse cookies in the back of the Suburban). And unlike with dogs the darn horses never have name tags or rabies tags to tell you who to call to come get them. And you can't load them in the car and drive around with them. (I did that with a golden retriever once- found her on a busy highway and spent the next 16 hours in the car with her, calling various vets and rescues and hoping she'd react to some neighborhood with a little recognition.) So people, if you are going to let your horse roam free, make sure it is wearing identification tags....

Apr. 12, 2001, 05:45 AM
I was coming home late one night in a thunderstorm and came around the last curve about a half mile from home and caught what I thought was a baby possum in the headlights. I swerved to miss it (DO NOT EVER DO THIS!) and continued for about 100 feet and slammed on brakes because by this time I had decided it was a mighty funny looking possum. I hiked back in the driving rain to see what it was and found a half-drowned Siamese kitten with burned pads. We never found out how that kitten got in the road in the middle of nowhere but the Bud cat still rules my mother's house today. (I couldn't keep it myself because the JR's would have eaten it.)

BTW, if you want to rescue a snapping turtle from the road, pick it up by the tail. I do this a lot and apparently am not the only one in my village to do so, because some woman flagged me down one day on the main road into town to help her get this turtle out of the middle of the road.

Apr. 12, 2001, 06:44 AM
Of course, since my bunny incident two days ago, I have been subjected to many "well, once I hit..." stories and this so far is the best one.

I work for a trucking company, and a couple of years ago, one of our trucks hit a wild turkey. Except the turkey didn't die, it went through the windshield. And lived. And proceeded to attempt to peck the driver to death. Imagine it, a truck driver pulling 80,000 pounds of tractor-trailer, trying to beat off a wild turkey in the front seat. Amazing no one died - including the turkey.

Funny thing tho' - last night my only sister called and told me she was pregnant - I'm going to be an aunt for the first time! I was perplexed when she said "well, you should have KNOWN!!" Why?...I enquire....

"Well, the rabbit died!!!!"

Apr. 12, 2001, 06:49 AM
for the laugh Worthy. Does your sister play on this board? If not, she should.

Apr. 12, 2001, 06:53 AM
The rabbit died..... /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Apr. 12, 2001, 08:00 AM
Heard a story from a customer who has a lodge in Alaska. A "neighbor" brought up 5 horses and figured he'd let them run free and forage for themselves (I guess they do this in Texas?)

The horses took off after being unloaded from the barge. Three went upriver way and were finished off by bears. The other two headed downriver and somehow survived one winter, but the guy never was able to get them back!

Apr. 12, 2001, 08:07 AM
Wow, I'm amazed at the wildlife that roams the highways of America! I'm trying to imagine all these scenarios: bears in the front seat, mushed bunnies, vicious turtles, suicidal deer, etc.

The only thing we have to veer for is the occasional disoriented homeless person.

Apr. 12, 2001, 09:00 AM
Merry, just like Moesha! Isn't he the one that's forever swerving around random naked people in the road? /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Anyone drive in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan? The western side is without question group animal suicide land. Like lemmings near a cliff! You literally zig-zag down the road, swerving around all the little pairs of eyes jumping toward you... /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

I ran into a wall once without even swerving around any little critters. My bad. My mom was in the car and oh so pleased... /infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif

Apr. 12, 2001, 09:40 AM

Apr. 12, 2001, 09:51 AM
Worthy, I have managed to avoid the critters, too...but you're right about the carcasses. It's so sad. We counted way into the teens one time ON ONE ROAD!!!!! The poor deer...

It's nice that it's so wild, though. We used to drive from NY through Canada and across the UP...some relatives have a beautiful cottage on an almost private lake. It's SO pretty and quiet...very relaxing (except when you're driving around at night!)

Apr. 12, 2001, 02:01 PM
Thing about where I live that perplexes me the most... you can sit in a tree stand for 12 hours and not hit a single deer... then hop in your car and take out ten of 'em! The deer in Hunterdon county want to die.

My favorite example of this... I'm sitting in study hall and I hear from behind me, "Lindsay... I can see you..." I turn around and one of my friends who is a senior is holding his mirror. He has his back to my table and is watching me with it. Curious about what happened, he said that he was driving to his house the night before and he sees a deer. He has no choice but to keep driving and the thing bounds down the hill... He didn't hit it, it ran into the car. You can't hit a deer when it runs into the SIDE of the car!!! The deer took of the mirror and demolished the driver side door... My best friend's mom had the same thing happen where the deer ran down and into the side of the car... that happened twice to her in a month.

Apr. 12, 2001, 02:18 PM
Who would have thought Roadkill would be such a popular topic?

Anyone got any good recipes? /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Apr. 12, 2001, 03:53 PM
I'm just happy to know that the people on this BB can laugh about road kill but still have some sympathy. I rode the school bus with the most horrible group of guys in the 9th grade. I mean HORRIBLE. One day the bus driver hit this girl's cat when she was pulling up to the bus stop. The cat is smashed, the girl runs crying into her house. We go on to school. The next day, and every day after that (this happened in October, mind you) every time the girl got onto the bus, all the guys would go "thump, thump--MEOW!" They also regularly snuck into her neighborhood and drew cat shaped chalk outlines on the street in front of her house.

Only one of those guys has grown into an even remotely functional adult. /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Apr. 12, 2001, 04:35 PM
Of when I was 12 or so coming home from school on a rainy fall afternoon. The bus's wipers were going like mad when this big maple leaf gets stuck under one and starts making a hideous noise. Then at the next stop we realize the 'leaf' had wings, claws and fangs!

"Another bat hits the bus. And another comes on and another comes on. Another bat hits the bus!"

"Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo"

Apr. 12, 2001, 04:43 PM
soo sad but so funny!

I remember a long time ago we were going back from my aunts and I heard my mom gasp, so I looked up and saw this deer flying towards up! We hit it and pull over, I was crying (I was 14) but the poor thing wasn't dead. Luckily a cop was behind us and was checking things out. I asked my dad if it was o.k, he said yep, it walked away and was gone. Just as he said that *BANG!* the cop shot it! lier!

After that my mom was very careful about animals on the road and it wasn't 2 weeks later when we were driving down a really steep hill and a ground hog ran out. She couldn't stop and she samcked it, well the thing flew 5 feet in the air (very dramtically) land on it's back and then proceeded to roll down the hill at a good speed almost as it to race us. She was hysterical!

To top it off, the same summer we were driving along (my mom again was behind the wheel) and we were coming up to asome seasguls. She slowed down but one seagull was having some trouble and didn't get high enough in time. All we saw was it's little legs smack against the top of our windshield.

Then there was my sister who had the worst roadkill insident of all. This one still gives me nightmares. She was driving along, bopping to some real loud tunes (had to be to drown out sound of the car) when she sees this black thing on the road. With no time to swerve or brake she thought that she's stradle the "thing" so her tires wouldn't run it over. Well she came to a COMPLETE stop, sparkes flew and her car jerked. Stunned, she gets out and looks under her car and saw that she hit.....a tire. Complete with rim! it must of fell out of someones truck bed. Anyways, it was completly wedged under her car, she couldn't get it out so she spots 2 people walking runs over and says "I hit a tire." They stare at her, she stares back and finally the guy comes over and holds the tire as she backs up. It ended up pushing the engine block back 3 inches and the tire was stuffed and hung at our barn /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Apr. 13, 2001, 05:51 PM
I have my share of roadkill stories.

One summer day I was driving into work when I noticed a couple of those mourning doves waddling about in the middle of the road - "hmm, black macadam, warm, good, nice on cold dove feet" which may be giving the critters way too much credit for thought. Nevertheless, as I approached the area of the avian sunbath said birds exploded into flight - as doves do - and I heard a sickening thud. One dove flew off as a cloud of feathers exploded in front of my windshield. Eecch, I said and thought no more about it. Until the phone rang at my desk.

"Uh, Sue" came the voice of one of my colleagues, "Webbo and I were out here on his stinky butt break (iow, they were outside so Webbo could smoke) and we decided to remove your new hood ornament. Would you like us to save it for your lunch?"

Turns out said dove had somehow managed to attach itself to the grill of my car by its head. Which explained the horrified looks on the faces of oncoming motorists.

As for deer - at one point I received a call from yet another colleague explaining he would be late that day because he had hit a deer. I asked if his truck was okay only to receive the reply that the truck was fine but he was taking the deer to his friend's place so they could cut it up for future meals (eat what you kill)

Sue (gotta go find that RoadKill Cafe menu now)

M. O'Connor
Apr. 13, 2001, 06:44 PM
My dad once swerved to miss a bunny. The bunny got away. The Blazer in the other lane didn't, and his truck was totaled! He was carted off to the hospital, minor cuts and bruises...his truck was loaded onto a flatbed trailer...meanwhile back at the barn....my lesson didn't show up....didn't call....we were about to go home, when they pull into the driveway, jump out of the car and start shouting: "OMG! This MAN swerved to miss a RABBIT, and HIT US!!! We're lucky to be ALIVE!!! WE COULD HAVE ALL BEEN KILLED!!!" Then dead silence and puzzled (she noticed I was wearing a shirt with my dad's business logo on it...) ..."HE had a shirt just like YOURS!!!"

Apr. 13, 2001, 07:33 PM
Has anyone ever done the "Crank the car, kill the cat" one? Ugh, that is awful...

Apr. 13, 2001, 08:44 PM
Maybe it's my lack of sleep, but I am CRYING I am laughing so hard at your story. "He had a shirt just like yours" I LOVE IT. The cosmic craziness of coincidence strikes again. Thanks for posting it!

"Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo"

Apr. 14, 2001, 06:59 AM
I'm only 16 (well 17 in two months) and I've already had my share of incidents with roadkill.

Once I was about 12-13 and my brother was about 16-17 and he was driving his little red ranger home from somewhere with my dad. A deer comes flying out of the woods, hits the the truck at the point where the windsheild joins the driver window. Shatters the windshield, shatters the window, dents the fender and door to pieces, but they drive home with the deer on the hood (they were about a mile away). So they get home, Lon (my bro) gets out of the driver-seat and he has glass in his shirt, in his pants, in his boxers. He takes off his shoes and there is glass stuck in them. We had to replace the whole left front of the vehicle.

Once on the way to districts with my old horse we were going down a hill when this hunting dog ran out into the middle of the road. We couldn't stop. Then of course, all four tires hit it and there is this sickening crunch.

Once when we were out camping we got in the car to leave. Well there were these stray kittens around the cabin and one of them had crawled up into the car and was sleeping there. Well, Mom was the only one in the car and she started it up - nothing. Then she backed up slowly and the kitten fell out of the car RIGHT behind the front right tire. WE were waving our arms and screaming but of course she didn't hear us until she had the poor thing wedged half under the wheel, still twitching. My dad had to break its neck and throw it into the woods. It was horrible.

Once I was cutting grass out front and this woman in a van hit a dog right in front of my house. It was a hunting dog and she had broken its leg and it was in shock. So I had to drive the lawnmower up to the house and get my dad, who went down with the shotgun and killed the poor animal. I cried for days.
Besides that, I have hit a couple birds, a couple squirrels, and a german shepard. HOrrible, All of them.

And speaking out STUPID animals, there is this stupid red bird outside of my window as I type that returns EVERY year so that he can fly repeatedly into the window, daze himself, and repeat the idiot behavior. Every 10 minutes I hear this THUMP and there he is again - attacking the window. Stupid stupid stupid.

Apr. 9, 2002, 11:01 PM
when I read this! I can't resist posting to this one--sorry it's not horse related!

My boyfriend (now husband) and I were invited to a wedding an hour from my hometown in late June. It had sprinkled on and off throughout the day, and there was a mass exodus of leopard frogs from the sloughs and ditches that evening. I couldn't help but wince with every little "thump, thump, thump." But since there were seemingly millions, I simply couldn't swerve, and going slower didn't help.

The next day was a scorcher, and I noticed my Blazer had a horrible smell, as well as a large following of flies. I also noticed a cat going bonkers under the vehicle, so I decided to investigate.

It turned out that dozens of the frogs I had struck the night before had become lodged in my undercarriage and suspension--and the cat was playing with the dangling legs of the bloated little corpses!

I was sooooo grossed out, I told my mom I had to go to town and wash my car. Needless to say, I got banned from that carwash for the rest of my Blazer's life!!!

"The frog does not drink up the pond in which it lives." ancient Aztec proverb.

Apr. 9, 2002, 11:57 PM
Beat this one!! It happened to a friend of mine and his parents when he was very young:

They were driving along in their truck, in Texas I think, and the road went alongside a tall bluff. Right as they were driving under the bottom of the cliff a COW fell off it onto the roadway. They caught it on the bounce.

The cow died. I'm not too sure about the truck.

Sandy M
Apr. 10, 2002, 08:16 AM
I do wonder sometimes if the wild and no-so-wild life is sometimes a wee-bit suicidal, or if it's like the cartoons, and their fellow bunnies/kitties/dogs are daring them to cross the road when a vehicle comes along as some sort of "I dare you" contest.

I was driving out to the barn a couple of years ago and a cat RAN INTO THE SIDE OF MY FRONT TIRE. I didn't hit him - he hit me. I looked in the rear-view mirror and he was twitching. Yuck - just awful. I immediately stopped and went back, hoping that perhaps he had just broken a leg or something and I could take him to a vet, but by the time I got back to him, he was very, very dead. Big tiger cat - I always wondered if he was partially blind or something that he would run into the side of my truck - it isn't like he underestimated how fast he needed to go to pass in FRONT of me.

Apr. 10, 2002, 10:37 AM
...and saw "April 11th", and for a few minutes was completely baffled at how you guys had managed to post with tomorrow's date.
DUH! 2001!
So it's like, 364 since this thread was started. Crazy!


Apr. 10, 2002, 10:59 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Emma MHC:
...and saw "April 11th", and for a few minutes was completely baffled at how you guys had managed to post with tomorrow's date.
DUH! 2001!
So it's like, 364 since this thread was started. Crazy!


ROTFL! I thought I was the only one!!!

Apr. 10, 2002, 11:11 AM
I totally pancaked a chipmunk, both tires. I felt it in the steering wheel. What I can't believe is the drivers who hit people and say they never felt anything. How lubricated are they?

Apr. 10, 2002, 11:48 AM
Shocker to see this thread pop up.

I am the bunny murderer in question. And this IS horse related, I squished said bunny on the way to the barn.

It's a year later, I can sleep a little better, but my poor station wagon still bears scars.

Took months to get the bunny fur off the engine.

Apr. 10, 2002, 12:18 PM
I think at 16 you need to slow down. Something is definitely wrong when you have hit that many animals within what should be a short driving window. And I am not even going to get into the fact that your father is breaking animals necks and blowing them away with a shotgun.

*Behind every good woman lies a trail of men*

Apr. 10, 2002, 01:05 PM
This is my most favorite thread ever! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

*Pony Rock*

Apr. 10, 2002, 01:30 PM
We have a lot of vultures out this way nd let me give a warning. If you see vultures working over some road kill make sure you slow down.

The take-off speed of a vulture is very slow. We almost caught one in the windshield of the pickup. I wasn't sure that if we killed the vulture would the other vultures eat it or would that be canablism?

Apr. 10, 2002, 01:35 PM
Coming home from the barn Sunday, I almost hit an endangered species. Yup, a red-tailed hawk who was clearly hunting at the time he was dive-bombing my truck. But the fact that I had to slow down so quickly enabled me to see a red-cockaded woodpecker which I had never seen before. Those birds are HUGE.

Apr. 10, 2002, 01:49 PM
One day venturing to the barn via our lovely 2-lane highway, I approached this low spot on the rode (by a marsh). I slowed down because, goll darnit, the road looked like it was alive. With cars everywhere there wasn't much to do but keep going, and when I got within 20 feet, I realized there were THOUSANDS of frogs crossing the road -- *********SCREAM*********** and yank my feet up off the floorboard and shudder as I *pop* *pop* *pop* *pop* across the frog-highway.

EEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwww. To this day just remembering it gives me the willies. /infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

Hopeful Farm Sport Horses -- Home of the licensed RPSI stallion, Remarkable.

Apr. 10, 2002, 02:17 PM
On the topic of bizaare coincidences:

A friend of mine was waiting for a lesson to show up, when he got a call from a neighbor totally panicked--he had come home and found his wife missing--she had gone out riding about 3 hours earlier and the horse had been standing in the driveway alone when he got there. So, my friend leaves a note for clients, and joins the search party.

Night is falling, and someone in the search party says, why don't we get "Bill's" four-wheelers--they have lights, etc. However, repeated calls to Bill's home have no answer, but they finally get his wife at work who tells them where the keys are. They go out on the four wheelers, and find her. She's in bad shape, so they call 911, and neighbor asks friend to drive to the hospital so he can ride in the ambulance but have a way to get home.

In the meantime, friend returns the 4-wheelers, to find out from Bill's wife that he's been in a car accident, and has a broken arm, and that's why no one could find him.

Friend drives to hospital, waits several hours on news about neighbor's wife (badly injured, but would make a full recovery) and drives neighbor home. It's now 3:00 am, and he's exhausted and starving, so stops into the IHOP to eat.

Who does he find in there, but clients he was waiting for earlier, all in various states of dissaray. Turns out they were in a car accident, car was totaled, and they had never made it to his place. Who had they been in the accident with, Bill of course. But just when the Twilight ZOne music gets going, youngest daughter said, "When I was waiting for my cat scan, I had to wait a little longer because there was this lady that was really badly hurt--they said she'd been hurt on horseback! Said they'd had a big search party out looking for hours for her. Wonder who that was??"

DEE DEE, dee dee, DEE DEE, dee dee . . .

Apr. 10, 2002, 04:33 PM
NOW I've got the willies! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

"The frog does not drink up the pond in which it lives." ancient Aztec proverb.

Apr. 10, 2002, 04:53 PM
This is a great thread but I think that my absolute favorite is Inlaws that should be outlawed (http://chronofhorse.infopop.net/2/OpenTopic?a=tpc&s=691099205&f=1970907951&m=3743015962) /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif HAHA found it!! See you guys! I am going bumping now!!!

Jack ~On the Rocks~ PLEASE /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif
Momo ~Just My Luck~

A woman only needs two animals in her life.. the horse of her dreams and a jackass to pay for it!

[This message was edited by Court@HJ-OH on Apr. 10, 2002 at 08:03 PM.]

Apr. 10, 2002, 05:07 PM
Late one night my brother hit a Coyote and didn't tell anyone. The next morning my mom and I saw it, I jokingly said "oh I bet it was John (my brother) who hit it" My mom said "oh I bet it was our horrible neighber he is always speeding. Well when we got home i asked my brother if he had seen it, and he said "yeah I saw it, I hit it!"

The a few days ago in the middle of the day. A baby deer goes running through our yard and out to the street. My two dogs (very old Golden and Brittney) go tearing after it. The deer gets attacked by my dogs are few times, but amazingly he escapes unharmed!!

Ther emust be something wierd going on the last couple weeks, wild animals have been out in the middle of the day. Two days in a row I have seen coyotes right next to the ring at my barn.

"I don't patronize bunny rabbits!" -Heathers
*Nothing is foolproof to a talented fool.*

Apr. 10, 2002, 06:05 PM
Oh, I know this thread is old and for all I know I said the same thing LAST year when I read this thread (haven't checked), but imagine what people were thinking as you drove past with a bunny on your headlight! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

~Erin B #1
"Winny and I lived in a house that ran on static electricity... If you wanted to run the blender, you had to rub balloons on your head. If you wanted to cook, you had to pull off a sweater real quick."

Apr. 10, 2002, 07:32 PM
Actually, ErinB, someone did pass me. Now I'm slow, and my car is crappy, but there was NO reason for that passenger to look back at me and burst out laughing! I was very offended until I found Bugs peeled across the grill.

I kid you not.

Apr. 10, 2002, 09:34 PM
I did the same thing, only it was a bird. It went head first into my grille and was stuck there hanging and flopping about on the front of my car by its neck. /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif I couldn't touch it either, and I'm normally not a squeamish person. /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif

OTOH, back in 1997, I was engaged in a 3 month battle with DMV over my car. My father had passed away in 1995, and I notified DMV accordingly.

In 1997, I received my registration renewal for my plates, wrote the cheque and sent it in. Several weeks go by, I realise my tags are now dead, and still no plates. I call DMV and they say, "OH we're running slow. they'll be coming." Ok...so I wait another few weeks and call again. DMV has no clue what is up and suggests just dropping by one of the offices and renewing in person. So, I do. I stand in line for a bloody HOUR, only to be told that, "You can't renew your registration; you've a deceased party on your registration."
Well, DUH! I notified you of that TWO YEARS AGO. You've just NOW figured that out??? So I ask, "
Since my car was not re-registerable, a) why did you sent me a registration renewal form, and b) why didn't somebody notify me instead of sending my cheque off into the ether?" They said it wasn't their fault and that I needed to bring in a death certificate and my mother to sign for my deceased father.

At this point I couldn't make it back before DMV closed, so I had to wait until my next weekday off. So, I had to go to my mom's, get her and another copy of the death certificate (even though DMV said they knew Dad was dead, hence refusing to re-new the tags they still wanted proof. /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif ) and trundle back to DMV for more fun. /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

I go back to DMV, wait another hour, and submit my paperwork. I had personalised tags on my car, that I wanted to keep. DMV then tells me they cannot issue the tags to me because they are "already taken." No SH*T Sherlock! They are sitting on my car in my mother's driveway! They're MY tags! It took me 5 more days to convince DMV to give me my tags.

So, the car is finally registered and legal in my name. I drive over to my mom's and my husband drives my car home, while I'm driving Mom's. The next day, because Hubby wasn't on Mom's insurance, I was still driving Mom's car, so hubby took mine again (sporty little car with fast engine vs Pick up truck...no brainer there on which he'd prefer to drive for a day.) On the way home, Hubby sees a deer and swerves to miss it. In the process he clips the ditch and rolls my car three times.

After all that time and hassle with DMV (I spent over 7 HOURS in that stupid place) and not being able to drive my car for over 3 months, when I finally get it back, I never even got to drive it before my husband totals it. /infopop/emoticons/icon_mad.gif

~*~Come on, try a little, nothing is forever. There's got to be somewhere better than In The Middle...~*~

[This message was edited by creseida on Apr. 11, 2002 at 12:54 AM.]

Apr. 10, 2002, 10:57 PM
For maximum number of little lives snuffed out in the least time, nothing beats driving in the mountains of Utah when a swarm of Mormon Crickets decides to cross the road (and no, I don't know why the Cricket crosses the road and I don't want to know!). Mormon crickets are these big red grass-hopper looking things the size of Florida cockroaches so they make a really disgusting crunch when you smash one.A swarm can go for miles, there is no way to get around it, and the steady crunching as the tires squash hundreds of crickets is, well, gross. Although not as gross as what the tires look like after a few miles of this, with a thick red coating of cricket parts...

Besides the crickets I've been pretty lucky; the worst animal encounter I ever had was when (on the way to a riding lesson in Great Falls, Va so it is horse-related) a young deer ran full speed into the side of my car. While I was stopped at a red light. Are deer stupider these days than they used to be or what? --s.

Ms. Anthrope
Apr. 10, 2002, 11:32 PM
This was about 6 years ago in Florida, just a few months after I bought Mocha. The barn was fairly large, about 40 horses, and most of them got turned out at night in a large field at the back of the barn. One night something happened that spooked them and they all broke out of the field and ran out on the road where, unfortunately, a mare was hit by a truck, another two were sent flying through a restaurant window, and pretty much every one had one scratch, bruise, something. The mare that got hit died instantly but the crash was so brutal that her head and neck were disfigured beyond recognition. I have not to this day been more scared then when the phone rang at 4 am and it was a working student telling me to come down and see if I could determine if the dead horse was mine. I was hysterical when we got there, and that soon turned to a mixture of relief and horror when I saw it wasn't my baby. The mare that died was a sales prospect that belonged to our trainer, the two horses that went through the restaurant suffered minor injuries, one of those two happened to be pregnant and went into slightly early labor but she and the foal were fine. We ran around rounding up the horses and when I saw Mocha I just stood there sobbing and hugging her for what seemed like an eternity. Someone else came and helped me lead her back to the barn, since I couldn't walk. Heck, I could barely breathe. It was a horrible day, but at least we were lucky to lose only one horse in what could have been a major tragedy.

Apr. 11, 2002, 07:47 AM
Horse related but no horse hurt in the making of this accident...

This January, I'm riding down a dirt road. Beautiful sunny day, in the upper 70s (I'm in Tucson). I'm on my way to a friend's house, and there are some quail (5-6) in the road pecking at the dirt.

Not even thinking about it... (These are birds, right? They can get out of the way!) ...we walk towards the group of them (they are on my side) and most of them walk/shuffle/fly away. One particularly slow (or stupid, I don't know) didn't move very fast and Kalinka ended up stepping on his tail! What a squawk that bird made! Kalinka just looked down, snorted, and I swear I hear her think, "Stupid bird!" /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

I was laughing so hard I almost fell off...
/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif


Smile! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif It makes people wonder what you're thinking!

Apr. 11, 2002, 08:21 AM
I had to drive to an old boss's house so that he could peel a bat off the grill of my old car. There was no way I was touching it! EEEWWWWW /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

Apr. 11, 2002, 11:49 AM
Has it really been a year? How time flies when you're having fun.

A friend of mine who works for the local fire department told me this one the other day. A guy on the exit ramp of the highway hits a wild boar. Since wild boars are a protected species here, he was facing a whopping big fine for whacking and killing the wild porker. Thus, he quickly loaded the full grown wild boar(i.e. the size of a large hog) into his car where he figured he would take the boar a dispose of it in a place more discrete than the side of a highway off ramp.

Up to now, it all sounds logical and normal. Slight law breaking by avoiding his fine, but whatever. The only problem was that the boar wasn't dead! We're talking about an animal that puts the tazmanian devil to shame. Big big teeth and really pissed off...more pissed off then normal because he found himself in a car. The boar wakes up while the guy is driving, kills the guy, and destroys the car, and escapes into the woods.

Now that is a roadkill story, where the everyone but the animal would have been better off if the animal had just died!

Apr. 11, 2002, 01:39 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Medievalist:
The boar wakes up while the guy is driving, kills the guy, and destroys the car, and escapes into the woods. Medievalist<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Is this true?!? /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

I have a sad story - one time at my barn, this woman was riding in the indoor and there were some pigeons chilling around on the ground and in the rafters (they are regulars around there). The horses don't care about them and they generally stay out of the horses' way. Unfortunately, one day this woman was riding, and a pigeon took off suddenly right under her horse! Poor thing broke its neck and died /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif


Apr. 11, 2002, 01:44 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Unfortunately, one day this woman was riding, and a pigeon took off suddenly right under her horse! Poor thing broke its neck and died <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

The pigeon or the horse?

~Erin B #1
"Winny and I lived in a house that ran on static electricity... If you wanted to run the blender, you had to rub balloons on your head. If you wanted to cook, you had to pull off a sweater real quick."

Apr. 11, 2002, 01:46 PM
It flew right into the horse's chest. The horse spooked a little, but no other harm done.


Gucci Cowgirl
Apr. 11, 2002, 01:49 PM
ewwwwwwwwwwwww, you guys are grooooooooosss..lol

there are enough grotesque roadkill stories here to last me for years!! STOP THE INSANITY!!

I just recently bought a dog. I had great fun naming him "Stay". I sit on my couch and call out "Come here, Stay....Come here Stay!" I laughed when he got confused, so now he just ignores me.

Apr. 11, 2002, 01:52 PM
I have hit a few animals in my time, cried about all of them as well. The first was a dog that leapt out in front of my ex-boyfriends truck when I was driving it, I tried to miss him but the rear tire got him. The second was a deer around 3 years ago now. I was on the way out to the barn (I worked there at the time) and these 4 deer crossed the road in front of me, I tried to stop but slid on the ice. The first 2 deer got across safely but I did hit the 3rd one, I don't know where the 4th one went but I didn't even know I had killed the deer until one of the ladies came into the barn and said there was a dead deer up the road and I knew then. But on a more positive not, I didn't get killed an my truck got away with a little crack in the grill, a broken bug deflector and one of the adjuster screws for the headlight on the passenger side broke off. But I did hurt my shoulder as I had a death grip on the steering wheel. The last one was also on the way to the barn, a bird committed suicide the flying into the little space just above the bumper but before the grill. I didn't even know it was there until a guy at work pointed the lifeless little body out to me.

You know, I just finished reading every post on this message and my boss came into my office, I have never tried so hard to stop laughing in my whole life. All these visuals keep going through my mind.

[This message was edited by PaulaM on Apr. 11, 2002 at 05:12 PM.]

Jun. 24, 2002, 04:22 PM
I was riding my Arab around in the pasture one evening. The grass was tall in some places, but we were having fun, tromping through the tall places. At one bunch, however, Tod froze and swung his hind end around.

A shrill little squeal came from the grass, and Chickenbutt took off. Finally, I got him settled, and checked out--he had stepped on a baby cottontail, severing its front leg. I had a heck of a time getting him to let me back on after I stuffed the bunny into my shirt pocket. I finally got on. We did "corkscrews" all the way to the house!

I will not disclose the fate of the bunny. On the other hand, Tod's new owner mentioned to me that he had thrown a hissie fit on the trail when a rabbit hopped in front of him...hmmm, I said. Imagine that...

of all the things to hit with my blazer, back in the day

I was driving to get fitted for my wedding dress, and my two bridesmaids were with me...a 600 pound steer was standing on the shoulder of the road. I slowed down (but not much, maybe 5-10 mph) and honked. The stupid thing ran right into the center of the road--and directly at me! I swerved, the bridesmaids screamed, and the steer pivoted to run back into the ditch. I just barely hit him--his butt cracked one of my turn signal covers, broke a bolt in my bumper, and knocked my side mirror awry. Whew!

Of course, mice aren't humans, but we are very excited by the results.

I apologize for my typos. It's hard to type with one hand! Thanks for your patience

[This message was edited by stasha on Jun. 26, 2002 at 07:20 PM.]

Jun. 25, 2002, 07:12 AM
The first spring I had my new horse was a wet one and it was hard to get outside to go for a trail ride. By the time I was able to get him over to my neighbor's field the grass was more than knee deep.

Well, we are just casually walking along when all of a sudden I see something tan out of the corner of my eye.

My horse had stepped over a fawn lying in the grass (their mommies tell them to stay put and they DO stay put). He had gotten his front feet over the fawn and the fawn decided it was definitely time to SPLIT the scene. Fawn jumped up right underneath my horses belly and scooted off. Well, I'm not sure if the horse jumped straight up or if I 'pulled' him up when I nearly jumped out of my skin, but straight up about a foot or so we went.

Praise Allah that when he came down, he just meandered off as tho nothing had happened.


You know you're a horse person when...you can find your boots by smell.

Jun. 25, 2002, 02:56 PM
Let's see - all my roadkill stories are from Texas...not surprising, I guess. LOL
Once on my way to work I startled a flock of buzzards feeding on a carcass - they all exploded out of the grass, and one of them was stupid enough to fly right in front of me. I wasn't going very fast, but it was fast enough for that bird to CRASH into the windshield, leaving a spiderweb two feet across! The bird spiraled off into the bushes and I never saw it again. I sure as heck wasn't stopping to help a BUZZARD!
Another time it was late at night and a possum ran in front of me. I HATE possums - they're nasty disease ridden creatures and I decided not to swerve. Only, at the last second, I chickened out! Unfortunately, it was too late - I went bump bump...end of possum. It may have been nasty but I still felt awful! /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif
There was also the cardinal, as I was driving home one day...wide open road - no cars around...I was going the speed limit (70 mph) and this flash of red comes swooping in front of me. I hit the brakes but didn't swerve, but didn't see it reappear. Several hours later, I got home, took stuff out of the car and was going back for another load and saw a poor pathetic little bundle of feathers in my grill. /infopop/emoticons/icon_frown.gif Talk about feeling guilty!

My sister has a story too - she was driving her big Suburban home one day, when a deer dashed out of the woods, in front of her vehicle. She hit the brakes, came to a full stop, as did the deer, which promptly sauntered off the road ahead of her. She was accelerating, thinking the danger was past, when the deer CHANGED its mind, whipped around and ran smack into the SIDE of her vehicle, breaking its neck and killing itself instantly! Who says the dingbats don't have a deathwish? /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
They had venison for supper. /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif


"Because he dodges bullets, Avi!!"

Jun. 26, 2002, 12:53 PM
I must admit I have laughed harder in the last 20 minutes than I have in awhile. It is amazing how time can change perspective.

Monday my friends horse stepped on a turkey sleeping in the grass, the horse did 180 and she came off. She was wearing her helmet and is okay.

On page 3 a/o asked if anyone has driven in the Upper Pininsula of Michigan. I am originally from the western end and moved back for a couple of years as a result I have an uncanny ability to spot critters on the edges of the roads, fields etc., anyway, my dad was going to school at MTU and coming home weekends. One weekend he had car trouble so my mom went to get him. By the time she got there the car was fixed and they came home together seperatly. On the way home my mom hits a deer with her car, 20 minutes later a deer runs out in front of my dad and he hits it with his car. For 3 or 4 years we had been back and 3 of us driving at all hours hadn't hit a deer and then wham 2 deer with 2 cars 20 minutes apart. The story made our small town paper.

A/O and Goodyfourshoes are right about all the eyes peering at you, you really have to keep yours open.

Jun. 26, 2002, 03:05 PM
Make sure you roll up your windows every time you approach one on the road, because, as someone pointed out before, their takeoff time is very slow and you may end up with your own version of the wild turkey in the front seat story.

Won't relay the details of the actual event as it brings up very bad memories (ever see one of those suckers up close- I mean face to face??)

Oh, the horror.... the horror.... /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

/infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Jamie Taylor
Sep. 18, 2002, 09:09 PM
Sorry to resurrect this thread...but I had been reading this yesterday and had never actually run over an animal in the two and a half years I'd been driving. Then today, I was driving to the LA horse show and a bird dropped down in front of my car. It was quite strange, he just kind of plopped to the ground...I didn't have time to stop or swerve but he was right in the middle so I figured everything would be ok, my car would go over him but he wouldnt be hurt. Of course, I am just going over him and I hear a THUMP and a teensy jolt...The dang bird must have realized my car was going over him and taken off, right into the bottom of my car...! What a dumb animal! I felt SO BAD, but it was his own darn fault, he would have been just fine too. I just found it strange that I'd never harmed an animal, then I read this thread and BAM, dead bird on the bottom of my car...so not ok.

"Don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out alive." - Van Wilder
"You can pick your nose and pick your friends, but you can't wipe your friends on the couch."

Sep. 19, 2002, 06:11 AM
Every time I read this thread I crack up...this from someone who cried when she ran over a possum. (My boyfriend calling my car a Possum Pancake Maker for months afterwards didn't help.)

"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." -- Anonymous

Sep. 19, 2002, 06:19 AM
I never saw this thread, but because of the recent bump, it made me laugh! It also reminds me of the time I hit that bird....

One morning driving to work, two sparrows swooped in front of my truck, and only one flew away. /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif I thought the other one had go back the other way... (Wishful thinking) /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Well, 20 minutes later I get to work and happen to walk past the front of my truck and see these feet and a wing sticking out of the bumper. Boy did I feel bad for the critter. He got wedged into the bumper and I had to get someone to pull him out. Hope it was a quick death.


Looking back though it was kind of funny. Not too often you actually "catch" a bird in the bumper...

I have hit many squirrels though, I don't brake any more after I totaled my first car trying to avoid one. Can't afford that kind of sacrifice...

Life is a journey, enjoy it. Riding just makes it better!

Sep. 19, 2002, 06:32 AM
Yesterday I was driving down the main road here in the campus that goes straight through the middle of campus, so I could get to the post office. Well, you have to stop for pedestrians here- they walk right out in front of you, whether you're paying attention or not. So as I am preparing to move, suddenly, a squirrel (who is LOOKING at me through my window no less!) starts to walk across the street. Traffic stops for him. He just keeps on a lookin' at me. Everyone in the area just starts laughing their rears off. I knew that the campus squirrels were domisticated (they read playboys and the like), but never in my life expected THAT out of one!


"Half the failures in life arise from pulling in one's horse as he is leaping."~ Julius Hare

Sep. 19, 2002, 08:53 AM
OMG...I don't think I've ever tried so hard NOT to laugh in my life. I about spit a sip of water on my computer screen. My coworkers officially think I'm nuts!

Now, for my addition to the Roadkill Hall of Fame:
I was the DD at a friend's party a few years ago, and was volunteered to make a beer run when they ran out. I drove my friend's car since mine was blocked in, and 2 of my friends went with me. We're driving down a back country 2-lane road at 11:30 p.m. to go to the all-night drive through, when suddenly, I see some motion to the left of the road. It happened so fast, there was hardly time to react - a deer jumped out and ran across the road. I slammed on the brakes, but just barely hit him - caught his hind end with the right corner of the car. There was a THUD, and I saw something fly up over the car. The deer hobbled off into the woods (never saw him again), and we stopped to check the damage. The grill was broken, headlight cracked, fur stuck in the front...but the grossest thing we found was when we walked behind the car. A few feet back, the deer's RIGHT HIND LEG lay in the middle of the road! That's what flew up over the car! I had totally SEVERED this stupid deer's leg.

I doubt he lived. I was messed up for days. I can't imagine what would have happened if I, the DD, hadn't been making that beer run. /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

That's the only thing I've ever hit, thankfully, aside from some already-dead roadkill smooshed to the road.

Sep. 19, 2002, 09:49 AM
So dogchushu and Goodytowshoes get to be president and vice president of the Bunny Killer Clique.

Sep. 19, 2002, 10:42 AM
I was reading some of these to my bf, when he broke out in a Phish song:

"Possum...possum....your head is the ROAD!"

and of course, my favorite:
"You got your dead cats and you got your dead dogs, on a moonlit night you got your dead toad frogs" - "Dead skunk in the middle of the road"

Sep. 19, 2002, 10:59 AM
This thread always comes back to haunt me..just like the vision of the bunny stuck to my grill.

To prove there IS karma - the bunny-killing station wagon's engine imploded on the highway this past summer, so bugs got his bit in.

To this day, when my hubby calls me at work, he says "hey killer, how's it going?". He and his family will never let me forget it, because they hunt and I have never been a fan. And there I go and do that!!!!

Sep. 19, 2002, 01:51 PM
Thanks Flash, I was hoping to forget my bunny killing experience! But since you brought it up... /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Last Monday, I was mowing my lawn and (yup, you guessed it) I ran over a baby bunny. Yes, very gross. Yes, very sad. But it gets worse.

I was using a little manual push mower, so it didn't really have the power to completely destroy the bunny. Nope, I just mortally wounded the poor thing. The bunny's front end was still working, but its back end was paralyzed (I think I must have severed its spinal cord).

I was very upset. However, the dozen or so 8-10 year old children playing right next to my lawn were horrified! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

Kids were crying, shrieking, wailing. And I was wondering how I was going to put the poor baby bunny out of its misery.

I knew was I was not about to pick it up with my bare hands. So I reached through my front door to grab a pair of gloves. And, in the process, let the dogs out.

So there I am, chasing a 1/2 paralyzed baby bunny down the sidewalk (a 1/2 paralyzed baby bunny that has suddenly gotten much much faster) while trying to keep my dogs from running into the street.

Children are still crying, shrieking, wailing.

Then, suddenly, my younger dog runs between my legs, snatches up the poor baby bunny, and shakes it. Killed it about instantly.

Children stop crying, shrieking, wailing, and begin SCREAMING! Moms come running outside to see whatever is the matter.

Everyone is yelling "bad doggie." I am thinking "thank you doggie--now I don't have to kill the bunny." Doggie is prancing around in a most lovely extended trot showing off his fresh baby bunny kill! /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Finally, we buried the bunny under a flower bush with a lot of snifling and moms saying the bunny is in heaven now. Lots of angry looks at the "bad doggie."

Of course, I have been informed by one of the mothers that I will probably get no trick or treaters this year! I am the scarey bunny killing lady! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

So don't feel bad Goodyfourshoes, at least you didn't traumatize young children with your bunny kill.

Flashy Gray
Sep. 19, 2002, 02:18 PM
I can't breathe. I am just laughing too hard. After my awful week with an animal on the verge of death I don't know why I am laughing at this but it's just so .... bizarre and funny.

God bless this thread!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Sep. 19, 2002, 02:23 PM
A family friend of ours was at school the other day (I'm guessing he's about 2nd grade) and some kid had brought in his dad's favourite homing pigeon for Show and Tell.

So the class goes outside and releases the pigeon whereupon a red-tailed hawk comes swooping down and just nails the thing right in fornt of the horrified group of kids, then proceeds to sit on the front of the school and eat it. Blood and feathers everywhere. Major freakout...

There was a lot of coughing and lip-biting when the parents were informed (and out and out laughter later behind closed doors) and the kids, being kids, will probably forget all about it in a week, the poor teacher on the other hand may never recover..... /infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

Sep. 19, 2002, 07:23 PM
this shouldn't be funny, but it is for some sick reason.

"If all goes well, you've overlooked something."
"Humpty Dumpty was pushed."

Sep. 19, 2002, 07:35 PM
This is the funniest thread I've ever seen!

I live a block from a lake, and oftentimes the ducks walk up the street and into the yards. One time I counted 40 ducks in our yard! Anyway, I was backing out of the driveway and drove over a duck. I made my dad pick it up.

Another time a suicidal little birdie flew into my truck and like someone else posted, was surprised to not see the bird fly up after it hit me. Yep, you guessed it, when I got home I had fried birdie inside my grill. And yep, you guessed it, I had my dad get it out.

I hit a deer once with my little Toyota Corolla. It appeared out of nowhere. The deer died, and the only damage to my car (unbelievably) was having to pay $14 for a new light.

I also hit a dog once when it's owners let it out of the house, and it ran right into the street in front of my car. Luckily I was going pretty slow. The dog got up and walked up to the house.

One time I was a passenger in someone's truck and I was sticking my head out of the window (wearing my sunglasses), and a big bug hit my glasses and squashed all over the lens.

"No matter where you go, there you are"

Sep. 19, 2002, 07:35 PM
This isn't really the same.....

I was in 3rd grade, and my rather, um...I dunno, weird friend brought a parakeet to school. Now, something happened to it or something, it got mortally wounded, and she called her dad and he told her to wring it's neck. Um.....?!?!? And she DID. I just remember riding home on the bus...sitting next to the dead parakeet. Crazy /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

* B E L E N *
*Larks Caruso* / *Every So Often*
The brave may not live forever, but the cautious don't live at all.

Sep. 19, 2002, 08:11 PM
ROFLMAO my boyfriend recently told me of his friend who did the EXACT same thing you did , same situation, same placement of bunny, everything...
oh man.... SORRY I would freak out too! Shniffy.

"We came, we rode, we conquered."
*Member of the TB Clique, Young Trainers clique and the Disgruntled College Student Clique.*

Sep. 19, 2002, 08:35 PM
Maggymay, I am LMAO! The mental picture of the poor hapless pigeon and the hungry hawk is absolutely hysterical!
Thank you for making my day!
Yes, folks, I am sick. I'm getting it looked into, don't worry. /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif


"Because he dodges bullets, Avi!!"

Sep. 20, 2002, 01:19 PM
Years ago my boyfriend and I decided to get married the following Tuesday on his birthday. At work on Wednesday, a computer tape fell out of a rack and hit me above the lip. I got sent to a doctor ("NO stiches-I'm eloping netxt week!") but since flesh was missing I got sent to a plastic surgeon. She put four tiny little stitches in my lip (and congratulated me on my up-coming elopement- "we'll take the stitches out the day before"). I notify boyfriend. After work, I head out to feed the horse. It's toward the end of November, very dark already, I'm in four lanes of traffic and a kamikaze deer jumps out in front of my car. I pull over, deer is twitching in the road. A cop comes, sees the stitches in my lip, and asks if I was hurt. I'm more worried about the still-twitching deer. The cop asks if I want it. Yeah, I'll just grab my knife in my teeth and wade in dressed in my skirt and heels and field dress it. (I told him to give it to charity or anything.) Very calmly I file my report. Very calmly I drive the smashed car home. I get into the apartment, take one look at BF, and break down sobbing "I killed Bambi's mother!"

It took a trip to the parking lot for him to figure out what the heck his soon-to-be-bride was hysterical about.

Sep. 20, 2002, 01:29 PM
Goodyfourshoes and Dogchushu you've brightened up my friday. May all the animals maimed or killed by COTH posters rest in peace. /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

"Friends don't let friends reply to all"

Sep. 20, 2002, 01:46 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Jynx:
I'm more worried about the still-twitching deer. The cop asks if I want it. Yeah, I'll just grab my knife in my teeth and wade in dressed in my skirt and heels and field dress it. .<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

HEE heee heee Ho Ho Ho...I have this bizarre mental picture...oh dear it must be Friday....

/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Sep. 20, 2002, 03:30 PM
This thread is hilarious (although, somewhat sickening)!

I hit a bunny last summer on the way to the barn; it ran so fast in front of me that I couldn't even brake. I shrieked, looked in the rearview mirror, and saw that it's leg was up in the air doing a little dance. It was awful, I got to the barn in hysterics...... "hicc-Ijust-sobhicc-kill-hic-BUNNNNYYYYY!!"

Sep. 20, 2002, 07:27 PM
You guys are just the kind of people some of my sick college friends would love! You see, there is this group of immature guys who once decided to have a little fun with a stuffed skunk (fake), a fishing pole, and a freeway. Said immature guys perch themselves atop an overpass, attach said fake skunk to the fishing line, and toss the thing overboard. Skunk lands on freeway, and they begin to reel it in. Cars begin swerving, brakes screeching; I'm sure that the one thought on the mind of every driver was "DO NOT KILL THAT SKUNK!" Immature guys found it to be completely hysterical...until the cops showed up and escorted them away. /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

*"The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - The unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable." - Oscar Wilde

Sep. 21, 2002, 03:42 PM
So, anyone here familiar with the phrase "Bucks by Buick?"

My family's favorite roadkill story is of my sister, when she was in college. Driving through a less desirable part of town, speeding slightly, she hit a stray cat. (Did I mention this was at night??) Utterly hysterical, she leaps from the car, whips off her shirt, and bundles the cat (obviously dead) off to the closest vet. While I have had my share of guilt filled nights over bunnycide and the like, I'm laugh every time I think about this story. What did the vet think when confronted with my sister (who shall we say, has been blessed with "vast tracks of land?")

*Sometimes I think the so-called expets actually ARE experts.*