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danceranddiggety
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:09 PM
This topic was brought up on another board, and we found one example of it happening. Has anyone else met a sex crazed horse that feels the need to choke his chickens on occasion? The topic came up because I witnessed my barn's JRT going at it with himself a couple of mornings ago, and as it turns out the board also has a budgie and a rooster with special friends. Has anyone else witnessed this phenomenon?

Because at the point where you can comprehend how incomprehensible it all is, you're about as smart as you need to be. - Trudy The Search For Signs....

danceranddiggety
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:09 PM
This topic was brought up on another board, and we found one example of it happening. Has anyone else met a sex crazed horse that feels the need to choke his chickens on occasion? The topic came up because I witnessed my barn's JRT going at it with himself a couple of mornings ago, and as it turns out the board also has a budgie and a rooster with special friends. Has anyone else witnessed this phenomenon?

Because at the point where you can comprehend how incomprehensible it all is, you're about as smart as you need to be. - Trudy The Search For Signs....

AAJumper
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:12 PM
Actually, yes! I've seen one rock his hips back and forth, hitting himself in the stomach! He was a gelding, but a very studish one.

x
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:13 PM
Fairly common for stallions to do this.

OnyxThePony
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:14 PM
Yep, mares too.

aaaaaand, now my Ms don't work... ost of the tie...

mcmIV
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:19 PM
It's actually got a chapter in the "Why Does My Horse...." book. I was a little bit mortified at first, but apprarently it's a legit topic.

martha

Proud member of the * Hoof Fetish Clique *

I got an album....started at least! http://community.webshots.com/user/mcmiv

Midge
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:26 PM
Sadly, yes. Tail braiding seems to encourage it. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

****
Just because you're not paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

Daventry
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:40 PM
Several studies have found that the majority of stallions will masturbate approx. 6 times a day. Lots of geldings will do so while being groomed, etc.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Daventry Farms
www.daventryfarms.com (http://www.daventryfarms.com)
Quality sport horses and ponies!

Evalee Hunter
Jun. 11, 2003, 03:43 PM
We have a gelding that ejaculates! This amazed me.

www.rougelandfarm.com (http://www.rougelandfarm.com) Home of TB stallion Alae Rouge, sire of our filly Rose, ribbon-winner on the line at Dressage at Devon.

Shiaway
Jun. 11, 2003, 04:00 PM
IRL people know me as a reserved, polite little girl who would blush when using any word related to "sex" in a conversation.

So imagine me a few years ago when I began lessons at a new dressage barn. I was going to be riding a stallion school master and was grooming him on the Xties.

I noticed he had dropped, but being the sensitive, embarresed girl that I was/am I didn't dare make him put it up so I just hoped no one would walk by.

Of course the stiffening and flapping the stomach begins. I'm now looking in every direction hoping that my trainer (who intimidates me terrily!) doesn't walk by.

All of a sudden the horse ejaculates a stream right through is front legs. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif I was mortified!! I stood holding the brush and staring at the horse in horror thinking I had done something very wrong!

Now that I've been there a while I know the ropes better and actually this guy in particular is very smart. I wouldn't put it passed him to do something like this just because it was my first time riding him. He is like that.

-------
"I won't use words again,
They don't mean what I meant.
They don't say what I said."
-Susan Vega

Chanda
Jun. 11, 2003, 04:04 PM
My 'gelding' does all the time. My trainer thinks he is proud cut.

www.clospepe.com (http://www.clospepe.com)

SBT
Jun. 11, 2003, 06:25 PM
Yep. I've ridden a stallion and a gelding that did the "stomach banging" thing. The stallion's was particularly embarrassing. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif Do you really think they "know" what they're doing, or just scratching an itch, so to speak? Also, while I know grooming is relaxing, horses don't generally do any mutual-grooming prior to mating. What's the link? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

Bugs-n-Frodo
Jun. 11, 2003, 06:34 PM
I used to work with a QH stallion who did it all of the time. It seemed like every time I saw him, he was doing it. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

~Amy, Bugs and Frodo~

mst
Jun. 11, 2003, 07:16 PM
im a parent in denial..lol

Lord Helpus
Jun. 11, 2003, 07:23 PM
After years of being in TB breeding, I just found out last year that the famous stallion named Woodman (out of "Playmate") was NOT named that because he was in the logging trade....

Boy did I feel stupid that I seemed to be the only one who had not figured that out.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I CAN spell, I just can't type and I am too blind to proofread InfoPop's teeny tiny font. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

fullmoon fever
Jun. 11, 2003, 07:26 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by sbt78lw:
horses don't generally do any mutual-grooming prior to mating. What's the link? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_confused.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Actually, quite a few do, if given the time and space. My stallions are sometimes a pain because they seem to get really involved in the "foreplay" aspect. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

When left in the pasture with his mares, my oldest stallion quite often tries to get them to "party" with him by starting up a grooming session.

Founder of the Olde Farte Clique
If it ain't tack shopping, it's a waste of time and money.

Peggy
Jun. 11, 2003, 07:29 PM
I know of a stallion who does it by running his lips up and down the, um, organ in question (trying to keep board vaguely PG rated). We can tell when he's engaged in this pursuit as he makes a high pitched squealing noise

shelly
Jun. 11, 2003, 07:38 PM
My young gelding thinks this is a very appropriate behavior every morning after he's had his bucket and before his hay.

I know of a Peruvian Paso breeder that would have to slip a ring on her stud's penis so that he couldn't ejaculate. Apparently when it's a breeding horse they don't want him to waste anything ???

maudeflanders
Jun. 11, 2003, 07:42 PM
At least they don't hog up the bathroom to do it...

I have to say, good for them. I'm glad they get their rocks off, although it does look a little strange...

Just My Style
Jun. 11, 2003, 08:25 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Has anyone else met a sex crazed horse that feels the need to choke his chickens on occasion? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well, aren't you the queen of the politically correct statement?!?! That is just about the funniest thing I have ever read. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

If Walmart is lowering prices every day,
how come nothing is free yet?

Help control the pet population- Spay and Neuter your pets!

flponygirl
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:56 AM
I also have one of those chicken chokers. TB gelding who folks swear "has a testicle up there somewhere." He is so stallion-like that he literally killed a life sized horse statue 2 nights ago. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

"Dogs have owners, cats have staff."

RolexH
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:56 AM
HAHAHA Still laughing from this thread.

Yes, there was this gelding at my barn when I was a kid. I was really young, and when told what he was doing I nearly fell out! The used to tie a brush to his belly so he would stop. (it would smack that and ouch!) Because he did it at horse shows an ejacualted!!!

Imagine the ad for sale on that one?

16.2 Chestnut TB. Good jumper, great mover, 1 vice: spooges in the line up.

YUCK!!!!

~~Lisa~~
Aiden's web page.. DOING GREAT!! (http://www.hometown.aol.com/rolexh/Aidenshope.html)

Don't take your organs to Heaven; Heaven knows we need them here.

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:06 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by maudeflanders:
At least they don't hog up the bathroom to do it...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sorry, this had me ROTFLMAO, especially since I have two step-sons that lived with us since the age of 6 and 7.

Believe me... she speaks the truth.

The adventure has begun...
KT

CTNO
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:16 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> choke his chickens <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_cool.gif

buryinghill1
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:27 AM
I watched the breeding boss at Claiborne throw a MAJOR fit about a young stallion (actually only 3 , so a colt!) who kept having WAY too much fun.. The guy laughed, but he said "do you know how much MONEY is drooling down that leg?!"
Sorry. That one I'll never forget http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Kinsella
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:29 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by RolexH:
Imagine the ad for sale on that one?

16.2 Chestnut TB. Good jumper, great mover, 1 vice: spooges in the line up.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

OMG - I just about choked... Lisa - that is absolutely hysterical!!

Our stallions must be good boys - we rarely see them doing any choking http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

******************************
...such are the horses on which gods and heros ride.

Stoneybrooke Farm (http://www.stoneybrookefarm.com)

Catalina
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:31 AM
I worked at the Breed's Barn at the KHP one summer. Between showings, we would often take a few horses down to the main gate so the incoming visitors could interact with them. One fine summer day, I took Tre Awain Ginger Blue, a Connemara stallion, to do the nicey with the park guests. I was standing there chatting and answering questions when I heard a little girl ask her mom very loudly what Ginger was doing as she pointed under his belly. The horrified mother gasped and yanked her kid away.

Half the tourisits were staring at Ginger's belly by this point. I decided to see what was going on and glanced down under to see him going to town. I quickly started him walking in circles as I hissed at him to put that thing away. This only made matters worse, as it was now swinging from side to side as well as up and down http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif. Did I mention that he was, ahem, rather well endowed for a pony?

Suddenly, the other girls that had brought geldings down realized that their horeses had decided to join in on the fun. So here we have a pack of horses having a grand old time in front of dozens of families. We quickly quit the scene, but I saw lots of cameras in use. Those should be some interesting pictures.

*formerly cfc*

Lisamarie8
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:43 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Peggy:
I know of a stallion who does it by running his lips up and down the, um, organ in question (trying to keep board vaguely PG rated). We can tell when he's engaged in this pursuit as he makes a high pitched squealing noise<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

What, was this horse related to Ron Jeremy???? How in the world did he manage that?

--- My most endearing quality lies in my willingness to humiliate myself

Painted Joe
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:48 AM
I own an stallion ( 4 yrs. old) and a gelding(9yrs. old) and get this the gelding does it more than the stallion. Go figure. Only think I can think of why the gelding does it is he was gelded late (at 3) and is older.

" I must not forget to thank the difficult horses, who made my life miserable, but who were better teachers than the well-behaved school horses who raised no problems." Alois Podhaisky, director of the Spanish Riding School 1939

Ghazzu
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:49 AM
My recently departed stallion would often be amusing himself when I went out to feed in the morning.

Unashamed member of the Arab clique...just settin' on the Group W bench.

slc2
Jun. 12, 2003, 07:39 AM
alot of that is involuntary movements and there's some sort of formal name for it. it's normal for all male horses to move it around quite often during the day.

my horse was so studdy when i got him that even the sight of a tack trunk would set him off. ''no boy, no, not an inanimate object...''

''the boys at the barn'' were in a gelding turnout group. it would all start by rubbing their heads on the rump of a new horse, and then it would all start to look like a....i can't even say it here.

my barn manager seemed to think it was a marvelous idea to cut down the number of turnouts by putting my guy out with a mare. so i got to see the ''full range of natural behaviors'', and was always having to try and keep him from getting up on her when i was bringing them both in.

carol grant i think it was said, ''oh go on! it's good for his piaffe muscles! let him!''

so i turned a blind eye to it for some time.

sparky did seem to have some pretty good stomach muscles, but he'd be so tired when i went to ride him that i'd practically get a heart attack trying to make him go.

i thought it would be odd to tell the EMT's that i got a heart attack because my horse was out in a field having se* all day.

would they understand?

not only that, but the mare owner actually TOOK THE HORSE OUT OF THE BARN, because ''i just can't UNDERSTAND why she's so in season all the time!''

Zephyr'sMom
Jun. 12, 2003, 07:53 AM
I must be the only one in the world whose gelding does not do this. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_confused.gif But I can't say I'm sorry! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

We've got a group of about 8 geldings and mares who go out together. The barefoot group. Other than the occasional scrape on a gelding from having fought over one of the girls, there's no hanky-panky or mischief. Certainly no strangled chickens! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

-Zephyr's Mom

http://www.ZEGifts.com
http://community.webshots.com/user/sharon_kenney1359

caffeinated
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:02 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Zephyr'sMom:
I must be the only one in the world whose gelding does not do this. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_confused.gif But I can't say I'm sorry! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Nah, he's just too polite to do it around you! LOL

My yearling was starting to get into it before I got him gelded. It's really hard to have a straight faced conversation with someone when you hear that "thump, thump" from under your horse's belly... the funniest thing though is the look they have on their faces... When Yoda "discovered" "it" he looked like he'd just won the triple crown. He was SO proud of himself!

hee

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

drifting cloud
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:23 AM
My gelding does the stomach-thumping thing fairly often, but I have never seen it spout off. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Shiaway -- your story was hilarious!!

"The power of acute observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

arcadia
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:31 AM
I have tears rolling down my face.
I particularly lost it with the comment "at least they don't hog the bathroom doing it" http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

My girlfriends stallion does it everytime someone pays any attention to him. Her step-daughter went to do up his girth and was too busy blabbing away and um, er, grabbed the wrong thing.......I have never seen a 15 year old girl sooooo grossed out. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I would rather laugh with the sinners, than cry with the saints - The Piano Man

HFSH
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:41 AM
Yep, my recently departed stallion used to spank his monkey several times a day if he was bored. I was washing the offending member one day (he was SO dirty it was just disgusting) and he thought it was spank-me time and he sort of got involved in the washing thing, so I had to quit. The barn help was majorly amused by that. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

In Memory of Remarkable (http://www.hopefulfarm.com/Indy.html)

TBJumper514
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:42 AM
Haha....my geldings do the stomach thumping thing all the time...especially while flirting with the mares in season.
Oh, and how about this for a mare...I actually saw her in the act one day...my friend owned a little pony mare, and when the mare felt frisky while she was tied up she would back up the the water spigot and umm, pleasure herself. If she was in her little run outside her stall she would find a piece of wood or something along the fence to do it on...ughh!

Brandi

Black Market Radio
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:46 AM
My lod Hanoverian used to LOVE weenie washing time, needless to say I hated it! I would turn him out in the arena to do it, never had to tie him up as he looked forward to it! And I had to clean it once a month because it would get SO gross... I think he got it that dirty on purpose!

One day my friends brother was out there when I had to clean it, and he asked if he could be next http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

Chanda
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:06 AM
You know, I am really relieved to know that I am not the only one who has a gelding that ejaculates. I have been worried about this for a while thinking it was completely abnormal so I feel much better now.

The one thing that gets my boy excited every time is being touched on his chest or between his front legs. I always thought it might be because that is where the mare would be during a breeding.

www.clospepe.com (http://www.clospepe.com)

libgrrl
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:16 AM
I have a mare that enjoys having her udder cleaned far too much...

jackson
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:18 AM
I do not remember the exact horse (it may have been a few) whose thingy would whack me in the back of my hand while I was grooming the belly. I thought it was a twitch. But now I know it WASN'T. That is so wrong!

There was a horse at my barn that got a little senial as he got old and we think he was losing site and turning into a stallion at the same time cause all the horses at the barn seemed to be his bitches and he tried to do one of them in the shoulder. Chico - the black blind stallion/gelding. That was a hoot!

"Anger is the only thing that won't go away by losing it." - Jack Nicholson

---They all laughed at me when I said warmbloods would make good hunters. But I knew! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif---

lilblackhorse
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:35 AM
there was a lady at our old barn who was leasing an older gelding. He seemed to spend a lot of time in the excited mode.

She was concerned, and called the vet. Now, the vet is a friend of mine, and I happened to be there the day he showed up. This lady leads out said horse, and shows him that he seems to get pretty happy when she is around. I thought the vet was going to pee his pants laughing.

He just sortof got this slow grin on his face and said "I think he just likes you" http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif. After a thorough exam, it was determined that indeed nothing was wrong, this horse just really really liked her. Thwack thwack. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Elippses Users Clique........Co-Founder Occularly Challenged Equine Support Group, Pony Club (Graduate) Clique


"And how's that working for ya?" Dr. Phil

slc2
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:38 AM
that's pretty pitiful.

they just do it when things are going on around them. it has nothing to do with ''liking her''. it's just behavior and just normal.

Cinnamon Girl
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:45 AM
Several people have told me that my horse is proud cut also. He will drop when I brush his tummy and he's mounted a few mares on occasion also.

eclipse
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:49 AM
http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I am laughing so hard, and my co-workers are beginning to think I am totally strange!! How can I explain to them,what I am laughing at. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

My mare would fit right in with all your sexed crazed geldings. She's a total fluzy. Always squealing too new horses to advertise the fact that there's a fertile mare on the property. And, loves turning her butt to her fav gelding, & ummm spreading 'em. I should of named her "Flirty Girty". Can you just imagine the looks as I enter into the show ring, with my pretty little mare "And the next entry in the ring is __ riding Flirty Girty" and then having her start to squeal???? http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

"When the mare's good, she's very very good, but when she's bad.........look out!!!"

lilblackhorse
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:54 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by slc:
that's pretty pitiful.

they just do it when things are going on around them. it has nothing to do with ''liking her''. it's just behavior and just normal.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>



it was a joke slc.

Elippses Users Clique........Co-Founder Occularly Challenged Equine Support Group, Pony Club (Graduate) Clique


"And how's that working for ya?" Dr. Phil

caffeinated
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:24 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by eclipse:
My mare would fit right in with all your sexed crazed geldings. She's a total fluzy. Always squealing too new horses to advertise the fact that there's a fertile mare on the property. And, loves turning her butt to her fav gelding, & ummm spreading 'em. I should of named her "Flirty Girty". Can you just imagine the looks as I enter into the show ring, with my pretty little mare "And the next entry in the ring is __ riding Flirty Girty" and then having her start to squeal????<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

heh, I've told this story before but the lovely TB mare I had when I was in high school was a total slut. I was riding her around the indoor once when a kid came in for a lesson on an ancient saddlebred-arab-qh cross gelding on his last leg (well not really, he was a good guy, just not pretty). Victoria just about lost her mind. She wanted him BADDDDD..

Promptly spread her legs, peed everywhere, and just started whinnying her head off. She was desperate for some action- no amount opf smacking, kicking, and clucking could budge her. She sat there a good five minutes with her legs spread, squealing her fool head off in front of this innocent little child. The gelding looked panic stricken.... finally I gave up, got off, and called it a day...

It was more mortifying than the gelding I had before that who thumped when I curried his butt.

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

msj
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:35 AM
OMG I'm really FOMCLMAO at this thread.

It's reminding me of my draft cross gelding that was always letting it 'air' out. The first time I went to clean his sheath, I thought he was going go thru the roof that I was touching it. Then, all of a sudden, I didn't have to do much except 'hold it' and he did the rest! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

msj


You know you're a horse person when...you can find your boots by smell.

PWBTB@WC (People who browse the BB at Work Clique)

Black Market Radio
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:47 AM
msj, did we have the same horse? My Nikki did the same thing, it's REALLY embarassing isn't it? http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I just remembered I had a TB Gelding that would do his deed while I was vacuuming him!

SLC, I am not so sure, my friends horse gets all Austin Powers only when she is around, and doesn't do it when other people handle him and do the EXACT same things she does with him...

GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

Velvet
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:47 AM
msj,

But that's not how they "do it." You'd have to either be making movements on your own, or have a strong enough arm to hold a horse's entire body as he mounted your arm.

Not sure what your horse was doing, but it wasn't getting his jollies off. That would be physically impossible.

It's all about ME, ME, ME!!! (The only signature worthy of a real DQ.)

phone sneakers
Jun. 12, 2003, 11:22 AM
Horses only masturbate if their owners play with them first. I've heard some people even use things like toys or fruit to get their horse excited.

msj
Jun. 12, 2003, 11:22 AM
Hee hee hee, Velvet, just take a trip to BOCES school in Scottsville, NY and ask to clean the sheath of a big palamino gelding. I think I remember they changed his name to Bailey. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif You can determine if he's getting his jollies or not! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

msj


You know you're a horse person when...you can find your boots by smell.

PWBTB@WC (People who browse the BB at Work Clique)

Black Market Radio
Jun. 12, 2003, 11:41 AM
My old Arab stallion would Masterbate all on his own, out in his stall with no one around... I could see him from the kitchen window (our barn was pretty close to the house) and I could see "thump thump thump thump...spooooooooooooooooooge" and there would be no one there to stimulate his "thingy" but him! He was also the only horse in the barn!

GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

near miss
Jun. 12, 2003, 12:12 PM
My gelding drops and gets "excited" any time I groom him. He is an event horse so before xcountry I would always say "better put that thing away before it hits a jump!" http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
He went to be school horse a few months ago at a friends and found an old mare that he "had relations" with! He had been out with several different mares at many barns and I never saw him do this. My mare he has been with for 10 years won't let him near her. He had to come home from my friends b/c he was acting dangerous when brought out of the paddock to ride if the mare was in heat! He came home with pec's and a "jump butt" like I had never seen http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif I have come down to the barn and noticed that he has "belled" like he had just ejaculated, so I guess my boy belongs to this club too!

www.equinewellnessmassage.com (http://www.equinewellnessmassage.com)

DJ
Jun. 12, 2003, 03:04 PM
Okay, to me this is over the top. I have a 5 year old Hanno mare and a 13year gelding TB. Last heat cycle they figured the facts of life out and I witnessed at least 8 copulations one evening. When I took her to the vet to flush her uterus with antibiotics, he proposed that it was possible that the gelding was a cryptorchid and that it was unlikely, but possible that she would become pregnant. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
I was astounded, and am counting days until the next heat cycle!

jackson
Jun. 12, 2003, 03:13 PM
OMG djhoward!!!!!!!!!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif If she became pregnant that would defy all laws of breeding and the purpose of gelding.

"Anger is the only thing that won't go away by losing it." - Jack Nicholson in Anger Management

---They all laughed at me when I said warmbloods would make good hunters. But I knew! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif---

Willem
Jun. 12, 2003, 03:34 PM
I don't nott to unnerstand wot it be der problemo mit this.

------------------------
I haff sayed this be fore, I be ein German horse und this it be straight from mein mouth.

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:15 PM
Yes they do, is the answer. Can we get any sillier here? Often it has nothing to do w/ sexual excitement but just contentment (napping in sunshine, doing up their legs, grooming, boredom...). Masturbating & dropping when excited are two different things.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Melzy
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:17 PM
OMG ladies and shall I say gentlemen, thank you for making my stomach hurt with laughter! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Peggy
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:24 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by lisamarie8:
What, was this horse related to Ron Jeremy???? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
No, he actually manages to reach around, much like one of those horses who can scratch the inside of the upper part of their hind leg with their nose. We keep joking that he should have his own web site.

Konstantin92
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:33 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> it was possible that the gelding was a cryptorchid <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I actually had a question about this. Can you visibly tell the difference between a horse which is a cryptorchid versus having been gelded? How (besides maybe testosterone levels) can you tell the difference? Marks from stitches? Any other ways?

Spot
Jun. 12, 2003, 04:33 PM
you know, my boys provided SexEd 101 for my daughter several years ago.

She came home one day in tears, and I asked what was wrong (she would have been around 9 or 10 years old at the time) and she said a boy on the bus asked her if she had started masturbating yet, and asked me what masturbating meant (and at that point, I could have bloody well have killed the stupid boy for putting me in the position of having to explain this to my daughter!)

I'm thinking "SH&!" and then I remembered.

I said - "Do you remember what Spotty and Yukon do when they're standing outside in the sun, snoozing, and their Phwuwu comes down and they start lifting it up and down against their stomachs?" and she looks at me and says "Yes", and I said - "well boys and male animals do that and that is what masturbating is - it gives them pleasure" and she took one look at me and burst out laughing so thank God for the boys at that moment - they saved me from having to use human analogies to describe what it was!

But yes - I believe the figure for stallions is much higher than 6 times a day - Sato doesnt seem to do it a whole lot more than 6 or so times each day, but Spotty and Yukon were definately WAY up there!

"Spot"

RolexH
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:42 PM
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif


Spot:
Phwuwu


http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif I am dying from that!! HAHAHAHA

~~Lisa~~
Aiden's web page.. DOING GREAT!! (http://www.hometown.aol.com/rolexh/Aidenshope.html)

Don't take your organs to Heaven; Heaven knows we need them here.

OneonOne
Jun. 12, 2003, 05:58 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Willem:
I don't nott to unnerstand wot it be der problemo mit this.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh Mein Gott in Himmel!!! HAHAHA!!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I haven't laughed that hard in long time!

MyShadeOfPink
Jun. 12, 2003, 06:21 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by HFSH:
used to spank his monkey several times a day if he was bored. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh geez http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I've only see this once.. with a stallion.. at a huge show... and i was holding him and.. eek

::Jennie::
"Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everybody I've ever known."-Invisible Monsters

Lord Helpus
Jun. 12, 2003, 06:40 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Spot:
and their Phwuwu comes down !
"Spot"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I am having real trouble figuring out how to pronounce "Phwuwu"..... Is it f'WU-wu ?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I CAN spell, I just can't type and I am too blind to proofread InfoPop's teeny tiny font. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Spot
Jun. 12, 2003, 06:52 PM
Its done with a whistling sound Lord Helpus (!) with the first note higher than the second http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

You need everything possible in your repertoire when you have kids, you know!

"Spot"

Nikita
Jun. 12, 2003, 06:59 PM
Phwuwu? What the...... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
Girls are so much easier. We have whoo-ha's. Easier to spell and easier to pronounce. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

I've got to go... this technical talk is making my head spin. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

My mind not only wanders, it sometime leaves completely.

Black Market Radio
Jun. 12, 2003, 07:50 PM
When this thread dies down it HAS to go into the classic thread forum, this is SO funny!

GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

onelanerode
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:05 PM
Wow. I'm speechless. And thanking the good Lord that I've never had the, uhhh, privilege, of witnessing this. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
Whoda thunk it ... LOL. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Be careful to whom you lend your shirt if you have a tendency to wear your heart upon your sleeve.

Cruising
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:05 PM
Oh. My. Gosh.

I will never be able to look at my gelding in the same way again...!

I've never seen a horse do this! I may just be naive though...lol. The only thing (that I've seen! Now who knows what goes on when I've left...) I've seen Cruz do is, ehm, when he lets it all hang loose when I leave him in the crossties too long...he knows that doing that will convince me to put him up quickly! lol.

Belen
formerly Graciousness*
Dream as if you'll live forever
Live as if you'll die today.
http://community.webshots.com/user/lovingit09

PeriwinkleBlue
Jun. 12, 2003, 08:39 PM
There was a pony gelding and mare at the barn I used to work at that used to get their jollies together.
He was most definitely gelded, but he would go the full distance quite happily, to the point of anointing the ground under the mare's hooves. (She had a huge butt, so he couldn't get all the way up there.)
I was freaked out when it first happened, but the barn owner informed me that he'd been doing this for years.
Glad none of my geldings ever did it, I would have been scarred for life! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

*****************

He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

fivebyfive
Jun. 12, 2003, 09:23 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Cruising:
All I've seen Cruz do is, ehm, when he lets it all hang loose when I leave him in the crossties too long...he knows that doing that will convince me to put him up quickly! lol.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

The guy I partboard does that too. lol Little bugger knows how to make me hurry up. Thankfully I have yet to see a horse "spank the monkey" and hopefully, God willing, it will stay that way.

MULDER: I was told once that the best way to regenerate body heat was to crawl naked into a sleeping bag with somebody else who's already naked.

SCULLY: Well, maybe if it rains sleeping bags, you'll get lucky.

SBT
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:16 PM
Just to keep this thread "educational," I believe cryptorchid is when one of the testicles does not descend. My only basis for this knowledge is that I used to work for a small animal vet, and we charged more to neuter a cryptorchid. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif As far as I know, the only way to tell is to get in there surgically and determine the (ahem) "goods" are not down where they belong. Hence a more complicated (and expensive) procedure to retrieve them.

But I'm not sure...hopefully someone can correct me if I'm wrong! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

This whole thread has me ROTFLOL! It's hysterical that we're all so bashful about horse "appendages," whereas the horses themselves could care less...and probably think WE are very strange creatures for making them "put it away!" http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I must add my dearly-departed mare to the "hussy" list. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif She had been a broodmare for nearly 10 years, & was a TB having race-bred babies...so live cover only. She was, well...a PRO. All a stallion had to do was LOOK at her, and she'd be spread out & peeing. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif Geldings, on the other hand, didn't usually "do it for her." She was an educated woman who knew the real deal! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Adelita
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:18 PM
OMG!!!!

Hey, notice how it's almost all male horses who do this? hm..... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

&gt;^.,.^&lt;
~~Linda

*~Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.*~

Tha Ridge
Jun. 12, 2003, 10:31 PM
I remember when I was about 10 showing a large pony who much to my horror dropped out right before we went in the ring for the jog. I smacked his stomach with my crop several times and I remember it flopping while we jogged. Then right as I proceeded to get my ribbon, he, for lack of a better word, splooged. No lie...not one of my favorite stories but he was a cute pony!

- L.

Je suis un salamander. J'entrerai dans le feu mais je ne brûlerai pas.

caffeinated
Jun. 13, 2003, 06:07 AM
The QH mare I was riding last year used to get this really hopeful look on her face and get excited when I brushed her tail... LOL

How would a mare go about masturbating anyway? I mean, what is there to rub on? Fenceposts can't feel good.... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gifuzzled:

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

Spot
Jun. 13, 2003, 07:33 AM
Oh Goldentoes - you havent been around much, have you?!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>How would a mare go about masturbating anyway? I mean, what is there to rub on? Fenceposts can't feel good.... uzzled <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Well - my one mare is as close to a nymphomaniac as I think I have ever come across.

Going in vaginally to do a saline flush, or take a culture on her, she will start pumping and humping your hand when it is in there. Very nice http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

I will never forget year before last, we bred her for 22-23 days in a row. Each day we took her by Spot, and each day she'd spread her legs and pee up a storm. As he approached to mount her she'd be peeing and gyrating her hips towards him to be bred.
On Day 23, I thought - this is ridiculous - get the vet to ultrasound her to let me know what the heck is going on in there. He come out of there with a very puzzled look and said - "When was the last time you covered her"
"About 3 hours ago", I said.

"And she stood for him?"

"Oh yes" I said "Did her usual thing of peeing like crazy and shoved her bum right at him when he got close to her".

"Thats funny" he said - "she doesnt even have a follicle IN there, let alone one that she is ready to be bred on!"

I have never had a mare like her before and never one since. If there is such a thing as a nymphomaniac mare - she's certainly it!

So yes - mares DO masturbate too!

"Spot"

LimeKiwi
Jun. 13, 2003, 08:15 AM
LOL Belen my gelding does the same thing http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif And after a grooming i might add to.... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

*Tiffany*

*livejournal* (http://www.livejournal.com/users/equinekisses/)

*My webshots* (http://community.webshots.com/user/usaponyjumper)

sk_pacer
Jun. 13, 2003, 08:45 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by goldentoes:

How would a mare go about masturbating anyway? I mean, what is there to rub on? Fenceposts can't feel good.... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gifuzzled:
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I used to race a mare that would spend hours bumping and grinding against the stall wall. She was a horrid thing to work with, perpetually in heat, but she actually had cystic ovaries, and this was in the days before assorted injections, etc to alleviate the problems.

Also, way back when, every stable had a brush for for horses and geldings that did the belly beat. The brush was a fairly stiff long bristled scrub brush attached to a strap that passed around the offender's flank, and buckled with the brush right where the offender would whack his hootis against it.

Since I do not belong to a clique, I am now the founder of the Dyslexic Clique. Dyslexics of the world - UNTIE!!

HFSH
Jun. 13, 2003, 08:48 AM
Gee my mares find that their feeders and their water buckets work really well. Sometimes the wall too if you can get the right angle.

Last night in fact my mare that is heat was going to town on the wall. She had quite the pleased look on her face.

She gets bred today, so that should satisfy her for another year. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

In Memory of Remarkable (http://www.hopefulfarm.com/Indy.html)

jackson
Jun. 13, 2003, 10:24 AM
Hey spot what is a Follicle?

"Anger is the only thing that won't go away by losing it." - Jack Nicholson in Anger Management

---They all laughed at me when I said warmbloods would make good hunters. But I knew! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif---

caffeinated
Jun. 13, 2003, 10:30 AM
You'd think these mares would get splinters in their rears and never do it again... LOL

Poor things... I know I did feel bad for my mare when she pulled the squatandpee in the middle of that lesson. she was pretty upset and desperate.... LOL

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 13, 2003, 10:45 AM
Goldentoes ...

do I *dare* think it, much less say it... (like us all)

&lt;KT BLUSHES CRIMSON&gt;

The adventure has begun...
KT

monstrpony
Jun. 13, 2003, 10:48 AM
And then there's my donkey girls, who get off on the wheelbarrow handles.... (when they aren't scratching their ears on same http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif )

___________
He's not really a pony, and I'm really not "pony aged" either.

Schatten
Jun. 13, 2003, 10:48 AM
http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

http://community.webshots.com/user/lskel84

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 13, 2003, 11:19 AM
monstr --


******GROSS*****

The adventure has begun...
KT

monstrpony
Jun. 13, 2003, 11:39 AM
KT--

Which? The ear wax, or the other??

Loff my donkey girls! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

___________
He's not really a pony, and I'm really not "pony aged" either.

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 13, 2003, 12:15 PM
monstr --


Ewwwwwwwww. Even grosser.

The adventure has begun...
KT

caffeinated
Jun. 13, 2003, 12:30 PM
I wonder if there's a market for mare pacifiers....

Someone pull me out of the gutter before I drown. Please.

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

OneonOne
Jun. 13, 2003, 12:33 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by goldentoes:
I wonder if there's a market for mare pacifiers....

Someone pull me out of the gutter before I drown. Please.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
HAHAHA!

Sorry can't help ya. I'm in the gutter with you. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_cool.gif

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:14 PM
HFSH: Clean under her tail and between her teets. She has an itch. THAT'S why mares rub. Sorry, but to all who posted your horney-horsey stories you should know this, especially if you're reproducing them. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/sigh.gif A willing mare spreds her legs, lifts her tail (like when she pees), often "squirts/winks", and even keeps looking around towards rear waiting for her guy.
A mare who is ready to be bred (has been palpated) but is not receptive, or possibly not even showing signs of heat, will often react quite NEGATIVLY.
PS: cruddy teets will also make a mare rub off her tail, it's not strictly a parasite thing....

"Loose horse on the main track"

caffeinated
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:22 PM
Well you're no fun.

Even if it is delusion, I'm quite enjoying this exercise in horsey horniness. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Additionally, on a more serious note, one of the mares I mentioned earlier was definitely kept QUITE clean yet still responded quite obviously to any activity around her butt with a gleeful lifting of tail and a hopeful look. Didn't look like an "itchy" response to me, and wasn't just when she was in heat...

I don't think it's that off the wall to think that horses (or any other animal) might actually enjoy sex or sexual contact for reasons other than reproduction. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

Spot
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:33 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>A willing mare spreds her legs, lifts her tail (like when she pees), often "squirts/winks", and even keeps looking around towards rear waiting for her guy.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Okay Loose Horse no halter - what do you call a mare that humps your arm when you go in there vaginally? I'd call it horny - ain't never seen no mare with no itch in those thar parts before ! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

"Spot"

Zigfrito
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:39 PM
I know a girl that thought her gelding was swishing flies off of his belly when he was smacking his belly with his umm... Needless to say, she was rather embarrassed when I told her what he was really doing!

Real Horses Weigh a Ton

Coreene
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:40 PM
Willem beats that drum over and over and over.

lilblackhorse
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:44 PM
typical male..... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Elippses Users Clique........Co-Founder Occularly Challenged Equine Support Group, Pony Club (Graduate) Clique


"And how's that working for ya?" Dr. Phil

monstrpony
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:58 PM
Loose Horse--

You callin' my donkey girls unclean?? Actually, they're remarkably clean little critters, wish my horses would follow their habits. And, yes, I've checked between their teats, that is *not* why they are fascinated with the wheelbarrow, etc. Besides, if it were parasites or crud in their privates, how do you explain the submissive signs in their facial expressions???? Huh???

(are we really still having this discussion??)

___________
He's not really a pony, and I'm really not "pony aged" either.

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 13, 2003, 01:59 PM
SPOT: the above posts were referring to feed tubs, wheelbarrow handles, walls & such. Never seen those inserted vaginally (now if we were talking humans you could take that bit and run w/ it).
Goldentoes: As for enjoying their tails rubbed even if clean, well duh. Add necks, withers, ears, chins, eyes... all rather non-eroneous (sp?) areas to a horse but will curl a lip none the less even when clean.
I never said horses don't like sex, but they are not like humans...sex for fun & not just reproduction would open mares up to all sorts of infection and lower the grade of uterine tone (no more babies). They already are a tough species to reproduce % naturally. Show me a horney mare who is not in heat and I'll bet she has an infection, cyst, hormonal imbalance (natural or induced), etc...throwing her out of wack already.
Colts masturbate out of necessity. Anything relaxing can set them off. Half asleep & yawning even.
But glad you all are having fun with it anyway. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif Do stay away from the sheep (I'm only KIDDING!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif)

"Loose horse on the main track"

Spot
Jun. 13, 2003, 02:06 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> SPOT: the above posts were referring to feed tubs, wheelbarrow handles, walls & such. Never seen those inserted vaginally (now if we were talking humans you could take that bit and run w/ it).
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh dear, Loose Horse No Halter - I wont touch this comment with the proverbial 10 foot barge pole! Heck - not even if was a 20' long pole! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

How in God's name did this discussion degrade itself to such horrifically low depths, where LHNH even has to warn us away from the sheep!?

"Spot"

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 13, 2003, 05:52 PM
See Spot.... Anyone who falsely claims (or maybe just doesn't recognise what his/her mare is actually doing, hmmm let's see, squatting to avoid DISCOMFORT) to have a mare "hump" his arm has already brought things to "horrifically low depths". Sheep are the least of the problem. Donkeys may have other habits altogether, I'm only seriously addressing horses here.
Someone asked a normal question and I gave fairly informed answers. You all go on w/ your facination...it's really only remotely humorous the first time around. This thread has lost it's reason to be, so I'm outta here.
PS., The vaginal canal is tissue thin, you shouldn't be poking around in there.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Black Market Radio
Jun. 13, 2003, 08:25 PM
SAVE THE BABY CARROTS!!!!!

GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

JackieBlue
Jun. 13, 2003, 08:52 PM
We used to have a stallion who we affectionately knick-named "Spanky". They all do it, some more than others.

daytimedrama
Jun. 13, 2003, 09:41 PM
George always has his "kickstand" or "fifth leg" out. If I hand walk him or scratch his nose he gets excited. If I get on to ride him, he has it out. Sometimes he has it our while we trot around in our lessons. We try explaining that this is a family operation but his behavior doesn't change. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

~Christina~
"I made a new friend today."
"Real or imaginary?"
"Imaginary."

Kestrel
Jun. 14, 2003, 01:49 AM
There is a gelding at our barn who will lay down with his legs under him, then push part way up with his front end. Then much rocking and groaning takes place. I haven't been motivated to check for spooging. This guy will also pull out his sword while waiting at the back gate.

Schatten
Jun. 14, 2003, 04:36 AM
may not be the case with your horse, but lots of horses do that to scratch their stomachs. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

http://community.webshots.com/user/lskel84

Daydream Believer
Jun. 14, 2003, 06:24 AM
This is the first time I've read this thread. What a scream! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I have a nymphomaniac mare that loves to be rectally palpated. She gets a glazed over expression on her face that is truly bizzare. What you have to know is this mare is terrible for any other vet procedure so it's obvious that she' likes it...a lot... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

I have a gelding who was caught "de flagrante" with a mare a few years ago consummating their passion. He's not a proud cut either and has never tried to do it again with another mare. I think some boys are just more able than others and certain mares just turn them on.

Thank God neither of my two geldings are inclined to "beat their monkeys" much...at least while I'm grooming them anyway.

"No hour of life is lost that is spent in the saddle..." Winston Churchill

Spot
Jun. 14, 2003, 07:06 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> PS., The vaginal canal is tissue thin, you shouldn't be poking around in there.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

LHNH - I dont exactly go "poking around in there" for something to do on a daily or weekly basis! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

When she aborted last November, we needed to do several flushes on her to clean up the post abortion infection. No other way to do it OTHER than going in there vaginally that I can think of!

When the vet is going in to take a culture - again - havent found any way to get one of those either other than through that particular orifice.

When we had to do a post breeding flush of saline and gentocin - again - vaginally is the only way to go that I am aware of, so yes - I am very well aware of how to go in there and get the job done. It is just a little disconcerting when she insists on gyrating and pumping against my arm when I am in there!

"Spot"

HFSH
Jun. 14, 2003, 08:20 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Loose Horse - No Halter:
HFSH: Clean under her tail and between her teets. She has an itch. THAT'S why mares rub. Sorry, but to all who posted your horney-horsey stories you should know this, especially if you're reproducing them. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/sigh.gif A willing mare spreds her legs, lifts her tail (like when she pees), often "squirts/winks",<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yeah, well, I couldn't find the cruddies in her boobies. I think her kid helps rid her of those. She's a raging slut when she's in heat. Today, after ovulation, no worries, no itches, nothing. Hope she's preggo!

In Memory of Remarkable (http://www.hopefulfarm.com/Indy.html)

sketcher
Jun. 15, 2003, 12:09 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Loose Horse - No Halter:
HFSH: Clean under her tail and between her teets. She has an itch. THAT'S why mares rub. Sorry, but to all who posted your horney-horsey stories you should know this, especially if you're reproducing them. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/sigh.gif A willing mare spreds her legs, lifts her tail (like when she pees), often "squirts/winks", and even keeps looking around towards rear waiting for her guy.
A mare who is ready to be bred (has been palpated) but is not receptive, or possibly not even showing signs of heat, will often react quite NEGATIVLY.
PS: cruddy teets will also make a mare rub off her tail, it's not strictly a parasite thing....

"Loose horse on the main track"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Thankyou! I thought I was missing something. Our colt pleasures himself regularly but I have yet to see a mare doing the same http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif We did have a mare here who apparently would stand for live cover for months on end though. Eventually the people who owned her discovered that she had settled right in the beginning but was willing to be covered regardless.

Liberty
Jun. 15, 2003, 09:17 PM
Well, even though the original question has been (quite thoroughly) answered, I have to add that my gelding has sported a woody on more than one occasion. Only twice, though, has he beat his drum with any witnesses around.

Normally, he's quite modest (hates sheath cleaning and needs a goodly dose of "happy horse" before he'll grudgingly submit), but occasionally during grooming (either by me or my mare), his "kickstand" (LOL) comes down. There was the time, though, when his anticipation of a few ginger snaps when I took too long to get them out of the box resulted in quite a show. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

As for my mare, my gelding couldn't care less about her, even when she's in a raging heat. The other day when I let him out of his stall after breakfast, my in-heat girl immediately sidled over to him, and did the squat, winky thing in his face. When that got no response, she stuck her head down in his sheath area, to which my gelding just switched his tail and walked off. She was so indignant.

I keep telling her that while he may LOOK like he's got the equipment, he ain't going to use it, and I swear she's going to get her head kicked in one of these days.

The most embarrassing time, though, was when my farrier was here (a young, very good-looking guy). I had my gelding tied in the aisle, next to my mare's stall door. Farrier and I were shooting the breeze when we both looked over to see my mare and gelding "necking" (doing the mutual nipping/grooming thing along each other's crests). My gelding was obviously enjoying it FAR too much. I could feel my face turning many shades of red. My farrier just laughed and said "oh great, show it off, Big Guy". http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Oh, and I have a cat (neutered when he was a kitten) who, now after 9 years, has created a "special friend" in the form of the edge of his cat bed. The other day, one of my other cats was hacking up a hairball while Mr. HotStuff was humping his bed, and my husband walks through the house saying "Oh, this is just lovely; over here we have a cat "herking up" on the floor, and over there, another is getting his rocks off." http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Animals - you just gotta love 'em.

Kerby
Jun. 16, 2003, 11:59 AM
I work at a farm where we have lots of schoolies, and thus we have summer camp (teh dreaded summercamp of under 13 yr olds) When the teacher (age 17yrs old, just graduated from high school) said 'I'll now deminstrate on how to bath a horse', and proceeds to take them to the field to get her horse. Well her mare is out there, legs spread, tail to one side, gelding on her back... now you can image what 10 little kids said when they saw this. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

We also have a stallion and his brother 'gelding formally known as stallion' who lay in their stalls sleeping and nickering to themselves in most excitable way.. I wonder what they're dreaming of. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

And our stallion is learning the show ring is not the place to show of his manliness, but he's obviously a slow learner in this department. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif He also likes to drop it just about the time you have to put on stable bandages after a compitition, face to face with his man parts.. yikes! to close for comfort!

Anyways this post got me laughing... it is too funny!!

"You can tell a gelding, ask a mare, but you must discuss it with a stallion."

Kerby
Jun. 16, 2003, 12:00 PM
ps: baaaaa!

monstrpony
Jun. 16, 2003, 12:02 PM
I asked a friend to feed my horses for a couple of days when I was out of town during the winter. She went to blanket my gelding, reached under his belly to grab the surcingle, and grabbed something else in stead. She was extremely flattered that he found her so attractive!

___________
He's not really a pony, and I'm really not "pony aged" either.

eclipse
Jun. 16, 2003, 12:11 PM
So Kerby, would that of been my mare???? or as she shall be known from now on "Flirty Girty". http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

"When the mare's good, she's very very good, but when she's bad.........look out!!!"

Kerby
Jun. 16, 2003, 12:17 PM
LOL no Eclipse, it was Vodka.. image Jesse trying to explain what was going on to the summer camp kids.. I think she said they were playing leap frog. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

"You can tell a gelding, ask a mare, but you must discuss it with a stallion."

eclipse
Jun. 16, 2003, 12:27 PM
http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

I must mention this to Jessie next time she's around!!!

"When the mare's good, she's very very good, but when she's bad.........look out!!!"

WingedPanda
Jun. 16, 2003, 02:26 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by goldentoes:
I wonder if there's a market for mare pacifiers....
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ok, coming to this thread a little late, but..


EIIW EIIW EIIW EIIW EIIW EIIW EIIW!!!

http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/dead.gif

One of the lessons of history is that Nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say.
- Will Durant

SpringBreak
Jun. 16, 2003, 03:13 PM
i have yet to see simon masturbate, but i know he's well hung http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif whenever i scratch the top of his tailbone he spreads his legs and it drops, so when im combing through his tail i always get a present http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

im reading these posts laughing my erm...arse off..i cant imagine all this http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

*Spring Break*
*Simon*
*Homie S*

ika
Jun. 16, 2003, 03:51 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kerby:
Well her mare is out there, legs spread, tail to one side, gelding on her back... now you can image what 10 little kids said when they saw this. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
The exact same thing happened one year while I was working at my barn's camp. A mare and gelding who had been turned out together for ages decided to go at it right in front of all the kids. The gelding actually entered the mare..She was loving it! We herded all the kids inside and ran to separate them..I left it to the barn manager to try and explain what was going on. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

I also recently noticed that one of our schoolie mares really gets into rubbing herself on the wall when she is in heat..never thought much of it until I read this post and realized what she's doing!

you know I can't let you slide through my hands..wild horses couldn't drag me away..

RolexH
Jun. 16, 2003, 08:58 PM
Spot,

http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif HAHAHAHA that is all I have to say! Still Rolling! HAHAHAA

~~Lisa~~
Aiden's page.. DOING GREAT!! (http://www.hometown.aol.com/rolexh/Aidenshope.html)

Recycle yourself; Be an organ donor http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Jaguar
Jun. 16, 2003, 11:59 PM
hahaha well i never realized this happened until now........but i almost think i was happier thinking they were such innocent sweet animals!

"I hope you will grow up to be gentle and good, and never learn bad ways, do your work with good will, lift your feet up well when you trot, and never bite or kick even in play."
-Duchess, Black Beauty, Anna Sewell

Jaguar
Jun. 17, 2003, 12:10 AM
lisamarie 8......hahahaha! loff the ron jeremy comment, i was sorta thinking that myself.......

phone sneakers.......so if i give my horse an apple he might mistake it for a pick up line and start going nuts? hahaha brings a whole new light to giving your horse a treat!

Spot, your sex ed class is soo funny! except is your daughter aware that boys dont just manually flot it up and down against their stompachs? hahaha that vision makes me laugh!

The Ridge, thats sooo gross .......but funny somehow at the same time.....sounds like a "funny sport story" you could have sent in to YM or Seventeen when you were younger.....

"I hope you will grow up to be gentle and good, and never learn bad ways, do your work with good will, lift your feet up well when you trot, and never bite or kick even in play."
-Duchess, Black Beauty, Anna Sewell

Et Tu
Jun. 17, 2003, 07:28 AM
This has trully been an educational post. I knew the "boys" did it...but never the "ladies", however we have had a few drink induced tack room conversations about it when the stud starts in. Anyway....I just must say....

HAHHAHA...now I'm going to go get a towel to wipe off the coffee from my screen lol.

~Idyll Talk~
Proud member of the Indiana Clique~~There's more than corn in Indiana (I swear I swear there is!!!)
Pet your pony...she just saved your butt!

caffeinated
Jun. 17, 2003, 07:39 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Loose Horse - No Halter:
Do stay away from the sheep (I'm only KIDDING!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

HA! I didn't even see this comment until, well... now! snort!

oh dear... I think my mind is permanently corrupted by this thread...

_____________________________
~Come the Rapture, can I have your car???~

Tha Ridge
Jun. 17, 2003, 09:02 AM
I'm still young enough to send it in to seventeen or YM. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

LOL...they have those little cartoons to represent the embarassing moment. I wonder what mine would be. Haha! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

- L.

Je suis un salamander. J'entrerai dans le feu mais je ne brûlerai pas.

Roxy Redhead
Jun. 17, 2003, 10:17 AM
My mare is a major Hoe ... when she is in heat, she bumps and grinds against the stall wall ... she stands parallel to the wall, legs spread tail in the air, and body slams the wall with her hip/belly, head down and winking the entire time. Try explaining that to the 7 year old nephews !!!! ("Well, um, Feather has an ITCH...")

Katy, owned and loved by Feather, the Spotted Wonderhorse
** Member of the Appaloosa Clique **
** Get Spotted on an Appaloosa **

sketcher
Jun. 17, 2003, 10:30 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Liberty:
I have to add that my gelding has sported a woody on more than one occasion. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

We have a gelding who often gets quite excited when the mares are in heat. Unfortunatley for the poor fella, it is more like a small splinter than a woodie. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif He probably wouldn't be physically capable of breeding a mare...It's pretty pathetic looking but thankfully he has no idea we are laughing at him. You'd have to see it to believe it. Hmm, maybe I'll post a picture... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Spot
Jun. 17, 2003, 10:35 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> You'd have to see it to believe it. Hmm, maybe I'll post a picture.. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh PLEASE do Sketcher, http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

I mean - this whole thread hasnt sunk to low enough depths already - what is a picture of your horse's "splinter" going to hurt?!

"Spot"

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 12:23 PM
Spot wrote, among a bunch of other crap "Okay Loose Horse no halter - what do you call a mare that humps your arm when you go in there vaginally? I'd call it horny - ain't never seen no mare with no itch in those thar parts before !"

Poor Spot, still doesn't know he/she can infuse a lavage w/out using his/her arm in the vaginal canal. Nor should he. You manipulate a speculum, tubing, and most anything else needed for reaching the uterous, through the rectum. And I don't care what he/she says about the mare enjoying his arm-probe....not. You're just a perv and belong on another site.

"Loose horse on the main track"

starboard
Jun. 17, 2003, 12:37 PM
Um, what was that all about? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

LHNH, can you share your knowledge without being insulting?

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 17, 2003, 12:51 PM
Hear hear, windward.

The adventure has begun...
KT

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 12:56 PM
Go back and read Spot's junk, then tell your vet about Spot's little stories of entering the vaginal canal w/ Spot's arm for dosing a lavage & Spot's claim of the mare humping him, and THEN tell who's being insulting....whenever someone BSs you, they're insulting your intelligence. Judging by most of the posts I'm guessing that's not amounting to much. Spot should go South of the border to catch the show he/she's looking for. ....walking a fine line for what's legal in this country.
Being giggly is one thing but this person is not quite right.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Schatten
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:01 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Go back and read Spot's junk, then tell your vet about Spot's little stories of entering the vaginal canal w/ Spot's arm for dosing a lavage & Spot's claim of the mare humping him, and THEN tell who's being insulting....whenever someone BSs you, they're insulting your intelligence. Judging by most of the posts I'm guessing that's not amounting to much. Spot should go South of the border to catch the show he/she's looking for. ....walking a fine line for what's legal in this country.
Being giggly is one thing but this person is not quite right.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

WTF?! was that really nescessary?

http://community.webshots.com/user/lskel84

Chestnut Mare
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:03 PM
LHNH, you don't have to agree with Spot or anyone else, but you do have to avoid the personal attacks. There are better ways to disagree.

"Better dead than red?"

Lisamarie8
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:05 PM
Loose Horse no halter - I bet you're a real blast at parties http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

--- I may be love's b*tch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.

joliemom
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:21 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by lisamarie8:
Loose Horse no halter - I bet you're a real blast at parties http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Yeah, and don't even suggest a game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey.

Loose Horse no halter, maybe you should change your name to Loose Cannon fully loaded.

"Never trust a man in a blue trench coat, never drive a car when you're dead." Tom Waits

Kinsella
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:23 PM
I wasn't going to add to this hysterical thread. But I just have to say that I feel sorry for any mare that has a tube inserted for insemination or lavage or whatever without the protection of a hand to keep the end of said tube from ripping her to shreds...

And for what it's worth, we must have a bunch of polite (or shy!) stallions because I never catch them doing uh, well, you know... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

******************************
...such are the horses on which gods and heros ride.

Stoneybrooke Farm (http://www.stoneybrookefarm.com)

caffeinated
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:24 PM
I have no experience breeding, but LHNH, could you explain to me how to do a uterine lavage through the rectum?

I'm just confused about how that would work, so didn't see anything strange about Spot's post... I can ask a vet later, but figured you might be able to explain (though it'd be nice if you refrained from calling people pervs)

http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

_____________________________
"It takes a whole lot of testosterone to wear a beret and not look fruity"

Goodyfourshoes!
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:27 PM
edit

Adelita
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:32 PM
And what I wanna know is who's to say that horses AREN'T sexual creatures? LHNH, how do you know they don't enjoy it....all creatures have sexual urges, why would horses be different? Humans aren't the only ones who achieve orgasm.

&gt;^.,.^&lt;
~~Linda

*~Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.*~

Lisamarie8
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:33 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by joliemom:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by lisamarie8:
Loose Horse no halter - I bet you're a real blast at parties http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Yeah, and don't even suggest a game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey.

Loose Horse no halter, maybe you should change your name to Loose Cannon fully loaded.

"Never trust a man in a blue trench coat, never drive a car when you're dead." Tom Waits<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

PIN THE TAIL ON THE DONKEY!!!! joliemom! anyone who is not full of crap knows that you don't actually have to use the tail to pin the tail on the donkey. The preferred method is to go up through the frog, around the elbow to get to the ass. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

--- I may be love's b*tch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.

ika
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:44 PM
LOL! Okay so back to the original topic again..It's funny how this thread ties into events on the farm. My friend's 17 year old TB gelding is always shoving his butt up overtop of his water bucket, so that he is straddling it. He's been doing it since she bought him so yesterday the barn manager went to investigate what he's up to. She walked into his stall and pushed him over..his winkie was hanging out and he was either rubbing it on his bucket or dunking it in! We have all been obvlivious to that fact that he was doing *that* and if you take his bucket away or put it somewhere else he gets really agitated. Now we know why! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

you know I can't let you slide through my hands..wild horses couldn't drag me away..

Oakbridge Equestrian Centre (http://www.geocities.com/oakbridge_equestrian)

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:48 PM
....fun at parties yes, but this thread has become a "dog & pony" show (& tell). There's a lot of fodder for fun even in (ok, especially in...having worked in the repo buiz before where 300+/- mares went through in a season, grins & giggles kept us sane) this topic, but a few people are turning it into an outlet for the perverse.
Moderator: moderate....nice that some kid now thinks by scratching her female pony's tail that expressions of itchy pleasure are something else. And that you palpate/medicate from the same place.
Spot is simply being disgusting. Not very funny once you know his tale of lavaging is just not true. Who makes that kind of bunk up? There's plenty of REAL world humor.
Yeah, Spot's a regular Steve Martin.
Party on.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 01:57 PM
LHNH, how do you know they don't enjoy it....all creatures have sexual urges, why would horses be different? Humans aren't the only ones who achieve orgasm.

Adalita: Never said they didn't (obviously they do), just not as a few posts described.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:26 PM
You palpate & manipulate some equipment w/ your arm inside *the rectum*. Ever wonder why your vet pulls out a pile of manuer (hint: that's not a vaginal bi-product) before re-inserting his arm for a better feel? Spot would have to be fairly well trained to guide a pipette through the cervix using his hand & index finger. And I seriously doubt the mare would "hump".
New to this site yes. I think I've seen enough http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

"Loose horse on the main track"

[This message was edited by Loose Horse - No Halter on Jun. 17, 2003 at 06:11 PM.]

Erin
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:33 PM
You're not that new... alter alert, alter alert. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

lilblackhorse
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:33 PM
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Loose Horse - No Halter:

New to this site yes. I think I've seen enough http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

QUOTE]


Well, it's interesting to note that of 22 posts, 9 of yours have been on this thread alone.......

On any bb, you have to take things said with a grain of salt, but what were you expecting from a thread entitled "Do horses masturbate?" http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Elippses Users Clique........Co-Founder Occularly Challenged Equine Support Group, Pony Club (Graduate) Clique


"And how's that working for ya?" Dr. Phil

RolexH
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:38 PM
Oh my...

I am not sure which will offend Spot more, you calling HER a perv or calling HER a "HIM". HAHAHA

~~Lisa~~
Aiden's page.. DOING GREAT!! (http://www.hometown.aol.com/rolexh/Aidenshope.html)

Recycle yourself; Be an organ donor http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

SuperCal
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:39 PM
I think we should have a horse weeny photo contest http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif LOL! J/K.

I wasn't going to post in this topic... but just wanted to say you guys have some hilarious (and mortifying) stories http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/dead.gif

Adelita
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:43 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by lilblackhorse:
On any bb, you have to take things said with a grain of salt...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Especially on THIS bb! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

&gt;^.,.^&lt;
~~Linda

*~Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.*~

Black Market Radio
Jun. 17, 2003, 02:46 PM
Baby Quiches UNITE!!!!!!

My lil Arab colt was wagging in the wind today...

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 03:18 PM
I'm still on Training Level but naughty horses are about to alter that status! Oh what some people will do to climb the ladder!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
Please, no pics!! What will the developers at Wall Mart think!!

"Loose horse on the main track"

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 17, 2003, 03:30 PM
To quote that erudite scholar, Living it Up:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>cough *TROLL* cough <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

The adventure has begun...
KT

Spot
Jun. 17, 2003, 04:27 PM
thanks to everyone for putting LHNH in his/her place whoever he/she may be ! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif It must be another one that has crawled out from under the closest rock ...

Isnt it just hilarious (not!) how these new posters come on board and hurl insults. Obviously best to ignore them totally ...

LHNH - You caught me out - I get my jollies doing vaginal examinations on mares! I am hoping to graduate to rectal exams as soon as possible as I understand that is even more thrilling.

But what I truly get excited about is when someone calls me to inseminate their mare and I actually get to hold the semen as well as do the insemination - now THAT is truly an exciting experience.

And oh yes - I, for one - would simply LOVE to know how to clear up a uterine infection through the rectum? What an assinine comment THAT one is http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

get a life is all I can say

"Spot"

sketcher
Jun. 17, 2003, 04:31 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Spot:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> You'd have to see it to believe it. Hmm, maybe I'll post a picture.. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh _PLEASE_ do Sketcher, http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

I mean - this whole thread hasnt sunk to low enough depths already - what is a picture of your horse's "splinter" going to hurt?!

"Spot"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Aww Come on Spot!! Have a sense of humor (juvenile as it is) or don't read it!! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

And on the more serious side, I was seriously considering breeding to one of your beautiful stallions in the future.

Some of you people who are so quick to jump into the fray ought to consider that there are a lot of 'little' people on these boards taking note of how you handle things and us little people make up a large part of your business - I have to think... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Willem
Jun. 17, 2003, 04:37 PM
You haff to ASK before you stick der arm in der virginia. Everyboddie they know wot this it be der place for der spank monkey.

I want to haff foto contest. Mebbe I win!

------------------------
I haff sayed this be fore, I be ein German horse und this it be straight from mein mouth.

Spot
Jun. 17, 2003, 04:40 PM
okay okay Sketcher - post the "splinter" picture already

Remember - Ive been caught out by LHNH - I just LOVE to watch ! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

But what if I threaten to start circulating his "splinter" picture around the internet to other like minded individuals ??? Surely there must be other individuals like me out there that would LOVE love to see him in all his glory!

Would you pay hush money so that others didnt snicker at him?

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> You haff to ASK before you stick der arm in der virginia. Everyboddie they know wot this it be der place for der spank monkey.

I want to haff foto contest. Mebbe I win!

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh Willem - I am in tears ... OMG - I think that is the funniest post I have EVER read!
By careful though, or LHNH will start hurling insults at you too!


"Spot"

Black Market Radio
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:03 PM
"And oh yes - I, for one - would simply LOVE to know how to clear up a uterine infection through the rectum? What an assinine comment THAT one is"


Huh huh... she said ASSinine...

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

SuperCal
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:08 PM
I think my mind has been permanently corrupted *bursts out laughing*

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:09 PM
Yes Spot, I've crawled out from under a rock just for the enjoyment of reading your "mare humping my arm" story. Which you must have thought entertaining lest you wouldn't have made such a contribution.
Wow, you actually CAN perform a reproductive procedure and everything! I'm surprised, as you didn't sound like a person w/ a talent. In fact, I didn't even recognise you as a smarty horsey person! Imagine that, w/ me not having been on COTH long enough to have been told so.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Black Market Radio
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:11 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Loose Horse - No Halter:
I'm still on Training Level but naughty horses are about to alter that status! Oh what some people will do to climb the ladder!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
Please, no pics!! What will the developers at Wall Mart think!!

"Loose horse on the main track"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


Hey, a lot of us now have digital cameras... Walmart need not be involved... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

Spot
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:17 PM
I vote that we totally ignore LHNH's idiotic posts (or Loose Cannon No Brain or whatever it was that joliemom suggested! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif)

I dont much care what he/she comes up with - once you consider the source, it no longer matters anyhow http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Oh! And for what it is worth - I did take a repro course - thanks for asking

"Spot"

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:22 PM
devildog20: Palpate through the rectum, guide pipette through vaginal canal into cervix (barely) w/ cupped hand (pipette under forefinger).
Judging by the way Spot claimed a mare was humping her arm, she didn't sound equiped to do that...but instead just some yokel painting a perverted picture. She should know a uterine infection can cause a mare to act receptive. But a thousand mares later I've NEVER seen one "hump" an arm. Squat on one and break it, yes! Sounds to me like it's Spot who's life needs spice.

"Loose horse on the main track"

Oldenburg Mom
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:23 PM
Spot,

Here's my support for pulling that "Ignore" switch down in the voting booth.

Consider it done.

Now about Willem and his winning the contest...

The adventure has begun...
KT

FairWeather
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:29 PM
again with the insults.
apparently you've been around for a bit
*troll*

__________________________
A little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest men...
FairWeather (http://www.fairweather-farm.com)
CANTER West Virginia (http://www.canterusa.org/westvirginia)

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:35 PM
Dev.dog20: Yikes! Digital cameras...but there is some pimply faced teenage boy working at Wall Mart who thinks he's a stud muffin. Imagine what "splinter" could do to keep his ego in check http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Spotty old gal, you sound a little too thin skinned to be dishing out if you can't take it. I give, you can have your thread back. (Loosen the bone Wilma, said Fred.)

"Loose horse on the main track"

sketcher
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:39 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Spot:
okay okay Sketcher - post the "splinter" picture already...


Would you pay hush money so that others didnt snicker at him?
"Spot"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Well....since he isn't my horse http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif I don't suppose it would matter if his picture were circulated. His owner is very young and was blushing strongly the night we were making fun of him.

I don't actually 'have' the picture though.... and I'll be darned if I'm going to be the first one to post one. I didn't really expect anyone to take me up on the offer http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif Kind of a take-off on the 'post yor feet' thread??

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> You haff to ASK before you stick der arm in der virginia. Everyboddie they know wot this it be der place for der spank monkey.

I want to haff foto contest. Mebbe I win!
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


OMG, I splilled my soda when I read this one http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

Loose Horse - No Halter
Jun. 17, 2003, 05:48 PM
OK, last post, honest. Passing on a joke a vet buddy e-mailed. Now this I found truly funny.

A guy calls his buddy the horse rancher and says he's sending a Friend over to look at a horse. His buddy asks "How will I recognize
him?"
That's easy, he's a Midget with a speech impediment." So, the midget shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a Male or
female horse. "A female horth." So he shows him a prized filly. "Nith lookin
horth. Can I thee her eyeth?" So the guy picks up the midget and he gives the horse's eyes the Once over. "Nith eyeth, can I thee her
earzth"? So he picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears. "Nith earzth, can I see her mouf?" The rancher is
gettin' pretty ticked off by this point, but he picks Him up again and shows him the horse's mouth. "Nice mouf, can I see her twat"? Totally mad as fire at this point, the rancher grabs him under his Arms and rams the
midget's head as far as he can up the horse's twat, pulls him out and slams him on the ground. The midget gets up, sputtering and
coughing.
"Perhapth I should rephrase that; Can I thee her wun awound a widdlebit?"

"Loose horse on the main track"

Black Market Radio
Jun. 17, 2003, 06:03 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Loose Horse - No Halter:
devildog20: Palpate through the rectum, guide pipette through vaginal canal into cervix (barely) w/ cupped hand (pipette under forefinger).
Judging by the way Spot claimed a mare was humping her arm, she didn't sound equiped to do that...but instead just some yokel painting a perverted picture. She should know a uterine infection can cause a mare to act receptive. But a thousand mares later I've NEVER seen one "hump" an arm. Squat on one and break it, yes! Sounds to me like it's Spot who's life needs spice.

"Loose horse on the main track"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Uh, I didn't ask how to do this, I was quoting Spot and thought it was funny that she said ASSinine!!!!!

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

RolexH
Jun. 17, 2003, 06:26 PM
Willem:
FINALLY! we can get a real opinion here. Are you scratching your tummy, or "enjoying" yourself?

Sorry to get personel Willem. But we must settle this debate.

~~Lisa~~
Aiden's page.. DOING GREAT!! (http://www.hometown.aol.com/rolexh/Aidenshope.html)

Recycle yourself; Be an organ donor http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

~SC~
Jun. 17, 2003, 07:28 PM
OMG, I just read through this entire post and I am DYING!!!! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif Willem..."virginia"...I am ROFLMAO right now!!!! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

~Sarah~


~Disgruntled College Students Clique~Georgia Clique~Junior Clique (Can I please still be a member?? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif )~ Buckle Bunnies http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

arnika
Jun. 17, 2003, 07:43 PM
I'm afraid (or is it glad? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif) that I don't have anything to say about this topic from personal experience on the farm. HOWEVER, thanks to all who did as it has had me giggling hysterically at the monitor this evening. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

My vote goes to adding this to the classic threads without a doubt!

slainte!
Jun. 17, 2003, 07:47 PM
i read this entire thread and i must say that this is absolutely classic!

LHNH - you need a new board.
Spot - i think you're my idol

and Willem - settle this debate already before pony porn makes it's debut on COTH....

dear lord! hhahahaha http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

-Liz
"The sight of that horse did something to me I've never quite been able to explain. He was more than tremendous strength and speed and beauty of motion. He set me dreaming" - Walt Morey

Nikita
Jun. 17, 2003, 08:26 PM
Ah geez... here we go again http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif Spot outs one name and the very same day, another one is registered and low and behold it's out to get Spot! Uh huh.

Anybody else getting the same idea I am? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif pintofoal..... piggy..... I'll help pay for the shipping!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>You haff to ASK before you stick der arm in der virginia. Everyboddie they know wot this it be der place for der spank monkey.

I want to haff foto contest. Mebbe I win!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

ROTFLMAO!!!!!! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Willem I think I loff you. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

My mind not only wanders, it sometime leaves completely.

heelsdown
Jun. 17, 2003, 08:52 PM
My stomach is sore from laughter. This thread must be saved now because I have a feeling that it will be, ahem, altered soon.

All points
Jun. 18, 2003, 09:10 AM
This thread is soooo funny!! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

The only I can share is a good one. My very proper grandmother has a gelding, that she knows is has one up there. When I was in sixth grade, (and I will never forget this) I got dropped off the bus at the end of our farm lane. Our front pasture is right along the lane. The bus pulls up one spring afternoon to drop me off, and I am only the second stop, so the bus is full of my classmates. There in the front pasture is Grandmom's gelding going at it with my mare, in front of the whole bus http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif First everyone was quiet, then the yelling out the bus windows started. I had to play sick for a week, because of that horse. AS I finally walked up the lane, I see my mortifed Grandmother peering out from the barn, she had been trying to catch him for 20 mins, before the bus arrived, but he was otherwise engaged. I thanked her for the show he put on, and the humlitation I would endure. But I think she was more stunned and humilated than me. Of course, we were never to discuss this again. Its now referred to as the incident.

That gelding is now 31, still lives with me, and every spring he is on some mare or gelding http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif. He will never be to old to give it a go.

Spot
Jun. 18, 2003, 09:33 AM
All Points - THAT is downright hilarious! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
At that age, you may as well find a hole to curl up and die in rather than face your classmates that were witness to THAT! performance!

Nikita made me laugh too - her yearling colt and mini donkey gelding, when they are turned out in the same field as the mares were in, and one of the mares was in season, will spend the next hour or so fighting over who gets to inhale the "pee" spots. She said there is SUCH a kefuffle between the 2 of them jockeying for position to get the best whiffs of them. Clyde the donkey is SO darned protective of his very own mare's "pee spot" - he will wheel around and kick poor Vegas and charge at him to keep him away.

So - poor little Vegas gets odd whiffs here and there but the donkey pretty well has them all staked out as his!

"Spot"

[This message was edited by Spot on Jun. 18, 2003 at 01:01 PM.]

caffeinated
Jun. 18, 2003, 09:41 AM
LOL! I really wish I could meet Clyde...

Our Bob the Donkey is pretty silly himself. HE doesn't get much attention, so when I take the time to groom him and stuff he gets very relaxed, very happy, and next thing you know you get the thumpity thump on the belly. LOL Poor old guy...

_____________________________
"It takes a whole lot of testosterone to wear a beret and not look fruity"

Sambucca
Jun. 18, 2003, 11:12 AM
I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Thank goodness I never checked this thread when I was at work. It would have been hard to explain the full belly laughs. So many funny people and FUNNY HORSES around here.
Spot, don't let the grumpy ones get to you. Remember back in school when the boy that really liked you used to beat you up so that nobody would know and tease him about how much he liked you? Maybe that's what's going on with Loose Horse. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif Jealousy and lust. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

Spot
Jun. 18, 2003, 11:22 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Jealousy and lust. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Gee thanks Sambucca - the jealousy part I could understand - I mean when you are successful and gorgeous - hey - it comes with the teritory! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

But the lust part????? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

As my daughter is fond of saying "Think Happy Thoughts! Think Happy Thoughts!"

"Spot"

deltawave
Jun. 18, 2003, 05:57 PM
We saw an angelic little Shetland Pony entertaining himself in someone's front yard once on Mackinac Island. I assume he lived there, or perhaps he was a peeping tom! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

One of my first "jobs" on the track was putting rings on colts...they saved THAT job for the new female grooms... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Gwen is a BIG old ho...she has white paint between her hind legs where she scratches that "itch" when she's in heat, and has the new, sweet-tempered Appy gelding in such a lather he's actually starting to mount her now, much to her delight! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif She doesn't take "no" for an answer, but has made quite the man out of this little horse, who now thinks he's quite the stud. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

"If you think your hairstyle is more important than your brain, you're probably right." Wear a helmet!
Kelly (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/imag0009.gif)
Bonnie (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/fancy.jpg)
Gwen (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/bridge.jpg)

Black Market Radio
Jun. 19, 2003, 12:23 PM
My other Arabian colt was wagging his phwuwu today http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

Hey! We can have a new clique! It can be called the "phwuwu" clique!

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

sketcher
Jun. 19, 2003, 12:50 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by deltawave:

One of my first "jobs" on the track was putting rings on colts...they saved THAT job for the new female grooms... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Can someone educate me?? I'm almost afraid to ask..what is a ring, where does it go and what does it do?? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif For some reason, it doesn't sound like a fun job...

Spot
Jun. 19, 2003, 01:01 PM
oh sketcher - you poor, naive soul http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif - where have you been all these years?!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Can someone educate me?? I'm almost afraid to ask..what is a ring, where does it go and what does it do?? For some reason, it doesn't sound like a fun job... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

A ring is exactly what it sounds like - a ring - and you get to put it around the penis. Since, once the penis is erect, it gets engorged through the blood vessels, if you have a ring around it, it cannot GET any bigger!

Think of a tight ring on a finger on a hot day - you cant get the sucker off!

The thought process is that every time the colts play with themselves, they loose strength / their edge - whatever - sort of like the football coaches asking their players to refrain from pre game sex because they believe the players will play better if they have all of this pent up energy rather than losing it the night before or the morning of http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

I still think this is one of those stupid old wives tales, same as the stud managers that wont allow their breeding stallions to stand there and masturbate as they feel there is a limited supply of the stuff in there???

Clear now?! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

"Spot"

sketcher
Jun. 19, 2003, 01:16 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Spot:
oh sketcher - you poor, naive soul http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif - where have you been all these years?!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Can someone educate me?? I'm almost afraid to ask..what is a ring, where does it go and what does it do?? For some reason, it doesn't sound like a fun job... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

A ring is exactly what it sounds like - a ring - and you get to put it around the penis. Since, once the penis is erect, it gets engorged through the blood vessels, if you have a ring around it, it cannot GET any bigger!

Think of a tight ring on a finger on a hot day - you cant get the sucker off!

The thought process is that every time the colts play with themselves, they loose strength / their edge - whatever - sort of like the football coaches asking their players to refrain from pre game sex because they believe the players will play better if they have all of this pent up energy rather than losing it the night before or the morning of http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

I still think this is one of those stupid old wives tales, same as the stud managers that wont allow their breeding stallions to stand there and masturbate as they feel there is a limited supply of the stuff in there???

Clear now?! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

"Spot"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Is it only racehorses? I've heard of rings that MEN use - to KEEP their erections.... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_redface.gif I couldn't imagine why someone would want to do that to a stallion. 25 years with horses, how can I still be so ignorant?!!?

deltawave
Jun. 19, 2003, 01:34 PM
OK, I am NOT replying to this thread any more...every time it's up near the top I'm so embarrassed to be reading the BB! I'm afraid someone may look over my shoulder! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Anyhow, the ring on colts is to make it a little painful for them to get erections. What guys do to *maintain* erections is, I think, a little different...I am NOT going there!

"If you think your hairstyle is more important than your brain, you're probably right." Wear a helmet!
Kelly (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/imag0009.gif)
Bonnie (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/fancy.jpg)
Gwen (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/bridge.jpg)

mbp
Jun. 19, 2003, 01:43 PM
ROFL - I was sure that deleting this thread was the reason the bb was out yesterday!

Adelita
Jun. 19, 2003, 02:17 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by mbp:
ROFL - I was sure that deleting this thread was the reason the bb was out yesterday!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

LOL that's the first thing that popped into my headL "oh no, the Powers that Be at COTH have seen a thread entitled "Do horses masturbate" and have pulled the plug on the whole dang thing forever and ever!"

&gt;^.,.^&lt;
~~Linda

*~Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.*~

Black Market Radio
Jun. 19, 2003, 02:23 PM
We just keep getting crasser and crasser!!! Although the thong threads and others were well... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

sketcher
Jun. 19, 2003, 06:21 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by deltawave:
OK, I am NOT replying to this thread any more...every time it's up near the top I'm so embarrassed to be reading the BB! I'm afraid someone may look over my shoulder! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Anyhow, the ring on colts is to make it a little painful for them to get erections. What guys do to *maintain* erections is, I think, a little different...I am NOT going there!

_"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm sorry. I know it was crass. I was shocked to learn about the guy thing in college (don't ask, and no I didn't see it for myself...)and was confused to hear about it with horses so I had to ask. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Spot
Jun. 19, 2003, 06:32 PM
okay - now its MY turn for a question!

I saw this product advertised on a stallion supply site, and it is called "Stallion Brushes".

Now - I have to profess - what the heck is it and what does it do?? And what would you use it for?

I just dont think you would brush the poor things "down there" with brushes ???

A totally confused "Spot"

deltawave
Jun. 19, 2003, 06:43 PM
OK, I'm breaking my rule about this thread already...what in the NAME OF HEAVEN is that stallion brush thing? Something off on which they can whack? (Sorry, if you're a Beavis and Butthead fan you'll appreciate my laborious grammar) http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif I have a pretty good imagination, yet that contraption's intended use is beyond me...

"If you think your hairstyle is more important than your brain, you're probably right." Wear a helmet!
Kelly (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/imag0009.gif)
Bonnie (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/fancy.jpg)
Gwen (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/bridge.jpg)

Spot
Jun. 19, 2003, 06:51 PM
ha ha deltawave - that didnt take you long to break that promise! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Here is the web site address:

http://www.quillin.com/qshop/pages/Breeding___Stallion_.htm

There is also a contraption called a "Breeding Roll" - anyone have any idea what that would be used for ???

a still confused "Spot"

SoEasy
Jun. 19, 2003, 07:07 PM
Someone described the brushes earlier ... put THAT thing around the belly, it DISCOURAGES self pleasing behavior! (pain'll do that!)

deltawave
Jun. 19, 2003, 07:26 PM
Awww, poor stallion! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif I admit I haven't looked at ALL TEN PAGES! (we are a bunch of sick pervs)

The breeding rolls are to prevent an overly enthusiastic or--ahem--well-endowed stallion from injuring a small or maiden mare. They just get placed in the way. How'd you like THAT job? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Jeez, this is kind of R-rated, eh? Well, it's nature at its finest, is it not? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
OK, now I think I've shared every bit of horse porn I know...

"If you think your hairstyle is more important than your brain, you're probably right." Wear a helmet!
Kelly (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/imag0009.gif)
Bonnie (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/fancy.jpg)
Gwen (http://www.deltawave.homestead.com/files/bridge.jpg)

Adelita
Jun. 19, 2003, 07:29 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by deltawave:

The breeding rolls are to prevent an overly enthusiastic or--ahem--well-endowed stallion from injuring a small or maiden mare. They just get placed in the way. How'd you like THAT job? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

What do you mean, "placed in the way".....they look like a big ole pair of nutcrackers to me...you just squeeze it in there? Ouch!

&gt;^.,.^&lt;
~~Linda

*~Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.*~

Anne
Jun. 19, 2003, 07:51 PM
The roll is placed, er, between the stallion and the mare so that depth achieved is, um, shallow enough. Make sense?

Schatten
Jun. 19, 2003, 07:55 PM
this thread is great!!! http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> The roll is placed, er, between the stallion and the mare so that depth achieved is, um, shallow enough. Make sense? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

poooooor stallions. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/cry.gif

http://community.webshots.com/user/lskel84

Nikita
Jun. 19, 2003, 09:28 PM
http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif
I'm learning waaaaaayyy more than I wanted to know! I just keep imagining ordering some rolls, or rings, or brushes and having them accidentally delivered to the next door neighbours. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_eek.gif And then trying to explain what they are after the nieghbour opens the package. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif Goodness gracious.

My mind not only wanders, it sometime leaves completely.

Ain'tNoFoolinAround
Jun. 19, 2003, 10:58 PM
Coming into this veeery late-Have to admit, I was horrified and fascinated, doing the whole reading with one hand over the eyes thing, and hoping to god nobody walked in and saw what I was reading!!!

Anyhow, my friend used to work with Standardbreds at the track. One day when we came in to visit some of the horses she was working with, there's her young colt, standing with his butt to the door, rhytmically kicking himself (lightly) We look at one another, quite puzzled, as we aren't sure what he's doing. Into the stall we go, and both slowly back out, as we realise, that he's spankin the monster in his stall. They tried everything to get him to stop, even tied a wire BBQ brush to his belly, but he managed to get around it. From that day on, his nickname at the barn was Tha Masta Batahttp://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Unofficial Founder of the Tall People Clique! Member of the Klutz Klique, Member of the Thread Killer's Clique!

"Does anybody know how the story really goes or do we all just hum along?"
-Stone Temple Pilots

Rhonda
Jun. 20, 2003, 04:06 AM
A friend of mine has a STB also that wears a stud brush. If he doesn't he will just stand there all day ignoring his feed and hay but with a smile on his face. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

He was losing weight so it was either happy skinny boy or not so happy healthy boy. http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif

monstrpony
Jun. 20, 2003, 05:47 AM
All of a sudden, cribbing doesn't look so awful.

(actually, this thread has been very educational, not to mention stress-releaving. I mean, how many of us breathed a sigh of relief when we realized our geldings are somewhat normal, after all???)

___________
He's not really a pony, and I'm really not "pony aged" either.

Tha Ridge
Jun. 20, 2003, 09:37 AM
Ain'tNoFoolin - my mother's Betta's (the fish) name is Masta Betta.

This NEEDS to go in the Favorites area... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

- L.

Je suis un salamander. J'entrerai dans le feu mais je ne brûlerai pas.

McLeanHunterRider
Jun. 20, 2003, 11:10 AM
I have to add my funny story to this thread: One day, everyone was joking around and mentioned how funny it would be if Joy (a mare at the barn) had babies and how she would be such a good mother. Well, Joy overheard us, and she didn't realize we were kidding. The next day, which was a horse show, she tried to flirt WHENVEVER she saw a gelding. Joy had never done that before, and everyone was quite embarrased. We decided that we would never bring that topic up again, and she's been fine ever since... http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

When the beating of your heart echoes the beating of the drums, there's a new life about to start when tomorrow comes

Spot
Jun. 21, 2003, 06:18 AM
Its funny too how some stallons have their sexual preferences or they simply will not perform.

Spot Pocket wasnt fond of bay mares in the beginning. When we were trying to collect him, you could stand a bay mare next to the phantom (even if she was in full raging heat), and he would show mild interest, if at all.
Then - we'd bring out a chestnut mare, that just happened to be in foal (so showing NO signs at all!) and he dropped and got the job done lickety split!
he got better in subsequent years, but chestnut mares were always his favorites.

I have also heard of stallions that were so bad with certain colored mares, that for live cover, you'd need to bring the chestnut mare in tease, and as he was getting ready to mount, take her away and substitute the bay mare and by then, it was too late - he was so raring to go - he never noticed (or cared about!) the switch being done.

One SB stallion where we collect, will not collect off the phantom - he needs to be collected off a live mare, and usually one wont do it either. He needs to have 2 mares on either side of him to get him sufficiently aroused to get the job done. THAT is tricky - because you need two handlers for the 2 mares, one for the stallion and one holding the AV. So while the mares both have breeding hobbles on them and are twitched, you have an awful lot of people and horses in a very small space during a very vulnerable time ...

One of the stallions also is very prone to falling over once he is done breeding, so you also need to be sure as you are holding the AV that you are able to skeddaddle out of there in a hurry if he goes to fall over.

NO wonder these stallion managers have a lot of broken bones!

"Spot"

SoEasy
Jun. 21, 2003, 07:01 AM
Now imagine that you have a really nice stallion, and a really nice mare, and they are both 'virgins' ...

We were smart enough to get an experienced handler to come hold the stallion during this exercise, but I had teased and cleaned him myself, and then was the mare handler...

Unbelievably, all goes well ... UNTIL ... the deed is done, the boy looks exhausted, and he can't figure out how to get down .... fell off sideways, kersplat ::OUCH:: (he never did that again)

So, Spot, I need to thank you for telling that story! I thought for years he was the only horse who had ever had quite that sort of dismount http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Boss Hoss
Jun. 21, 2003, 02:00 PM
yes..about every 1.5hrs.

AWS Elite Stallion - Manahawk
2002 AWS Gold Medal Novice Award
Cool Breeze Farm, LLC (http://www.coolbreezefarm.com)
For Sale: Well used rain cloud that follows me around..will trade for a lemonade stand!

Black Market Radio
Jun. 21, 2003, 02:37 PM
My old trainer tried to "help" a stallion who was just a hair short on a mare once, and as soon as she touched "it" he lost his Hmm Hmm and jumped down and pouted in a corner... He was really offended and "Not in the mood" after that!!!

Here are the Devilpups!!
http://community.webshots.com/user/angelgregory87


GO MARINES!!!!!!!! OORAH!!!

dressager
Jun. 21, 2003, 08:57 PM
I hope I don't regret posting this, but asking my somewhat cute male vet would be too weird. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

My horse doesn't really do any of the behaviors listed here, etc but he drops it about 75% of the time when I'm around. According to others and from what I've observed, he doesn't do this unless I'm with him. What does this mean?

(I'll run for the hills now! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif )

Dressager (http://www.geocities.com/lubenkafarm)
You can't dance and stay uptight

OneonOne
Jun. 23, 2003, 12:03 PM
So, how long until this thread ends up in the Favorites section?

__________________________________

You put on the leather pants and the pants start telling you what to do. -Bono

Lazy Palomino Hunter
Jun. 23, 2003, 07:38 PM
You all jinxed me!!!

My poor gelding has never gotten -erm- *excited* before- at least not around me. But on Saturday, at a show, I had him in one hand, and a mare I was catch riding was right next to me (facing him). He was curling up his lip, and I thought it was cute (he's very mouthy, and CONSTANTLY chewing on things, cribbing, lipping things, licking things, and playing with his lips). I'm standing there poking his inside out lip and talking to him, when suddenly he grunts and half parks. I peeked under his belly and nearly peed my pants. I was so embarassed! We had to go for a nice, long walk AWAY from all the other horses. I had to steer him clear of that mare all day. He is such a dweeb...

(hehe, I spent several uncomfortable minutes trying to explain to non-horsey parents who witnessed the spectacle that it was merely my stupid horse not getting the message he was a GELDING, and NO there was nothing wrong with him...)

Alison

*Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups*

Celtic Witch
Jun. 23, 2003, 09:48 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SoEasy:
Unbelievably, all goes well ... UNTIL ... the deed is done, the boy looks exhausted, and he can't figure out how to get down .... fell off sideways, kersplat ::OUCH:: (he never did that again)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

LOL. My stallion's first few live breedings were similar. He couldn't quite figure out where to put himself and needed some help in that department (thankfully, he wasn't shy; just grateful!). Then, when the deed was done, he would just sit up there and look at me with a "now what?" expression on his face.

I tried pushing back on his knees to encourage him to dismount which didn't work. So, I held the lead close to and told the mare handler to walk the mare forward.

Monty just hobbles behind her! We went quite a way the first time before he slid off. It took about 6 breedings of the same before he finally figured it out. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif

Susie

Royal Oak Sporthorses (http://)

Go Kings!!!

Beezer
Jun. 23, 2003, 10:18 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Celtic Witch:
Monty just hobbles behind her! We went quite a way the first time before he slid off. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

And doesn't that just sound like a guy! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

***Dear Sam: All I really want for my birthday is FLYING LEAD CHANGES!!*** http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_mad.gif

PeriwinkleBlue
Jun. 23, 2003, 10:53 PM
Dressager, I used to work with a gelding who would do the same thing. My boss told me it was because he liked me. Not like liked, but that he enjoyed how gentle my hands were and it relaxed him.
So take it as a compliment and don't get too freaked out about it. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

*****************

He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

sketcher
Jun. 24, 2003, 10:24 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Beezer:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Celtic Witch:
Monty just hobbles behind her! We went quite a way the first time before he slid off. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

And doesn't that just sound like a guy! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

_***Dear Sam: All I really want for my birthday is FLYING LEAD CHANGES!!***_ http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_mad.gif <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Is he snoring? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

tidy rabbit
Jun. 24, 2003, 12:23 PM
I just recently got a gelding. My SO says "oh great, now you're going to get smacked on the head with his thingy when you're putting wraps on his legs. Why'd you get a gelding? He'll be slonging that thing around everywhere."

I couldn't believe this comment! But,,,, yesterday, the horse is masterbating in the crossties. I was in the tack room and could see him. He put it away when I came back. Guess my boyfriend knows more then I give him credit for. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_redface.gif) Guys. They're the same no matter what species.

~~Every year the senseless slaughtering of millions just for their hides. Poor little Nagas.~~

monstrpony
Jun. 24, 2003, 12:33 PM
Monstr is not anywhere near any version of remotely shy, if you get my drift. Has it out all the time, any excuse will do. And his is, umm, larger than your average.... This is a little--umm--difficult when I have visitors who don't know much about horses. Most are polite, and try to ignore it. Luckily, most of the kids have been too young to notice. But, I have, on more than one occasion, when asked, replied that "that" is why horsewomen have some difficulty taking men very seriously. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

___________
He's not really a pony, and I'm really not "pony aged" either.

KathyR
Jun. 24, 2003, 01:40 PM
I couldn't read this until today. Well, I could have, but hubby was usually in the same room. He would not understand. This thread MUST be saved to Favorites, and blocked for young children! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif Some replys are just too funny. Have to have been there to understand.

Older is just a state of mind. Where is mine?

Celtic Witch
Jun. 24, 2003, 03:34 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by sketcher:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Beezer:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Celtic Witch:
Monty just hobbles behind her! We went quite a way the first time before he slid off. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

And doesn't that just sound like a guy! http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

_***Dear Sam: All I really want for my birthday is FLYING LEAD CHANGES!!***_ http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_mad.gif <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Is he snoring? http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh jeez. After he's covered, he can barely make the walk back to his stable where he promptly lies down to go to sleep. I have to prod and poke him to get at his legs in order to remove his freakin' boots.

The first time, my husband offered him a fag and scotch for afters.

Susie

SBT
Jun. 24, 2003, 06:28 PM
Apparently, "doing it" is quite tiring for stallions. I know one who loses a HUGE amount of weight during breeding season. All that aerobic exercise, you know. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Have I mentioned that we have 5 Standardbred stallions boarded where I ride, all of them in the same barn. Amazingly, they don't seem to mind one another. But ANYTHING that comes in the door...human, horse, or otherwise, regardless of gender...gets "catcalls" from one particularly amorous stud...and then all the rest join in. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif It's like one big bachelor party. http://chronicleforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

mrgan182
Jun. 25, 2003, 12:21 AM
I knew a particular gelding, who was obsessed with masturbation. whenever you looked at him, he was going at it. he had a particular fondness for doing it while I was handling or riding him as well http://chronicleforums.com/images/custom_smilies/lol.gif
~M~

If you start getting nervous about getting hurt you will be....If you are worrying about the danger it's time to give up.
~Jason Weaver (jockey)