View Full Version : Going insane having to take it easy while on my meds

Couture TB
Mar. 31, 2010, 03:26 PM
This nice weather is driving me mad. And my poor husband is probably ready to reach for my valium I use to sleep just having to deal with me.

For those of you that don't know I am being treated for lyme disease on IV treatment. And I keep being told to take it easy by my family. It is killing me having to try to take it easy.

Training horses is easy. Sitting on my butt is hard! :lol:

Though these meds better work for the $450 we have to pay out of pocket since the insurance company isn't covering it. They said they would then 3 weeks in said that since I got 30 days of it last year that is all I get in my LIFETIME. We are going to fight them tooth and nail to pay for the 3 weeks that I have done, that they pre approved and are now saying they aren't going to pay for:mad:

Plus nothing like injecting heprin in your body every day to make you bruise easily.

Mar. 31, 2010, 11:46 PM
Egad, do I appreciate what you are going through!

I think the enforced veggitating is the hardest part. When I am being quiet and "lounging about", my mind is going along at ninety miles an hour, coming up with Things that should be Done Right Now. If I move, or stand, then the rest of my body says, "Hmmm, I Don't Think So" and turns in to a puddle, forcing the brain to return to the great gray fog. If I let determination go the way of trying to do more than my body wants, I pay.

Perhaps you might feel up to writing down segments and thoughts about aspects of your teaching. Think of it as developing lesson plans. You can form an outline first if that makes it easier. If you put it on a computer, it will be easier to come back later and review the different pieces and edit and rewrite them. You can also do it by voice and use voice recognition software.

You have buddies on the forum. Use us to play with ideas. Maybe a sentence or two is easier at a time. You can do it by pm or arrange a playtime on i.m. (Instant Messenger).

I will think of more if you want to p.m. me.

Take courage!

I know you have the determination. It just is hard and amazingly boring.

DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"
Apr. 1, 2010, 02:41 AM
whicker gave you some great ideas - I'm in if you think my feedback will be useful!

Apr. 1, 2010, 03:41 AM
This may seem totally silly, but I like to design courses for specific horses or just in general. Sometimes I set up the nastiest GP course I can think of and then I'll try to design something for a horse who is having trouble coming back to the rider on course, etc.

I can't say anyone would want to ride these courses but it's a good exercise for my brain when I can't get out there to do it in person. Besides, it's fun to dwell on a particular horse's needs and how to strengthen them!

I also like to do research on weird injuries or diseases I've read about. It's not the same as handling it in person but if you ever come across it you have a depth of understanding that can do you good.

Zu Zu
Apr. 1, 2010, 11:19 AM
I know it is close to:eek: impossible for horse people to be "on hold" but be patient it will be worth the wait. Take comfort in your animals ~ cats & dogs... Jingles that the time flies by for you.:D

Couture TB
Apr. 1, 2010, 12:38 PM
Thanks guys. I have started to write lesson plans and goals for my students. Tonight for the first time since March 15th I will be going out to the stable, I get to go as long as I behave I am told. Lol. I promised to just sit there, and watch and tell my one student what to do (she is riding one of the horses for the first time outside this year, and it is spring and he is a stallion) instead of just getting on and doing it myself. And I get to see my coming 2yr for the first time since surgery. I am told he has grown a lot.

Next week I even get to sit and give a couple lessons as long as I behave tonight. So I will behave, I will behave : )

The problem is I am an active teacher. I don't just sit and give a lesson , I tend to walk around adjust them if they are having a problem with the horse to many times I will get on and show them.

I can do this though. Honestly I tink I can.

Right now I have a saddle sitting out in front of my apt with a good oiling on it. Dropping off my aussie saddle and one of my monoflap saddles at tack sale next weekend so nice and clean and well oiled.

Couture TB
Apr. 1, 2010, 10:10 PM
My husband took me out to the stable tonight. Was out there for two hours. It was really hard to not do things. Like clean the tack room and such. Gave one of my students who was out exercising the horse she is showing this year a mini lesson. ie a lesson without money:lol: Helped her work the stallion outside for the first time for her ever and the first of the year for him. He went from being Mr. Calm hunter boy, to Mr. Destracted and needing to be pushed forward:lol: She did very well with him. Was very proud of her.

I pretty much behaved, honest. Even behaved enough for my husband to say she could pick me up tomorow night if I was doing well (I am really tired and a little sore) so I can help her work him outside again.

Apr. 1, 2010, 11:03 PM
Hard to behave,isn't it? :winkgrin:

I am glad you got out today. It makes the effort to get well worth it, I hope. The tricky part is not coming physically to the aid of the rider... It is so much a part of you as an instructor. So, gold stars in your crown, Sleeping Beauty!

Please pretend that you are a horse on stall rest. Don't go galloping out in the pasture, please...:)

Couture TB
Apr. 1, 2010, 11:35 PM
Hard to behave,isn't it? :winkgrin:

I am glad you got out today. It makes the effort to get well worth it, I hope. The tricky part is not coming physically to the aid of the rider... It is so much a part of you as an instructor. So, gold stars in your crown, Sleeping Beauty!

Please pretend that you are a horse on stall rest. Don't go galloping out in the pasture, please...:)

Whicker you hit the horse shoe nail on the head:D It took so much to get myself to not be an 'active' instructor. I have never been able to be one that could sit while teaching.

Stall rest. That is a good way of puting it. Don't worry this Sleeping Beauty (or Sleeping Trainer?) is going to be on stall rest until 4:30pm and then I get to be 'hand walked' ie picked up to supervise my student and sit while I help her. I promise, well at least I promise to do it as well as possible:D

DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"
Apr. 2, 2010, 02:36 AM
Well, what would be your equivalent of an Uncle Jimmy's hanging ball?

Apr. 2, 2010, 08:24 AM
I gotta question! What are your exact exercise limitations? Did you clarify this exactly with your docs? Yes I understand not disturbing the IV site or straining/lifting or even moderate exercise but.....why not walking? Light exercise? Standing & teaching "lightly" shouldn't be a problem; or at least I don't see how not? Walking is probably not contraindicated. It might help, improve your fatigue in a good way (endorphins & all!), improve your endurance, get you moving again!

I understand not feeling like it, being tired maybe, or having your joints hurting or whatever but I think you should explore your activity limitations more. Perhaps we all have a different definition of "take it easy"!! :winkgrin:

Oh and the heparin you are using before & after for flushing is a very dilute and small amount. It's probably only in your system for an hour max. It's short acting and not likely to affect your overall coagulation but only affects the immediate injection area. No bruising should be occurring. UNLESS....you ARE on anticoagulation level doses...then you'd be getting IV doses more often and SHOULD be avoiding bruising opportunities. Heparin doses are not all equal = ask your IV Nurse!

Anyway, keep mentally & physically occupied. That's the ticket!!! :D

Couture TB
Apr. 2, 2010, 11:28 AM
pretty much my limitations are what my body can handle. For instance 2 weeks ago I wandered around to 3 stores over a couple of hours and by the end I was slurring my speach, stumbling, and then passed out on the way home.

I do go for a 30min walk every day with my dog, as long as I am not going to try to go to the stable that night.

I went to the stable last night and did the least amount that I have ever done, and I am tired today.
The thing is it varies day by day what I can do. If I over do it one day I am down for quite a few.

I pretty much am the stall rested horse, who gets to be hand walked but not ridden:lol:

I was use to puting in long days with never stopping even when I was going down hill. I would just push harder, but in the end it made it worse.

I seem to be getting better though. I don't tire as easily, but like I said just those few hours of walking around and standing I had to go sit in the car after about 2 hrs because I was tired and knew if I kept trying even to stand and pet the horses I would be falling asleep on the way home.

So pretty much play each day by ear/feeling/ what I am going to do later that day. So if I am going to the stable at night I skip being more active during the day.

DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"
Apr. 2, 2010, 01:18 PM
What I worry about is when you are off stall rest are you going to go nutso in the paddock?

Apr. 2, 2010, 06:02 PM
Maybe we gotta to tranq you for the first couple of hours in the paddock so you don't jump the fence.:eek:

Apr. 2, 2010, 07:07 PM
LOL, I am not sure if hanging balls in this context work so well

(and now I am being good)

Do all the things that are left in the dust in the active lifestyle.

Cultivate the 'doing nothing'

'ZEN in the Martial Arts' by John Hyams is a great book that has just been brought back to my attention, not Martial Arts oriented, but slap full of life's little lessons. It should keep you busy for an hour - seriously, not much longer.

Learn a new language, if rosetta stone is out of your budget, there are economy programs. Speech recognition is fun to play with.

If you have a Hallmark sense of words, I might need your input...;)

Or write the all-American horse novel.

Or crochet ear nets...

This is your opportunity to do things you are usually to busy (as in 'not still enough) to do.

And I feel for you. Being laid up, I usually have the most drive to get things done!

Couture TB
Apr. 2, 2010, 11:24 PM
Maybe we gotta to tranq you for the first couple of hours in the paddock so you don't jump the fence.:eek:

Hey I take Valium to sleep at night, and sometimes that doesn't even help. Heck I still remember being so angry when I re fractured the my ankle that the doctor gave me 30mg of Valium and it didn't even calm me down.
So sorry kids, this girl is not a cheap date to drug and turn out in the pature:lol:

The best thing to get me to take it easy is the threat from my husband that he will drive me car up to my fathers and leave me with no way to get out of the house.

As for the hanging balls.....Well I could make many comments about that but I might get banned from the forum:D

Haven's Edge
Apr. 3, 2010, 12:46 AM
GQ sorry to hear about your "stall rest" . How much longer of treatment and such? I don't know much about lyme disease but sure sounds debilitating. I like the working on lesson plan ideas and heck you could also design a few "fantasy" jumps and some courses.. kinda like The Art of the Jump Course. maybe think of what you would like to see in a world class course.
Hope you take it very easy when you do get out to the barn.. not worth having a relapse from pushing yourself too soon.

DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"
Apr. 3, 2010, 01:59 AM
Or think about writing a book. Try a new angle. How to establish yourself as a trainer. Or something along the lines of the $700 pony stories.

Apr. 3, 2010, 07:58 AM
Take it easy, this too will pass.

Couture TB
Apr. 3, 2010, 08:23 AM
Thanks everyone. On the days I feel well enough I am going to SIT (as much as possible) out at the stable to either help the couple of students I still have, or give them lessons.

$700 pony? Heck I don't usually go over $600 LOL My first pony cost $75 and here is a picture of him and I when I was 5 and he was 4 http://i297.photobucket.com/albums/mm205/MattsonTraining/rustmefirstshow.jpg and me on him when I was definilty geting to big!

Yes, the lesson/ workout plans for my students have been what I have been doing. Even going to leave the camera out there so that they can tape themselves when I am not there, then I can watch what they are doing and what needs work, even if I can't give them a lesson that week.

Heaven's Edge:

That is exactly why I am not trying to push myself to hard. If my body becomes resistant to these drugs I am in trouble as they are the only ones that work for me so far. So I wait. I have 12 more weeks of this, but the good news is that if I recognize the signs of getting to tired or don't do things on my bad days I am allowed to do more things the further into the treatment I get.

Though I must say having to tape plastic over my dressing and port kinda sucks since I have to do it everytime I shower.

The place doing my new meds gets here today. They are doing it at the cost of what the insurance pays them : about $350 a week. They offer this for lyme patients who's insurance won't cover treatment. The pharmacys around here want $315/ a day!

Though one of the downsides of feeling better is my insomnia is coming back. Anyone have a good suggestion for sleeping pills? I have done the herbal thing, the valium thing (helps sometimes), lunesta, and the other big one which I can't remember it's name, and the only thing that kinda helps is the valium with sleepy time tea.

Apr. 4, 2010, 11:01 AM
Valium is not a sleeping pill. Traditional sleeping pills really work well altho' many of us only need the shorter acting ones to just FALL asleep. The newer ones really rock! I'vem used Ambien and found the smallest dose (5mg as opposed to 10mg) very effective. Always use the smallest effective dose.

Insomnia is a VERY common problem and symptom. It can be caused by many, many co-existing conditions. It's VERY common during menopause or during life stressing times. Certainly medical illness is one of the worst life stressors. Stress has many physical manifestations. For me its been insomnia during a divorce. Many of us with chronic illness get depressed and insomnia is a hallmark of chronic depression. Hence my suggestion that you consider antidepressants as a treatment for insomnia. Works for me! The Serum Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitors class are fabulous! SSRI's take several weeks to get in your system and work but wow I just loves that "glass is half full" feeling of contentment and the feeling I can really cope.

Any of us w/chronic illness should talk to our docs about it. You may have to play with the meds & doses but please give it a try. It helps!
Best wishes Gallant on your battles! Your spirit will get -R- done!!!