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View Full Version : I Need Help - Beginner Rider/Unsafe Horse



LockeMeadows
Apr. 6, 2012, 12:28 AM
Oh my. We have a boarder that has a coming 4yo, basically unhandled Draft/Tb cross; well over 16.2H. They owned the horse before boarding with us and plan on sending the horse into training this spring. My SO is good horse person on the ground, but is a complete beginner under saddle. His 13 daughter can w/t/c and jump around small jumps, but is still very much a beginner herself. Imagine my shock and horror when I read on her facebook (while I was at work) that they "worked" said unhandled 4yo today. When I called home in a panic, my SO said they talked to the owner last week and got the ok to work with the horse. It sounds like it did not go well. I am not good with this on so many levels. First, I'm not crazy for this horse to even be in our fields. He is not a "quiet" baby and seems to be missing some brains. Second, I can not help them, as I am getting my ammy status back, and don't want to risk anything. However, even if I was training, this horse would not be something I would even want an exprienced ammy working with, let alone beginners. They are going to get themselves killed. Of course, after watcing War Horse, both of them are ready to train something from scratch. :rolleyes:

I called SO multiple times tonight from work begging him to promise me they won't touch this horse again. He would not make any promises. I'm about to call the owner and have said horse removed before someone gets hurt. This horse is not safe and they don't seem to "get it".

We had already talked about getting the daughter a project horse this year, but this was not what I had in mind. :no:

alto
Apr. 6, 2012, 12:47 AM
They owned the horse before boarding with us and plan on sending the horse into training this spring.

Spring started a few weeks ago, get this horse gone if SO & DD don't get why horse is dangerous.
Then go find that (safe) project horse for them to be busy with ;)

JanM
Apr. 6, 2012, 06:44 AM
Wow! So the owner is letting two beginners 'train' the greenie? And a greenie missing maturity and a few marbles? I think you're right about telling the owner to get the horse off your property now. I agree with alto-the owner isn't sending anyone to training, but trying to get free training in the guise of being nice enough to let two other people risk life and limb riding the horse. And when something goes wrong, the horse gets hurt or hurts someone else guess who is going to start screaming lawsuit for the injury, and trying to sue your fannies off for the damage to their potential Olympic mount (aren't they all potential Olympic mounts when you get to court)?

twhs
Apr. 6, 2012, 08:40 AM
I remember you from your shows 2 summers back and remember you as a kind and sensible person so I can see that you are defiinitely in a difficult situation. All COTHers, are correct and agree with you that this horse needs to be off your property ASAP I'm just hoping that you spare no feelings that might be necessary in accomplishing this as quickly as possible. Am sure you SO will abide by your wishes in staying away from the horse but male egos being what they are, there could easily be a slip up. With the 13 year old -- oh my! You know how 13-year olds like to be independent and think they know more than adults. Maybe a bribe -- "stay away from this horse while we search for another and if you don't, there won't be another that you can call your own???" Easiest & best fix here while avoiding any conflicts in your relationship(s) is removing this horse.

Hoping to read a post from you soon saying how the horse is off your property and energy is now being spent looking for a horse for the 13 year old.

All that said, it's good hearing from you.

Beam Me Up
Apr. 6, 2012, 08:41 AM
Agree with the other posters that the best solution to this situation is for the horse to move on, hopefully to full training.

IMO the bigger issue for you, though, is that your SO is acting irresponsibly in several ways (making deals with boarders behind your back, misrepresenting his/his daughter's skillsets and risking their safety, etc.). I think you need to work through those issues before you bring in a new boarder, both for liability and peace of mind.

LockeMeadows
Apr. 6, 2012, 10:30 AM
Thank you for your quick responses. SO is mad at me that I am "dwelling" on this and there is no longer a problem. All of the horses are our barn are fairly safe (if there is such a thing). He is used to nice animals and I don't think he understands how truly dangerous the situation can become and how fast that can happen.

VCT
Apr. 6, 2012, 11:36 AM
You need to get the horse gone. I have a DH basically in the same boat.

He does quite well with handling horses on the ground - the horses we own and our long term boarders. Who are all quite polite, kind souls.

He doesn't listen when there is a horse who comes in for boarding or training that needs to be handled more cautiously. He has gotten bit hard once, and run down/over once. He's had other close calls over the years that only resulted in nothing because of the good manners of the horse.

He doesn't get it and may never get it. He is lucky he hasn't been hurt worse. I have gotten ALOT more picky about horses I allow on the property due to this. I may be able to handle them and not get hurt, but DH is at risk with horses who don't have manners or a kind heart and a sensible mind.

Guess who is more important? :)

Anselcat
Apr. 6, 2012, 01:38 PM
Rent a copy of the Buck Brannaman documentary. Show them the section where the palomino turns on and attacks the guy on the ground. Tell them -- this is how fast it can happen when the horse does not have basic training.

Or this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqZ4UUDoZGs

BabyGreen
Apr. 6, 2012, 01:45 PM
Is it your farm, or the SO's?

hollyhorse2000
Apr. 6, 2012, 01:51 PM
Sigh. It sounds a bit like you have a relationship problem masquerading as a horse problem. You're not the first and certainly not the last. Only you can decide how much of a problem the relationship is (or how much it's worth to you). If he's not listening to you, then it might be time to bite your lip and let him learn from experience.

Renting the Branaman movie is a great idea, but certainly don't say you're renting it to show him you're right. Just rent it for your own education and OHMIGOD, honey, did you just see that. Let's rewind. Wow, that's incredible . . .

Get horse shopping for the 13 year old and that problem gets solved immediately.

BabyGreen
Apr. 6, 2012, 01:53 PM
Looks from your website that you're married to him. Good thing WV is not a community property state. Hope he has medical insurance. Does daughter reside with you full time? He may be a part time dad trying to impress.

Seems like you and hubby need a serious sit-down for a meeting of the minds about who runs the farm.

kmwines01
Apr. 6, 2012, 03:35 PM
I understand why you want the horse gone, but it really isn't the owners fault that your SO doesn't get it. Who knows how he represented himself to the horse's owner? May have told them he had your full approval. I understand the owner has to get the horse under control but what in your boarding agreement says you can ask them to leave because your SO and his daughter dont have common sense and good self preservation?

enjoytheride
Apr. 6, 2012, 04:53 PM
You are a boarding barn. You have the responsiblity to take in horses that are a good fit for your barn. However, you are also responsible for making sure your barn workers are experienced around those horses and that your inexperienced clients follow the barn rules.

You might have a horse that is not a good match for your farm, but you more likely have a relationship problem.

If your SO was a paid worker and he brought his kid to work with him and the both of them messed with a horse they were told not to mess with, caused a problem, and then messed with it again you would fire them.

I think looking at how your relationship works needs to come first, and looking at your clients needs to come second.

Griffyn
Apr. 6, 2012, 05:08 PM
Sadly the "spring training" promised, has shown up in the form of your SO and child. Talk with the horse owner about where its going and when, pronto.

AlyssaSpellman
Apr. 6, 2012, 07:22 PM
Is it your farm, or the SO's?

This is what I'm curious to find out, too.
I understand that you'd want the horse gone, but in all honesty, it IS your responsibility to make sure you know what kind of horse is being brought to your farm. If the horses owners completely misrepresented the horse, fine. But if you didn't bother to find out what kind of horse was coming to your facility, or you knew what you were "getting yourself into" before the horse came, it isn't the boarders fault and therefore I don't see why everyone thinks the answer is kicking the horse out.
If it is your farm, make a rule saying that unless they get direct permission from you, nobody is allowed to ride a horse besides the horses owner. Or even just tell them, "It's my farm, and you can't ride this horse." I understand that you have a personal relationship with your SO and his daughter but there's still a line when it comes to running a business.

CVPeg
Apr. 6, 2012, 08:13 PM
Renting the Branaman movie is a great idea, but certainly don't say you're renting it to show him you're right. Just rent it for your own education and OHMIGOD, honey, did you just see that. Let's rewind. Wow, that's incredible . . .

Get horse shopping for the 13 year old and that problem gets solved immediately.

Perfect.

findeight
Apr. 7, 2012, 01:05 PM
Number one is you have to get SOs DD a horse. Whatever way you can. Make it her (more or less) exclusive project, take her mind off that Greenie. You, unfortunately, cannot tell her what to do, she is not your DD and have no idea if Dad has full custody or is playing fairy godparent gifting the part time child with whatever she wants....often to get back at the ex who cannot afford the lavish extras.

That is probably your worst problem, the rest you should be able to deal with. Although I doubt you will have a ton of luck telling a grown man who thinks he knows what he is doing otherwise

Not the boarders fault, they said it was Green. But who, exactly, was going to train it? A free lancer coming to your property? If so, that would be a good deal as SOs DD could take a lesson on that other horse you get for her.

OP, you gotta problem here and that horse is the least of it. BTDT. Twice. Thank the Lord I only married one of them:no:.

Prime Time Rider
Apr. 7, 2012, 06:49 PM
It's your farm and you don't have to keep any boarder you're not comfortable having. If you have a contract requiring 30 days notice, give them notice.

I have a small farm and we have had boarders in the past. I never had trouble with any of them except one gelding who was out right dangerous. When he was turned out he would turn around and kick out, even when facing the fence or gate. The owner rarely came out, and when she did she never rode the horse. It quickly became apparent to me that the owner wasn't comfortable with the horse and it was just a mtter of time before someone got hurt. I politely asked the boarder to fuind another boarding arrangement.

However, if your SO and his daughter are attempting to take on this green four year old horse as their "project" it is entirely a different matter. It doesn't sound like the problem is the boarder, the problem is your SO.

LockeMeadows
Apr. 8, 2012, 12:00 PM
The farm belongs to my SO, and his DD lives with us full time. She HAS a horse (a very fancy Large pony that is a dead-broke saint), but wants a "project horse". However, after talking to SO and DD, they were pretty freaked out by the horse and neither want to play with him again. I believe they are being completely honest.

Somermist
Apr. 8, 2012, 12:24 PM
The farm belongs to my SO, and his DD lives with us full time. She HAS a horse (a very fancy Large pony that is a dead-broke saint), but wants a "project horse". However, after talking to SO and DD, they were pretty freaked out by the horse and neither want to play with him again. I believe they are being completely honest.

Excellent. Very glad they have thought this over before someone got hurt.

nightsong
Apr. 9, 2012, 01:12 AM
Don't trust so and daughter to stick with this opinion. They may well get over their fear, have second thoughts, or decide, "THIS is how to handle it." Problem STILL remains, in ALL its forms.